A Sailor Home From the Sea (continued)

He did regret not being there for his wife and son, would have felt guilty if he'd allowed that feeling to take hold, but he had the sea in his blood and knew dwelling on it wouldn't change that, only make him feel worse than he already did.

A sailor's life, once the sea took hold with her siren's call, insinuated herself in every part of a being till she meant almost more than life its self, didn't revolve around what wish or want they might hold for themselves or their families but her demands. If there was a ship bound to sail somewhere and they needed a deckhand then any sailor, once that so often cruel mistress had captured them, had to leave the land behind, return to her, to sail.

He had managed to make it back four times the first year his son was born, staying a whole month each time before he could no longer resist the call of the ocean. The second year he only managed to make it back three, but considering he resisted her call near a month and a half the one time figured it all just about squared. The third and fourth years he had still managed to visit three times but for only a couple of weeks each time before he was off again. As the ships he was able to sign onto sailed farther in quest of their profits, the voyages becoming longer time spent from his wife and babe he had no choice but to follow. And still he had little coin to show, to leave behind for the needs of his family.

Annie, his dear sweet Annie, and God bless her for the saint she was, would mention on each of his visits home that perhaps if he called round at the butcher's shop there might be a need for help, or she'd heard a rumor the Granger over near Alverstoke was taking on hands. She never said these things in a nagging or peckish way, simply put them out there for him to consider, hoping to have him here with her even though she knew deep in her heart he'd never leave the sea no matter how much he loved her, he'd easier give up breathing.

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From the minute he'd come through the door on this visit she'd known something was different. For one thing he'd brought another fellow with him, introduced him as Jack, "It's Captain…Captain Jack Sparrow William" the man interjected. Annie gave him a skillful once over, she was very good at judging character, and that ability, she at least chose to believe, had, considering some of the characters Bill had dragged home with him in the past, saved them the loss of possessions they could ill afford to lose. Even though the man was apparently unable to stand still for a moment, rocking back and forth and swaying about fluttering his hands around, eyeing, as well as touching a great deal of everything in the room, Annie got the impression, although his manner of dress presented him as somewhat of a scalawag, he probably wasn't really a bad sort of fellow. He might even be a bit on the good looking side if it wasn't for that mass of hair hanging about all over. She held her hand out, "Captain Sparrow." Jack stepped back over, took her hand and gave her a bow, "Mrs. Turner." Bill let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding, even allowed a little smile to flitter at the corners of his mouth. Jack had apparently passed in her judgment of him, but then Bill decided he really shouldn't be surprised, even in the short time he'd known him one of the first things he'd realized, beside a tendency to exaggerate almost everything he said, and be a bit on the unlawful side of things, was Jack could charm the birds out of the trees if he set his mind at it. Then he noticed something that was not there to notice. He looked around and back at Annie, "Where'd be young William?"

"If I'd known you was to be home I'd have kept him here Bill, but I been feeling poorly lately and when Sophie and Andrew came for a visit last week they took him to stay with them for awhile in Hampshire. You know how they dote on him Bill and he was real excited about going and staying on his Uncle and Aunt's farm for a few weeks. We can go fetch him tomorrow if you've a mind to."

Bill looked down at the floor, and she knew what he was going to say before the words ever crossed his lips, "You're leaving so soon then?"

He couldn't look up at her at first, but finally forced himself meet those sad brown eyes, eyes that were valiantly trying to hold back the tears of hurt and disappointment, of frustration that she couldn't hold on to her man half as well as that fickle mistress the sea did without near the effort.

Bill looked back down at the floor, unable to continue meeting those eyes as he spoke, "Jack," and Jack, not insensitive in the least to what was going on between them, understanding the gravity of the situation gave Bill a sympathetic look and refrained from correcting the form of address he'd just used, "is master of his own ship, the Black Pearl. He's a venture planned that'll make us rich Annie and we've need ta be off with the morning tide. Just one more voyage and yer Bill won't leave ya again." And even though those last words tasted a lie he said them anyway, had said them before, and no doubt would say them again, and knew Annie recognized them for what they were as well as he. Out of the corner of his eye he saw her body slump, almost fold in on its self for a moment, then straighten as she drew on every bit of strength she possessed, smoothed down her dress with hands she was just able to keep from trembling, and turned to walk off toward the kitchen. Anyone who didn't know her as well as he probably wouldn't have even noticed the slight quaver in her voice as she cast back over her shoulder, "Bill, offer Captain Sparrow something to drink, I think there's still part of a bottle of rum in the sideboard. I'll just fix the two of you something to eat. Lord knows when either of you've had a decent home cooked meal."

Bill stood there continuing to peer intently at the floor as he berated himself mentally for what he was doing to this woman, but he knew from experience he couldn't give up either her or the sea willingly, was caught between them as surely as if he were bound by chains, and most likely would be till the day he died.

As Annie left the room Jack stepped over and put a gentle hand on Bill's shoulder, "You've a bonny fine woman there William."

"Aye Jack, she is that and more." He snuffed a little as he turned away from Jack for a moment to wipe his eyes, "More's the pity she took up with the likes of a worthless lumberin oaf like me."

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Long into the night Bill lay there awake, his arms securely holding his precious Annie to him. After their intimacy he had tried to talk to her, tried to tell her how he felt. But she had smiled a sad smile and put her fingers to his mouth silencing him. In a soft voice as she looked up into his eyes she said, "Hush now, don't spoil our moment here, sides you'd not be telling me anything I don't already know William Turner. Just take this with you when you go and never forget, I'll be here for you long after she's cast you aside." She gave him a kiss, wrapped her arms around him, and settled against him. He felt her tears against his chest, although his own fell to the pillow beneath his head.

The End

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