Trauma


The war is over. Eggman's gone. Infinite's probably dead. The world I knew has a chance to come back. The fields I once ran across, without any cares in the world… that dream is alive again.

So why do I feel so dead?

…I've thought about it. And… I know why.

But I don't like to think about it. During the war against Eggman… I guess I just kept it all sealed up in myself. I just… suppressed it. The world needed Sonic the Hedgehog then. I couldn't let any stupid… feelings get in the way of stopping Eggman.

…Great, now I'm starting to sound like Shadow.

Shadow… that name brought back memories… he and I have a bit of an interesting past together… but I think even he knew something was wrong with me.

Six months of torture kinda messes a guy up. Especially when one of the guys torturing you was someone you thought was a close friend.

I try not to say anything… I try not to bother other people with little stuff like this. I mean… Knuckles would never let me live down the idea of getting emotional from just getting beat up a bit, right?

But someone figured me out today.


*knock knock*

Someone was knocking on my door. That was obvious. Sure, it was 2 in the afternoon, but I think it's fair for the guy who saved the entire planet from Eggman to get a break, right?

"Sonic? You OK?"

Ugh… Amy. I did NOT want to deal with Amy today. True, I appreciate that she's not really as obsessive over me anymore… but one thing she's good at is reading people. And at the moment, I had a giant neon sign on my head screaming "I am totally screwed up right now."

"Tails and Knuckles and I were planning to go on a picnic today. Granted, I have to drag that silly echidna into this, but he has fun in the end anyways. So… I wanted to ask… maybe you want to come?" Amy asked.

"Amy… can I just sleep in?!" I shouted from the couch I laid on, not wanting to even get up.

"At 2 in the afternoon? Sonic, at this point, you're usually running through the fields and pissing off that old man that tries to shoot at you every time you get on his property."

Normally, that would get a laugh out of me… but not today. I sighed. "Go have fun without me. I just… want to be alone."

"…Sonic? You've seemed rather… withdrawn lately. You're usually so social and outgoing, but you've been cooped up in here since pretty much the day the war ended. I… I don't like seeing you like this. Is something bothering you?"

She read me like a card. No point in trying to deny it now. "Just come in." I muttered.

I could see Amy from where I had decided to just lay down. She had seemed to be kinda shocked at the state of my house. Sure, it kinda went to hell when the war began, but Silver had offered to clean it up as thanks for saving the world. So it was nice and tidy… and then it went to hell again within two weeks.

"Sonic? This place is a mess! Somehow it looks even WORSE than before Silver cleaned it up!"

"Come on, Amy. You know I'm not exactly the cleanest guy around." I muttered, cozying up on the couch.

"This is different." She told me, walking over to sit down on a nearby chair. "This isn't how you usually keep a house. Dirty with clothes and dirt strewn about, but it was at least recognizable. But now though… it looks like everything's just been… ignored. Neglected."

"Suppose the windows match the curtains, then." I sighed.

"…Something's definitely bothering you." Amy was able to easily deduce. "Something really major."

"I… guess so…" I muttered, not wanting to make a deal out of it.

She frowned. "…Is this about the war?"

I grumbled to myself, trying to pull myself under the covers. "The world needed Sonic the Hedgehog THEN. It doesn't need Sonic the Hedgehog NOW."

"You're right. The world doesn't need Sonic the Hedgehog right now."

My eyes widened, surprised as I sat up to listen to her. "…Really?"

"Yes. But… I think the world… or perhaps more accurately, your friends… want Sonic back. Just… regular old Sonic. That's the guy Tails wants back. Who Knuckles wants back. Who I want back. Heck, who Shadow wants back."

"…Shadow, of all people?" I said in disbelief.

"Even he knows something's wrong with you. To be honest, he probably already has whatever it is figured out. Shadow's… clever like that."

I slightly chuckled. "I suppose that's one thing that old faker has over me."

Amy smiled. "You see? There's a bit of the Sonic I want back."

I sighed again. "That Sonic was gone a long time ago. That Sonic isn't coming back. That Sonic never had any friends rescue him for six months! That Sonic was broken over his six months in torture!"

Amy looked rather guilt-stricken when I had said that. "We… we all thought you were dead, Sonic."

"Did you never LOOK?!" I shouted at her. Something inside me… I don't know what, but something inside me just snapped.

"We didn't know WHERE to look." She tried to explain. "You had disappeared after Infinite's first attack on you…"

"Did Eggman's base SOMEHOW not come up in your mind? You know, the guy who TOOK OVER THE WORLD?!"

Amy sighed again. "We could barely survive on our own, Sonic. Everything was hopeless for us during those six months. And… we didn't know Eggman had rebuilt the Death Egg. If we had known you were alive… I think we would have spent every single resource we had looking for you."

I tried to fight the tears starting to form in my eyes. "Like it matters anymore. All that matters is that I'm fine and dandy and TOTALLY able to shrug off six months of torture because I'm Sonic the freaking Hedgehog!"

Amy shook her head. "I know you're trying to suppress everything that happened to you… and I'll be the first to admit that I don't have all of the details of what happened up there… but six months of torture isn't something you can just shrug off, Sonic."

"Why not? I was able to do it when the world needed Sonic the Hedgehog."

"You said it yourself, Sonic. The world needed Sonic the Hedgehog THEN. It doesn't need Sonic the Hedgehog NOW. But because the world doesn't need you right now… I think you need to be able to let a lot of those emotions out."

I was taking heavy breaths, barely holding myself back. "You… You promise not to tell anyone about this?"

"I promise, Sonic. Not until you're ready."

The last restraint holding my emotions back broke apart at that moment, grabbing Amy in a hug tightly.

"W-W-Why?! Why me?! Why did I have to g-go through a-all of th-ha-ha-haaaaat?! M-My body still hurts f-from all of their punches… kicks… bites… f-for SO LONG?! I-I still see I-Infinite abusing me in my d-dreams!"

I just heaved and sobbed into Amy's shoulders, crying out in a way that I never had before. I heaved and sobbed and choked and cried for what felt like an eternity. By the time I had the chance to recuperate from the constant sobbing, I saw that Amy's shoulders was SOAKED in my own tears.

"S-Sorry about your dress, Amy." I said as I shook, the memories still haunting me.

"It's OK, Sonic. It's good that you were able to get that out." Amy said, as if… happy that I did so?

"I guess… I guess I feel a little better." I admitted.

"It's not going to be an easy journey recovering from that, Sonic. And while I can comfort you, there's only so much I can do. I know you might not like the idea, but I want…"

"…you want me to go see a therapist because I'm screwed up. D-Do you know how STUPID that sounds? Sonic the Hedgehog seeing a THERAPIST?!"

"Sonic, I more than know someone skilled in the profession that can help you and keep this very confidential. You know her too. Vanilla the Rabbit."

I blinked for a moment. "C-Cream's mom? Wouldn't that be kinda weird?"

"She's qualified, Sonic. And I don't think she'd even charge anything given that you've helped Cream out a couple of times."

"How did you even know she was a therapist?" I said in a bit of confusion.

"Before the war, and even during it, I'd visit her along with Vector. The both of us would take some time off the war efforts to do so, which she seemed to appreciate. And well, I found one of her degrees hanging in her bedroom."

"Oh." I muttered. "…You think that's why Cream always seems to be so… full of spirit?"

"Yeah. For such a young girl, Cream's pretty healthy. I think a lot of has to do with how approachable Vanilla is. If Cream feels like she talk to her about anything… then I feel like Vanilla would be more than happy to listen to you." Amy smiled, hugging me back.

I was silent for a while. "…Amy?"

"Yeah?"

"Thank you."


Sonic the Hedgehog (c) SEGA

So, this is a bit different. My first (and maybe only) Sonic fanfiction. A very, VERY long time ago, I swore that I'd never write Sonic fanfiction... but I guess everyone can change their minds.

Anyway, this is mainly focused on Sonic emotionally dealing with the trauma that would MOST CERTAINLY RESULT from six months of torture. Personally, I think the game wasted a lot of potential (especially on Infinite), but this hopefully pick up something interesting out of the ashes.

As always, read and review/comment.