Jack Bauer skipped along the sidewalk humming to himself. Finally he had a break! He would get to spend the whole week with his wife Audrey! "Whoopee!" (yes, Jack Bauer just said Whoopee)

Beeeeeeeeeeeeep, beeeeeeeeeeeeeep. His phone rang. BOMB! Jack quickly cut the wires in his phone and looked around to see who could have planted the bomb. He chose a random kid who looked about 9.

"Drop your weapon! I said drop your weapon now!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"You mean my air soft gun?" the kid shot Jack.

"Terrorist! Call a medic I have been shot!" yelled Jack.

"Hey are you a medic?" Jack asked a young boy who appeared to be the "terrorist's" friend.

"I'm a 3rd grader."

"Close enough, help me I have been shot."

Several minutes later Audrey drove up and got out of her bright pink convertible.

"Jack why are you on the ground? Why is that kid putting a band aid on your foot?"

"Oh hi Audrey," Jack stood up forgetting about his foot. "I was just on my way to our house."

"Well Buchanan called me. There is another terrorist threat and we need to help."

"NO YOU CAN'T MAKE ME GO!" Jack screamed.

"I'll give you a chocolate chip cookie," said Audrey.

"NO! Wait did you say chocolate chip?"

Several minutes later Chloe O'Brian could be found practicing her looks in the mirror.

Beeeeep, beeeep. The phone rang.

Chloe did her famous scowl, she had just had a major breakthrough on a look that she hoped would make her look less mad but still like she knew what she was doing.

"What." She snapped into the phone.

"Chloe," Buchanan's voice was on the other line. "As usual we have another terrorist threat and even more common we don't have time for your personality disorders."

"Why do I even bother trying to have a life with you whining to me for help all the time?"

"What life? You were practicing your scowls in the mirror, weren't you?"

Chloe hung up the phone.

"Hello? Chloe?" Bill shrugged and hung up the phone. "She sure is cheerful isn't she." He muttered to himself.

Edgar Stiles pulled out a gun (a water gun that is) and thought how tough he must look. Whoa. He wouldn't want to double cross him if he were a terrorist. No Sir! Even Jack would be impressed if he saw him now. Boy, all this tough business was making him hungry! He waddled over to the fridge and pulled out a hamburger.

Beeeeep, Beeeeeep, Beeeeeep

"Edgar Stiles," Edgar answered the phone

"Edgar, you have been here for a long time now, you don't have to use your last name," it was Bill.

"Hey that is Chloe's line," Edgar was outraged that Bill would even think of using Chloe's line. "Make up your own line."

"Yeah you could use that advice. I know you are always trying to look like Jack with your water gun. You think you are so special, and you are. That is what I am going to call you Special Ed!"

"Why are you calling me," Edgar quickly changed the subject.

"Oh right. There is another terrorist threat. You need to come to CTU right away. (Under his breath)Special Ed."

"OK." Edgar hung up.

He looked sadly at his half eaten hamburger.

"I'm sorry," he said in a tearful voice. "I must leave you to fulfill the last wish of my poor mother that I, Edgar Stiles would always help to save the world."

After several minutes of this annoying wanna-be hero talk, Edgar finally waddled out the door, grabbing a handful of Twinkies on his way and headed to CTU.

Kim and Chase were fighting over Kim's latest blonde moment where she had put dishes in the washing machine.

"I'm telling you Kim, the clothes washer is for clothes and the dishwasher is for dishes hence the name dishwasher."

"But they both sound so alike it is hard to tell the difference."

"Why did I even marry you?" Chase was growing impatient. "You honestly have to be the stupidest person I have ever met! Somehow you manage to get kidnapped at least once every season, cause terrible things, blame them on your dad, call CTU at the most inappropriate times, and get through the day unscathed."

Beeeeep, Beeeeep

Kim answered the phone.

"Hello", she said in the ear piece.

Chase impatiently snatched the phone away from her.

"Edmonds," (he is cool enough to use his last name)

"Chase, it is Bill. I need you to drop by CTU, there is another terrorist threat."

"Good, I hate that place but I would rather get my hand chopped off than stay here with Kim," said Chase.

"You are still together? I didn't think that anyone could stay with Kim that long without going brain dead."

"Jack did," Chase pointed out.

"Yeah but he is Jack Bauer. Anyway I need you to bring Kim in too."

"What? No! She will only cause frequent disruptions," argued Chase.

"I will offer you constant protection from Jack when he has an axe."

"Fine. Oh I need to go Bill, Kim is playing with matches."

Chase and Bill hang up.

Curtis Manning was jamming at his rap club.

"Hit it funk master Curtis Manning!" said the DJ and Curtis began to beep box.

Just then a Beeeep, Beeeeeeeeeep interrupted his song. Everyone began to groan, they had been doing so well.

"What is it?" Curtis asked impatiently. "You messed up my groove man."

"What?" Bill asked.

"Oh… Um…" Curtis didn't know that the director of CTU was on the other line. "So why are you calling?"

"Uh… there is another terrorist threat and I need you to come in."

"OK, I will be there soon," said Curtis.

Normally Curtis would protest but he didn't want Bill to discover his secret passion for funky rap music.

Tony was playing x-box when:

Beeeeeeeeeep, Beeeeeeeeeep.

"Tony will you get that?" Michelle asked.

"But I just got to a new level on Guitar Hero 2."

"Get it," said Michelle in a threatening voice.

"Ttt," Tony sneered, but answered the phone.

"Yeah," Tony answered the phone.

"Tony it is Bill, there is another terrorist threat and we need you to help."

"No I quit that place and I am not coming back."

"If you don't come then I will smash your Cubs mug," said Bill.

"You don't have my Cubs mug," Tony said more to convince himself than Bill.

"Wanna bet."

Tony looked in his cupboard. It wasn't there.

"What did you do with it?"

"Nothing yet and I won't if you come back to CTU."

"If you lay and hand on it I will-"

"You will decide the fate of your mug," Bill interrupted.

"Fine I will be there."

"With Michelle?"

Tony paused.

"I am not going to endanger my wife."

"I have your mug…"

"Fine, I'll bring Michelle."