Meyer owns Twilight and Bret Easton Ellis owns The Rules of Attraction.
Gang of Four - Natural's Not In
Joy Division - Love Will Tear Us Apart
The Strokes - Reptilia
Franz Ferdinand - Michael
"Know me? No one ever knows anyone. Ever. You will never know me." Lauren, The Rules of Attraction.
Bella Party at Dartmouth. Didn't want to go. Alice made me. She said "It's the party of the year Bella! Plus there will be top notch weed and alcohol and hot rich guys. You know I always provide." I went. I needed the release. It also stopped her incessant whining.
She made me wear a sequined blue dress that had long sleeves. Made me wear a trilby as well. It was cute actually. Black trilby. The fairy sure knew how to dress. She even gave me her favourite Dior sunglasses. It was dark outside. I still put them on along with my sneakers. Hip. Groovy. Chique. Whatever.
Party was at a frat house. Great. Horny rich boys trying to get into my pants. Just what I need. At least there'll be alcohol and maybe drugs. That thought alone calms me. For the moment.
We arrived at the party at 10. Fashionably late as Alice put it. She's into all that stuff. I don't know what stuff but she's into it. Alice also likes fashion so I guess it does make sense that we are 'fashionably late' as she put it. I'm sick and tired of the party already.
The music was loud, pulsating across the room. The party was everywhere. The atmosphere is intense. Sweat. Alcohol. Sex. Music. People were gyrating against each other on the dance floor. Some blonde kid touching himself as he stared at a guy. Can't see the guy's face.
In the kitchen I see Emmett, amongst all the smoke and red cups, making out with a blonde girl. I recognise her. Rosalie Hale. She's in my English class. Bit stuck up. She glared at me a couple of times when I talked to Royce King. Not that I give a crap. Her problem.
Where's Alice? Alice promised me weed. Now she's dancing with some sandy haired Dixie. Pushing her petite self against him. I want the weed. I want to get high as soon as possible. I miss Forks. I miss Charlie. I miss Jacob.
The music calls me. Some Joy Division tune. Or was it Strokes? I don't care. The music calls me. I managed to get some dope off Tyler fuck-head Crowley instead. Not top notch at all, cheap though. Tyler moves me to the dance floor. He can't dance. Neither can I. Even matched. Life sucks.
My trilby is stuck to my head. I'm all sweaty and hot. I want to take it off. As I reach for it a hand stops me.
Mike He's gorgeous. I want him. He was like a Roman god. Standing there by the stairs, with all his mighty powerful presence, surveying the crowd with those enchanting emerald eyes. Us mere mortals quake in our boots by his mere gaze. He exudes sex. From the unusual unkempt bronze hair to his meticulous clothes. Everything about him is fascinating. And hot. Fuck was he hot. I'm so horny just by staring at him.
I've seen him before. Around campus. He rides a motorbike. Sexy. His hair is always a mess. He can't control it. Glad he can't. So fucking hot. Want to run my hands through it. He never turns up for class but maintains perfect grade in all his subjects. Intelligent. Always has a cigarette, Camel, behind the ear and Baileys in his hand. Smooth. I've said six words to him. "Hi you're sitting in my seat." He mumbled something back and sat somewhere else. He wants me. I'm positive.
I stare at him for a while in my corner. Just stare.
Jessica Stanley is next to me.
I screwed her a couple of weeks ago and she wants more. She's touching me now. I don't want her touch. I want his. Jessica keeps on touching me. She undoes my jeans button. Pulls down the zip. Her cold hand palms me. I imagine I'm somewhere else. I'm with someone else. She strokes. He strokes. I moan. This is too much. I grab her him and kiss the lips. Everything is different.
He strokes harder. I groan. I'm about to cum. She whimpers. I notice the girl in trilby from my poetry class is dancing all over to a Franz Ferdinand song. I see her. I see him. He sees her.
Strokes become harder. I cum.
I whisper his name.
Bella The hand stops me from taking off my trilby. It's masculine and large. It moves down my arms and around my waist. "Don't take it off." says a velvety voice from behind me. I try to turn to see who it is but he stops me. Both his hands are on my hips as we dance to the song. The song. Joy Division. The Strokes. It all becomes one. Rock 'n' Roll right? The song.
Love, love will tear us apart again
Room is on fire and she's fixing her hair
I can feel his whole body behind me. It's hard and long. He's tall. Very tall. My head ducks down under his chin. We dance. Just dance until it becomes too much. "Lets get out of here." He whispers in my ear. I agree. I like him. He sounds delicious. Tyler scowls at him. Then cowers. Lauren claims him. Not after she sneers at me. What the hell is her problem? But that was before she saw who was behind me and she nearly melts. She looks like she just came in her pants. Who is this guy? All I can see is a hint of red but not red, brown but not brown messy hair.
I should really take the sunglasses off. Can't be bothered.
He grabs my hand again and we move. I still can't see his face. Alice has disappeared somewhere. So has the Dixie. Blonde boy still touching himself but looking angry at me. What's his problem? Who is this guy? I miss home.
He leads me away. From the music. From the dancing. From the sweaty people all out of their heads high. Like me. Actually. I'm not even sure if Tyler gave me the right stuff. I could feel my high going. I bet it wasn't even weed. I bet I wasn't even high. I did have three shots of tequila before. He gave them to me. Then the 'weed'. Prick.
This guy takes me away. I like him a lot now. He seems handsome. I still haven't seen his face yet. "You're beautiful." He whispers in my ear once we're in a room upstairs. By ourselves. The lights are off. I can't see his face. I want to see his face. I need to see his face.
"I need to see your face." I say. He lets out a shy sigh. Lights come on. I take the sunglasses off.
I blink.
He's beautiful.
Emmett Rosalie Hale is sitting in my lap. Rosalie Hale, the girl that all the guys are lusting after, is sitting on my lap. Rosalie Hale, the most beautiful girl in the whole goddamn planet. Rosalie Hale. And she's sitting on my lap kissing my hand. Hell yeah.
"Baby you are too fucking gorgeous." I whisper in her ear. She nuzzles closer to me. Her golden hair is everywhere like the sun and I bask in it.
"Emmett." She sighs out. She kisses up my neck. Her hands are everywhere. Passionate hands, wanting me. Me! Emmett McCarty. I'm hers anyway. From the first time I saw. After picking Bella up from her English class. She glared at Bella then. Was she jealous? Or just angry with Bella for flirting with Royce King. Bella doesn't know though. I didn't even know until she told me. She trusts me for some reason. I earned her trust.
I see Bella on the dance floor. She looks high. How did she get high? I'm meant to look after her. Then I see him going after her. Dancing with her. I don't want him anywhere near her. He's bad news. Bella doesn't need attention from him. Where's Alice? She's meant to be with Bella. I growl.
But I stop when Rosalie kisses my lips. I look down at her. Violet eyes are gazing up at me. I'm lost. She looks back down.
"You'll promise to be with me forever?" She mumbles to my chest.
"Forever."
"Protect me." She says scared. I tilt her head back up and give her a searing kiss. "Forever."
Edward It was meant to be a lousy party. The lousy twat head Jasper Whitlock made me come. "Come on Edward. It'll be an awesome party." He says in his room as we smoke and belt out some Smiths on my guitar. I agree. We carry on smoking.
That was all before the fucker ran off with some black haired midget, no doubt getting laid. I'm left on my own. Joy.
I light a Parliament and take a long drag as I watch the people. Take a sip out of the Jack Daniels I nicked off Jasper. Rock 'n' Roll. Story of my life.
The girls are all making eyes at me. Simpering and coy glances. I ignore them. Even this wanking blonde guy stares at me as he touches himself. Mike Newton I think his name is. I am disturbed by the sight. I move away. I don't fucking need that tonight.
The Strokes are playing. People are dancing like complete douches. I stand by the stairs and carry on watching. My last cigarette nearly finished. I didn't want to be here. These rich kids think they are so fucking hard with their weed and underage alcohol. Real badass. Dreaming of the perfect life but with advantageous economic circumstances. Yeah real badass. If only they knew. I look around, at the dance floor.
I see her.
She looks fucking dazzling.
She always does.
She's wearing a blue sequined dress that reaches mid thigh. Showing off those long creamy legs of hers. I can imagine them around my waist. The sleeves reach to her wrists. Too bad. At least her legs were on show. Those legs. Fuck. She also has sunglasses on. In the middle of the night. I'm turned on already. Although that was before I noticed the trilby. The trilby was fuck hot. Icing on the sweet cake. I have a raging hard on because of that trilby. Damn.
She dances. Hands in the air. Skin. White. Glistening. Mouth watering. Brown hair everywhere, dancing to their own rhythm. Trilby somehow stays on. Her body moves to the beat clumsily. She has no idea what she's doing. Flawless.
I always notice her. Ever since I saw her. It was in English. A month ago. I don't even take that class. I was bored so I decided to go to English. I thought I might read as well book during the lesson.
That was until I saw her. I was sat right at the back. She strolled into class. Her wavy brown hair out. All she wore was a tattered Pink Floyd t-shirt and a denim powder blue mini skirt along with stripped black and white tights. In the middle of October. And also an orange béret. Ooh la la.
In her hands was a battered Jane Austen book. Persuasion. She likes depressing classics.
She sat next to Royce King and smacked him when he pinched her ass. I nearly snapped his neck off there and then. She started reading her book. She stopped when class was in order. I just stared at her the entire lesson.
I was too focused on her. Her whole persona radiates sexy and innocent at the same time. Her pale face that always has a sad expression. Her frowning red lips imperfect and perfect at the same time. The top lip larger than the bottom. I was hard instantly when she licked them as she concentrated. She was skinny as well. Not bony skinny but meaty skinny. Just how I liked.
And then her eyes. Those large brown eyes. They scared the shit out of me with their meaningfulness and emotional impact. The universe was in those eyes. It was like she could see into your soul. She had yet to look at me. She never did. She. She. She. I still don't know her name. People called her by her nickname but I wanted to know her real name.
I was smitten.
I was besotted.
She was perfect.
I wasn't.
I was a druggie, alcoholic, man whore, ruff, aggressive, unruly, socially and emotionally awkward.
She was perfect.
I couldn't destroy perfection.
A month I stared at her. Too scared to go anywhere near her. She had friends. Loads of friends. The only close one was the black haired midget.
I knew little things about her.
She likes Thomas Hardy. Saw her reading Tess of the D'Ubervilles by the bleachers. She was crying.
She likes Bob Dylan. Siouxie and the Banshees. The Jam. The Cure. Bowie. Old 70's and 80's music. Different band shirt everyday. Like I said perfection.
She likes apples. Always has one in her bag.
She likes pop tarts. She has one for breakfast every day.
She loves Emmett McCarty. They were always together.
Jasper told me that they're cousins. But the giant glared at me when he caught me staring at her. I wouldn't blame him. I was borderline stalker if not one already. I had become obsessed.
Too afraid to approach her.
The closest I've ever been near her was a week ago. I sat behind her in some poetry class that I didn't take, when out of nowhere the blonde wanker comes up to me and tells me to get out of his seat. I move. Not wanting to cause a fight in front of her. Otherwise I would have pummelled the dick.
Closest I've ever been to her.
Until tonight.
Bella He's beautiful. I want him. I want him now. I lock the door. No interruptions. I move closer to him. I forget Forks. I forget Charlie. I forget Jacob. He feels like home. My lips touch his. Soft. Home. Bronze. Home. His eyes open. Green. Home.
Mike "Edward."
Jasper She moans my name as I kiss her. Her small body vibrating all over for me. This was it. This was my time with the stunning Alice Brandon. And I was going to make it a time she will never forget.
Jessica Michael you're the boy with all the leather hips. Sticky hair, sticky hips stubble on my sticky lips. Michael you're the only one I ever want, only one I ever want, only one I ever want. Beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor. Michael you're dancing like a beautiful dance-whore. Michael waiting on a silver platter now. And nothing matters now.
Edward I see her dancing everywhere and have this sudden urge to go to her. She looks so beautiful. So carefree. So free.
I gather the courage and approach her. Just as her hand reaches the trilby I grab it. I don't want her to take it off.
"Don't take it off." I whisper in her ear. She tries to turn but I stop her. I don't want her to see my face yet.
My hands snake down her sleeved arms, the sequins everywhere, until finally they are around her small waist. We dance together. In rhythm. In sync with each others body.
Joy Division is playing.
She looks high. I don't think she's high though. More in the moment. I'm in the moment with her. I never want to be anywhere else. Her arms come up from behind and loop around my neck as we dance. I want to be closer. Her ass is grinding into me. I want her closer. I want her. Now.
"Lets get out of here." I'm too scared for her answer. Her rejection.
Surprise. She takes my hand and leads me away. I see the guy, the dick she was dancing with before, scowling at me. I glare back. She's mine.
She leads. My leading lady. We somehow find an empty room. Its dark. No light. The door closes. Music still thumping through. I'm encompassed by her. I move closer to her. I'm intoxicated by her scent. Flowers and all things sweet. Just how it should be. "You're beautiful." I whisper in her ear. "You are so goddamn beautiful it hurts." I whisper again, my hands run down her arms. The sequins catch on my nails and rip.
"I want to see you face."
My face. I'm scared. What will she do when she realises who I am? I'm nothing. She's everything. She is the moon while I am a star, so far away from her yet so close in the sky. Outshone by her large presence and basking in her glow. All I do is stare. Until tonight. I'm scared.
She wants it. So I give. Everything for her.
I sigh. I turn the light on. I close my eyes immediately. Silence. The door shuts. She's gone. I let out another sigh. Eyes still closed. World torn apart. Deal with it Cullen.
Until. Softness on my lips. Small hands on my shoulders. Warm body covers me like a blanket. Wet lips. Eyes open. Brown.
"You're beautiful." She murmurs.
Bella I kiss him again. And again. And again. So sweet. His hands move to my waist and grab tightly. My arms lock around his neck. I move closer. His hair is so soft. I sigh. Finally content.
"You're beautiful." I whisper between kisses. His lips travel down my neck. Wet, absorbing, satisfying kisses. Sequins rip everywhere. Alice is going to kill me. I don't care. All that matters is the boy kissing my throat. Home.
My hands travel down his back. His shirt rides up as my hands hunger for skin. My neck. Biting. Sucking. Vampire.
I lift his shirt off. His skin is so pale. Alabaster. And toned. Not six pack toned but lean and firm. Gorgeous. I moan. He immediately comes back to me. His hands are now in my hair, twirling a lock around his index finger.
His green eyes darkened with want. "You have no idea how long I've wanted this."
What? I'm confused. His kisses come back and I forget. Home. My hands run over his hard chest. Down. Lower. His zipper.
He grabs my hand.
Edward Her hands move over to my zipper. They pull. I stop her. She looks at me hurt. I don't want her to be hurt. But I have to know first. "What's your name?" I ask.
"Bella." She frowns, confused.
I shake my head. "No your full name."
"Isabella Marie Swan."
"Isabella." I groan and kiss her. I free her hands. Back on track. "Isabella. Isabella. Isabella." Only I say her name. Everyone calls her that mediocre beautiful name but I'm the only one who calls her true. Isabella. I want to be the only.
Her hands pull down my jeans and all I'm left in is my boxers.
Isabella's still fully clothed. Can't have that now, can we. I search for the zip of her dress. I can't find it. I groan in frustration. She giggles. I look down at her and smile. She smiles back up at me and slowly, oh so slowly, she pulls the zip of her dress down the side. However she stops just when she's about to take it off.
Isabella gives me a challenging look. So fucking sexy. "Your name?"
I desperately want the dress off. "Edward Cullen." She gasps. My face pales. Not now. Not when I finally have you. I look down. Why do I have to be such a screw up? I ruin everything for myself. I went through life doing shit all, thinking it won't affect me. And now I have the perfect girl in my arms and she doesn't want to know.
I see a small hand on my arm. I look up. She's glorious. Absolutely glorious. Her skin shining in the light and so fucking pure. Her large brown eyes look up at me and they show compassion and relief. "Edward." She says simply and starts kissing me again. Heaven. Utopia. Nirvana. Call it what you may. I call it Isabella.
I feel her everywhere. Her face, hair, shoulders, arms, breasts, back, stomach, legs. Everywhere. Soft, supple and succulent.
Her legs wrap around my waist. Finally. I grin as I move back and feel the king size bed behind me. I sit. Still kissing. Still sucking. Still nibbling. Still kissing. "Edward." She moans again. That does me in. I have to have her. Now.
My hands move down her body. Until her clit. I rub. She arches her back, breast to chest. She bites her lips, her eyes hooded. I carry on rubbing until she grabs hold of me. Hard. Both of us. I groan out. This is bliss. She starts grinding her hips against mine. Wet. So wet. I want her so bad now.
"I want you." I groan out. She whimpers and grabs me tighter.
"Now." Isabella says fiercely. She lets go and gives me control. She releases me and hands over power.
I kiss between her breasts, up her throat and to her lips. Finally I enter. So tight. So goddamn tight. My hands grip her back and I bring her closer. We rock to our own rhythm. Making our own music. Skins slapping. Rubbing and scratching. Her moans and my groans. Our sweet beautiful music. Up and down. Over and over.
I make eye contact with her. Intense. Her trilby is still on. I harden inside her. Mine, mine, mine.
I have her in my arms and I'm finally at peace. She cries out my name. I whisper hers. Together. So consumed in each other. I have her in my arms, the girl I have been fantasising over for so long, the girl who has me weak at my knees with just a flick of the hair, the girl that controls me with just a touch. Together. Finally.
Bella Edward Cullen. I always knew he would be like this.
There was tough shit about him around campus. He's apparently rough, handsome, hostile, charming, foe, friend, slut, lover. Who isn't? I had never met him so I chose to ignore the crap. Not my business. Until now. I still don't care. I should but I don't. Emmett will be pissed. He hates him. Fuck Emmett. I'm my own person and I'll do what I like. And if that includes screwing the local screw then so be it. My cousin can't stop me. I need this. I need this to forget the shit in my life.
We pant out in deep breaths as we finish together. It was so intense. Never before have I felt such a strong connection with someone. Physically and emotionally. It was amazing, scary, bewildering and just plain perfect.
We lay on the bed. My head on his chest as we calm down. We breathe together, softly and comfortably.
I remember what he said before. "How long have you known me?"
He blushes. It's adorable. He's adorable. "A month. I was in your English class."
Hmmm. I move closer. "I like you."
His grin widens. "I like you too. A lot."
"I'm tired." I yawn. His hands run through my hair and it's relaxing. My eyes close slowly. Soothing, his special hands.
"Edward." I mumble out before the darkness befalls me.
Edward I wake up as dawn begins to appear. I'm confused by my surroundings. This wasn't my bed. This wasn't even my dorm. And I'm naked. Then I remember last night. Best fucking night of my entire life.
Look beside me. Empty. Nobody. I feel disappointment and distress run through me. She left. Bella left. Isabella left. I guess I knew this would happen. One night stand. That's all I usually am. Thought she was different. Guess not.
I get up and get dressed. The party downstairs is over but the music is still playing over and over again. Joy Division. Love does fucking tear you apart.
I made my way to the door. I stop. There hanging off the handle is a black trilby. Pinned to it is a piece of scrap paper with eleven digits.
I can't help the shit eating grin across my face. Isabella Marie Swan.
Rock 'n' Roll.
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