Chapter 1
A/N –
If you are starting this story new then as the description says we do not necessarily follow the linear path or timeline and for those of you worried about the opening action we do not begin at the end…
I would expect readers to have played through (or watched a YouTube play through) of the Mass Effect Trilogy but if you haven't and just want to go with it then I don't think it's a deal breaker… but you probably wouldn't be here if you hadn't already fallen in love with Shep and Liara et al.
For those of you who are already reading the story I've carried out an edit on Chapter 1 and 2. I've tidied, revised and in some places given it the re-write it needed once the story (or more importantly my writing) got into its stride. I will look at doing the same for another few chapters when I have a little more time.
Why "Through a glass, darkly"?
We experience the world around us and even ourselves through the lens of perception. And of course along the way we form perceptual preconceptions. Nicely complicated because our beliefs shape what we perceive, like the lens of a camera and our perceptions also help shape the lens.
The dictionary definition describes 'to see through a glass (or mirror) darkly is to have an obscure or imperfect vision of reality'. And certainly the mass effect story shows us very clearly the reality that our characters live in is certainly obscure and imperfect version of a reality that comes crashing down on them. The story is a journey towards an understanding of their true reality, a quest for truth.
Of course its original biblical meaning is that essentially we can only see a dim reflection of the true nature of everything while we see it through the 'distorted' glass of existence. And that distortion and dimness will be replaced with seeing truly 'face to face', unmediated, the reality or truth of the world/existence but this is only attainable after death.
I'm hoping our journey will lead us to some clearer perception of reality, at least in the mass effect universe, this side of the veil. Although if I'm being honest we will lose quite a few of our companions to the veiled archway as our journey unfolds.
For me the title also has another related meaning. As my story has dark themes I'm also trying to say that this particular glass we are looking through will take us to dark places in our character's psyche.
Unknown location - Unknown date and time
'Shit, shit, shit' pain welcomed her back to consciousness, the kind of pain that snatches your breath away.
She tested breathing, thinking about the mechanics of it. The sharp stabbing pain burned more intensely in her lungs as she inhaled. Shepard knew in that moment that every breath would be shallow and hard fought for.
'No, no, no don't move… still… stay still'
'Did I say that out loud or just in my head,' she couldn't hear anything, well that wasn't strictly true; there was noise, of sorts.
Shepard tried to analyse what she was hearing, 'Like being underwater or a silence so complete you can feel the pressure of it in your head.'
That thought brought back the edge of a memory but as fast as it entered into her conscious mind it drifted away again.
Shepard tried to move an arm but when she did it sent waves of burning, searing, crushing pain to her brain. She was completely immobilised but right now she couldn't tell whether it was from the weight of whatever it was pressing on her or her own broken body.
And it was dark, was it impenetrable dark, the black of space, the dark of shut eyes, the black of being buried.
'Are my eyes open', she thought, just as she felt herself drifting, the brutal awareness of her physical situation beginning to fade, like she was falling up and away from it.
"No, no, no don't pass out, stay awake, focus, what just happened, where the fuck am I… shit what the fuck happened".
This time she heard something, but the noise escaping her lips was more of a low, growling moan, the sound of a trapped, dying animal holding fast to life through sheer will.
Was this it then, would her life flash through her mind, well if it was Shepard was going to make damn sure she choose the highlights.
Reaching out in her mind to the one part of it that wasn't screaming with fear and pain and confusion, the one part of her mind that felt like an anchor to existence, warm and safe.
But as she was reaching for that place she heard a seductive voice that whispered she could let go now, she'd done enough, and she was so very tired. But there was something she needed to do; just one more thing and she knew who would tell her what it was.
Shepard was drifting up and away and she grabbed the most powerful memory she could to take with her, those blue eyes, the sound of her voice, the touch of her mind… Liara.
Therum, Knossos System - Systems Alliance space
Shepard looked up at the sky, it was really hot, and her armours micro climate was struggling to maintain comfort levels having, as usual, taken her helmet off. Given the choice she would always rather have her head in the environment groundside, and her shields gave a decent level of protection outside of a full on firefight.
It had been a hard fight getting this far. Meeting resistance from Geth snipers and troopers and also few heavies capable of blowing through the armour of the Mako ground vehicle there were in.
A rock fall further back had forced them onto foot but they were covering the ground quickly in a typical attack formation with Shepard as usual out front.
"Not much further now Commander" Kaiden was checking the map on his OT "Just the top of this drive, we should see the buildings soon."
"Skipper if you don't mind me saying, you really stink at driving the Mako, I don't think I caught so many bruises on a ride along since my troop transport took a wrong turn and we drove off a 50 foot cliff," Ashley was smiling and knew she was only repeating what was a commonly held opinion of their Commanders driving style.
'Well Ash I'm a marine and more used to operating bigger vehicles in space," Shepard said with a smile, "I don't do so well in two dimensions, but I haven't found a Mako or a crew that I could break so far, you gonna be the exception?'
"Hell no skip, just thinking we could take it in turns is al," Ash responded in good humour.
As they approached the final bend Shepard held up a fist as some instinct told her they had company waiting for them and a few seconds later the digital bleeps and chirps typical of Geth communication drifted across the hot dry air.
Hard hats back on and weapons at the ready they moved forward from cover to cover and were rewarded by getting the drop on a small group of Geth troopers.
The squad agreed silently how they would carve up the kills. They took up their positions and at the end of a finger count down opened fire taking down all targets within fifteen seconds.
Shepard walked towards the Geth position and poked one of the smashed up AI's body's with the toe of her boot.
"I'd still like to know what the hell the Geth are up to and what the hell they're doing this side of the veil," she pushed her sun visor onto the top of her head and knelt down to have a closer look, "let's take one of these memory drives even though they fry them if they get popped."
"Will do Commander," Kaiden said and she heard the sound of metal from where her LT was standing.
She looked up the wide drive that would lead them to the mine entrance where they were expecting to find the only daughter of Saren's co-conspirator Benezia T'Soni.
Shepard pulled her glasses back down to protect her eyes from the dazzling sun, "is it getting even hotter," she said rhetorically.
"All done Commander," Kaiden's voice rang out behind her. They formed up and continued on their way. Shepard occasionally lifting the Mattocks sight to her eye and scanning the top of the rise as she walked but it looked dead.
Reaching the top of the track they could see the walkway up to the entrance of the mine. To the left the storage area was congested with various containers and pieces of machinery rusting and abandoned.
In their path lay two large freight containers and as they began to skirt them Shepard noticed a shadow overtake them on the ground as she turned to look behind them the ground began to rumble.
The instant she saw the Geth drop ship she shouted to her squad to find cover. From behind one of the huge containers she watched as the ship disgorged a Geth Colossus which hit the ground with a mighty slam.
It was followed by two rocket troopers and a couple of very fast moving sniper units that seemed able to run up walls and hang upside down from surfaces.
The Colossus fired its plasma cannon on their position and the first round smashed into the container so hard it buckled a corner and Shepard felt the container bump her with the force of the blow.
The position they were in was a bad one and easily flanked by the rocket troopers.
"Fall back the trench", She knew they needed a minute to sort out a tactical response to the new threat and the trench they had used previously was about fifteen metres behind them, "Shield boost and run for it" She added.
Shepard was aware her team mates had begun the run to the trench as she began trotting backwards laying down covering fire and provide a focus of fire drawing it from Kaiden and Ash.
Seconds later Kaiden called through the comms that they were in the trench and laying down cover fire for her, she turned and ran for it.
Shepard called the gameplay she had worked our as she was pulling back from their first position.
"Ash, take out those Rocket troopers first once that's done focus fire on that Colossus," she turned to face Kaiden
"You use your biotics to catch that hopper and any friends he brought and take them out. Before we start I want us all to focus full AI jamming on that Colossus and keep re-jamming or use damping if they manage to override our tech.
I'm going to move forward and make a run up the left through the cover of all that junk is to flank the big guy, I figure by the time I get there you will be ready to focus fire on it so I won't have my ass hanging out," she finished with a grin.
After a very noisy five or six minutes and a couple of near misses from the plasma cannon all targets were down and they stood over the crumpled, hissing and sparking body of the huge Geth mobile gun.
"Nice work," Shepard said exchanging hand slaps with her team mates who seemed to be shaping up really well and both were certainly very handy in a fight.
"It's gonna be even hotter in this damn hole in the ground", Ash grumbled as they began heading towards the walkway.
"Hot as hell marine… just another glorious day in the Corps," Shepard said with a huge grin securing her glasses ready for the darkness that awaited them.
Working their way down through the levels of the mine they took out a couple of groups of Geth troopers but nothing bigger. A decidedly old, and badly maintained, looking lift offered them respite from the exertion of walking down the final four levels into the heart of the mine.
Stepping off at the bottom everything seemed eerily quiet and still, a feeling added to by the shimmering blue tinted light coming from their left which Shepard decided needed investigation.
Standing in front of the stasis field she lowered her weapon and couldn't help allowing a broad grin to form as the sight before her was not only amusing but entirely beautiful.
"Dr T'Soni I presume?" Shepard was sure the reference to an old Earth history story would be lost on all present, especially the Asari, but she noticed Ash smile out of the corner of her eye.
"Thank the Goddess I did not think anyone would come looking for me, but you are human, I…, well anyway this thing I am in is a Prothean security device so I need you to get me out of it. Hello?" The young Asari floating in the stasis field spoke quickly.
"So how did you manage to get stuck in there?" Shepard asked not able to keep the smile out of her voice.
"'I was exploring the ruins when the Geth showed up; can you believe that, Geth beyond the Veil? So I hid in here… I activated the towers defences I knew the barrier curtains would keep them out… but, but when I turned it on I must have hit something I was not supposed to. I was trapped. You must get me out. Please…,"
Her voice trailed away and this time there were longer pauses and the effort of speaking began to show.
"How long have you been in there?" Kaiden asked concern showing on his face
"Almost two Galactic Mean Time cycles and the barrier itself seems to be having an effect on me. I feel very weak and a little light headed."
"'So that's about 36 Alliance standard hours" Ash chipped in.
"Ok Dr T'Soni just stay calm a little longer we will get you out" Shepard nodded all trace of amusement now gone.
"There is a control in here that should de-activate the thing. You will have to find some way past the barrier curtain. That's the tricky part the barrier curtains cannot be shut off from outside. I do not know how you will get in here. Be careful there is a Krogan with the Geth and they have been trying different way to get past the barrier."
Concern and fear clearly showed on the young Asari's face.
"'Well you're lucky it was a team of Alliance Marines who came to your rescue Doctor we'll get you out, just sit tight" Shepard gave the Asari what she hoped was more of a reassuring smile than an amused one.
After dealing with a couple of Geth troopers that walked in on their recce of the area they used a mining laser to break under the space that the unfortunate Asari was trapped in then rode the lift up a floor.
"How did you get in here, I did not think there was any way past the barrier," Liara T'Soni said trying to look over her shoulder to where Shepard and the others were now standing.
"We need to get you out of there and off this planet as quickly as we can Doc before more Geth arrive" Shepard said walking over to the edge of the stasis curtain.
"Yes your right I have seen enough of them to last a lifetime and I really do feel very tired. There is a control on the console behind you which should shut down the containment field."
"Hang on skipper her mother is working for Saren are we sure she can be trusted outside that field?"
Ash spoke but Shepard could see the same concern on Kaiden's face. Before Shepard could answer Liara T'Soni spoke with a venom and hardness that hadn't been present in their previous exchanges.
"I am not my mother! I do not even… I do not know what my mother is doing with Saren and I do not want anything to do with that Turian bastard."
"If she was with Saren the Geth wouldn't be trying to kill her or capture her and she wouldn't have trapped herself in that barrier. Kaiden use the console and get this barrier down."
"Aye aye Commander."
As Kaiden moved towards the console Shepard moved close in behind the trapped Asari to catch her as the barrier came down.
The instant the barrier disappeared Dr T'Soni fell but Shepard caught her and lowered her so that that her feet were on the ground. Although able to stand she was very unstable on her feet and Shepard stayed close an acted as a support for her.
"So how do we get out from here," Kaiden asked
"I believe the platform in the centre of the tower is a lift that will take us up to the top level," Liara said and as they walked to the platform and activated the lift she said
"I still cannot believe this, why would the Geth come after me? Do you think Benezia is involved?"'
"Saren is looking for something called the Conduit, a Prothean device, you're a Prothean expert so he probably thinks you can help him to find it," Kaiden replied.
"The Conduit… I do not know…"' but the Doctors comment was interrupted as the sound of cracking and falling rocks filled their ears and the platform shuddered.
"What the hell was that," Ash's voice was steady but she looked edgy.
"'These ruins are unstable I believe the mining laser may have triggered a seismic event," Liara replied now leaning quite heavily on Shepard's arm.
"Well we, I, do like blowing stuff up… though we usually like to be at a safe distance when we hear the bang,"' Shepard said smiling trying to relieve the obvious tension that was present in the lift.
"That you do ma'am," Kaiden smiled at her.
"Joker! Get the Normandy airborne and lock in on my signal, at the double mister we are coming out hot."
"'Aye aye Commander, secure and aweigh. ETA 8 minutes." Joker's voice crackled over the comms.
"Prepare for a quick and dirty evac people," Shepard pulled her assault rifle to ready position trying not to disturb the Asari on her arm. She pulled her helmet on, and waited for the lift to complete its journey to the surface.
"'Not much margin for error from the sounds of things," Kaiden voiced what they were all thinking.
As the lift reached the final level they were confronted with the Krogan battle master that the Doctor had warned them about who had a rocket trooper and a couple of ordinary troopers with him.
"'Surrender or fight, choose fight I am looking forward to ripping you apart," the Krogan smiled showing his sharp teeth.
Like the well-oiled machine they were the three marines instantly took positions and started to take down the Geth troopers then turning their combined firepower on the Krogan.
Shepard placed herself in front of the Asari pushing her down behind the console in the centre of the lift. It was over in less than a minute. The combination of tech, biotics and firepower gave the marines the edge against higher troop strength and higher numbers. It was the combination that made the Alliance military a force to be reckoned with even if their overall numbers were not as high as other military forces.
Shepard turned to the Asari and helped her up and they moved forward from the lift onto the metal walkway, as they emerged and began to run for the exit huge chunks of rock began cascading from higher up and surrounding walls, some hitting the walkway sending shudders up through their boots. Shepard also noticed the Asari was having trouble keeping up in her weakened state.
"Come on Doc let me help,"' Shepard turned to the Asari, lifted her easily and put her over her shoulders and began running for the exit with Kaiden and Ash in front.
She could only vaguely hear, because of the noise from the rock falls and quakes, what sounded like apologetic protestations from over her shoulder but Shepard also felt the Asari holding tightly onto her.
They emerged from the mouth of this higher level of the mine followed by rushing air carrying dust and the sounds of the destruction they had left behind. The Normandy was waiting with flight deck ramp dropped and it was only when they were safely inside did Shepard put Liara T'Soni back on her feet.
"Straight to the med bay for you Doctor T'Soni, let me escort you. Kaiden, Ash debriefing with the rest of the team in thirty."
Shepard removed her helmet and looked for the first time properly into the eyes of the woman in front of her.
"I need to tell you how grateful I am Commander for saving me and trusting me, I…. I… am not used to… I have never met… oh Goddess I think I am just feeling overwhelmed by my experience. Please Commander call me Liara, if you feel that is appropriate of course," Liara's hand went to her forehead and she looked somewhere above Shepard's head.
"Yes we really didn't have time for proper introductions did we? Please call me Shepard, only my mother gets to call me by my first name which I hate," she smiled at Liara and her smile was returned.
Something happened in that moment, something between them connected, Shepard didn't quite know what it was… but it felt right… natural… like coming home…
