A/N: The characters Octave and Via in this book belongs only to Finley Splatterson, and I have been given permission to use. Thanks and enjoy!

I ran through the stage as fast as I could. No, not that kind of stage. I mean kind of a level. I'm Octave, an elite octoling, at least I used to be, and I was training at the time. I was in black belly skatepark, with my favorite weapon, the octo-dualies. An inkling popped out of nowhere as I rounded the corner, and I quickly dodge rolled and hid in my ink. It didn't notice me until I popped out, and made very quick work of it with a couple of burst bombs. I wiped my brow with the back of my hand. Whew, I thought, glad I was able to splat that thing, as it had auto-bombs, as well as a foil flingza. I think that this certain training session was just about the hardest, until, of course, I was sanitized, and was thrown into the dark and despair-filled pit that is the Deepsea Metro. Don't worry, I got out of there alive, but it's a very interesting story, and it's the one I'm going to tell you now.

I was sitting in the locker room of base camp, and I put my octo-dualies in my locker, where my octoshot sat, almost completely unused. I changed out of my armor, and put on my casual clothes, as well as taking of my shades. I forgot to tell you a second ago, I'm not hypnotized. My shades are just for show. I yawned and headed into the cafeteria where I found my sister, Octavia, sitting at one table, whilst a couple of my buddies were at another. I blinked twice. I was very tired. I slumped into my bunker, and instead of having supper, I went to bed immediately. What I could've sworn, though, I might've been dreaming, but I thought I may have heard a couple of "Woomys", then some ink splashing, sounds of Octolings being splatted, then silence. I woke up clutching my head, as I had a tremendous headache at the time. When I finally opened my eyes, I realized that I was in some sort of interrogating room. A strange inkling with even stranger green gloop wrapped around half of his face walked forward. "What do you want?" I asked. He didn't answer. "What. Do. You. Want?!" I said again, this time much more firmly. He opened her mouth. "=£*£\€~^{£\¥_£]+~€€}**]+#%%[+#£!|£~€]+¥_£~£\+€}£€€!••!?•¥¥•£'£••\£££!?" I didn't understand a word he said. "T/))(rrn11111()$ng 000 sff ccccccoooo000099nnmnnb/):(temtemptemptemptemarrrrrrryeeee Sp-p-p-p-peeeeeaaa -:()chhhhh m000d3•••••" "Waaat?" I questioned. My inquiry was answered. "W-w-w-w whaaaaattts kra k k kelaken squ-squ-squ-squ-squiiiiddd0000!?" "I am not a squid, I'll have you know!" I was too caught up in the fact that he called me a squid to realize that there was some sort of AI. I know AI when I see or hear it. "Your an AI, aren't you?" I asked cautiously. Suddenly the inkling spoke normal. "Hhheeelllp-p-p kssssghh -eeee! C- kssssghhh -e! It- kkasssssshhh" I didn't know which was stranger- the fact that his voice was staticky, or the fact that he said "krakelaken" at the beginning of every sentence. Suddenly, a pair of glasses were shoved onto my face. These ones were different. I tried closing my eyes and blocking off the strange noises that they made, but to no avail. My eyes were forced back open, and I had to watch the swirling lights that were presented to my eyes by the glasses. After that, all I remember is ink firing, bombs exploding, pain, and unconsciousness. I opened my eyes to see two large beady eyes staring right into my face. "AaaaaaAAAGHHH!" My voice quickly escalated from a shout to a squeal. "Ahoy, Octoling!" He screamed in a raspy voice. "Up and at 'em, ya lazy whiffle whaffle!" He screamed once again. "This fight ain't over!" His breath reeked. "You're about to get a royal whoopin'! But there's no honor in defeating an unarmed opponent, and you seem to have lost your weapon somewhere around here." He looked around. "And just… where is… her, anyways? Last I remember, you were battling my protege, agent three, and then we fell in here." He said once again. I looked at him funny. "Who are you, anyway?" "I'm, uh...? I can't remember." I said, sheepishly. "Well, let's call a temporary truce to get out of here!" He held out his hand.

A/N: so, that's chapter one. In the next chapter they will probably meet the telephone, and then maybe c. Q. Cumber.