I lay on the hospital bed hooked up to a BIPAP. I'm struggling for air, I have been for about the past five hours. The doctors are standing outside the hospital room, talking to my parents discretely. I know their talking about me dying. It's bound to happen soon, I have been waiting to finally be at peace after a long hard journey. Especially after Augustus dying, my life has been pointless. I hear the door open up gently. My parents come in nonchalantly, acting like there perfectly unaffected by the conversation. They come sit on both sides of me and just smile at me. They know It is coming, they know soon they'll lose their daughter. I want to be able to act like I'm enjoying my last moments with them. I feel intense pressure on my lungs, it's a nine though. Augustus's death was my ten, nothing will beat it. This is a close tie to my ten though. I'm gasping for air, I feel terrible having my parents have to watch this. Their daughter is dying in front of their eyes. It's honestly torture, my mom has tears rolling down her pale cheeks. She chokes out the words "It will be alright Hazel, just imagine you are looking up at the stars. I somehow manage to imagine stars on the discolored hospital ceiling. My dad starts crying, it's not something I want to see. Nobody would want their parents to see them die. I mouth out the words "I love you so much" to them. They seem to understand, because they nod their heads with tear filled faces. I gently grasp their hands, and squeezed out my last and final slight smile. I gently close my eyes.
