Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters and tried very hard to keep consistent with bits and pieces that were revealed throughout the series. This is *my interpretation* of what John went through. Comments and constructive criticism are appreciated, elitist fan-raging is not. Kthxbai. 3


John Winchester tossed and turned in his sleep plagued with relentless memories.

The fires of hell roared furiously from the ceiling in pulsing waves from a pale form that grew more unrecognizable by the second. His beloved Mary was centered in the middle of the blaze, her limbs contorted as if gravity had been reversed, and her once lovely mouth open in an unending wordless scream. Her blue-green eyes were glazed and empty as the fires licked the remaining color from her bloodless face.

He tried to get to her but each move forward seemed to emanate another pulse of flames from her form. He held up his arm against the snarl of flames and was forced to look away. A dark cloud of smoke engulfed him and a deep voice rang maniacal laughter in his head as he blacked out.

John woke from the recurring nightmare with a start. Sweat perspired from his forehead and dripped down the side of his rugged face into the prickly forest of stubble at his jaw. He took a moment to catch his breath and wipe the sweat away with the back of his hand. His mouth tasted of bad decisions- a mix of strong alcohols, sleep, and cheap fast food. No matter how much he drank, he couldn't erase the memory of Mary's death. The tragic stepping stone that sent him on this path of revenge.