He's not home again. It's the fourth night in a row and he's not home; he should be home.

I called him.

No answer and straight to voicemail.

"Hey, it's me. I was wondering if you were coming home tonight. I just put the kids to bed and they were disappointed again you weren't home. Let me know what your plans are tonight. I... I love you."

I hung up and headed into the kitchen to put the dinner I made away. I made Derek a plate just in case he did show up hungry and wrapped it up with saran wrap before placing it in the fridge.

I waited up for my husband to walk through the front door or even for a simple phone call saying, 'Sorry, honey, I have to stay monitoring a patient tonight. I'll see you and the kids tomorrow'. Even a text would have been fine.

I checked my phone to make sure I didn't have it on silent by accident. But no; nothing.

There was nothing.

I finally went to bed a little pass midnight. I hoped I'd wake up in the morning finding him beside me.

No.

The bed was empty.

Again.

After feeding my kids breakfast, I decided to drive to the hospital since Derek obviously forgot he has a family at home he should be with. I held both my children's hands as we walked into the hospital. I went up to the surgical floor and saw one of Derek's friends, Mark. I walked over to him and asked him if he knew where Derek was. He said no.

"Well if you see him, tell him his wife and children are looking for him." I said. "I'm not leaving until I speak to him."

"Trouble in paradise?" Mark asked.

"Just let him know if you see him." I picked Paisley up and reached for my son's hand. "Come on, Michael. Let's find daddy."

I walked to Derek's office and knocked on it once. I heard my husband's voice shout come in and I surely did. I immediately saw a woman sitting on his couch wearing light blue scrubs who is obviously either an intern or a resident.

"Meredith." Derek stood up. "What are you doing here?"

I asked if the woman in light blue scrubs could give me and my husband some privacy. She left and I answered Derek's question by saying, "You haven't come home for the past four nights. I needed to make sure you were alive and doing well since you won't bother on returning any of your wife's calls."

"I've been busy."

"Too busy to let me know you won't be home?" I asked.

"You're right, I should have called."

I set Paisley down on the floor and pulled Derek to the side of his office so we could talk quieter without having the kids hearing; mainly Michael. "The kids and I haven't seen you in four days, Derek. So just please tell me. Are you cheating on me? Is that where you've been; with another woman?"

"Of course not. You know I love you and the kids."

"Then why the hell haven't you made enough effort to come home? The kids miss you; I've missed you."

"I've been busy." Derek said again.

"Too busy for your family?" I asked. "Being too busy for me is one thing, but for your children, that's another."

He sighed into his hands. "I'll be home tonight, I promise."

"Just forget it. You obviously don't care and maybe I shouldn't either. One day you'll come home to find me and the kids gone and you'll wonder what the hell happened. This; you not making enough effort for us is what happened."

I returned to my children and grabbed both of their hands. "Say bye to daddy, we're leaving."

We exited his office and I saw that same woman who was in there before I came waiting outside the door which made me even more upset than I already was because she was probably eavesdropping. "I thought I told you to give me and my husband some privacy. Waiting outside his door like a lost puppy dog isn't giving us privacy."


Derek came home that night; earlier than he normally did, actually. I hadn't even begun dinner yet it was early.

Derek greeted the kids and gave them a hug. He tried giving me a kiss, but I pushed my face away so he only got cheek. There was obvious tension between us but the fault is all his.

I started dinner an hour and a half later. I made pasta because I didn't feel like going all out for my ungrateful husband. I placed Paisley in her high chair with a bowl of pasta in front of her and Michael sat at the table. I got him a bowl as well and made myself a plate once I had my kids all set. Derek joined us minutes later and sat down across from me.

"The meal is delicious tonight, Mer." Derek said.

"You would have liked the previous nights' just as much then." I looked over at Paisley and sighed when I saw how big of a mess she is. "Pais, the food is meant to go in you not on you."

I took Paisley and Michael upstairs to give them a bath after dinner. I asked Derek to put the food away and the dishes in the dishwasher while I did that. After giving them a bath, I got them into their pajamas and put them to bed. I went back downstairs to make sure Derek did what I asked for and he did. This was the least he could do being that I've been taking care of his children and house all on my own.

I went upstairs to get ready for bed myself. I took my makeup off, brushed my teeth, got into my pajamas, and climbed into bed. I reached for my book I've been reading and turned to the page where I left off. Derek came up later and sat down on the bed to take off his shoes. He undid his belt and loosened his shirt before he changed himself.

"Meredith."

"I don't want to talk about this tonight. I'm exhausted."

Derek took his shirt off and traded his black slacks for pajama pants. "Mer, baby, there's no one else."

I scoffed. "That's hard to believe."

"You know I've been busy with my brain mapping project."

"I don't know what you've been too busy for your family with anymore. The only thing I know is that the kids need you, Derek, and you haven't been around. Michael used to ask me when is daddy coming home; now he asks is daddy coming home tonight? And Paisley; I don't even think she knows who you are. How do you think that makes me feel as their mother?" I closed my book. "I was serious when I said one day you'll come home and find me and the kids gone. You need to put as above your brain mapping project. You need to make coming home each night a priority or at least let me know when you're staying at the hospital and even still limit it to two nights a week."

"Okay."

"Just okay?" I reached over and turned my beside lamp off. "I'm going to sleep."

I slept with my back turned to my husband that entire night.

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