I know that Valentine's Day has passed, but I wanted to share this one-shot anyways! Thank you and enjoy :)
Lost Valentine
4:30am
"Today is the day," he told his reflection in the mirror.
There's no turning back. He's finally going to ask her out. They've been on friendly terms for years. She comes to the bakery at the same time every week. Always when he works the front. They exchange pleasantries and shy smiles, but never anything more. Of course he sees her at school everyday. But he is always by her. Or, at least he was always by her. He hasn't seen Hawthorne glued to her side for months!
"Peeta!" A loud shout came from the bathroom door. "Are you almost done in there? We need you downstairs!"
"Be right there," Peeta shouted back.
He takes a deep breath as he continued to stare at his reflection. "You can do it. You CAN ask her. Today," he whispered to himself. With that, he splashed cold water on his face and finished getting ready for the day.
Today is the day!
5:00am
"This is it. Today is the day," she whispered to her reflection in the mirror. She's going to do it. She's going to tell him how she feels… Maybe. Maybe she will tell him. It's not weird, is it? To be the one to initiate? Isn't the boy supposed to ask the girl, not the other way around? She's pretty sure she is supposed to wait for him to make the first move. But what if he doesn't? What if he doesn't feel the same? Every girl in their grade likes him. He seems to always be surrounded by blonde-haired and blue-eyed girls from town. They're all gorgeous, of course. What could a boy like him possibly see in a girl from the Seam. She isn't very big or particularly pretty. She wasn't even sure she could have feelings for him until last week at the bakery…
"Katniss, honey? Are you in there?" she heard her mom call out from behind the bathroom door.
"Yes, mom. I'll be right out." She sighed. She took one more glance at her Seam eyes and black hair. Maybe today isn't the day afterall.
She opened the door to find her mother waiting for her on the other side. She only had a moment to wonder why her mother is up so early before she noticed the paper in her hand. Oh no…
"Where did you find that?" she hissed as she snatched the paper from her mother. No one was supposed to see this! "Why are you going through my things? Don't I get any privacy?" The nerve! "Why are you up so early anyways," Katniss said as she continued her tirade. "Don't you have something else you could be doing besides spying on your daughter?'
"Katniss, stop. I was NOT snooping. It was on the table when I got home. I was out delivering the Jones baby, remember?" her mom explained.
Oh yeah, she thought. Her mom had left her a note. Embarrassed by her outburst, she murmured an apology before trying to side step her mom. But her mom was having none of it. Apparently Paisley Everdeen was in a mothering mood.
"Wait, Katniss. I would like to talk to you about this, if that's ok?"
Katniss stopped in her tracks and looked at her mother. She looked exhausted with dark circles under her eyes. But there's something else there. She looked almost nervous.
"Maybe I can help?" Paisley said to Katniss, her voice a touch stronger than her soft spoken request moments before.
"No, mom. I don't need any help. I need to go hunting." Katniss again tried to move around her mother. She made it to the kitchen before her mom spoke again.
"Is it Gale? Is that who this is about?" she asked as she gestures towards the now crumbled paper in Katniss' hands.
Gale. Of course she would assume it was about Gale. Everyone seems to think there is something going on between them. She gazes at the paper while answering, "no. It's not about Gale." Her voice was barely above a whisper. She stole a glance at her mom as a look of relief quickly passed over her face. Paisley straightened her back and lifted her chin, as if coming to a decision. She took Katniss by the hand and guided her to the kitchen table. She gestured for Katniss to sit down and went to the cabinet to take down two mugs. She must have put the kettle on when she got home, Katniss noticed. Once the tea is poured and a mug sits in front of mother and daughter, Paisley finally spoke.
"Listen Katniss. I know I haven't been the best mother to you and Primrose. I know that I have let you down. But I am here now. I can't take back the past. I can, however, do my best to help you now. We have enough food and supplies to last a few days. So I know you don't need to go hunting right now."
She reached over and took the paper in Katniss' hand. She smoothed it out and gave her a pointed look.
"Will you please tell me what this is about? And together, maybe we can come to a solution?"
Paisley sat patiently, sipping her tea, waiting for Katniss to answer.
Katniss slumped her shoulders in defeat. No one was supposed to see that letter. She actually had meant to throw it in the fire. She took a sip of her tea to buy her some time. What could it hurt, sharing this with her mom? She's certainly confused enough. Outside perspective might actually be helpful.
"Fine. But mom, this stays between us, okay? Please don't share this with anyone."
"Of course."
"The letter is about… it's about Peeta. Peeta Mellark."
Katniss blushed furiously. She gulped down her tea, even though it was too hot, to avoid looking at her mom.
"Peeta? Is that Bryer's youngest?"
Katniss nodded her head, still avoiding eye contact.
"Why don't you start at the beginning," Paisley said as she hid a smile behind her mug.
And so she did. She told Paisley about the bread that saved them after her father died, and the bruise Peeta had the next day. She told her about their chats. She also talked about the stolen glances she catches, and how he seems to always look for her before his wrestling matches. She went on to speak of his kindness to everyone, Seam and town alike. By the time Katniss is finished, she realized she hasn't said this much to her mother in years. While it's good to get everything off her chest, she's still a little embarrassed and uncomfortable.
"It sounds to me like you are quite taken with this young man."
"I am. I never wanted to feel this way about anyone. I never thought I could feel this way."
"Does he feel the same way?"
Katniss grimaced at the question. "I have no idea," she admitted. "But, I um. I think he might."
"What are you going to do about it?" her mom asked.
"Wh-what?" Katniss stammers, unused to her mother's directness.
Paisley reached over and placed her hand over Katniss' and squeezed gently.
"Sweetheart. It is obvious you have strong feelings for him. I know how hard your father's death was on you, especially since I wasn't here to help. I have watched you put up a wall around yourself to keep people out. But this boy, Peeta, seems to have wormed his way past that wall. It would take someone incredibly special to do that."
"He is special," Katniss whispered.
"But," Paisley probed.
"But, I don't know what to do. I wanted to tell him today. Every day for the last week, actually. Or I thought I did. I had thought I worked up the courage. But, it's weird, right? I mean, shouldn't the boy be the one to initiate? Besides, he's one of the most popular boys in town. He has no shortage of options. I'm just another girl from the Seam. I wish Dad were here. He would know what to do," Katniss muttered in defeat.
"Well," Paisley started. "I can tell you if your father were still here, he would tell you to follow your heart. He would tell you not to be afraid of taking a chance because the never knowing and regret is worse than rejection. He would also hold your face in his hands, look you straight in the eye, and tell you that you, Katniss Everdeen, are beautiful. And any boy who catches your attention would be a fool not to pursue you. Those town girls have nothing on you, sweetheart."
Katniss cleared her throat and fought back the tears that started to form. That was something her father would say. He never wanted her to be afraid of anything, or anyone.
"I want to tell him. I want to know if he feels the same. But I don't know how to do that without making a fool of myself. I get tongue-tied when I'm around him lately."
"Well, why not give him this," Paisley suggested.
"NO!" Katniss practically shouted. She grabbed the letter and threw it into the fireplace before she could think about it too much.
"Why did you do that Katniss?" Paisley asked, a little startled by her daughter's abrupt behavior.
"That letter was too raw. I wrote it as a way to get my feelings out, not to share it with anyone."
"Alright," Paisley said slowly. "If that letter was too raw for you, what about an abridged version?"
"You could send him a Valentine!"
Paisley and Katniss both jumped at the sound of Prim's voice.
"What are you talking about Prim, and how long have you been standing there?" Katniss' voice grew higher with each word as she realized Prim overheard most of her conversation.
Prim smirked as she answered, "Long enough."
Katniss forgot that Prim also gets up early to tend to her goat, Lady.
"Prim, please-"
"I'm not going to say anything Katniss," Prim interrupted. "You know me better than that."
Katniss let out a breath she'd been holding. She does know better. Prim was like a vault when it comes to secrets.
"You're right, Prim. I'm sorry."
"You should be," Prim said with a cheeky smile. "Are you finally going to tell Peeta you're in love with him?"
Katniss blushed. Again. This was starting to become an annoying habit.
"What, what do you mean 'finally' tell him?"
Prim rolled her eyes. "Please Katniss. I've been watching you watch him for years. And I've been watching him watch you longer than that. It's about time one of you said something."
Katniss was flabbergasted. She felt like a fish the way she kept opening and closing her mouth.
"What was the thing you mentioned, Prim?" Paisley asked, taking the spotlight off her oldest daughter.
"Oh. A Valentine?" Prim asked as she moved around the kitchen gathering her supplies to milk Lady.
"Everyone gets one Valentine to send to someone else. It's new this year. Some kind of initiative from the Capitol to bring cheer, color, and happiness or some such to the districts. Since today is Valentine's Day, the supposed 'Day of Love', they came up with a way to share the love, I guess. Anyways, we all get our Valentines during our first class. We can address it to whomever we choose, then we write a note inside of it, and turn it back in so it can be delivered after lunch. I know you were going to send yours to me, Katniss, but you should definitely send it Peeta instead!"
Without waiting for a response, Prim finished her explanation and walked out the door towards Lady's pen.
"Did you know about those Valentine things, Katniss?"
Katniss nodded. She did indeed know about them.
"Yes. Prim is right, though. I was going to send mine to her." It didn't even occur to her to send hers to Peeta.
Paisley smiled. "Why don't you send it to Peeta instead? Keep it simple, not too deep."
Katniss thought it over. It certainly would be easier to send him a Valentine then trying to tell him to his face… stumbling over her words, not knowing what to say…
"It might be ok." Katniss said slowly as she thought about what she would write.
"What are you going to wear?" Prim asked as she pranced through the door.
Katniss frowned at her sister. Prim had always been the more girly of the two. Katniss preferred comfort and functionality to fashion and trend. Prim, however, was the exact opposite. She preferred dresses and skirts and "cute" things. The only "cute" things Katniss wears comes from one of her hunts.
Upon looking at her sister's scowl, Prim immediately stopped what she was doing and gaped at Katniss. "You're not going to wear that, are you?" she asked in horror.
"Of course not!" Katniss said indignantly, looking down at her thin shirt and stretchy sleep pants. "These are pyjamas!"
"Fine. But you are going to dress up, right?" Prim pressed.
"Why would I do that?" Katniss countered.
"You are going to tell the boy you love that you love him, and have been in love with him for years, and you plan on wearing blood stained pants and an old leather jacket?"
"Well, why not? If he likes me at all, then my wardrobe won't be a problem." Katniss crossed her arms and huffed. "Besides, I don't have any fancy clothes that aren't dresses. And it's the middle of winter."
If Katniss was being honest with herself, which she wasn't at the moment, there was a small part of her that wanted to look her best.
"I have just the thing," Paisley interrupted as she stands up from the table.
"What are you talking about mom?" Katniss asked as Paisley left the room. She looked over to Prim and raised her eyebrows in silent question. Prim shook her head, not knowing what was going on either.
When Paisley returned, she was carrying a dusty old box.
"What's that?" Prim asked.
"This is from my time in town, when I was your age Katniss. I held onto these thinking you girls might use them one day. It has been so long though. I don't know what condition they will be in." Paisley opened the box and started sorting through the items.
"Here. This is perfect for you Katniss. I think I wore this once. We might have lucked out, these look like they are in really good shape."
She handed Katniss a dark green dress and black pants looking thing. They were both made of thick wool. I will definitely stay warm in these, she thought. She held up the fake pants and asked "what are these?"
"Those are tights. You wear them under dresses in the winter to keep you warm," her mom explained.
"Really? They look a little small."
Paisley chuckled. "They stretch."
"That outfit is perfect, Katniss. You can wear your leather boots and belt with it too! You washed your hair last night, right? You should wear it down! It will be wavy because of your braid-"
"Whoa Prim, slow down," Katniss interrupted. "I'm not…. I'm not comfortable with the idea of wearing a dress. And I never wear my hair down. I don't know. This seems like too much."
"Will you at least try it on before you completely reject the idea?" Prim pleaded.
"I guess there is no harm in that," Katniss offered.
"Good," Paisley said, squeezing Katniss' shoulder gently. "I'll start breakfast while you get dressed."
Fifteen minutes later, Katniss was shocked. She looked like… herself. She was worried that the outfit would change her appearance in some way. But it didn't. She still looked like her, but a little more feminine. She had to admit, she didn't hate it. It actually gave her a boost of confidence.
"Katniss, breakfast is ready," she heard her mom call.
Here goes nothing, she thought as she made her way to the kitchen. Once there, she was attacked by a blur of blonde hair.
"It's perfect," Prim squealed. "It's like it was made for you." Prim gushed some more as she inspected her sister's outfit. "Will you let me do your hair? Please?" Prim clasped her hands under her chin and batted her eyelashes at her sister.
Katniss looked at her and sighed. Like she would ever be able to say no to her. "Alright. But after we eat."
7:00am
The morning was busier than normal. It seemed like everyone and their mother came in, he thought as he headed to school. Despite the busyness of the bakery, the work was a welcome distraction for Peeta. He could just focus on what was in front of him and not over analyze his plan to ask Katniss Everdeen out. It was the perfect plan. Everyone would be getting a Valentine to give to someone today. When he first heard about the idea of Valentine's Day and exchanging Valentines, he knew it was the perfect opportunity to tell Katniss how he felt about her. How he had always felt about her. He knew he should just man up and tell her to her face. It's not that I am afraid to tell her, he thought to himself. It's just that I am afraid to tell her.
Peeta was so lost in his thoughts that he almost missed her. Katniss Everdeen was wearing a dress. And her hair was down. He's pretty sure he just swallowed his tongue. Katniss had always been beautiful to him. He liked her best when she was wearing her father's old hunting jacket and hunting clothes. She looked natural, ethereal even. But today, she looked breathtaking.
"Close your mouth."
Peeta jumped, startled out of his stupor. His best friend Delly was next to him smirking. When did she get here?
"Morning, Dell," Peeta said clearing his throat.
Her smirk turned into a full grin at his discomfort. "Enjoying the view, Peet?" Delly chirped at his side.
"Shut up Delly," Peeta grumbled, turning three shades of red. He looked down, shoved his hands in his pockets, and continued his walk to school.
Not one to be deterred, Delly caught up to him and pressed on. "Are you finally going to do it today?'
"Do what?" Peeta feigned ignorance.
"Don't play dumb with me, Mellark. It's not a good look on you," Delly said, nudging him in the ribs. "I've known you your whole life. You're wearing your best clothes, and you actually tried to tame the mop on your head." She paused, examining him closer. "You are planning something!" she exclaimed. "And since today is 'The Day of Love', I'm going to go out on a limb and guess that you are going to finally tell her that you're in love with her. Are you going to send her a Valentine?"
Leave it to Delly to cut right to the chase. "If you already know so much Cartwright, why are you asking me?" Peeta retorted playfully.
"Because I wanted to see you turn that lovely shade of red! Oh, wave. Katniss is looking right at you." Delly tried, and failed, to whisper nonchalantly.
Peeta wasn't sure if Katniss was really looking at him, or if Delly was just trying to embarrass him some more. But he couldn't resist, and looked over at Katniss anyways. They were all in the school yard by now. And sure enough, she was looking at him. Their eyes locked, and she blushed slightly and smiled shyly at him. In that moment, only she existed. He couldn't even remember his name.
"Wave, Peeta!" he heard Delly whisper again, shattering his illusion.
He was still dazed, so he numbly lifted his hand and waved. Her blush deepened, and she waved back before quickly disappearing into the school.
"She likes you," Delly taunted over his shoulder.
"Wh-what?"
"Katniss. Likes. You," Delly repeated, putting emphasis on each word. "Which is why you should tell her." She interjected before he could respond. "What are you going to write in your Valentine?"
"I don't know yet." They were standing just outside the school as the other students filed in. They still had a few minutes before the bell rang.
"Liar. You have been in love with her since kindergarten. I wouldn't be surprised if you have an entire speech rehearsed to confess your undying love."
Peeta blushed again. He did know what he wanted to write to Katniss. It was all he could think about in the weeks since learning about Valentine's Day. But there was no way he was going to tell Delly. Fortunately for him, the bell rang.
"Sorry, Dell. I'm late for class." Peeta said with a smile.
"This isn't over, Mellark!" Delly huffed as they walked their separate ways.
7:45am
It's done. There was no turning back now. Peeta wrote his love letter to Katniss, sealed it, and handed it back to the teacher. The Valentines would be passed out after lunch. All he had to do was wait. And still, he was so nervous. His palms were sweaty, and he couldn't stop fidgeting. He had no idea how he was going to get through the day and stay sane.
7:45am
It's done. She did it. At first, she wasn't sure what she would write. But it came to her just in time. She was nervous, but there wasn't anything she could do about it now. All she could do was wait.
12:00pm
Peeta was a wreck. He couldn't believe he actually told Katniss what she meant to him in a Valentine. An old, resurrected tradition that didn't really have meaning to anyone in District 12. He was second-guessing himself all morning. He drove his teachers and classmates mad with his constant fidgeting and pencil tapping. Delly even took away his pencil in one class. She asked him again what he wrote to Katniss. But he wouldn't tell her. What he wrote was for her eyes only.
And now he is sitting in the lunchroom, trying his best not to stare her. But he can't help it. She has him spellbound. All he could think about is today is the day. He would know whether she returned his affections in a few short hours.
12:00pm
Katniss was a mess. She was so nervous. She realized her mistake too late. She was barely able to finish her Valentine to Peeta before she had to seal it and give it back to the teacher. But something felt off. It hit her in her next class that she forgot to sign her name! There was no way for her to fix her mistake now. Once the Valentines were collected, no one was to touch them until they were delivered. Now she didn't know what to do. Peeta would get her Valentine, but he wouldn't know it was from her. He was so well liked, he would probably get several Valentines. He never seemed to lack female attention. Even at this very moment, there were several girls competing for his attention. Not that she could blame them. He was wearing a deep brown, fitted sweater that made his blue eyes even more blue. And he had styled his hair today. She normally liked his blonde curls untamed. But she had to admit, he was rather handsome with them styled…
"You're drooling," Madge whispered to Katniss, snapping her out of her trance.
She looked at Madge with shock.
"I… I am not," she managed.
"Oh yes, yes you are. And I can't blame you. Peeta Mellark is drool-worthy," Madge replied with a wicked grin.
A little surge of jealousy went through Katniss. But then she saw the playful glean in Madge's eye and knew Madge was just giving her a hard time.
Still playing dumb though, she came back with "I don't know what you're talking about."
Madge lightly kicked her shin under the table. "Yes, you do. You were totally checking out Peeta. You haven't been able to keep your eyes off him all day. Usually you're more subtle."
Katniss blanched. "What do you mean by that?"
Madge rolled her eyes. "Exactly that. You've been discreetly following Peeta for years. It is like radar. You always find him in a crowd. You know when he enters a room. It's like you two sense each other. It's kind of sweet."
First, Prim. Now, Madge. And did she just say years? Katniss had barely been able to acknowledge her feelings for Peeta this past week. But apparently everyone else around her knew before she did. Everyone… knew…
"Calm down, Katniss. The entire world doesn't know," Madge spoke softly, ebbing Katniss' panic. "I'm your friend. I know you. Anyone who doesn't know you wouldn't notice. I promise."
Katniss took a deep breath. "Thanks, Madge".
Madge reached over and gently squeezed her hand.
"Of course. Now do you want to tell me what has you so jumpy today? And what's with the dress? You look great, by the way, it's just out of character for you."
Katniss paused for a moment. Madge was her only girlfriend. And she knew anything she told her would stay between them. Truth be told, she was so worried over her anonymous Valentine, she could use some guidance. This day is turning out to be a disaster!
So Katniss caved and told Madge everything. She started with the raw letter she wrote last night, to her conversation with her mom and Prim, their negotiations on her outfit, and the disaster she made of her Valentine. It is probably the most she has ever said in one sitting before. She really wasn't used to sharing so much! She hoped it didn't become a habit.
"Maybe we can tell the office what happened and ask to find your card so you can sign it," Madge suggested.
"I already asked," Katniss responded crestfallen. "They were very clear that no one touches them until they are delivered."
"I'm sorry. But if it's any consolation, I don't think it will matter."
"What do you mean? Of course it matters," Katniss protested.
"What I mean is, this will all work out. Valentine or not."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because Peeta can't keep his eyes off you either," Madge smirked.
"Really," Katniss asked, a light flush rising on her cheeks.
At that moment, her eyes involuntarily searched for Peeta. Sure enough, he was looking at her. When their eyes met this time, her heart skipped a beat, she had butterflies in her stomach, and she could hardly breathe. Neither broke eye contact this time. They probably could have stayed that way indefinitely, but the connection was broken when the bell rang. Before he got up from the table though, Peeta gave Katniss the most beautiful smile, which she shyly returned. Maybe everything will work out, she thought.
1:30pm
Peeta felt like he had a lead weight in his stomach. He couldn't remember ever feeling so nervous. Not even before the wrestling championship. The Valentines were supposed to be delivered any minute. For all he knew, Katniss was reading it at this very moment.
He hoped that asking her to meet after school by the old tree wasn't too forward.
"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" shouted a man from the door, startling Peeta and the rest of the class. It was one of the men from the Capitol that came to oversee the facilitation of new holidays the Capitol introduces. He was wearing a dark blue suit with blinking lights. His hair was colored a light blue. His eyelids and lips were also dyed to match. This must be the latest trend in the Capitol.
"I'll only be a few minutes," he said as he started calling out students' names in his odd Capitol accent.
"Carey Silver."
"Glenn Coco."
"Jackie Donaldson."
"Peeta Mellark."
Peeta froze. There was one for him? Could it be…
"Is there a Peeta Mellark in this class?" the man asked again.
"Um, ya. That's me," Peeta said raising his hand.
The man handed him a bright red envelope. He stared at in shock. He did not recognize the handwriting and was hesitant to open it.
Who could have sent this? He thought again. He had been so focused on sending Katniss one that he didn't even consider someone would send him one. His heart started racing, and he got butterflies in his stomach. Maybe it's from her, was his last thought before he turned the envelope over and slid his index finger under the seal. He pulled a bright pink heart-shaped paper out of the envelope. His eyes instantly went to the bottom. There was no signature. Hmmmm, he thought before flipping it over. There isn't a signature here either. He huffed a slight sigh of disappointment as he started to read.
Dear Peeta…
1:30pm
This was it. This was the period the Valentines would be handed out. Not that it mattered much. Peeta would get hers, but he wouldn't know it was from her. Just her luck, one of the townie girls from his fan club would take credit for it! Ugh. She hated those girls. They followed him around everywhere, always trying to get his attention. They don't care about him. They just want a cushy life as a baker's wife. That is if he decided to stay…
"Ouch!" Katniss grunted as Madge kicked her foot. She really needs to stop doing that. The teacher cleared his throat and gave Katniss a pointed look, silently admonishing her outburst. Katniss nodded in acknowledgement and apology. As soon as the teacher focused on something else, Katniss shot Madge a glare. Madge, however, wasn't paying attention. She was pretending to look in her microscope. Before Katniss turned away though, Madge subtly tapped her notebook. There was a folded piece of paper on her lab sheet.
Katniss discreetly slide it to her work station and opened it. It had one word on it.
Spill
Spill? What on Earth was Madge even talking about? She wrote a question mark and continued with her work. A few minutes later, Madge tapped her foot again. Lightly this time. Sneaking a glance at the teacher, Katniss opened up the note again.
Since I didn't have the chance to ask you at lunch, what's changed. You may have "secretly" admired him for years, but you never acted on it. You've even mentioned several times that you never wanted a relationship, never wanted to marry. So what changed? Why now?
Katniss hesitated for only a moment before she started to write. She'd come this far. She might as well keep going.
I went to the bakery last week to trade. The back door was open and I overheard Peeta saying he was going to leave District 12 after graduation because there is no work for him here. And it hit me. I couldn't stand the thought of not seeing him again. And then it was like a light was switched on. I realized I felt something for him and would regret it if he left, and I never told him.
Katniss folded the paper and passed it back to Madge.
"WHAT?" hollered Madge, attracting the entire class' attention.
"Is there a problem, Miss Undersee?" the teacher asked, not bothering to hide his annoyance.
"Oh. Um. No. No, sir. I'm sorry. It won't happen again," Madge stammered.
"See that it doesn't," their teacher snapped.
Madge wasted no time writing her response and passing it to Katniss.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE'S LEAVING? WHAT ABOUT THE BAKERY? WHAT ELSE DID YOU HEAR?
You can't say anything to anyone, okay?
Promise. It's in the vault.
If Whit doesn't land the apprenticeship with the grocer, he will stay with the bakery. There isn't enough room for all the Mellark brothers to work and support future families. Peeta would have to relocate to a different district. At least that's what I overheard them talking about.
But, why? He has more talent than his brothers and Mr. Mellark combined!
C'mon Madge. You know there are few jobs in town. His other option is the mines. He doesn't belong there.
"HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!" chirped a woman that just burst through the door. She had a scary white grin, bright pink hair, and a green suit. She looked ridiculous.
"Don't mind me," she said in her high pitched Capitol accent. "I'll only be a moment."
"Wanda Rogers."
"Angel Reed."
"Katniss Everdeen."
Katniss and Madge exchanged a glance, their note forgotten.
"Here," Katniss said, and the woman handed her the Valentine.
"Open it," Madge said.
"Who would send me one?" Katniss replied.
Madge rolled her eyes, snatching the envelope from her. She opened it and handed the card to Katniss. "There is only one way to find out."
Dear Katniss…
1:40pm
Dear Peeta,
You're a painter. You're a baker. You like to sleep with your windows open. You never take sugar in your tea. You always double-knot your shoelaces. Your favorite color is orange, like a sunset. And you've won my heart. Please stay.
Please stay. He read the Valentine over and over. But those two words stood out to him more than anything else. Who knew he was thinking about leaving? He hadn't told anyone, not even his dad. Then he remembered. Last week while he and Whit were alone in the back of the bakery, he mentioned leaving District 12. The bakery weren't big enough to support all three Mellark boys. Not to mention any family they might have. If neither of his brothers found a job somewhere else in town, he would have two choices: the mines or another district. That's what he was telling his brother. He only ever said it out loud once! And since this Valentine was obviously NOT from his brother, who could it be from?
Before he could ponder further, the bell rang. He hadn't heard a word his teacher said. He hoped he didn't have a test tomorrow!
"Hey Peeta."
Peeta looked up from zipping his backpack to see Laney Davenport standing at his desk.
"Oh. Hi Laney," Peeta said. Laney was the butcher's daughter. She usually clung to him like glue. He wished she would get the hint and realize he wasn't interested.
"I see you got my Valentine…"
1:40pm
Dear Katniss,
There is something I need to tell you. Meet me by the old tree after school.
It's not signed. Who would send her a Valentine and not sign it?
"Ahem," Madge cleared her throat impatiently.
Katniss slid the card over and focused her attention on her assignment. After a minute, Madge passed it back. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Madge write something on their note paper.
So, are you going to meet him there?
Confused, Katniss furrowed her bows.
Meet who where?
Madge rolled her eyes so hard it looked like she hurt herself.
The Valentine you just got Katniss! He is asking you to meet to tell you something. Are you going to do it?
Oh, right.
I don't know. Who would I be meeting. It's not signed.
It's obviously Peeta. He probably wants to ask you to be his girlfriend. And big deal if it's not signed. You didn't sign yours to him, remember?
Katniss supposed that was one way to look at it. She did want to see Peeta. But something about that note felt off. It didn't seem like something Peeta would write.
Yes, I will. Will you wait with me? Just till he shows up? Please?
You don't even have to ask
The bell rang, stopping their note passing. Katniss didn't think they got any work done. That just means she'll have to work twice as hard tomorrow to catch up. Oh well. It felt good opening up to Madge. It was a welcome distraction. She only had one class left until school was over.
2:35pm
"Stop fidgeting. You're going to mess up your hair."
Katniss and Madge were by the old tree. They had only just arrived, and Katniss was already restless. She met up with Madge after the final bell, and Madge insisted they go to the girls' room to freshen up. Katniss put up a fuss-what was "freshening up" and why did she have to do it?-but eventually gave in. She had splashed water on her face, and Madge smoothed out her hair. Madge had then deemed her ready, even though Katniss thought she looked the same as she did a few minutes before.
Now the girls were waiting patiently. The last few minutes have been excruciating. She was ready to face this head on.
"Katniss?" She heard a familiar voice behind her and froze.
"What are you doing here?" Katniss asked as she turned around.
"I, um, asked you to meet me here. Didn't you get my Valentine?"
Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no! This can't be happening. Why is this happening?
"You sent me that?" Katniss barely managed around the lump that had formed in her throat.
"Uh, ya. Who did you think it was from?"
"Sorry Gale. It, it wasn't signed. That's all. I'm just a little surprised. I mean you don't even go to school here anymore."
This was turning into a nightmare. Gale started working in the school as part of some Capitol program. They wanted to improve the schools or something like that. He was selected at random, as were a few others, to pour over the curriculum and offer improvements. He was reluctant at first, but anything was better than the mines. And the pay was definitely better.
Unfortunately, he has also been acting strangely. He started mentioning settling down, getting married, having kids. He was making more than enough with his new job to support his mom, brothers, and sister. Apparently, he also had enough to support a wife. Katniss wasn't sure why he was bringing all that up to her. He also started spending more time at her house after their hunting days. He would make small repairs around her house, too. He wanted to spend time in the forest just talking. He looked for any reason to touch her or get close to her.
At first, she indulged him. He was just so happy. She didn't want to take that away from him. But after awhile, she felt like everything had an expectation with it. One she had no intention of filling. So she created space. She filled her weekends with homework and chores. She hunted early in the morning when she knew he would be busy. She stopped walking with him to and from school. What encounters they did have, she limited to hunting and trading. Rumors were floating around that he had been seen at the slag heap recently. She hoped he had taken the hint. He may have been her best friend at one time, but that didn't mean she wanted more.
But clearly he did.
"I know. But they let everyone participate, even the faculty," he said looking a little agitated. "Can you give us a minute? I'd like to talk to Catnip alone," he said, apparently just realizing that Madge was standing there as well.
She raised her eyebrows in silent question. Katniss nodded.
"I'll , uh, see you tomorrow, Madge."
Not convinced she should leave, Madge wrapped Katniss in a hug and whispered in her ear, "you sure you'll be alright?"
Katniss gave Madge a slight squeeze as her answer.
"Bye Katniss. Good-bye Gale," and with that, Madge started walking home.
"Why did you want to meet me here Gale? And why did you ask me through a note?" Katniss turned on him as soon as Madge was out of earshot.
Gale took a deep breath and reached for her hand. He stepped closer to her and looked deeply in her eyes.
"I've wanted to do this for a long time," he said as he leaned in to kiss her.
2:40pm
Peeta was late. He had wanted to get to the tree as soon as the bell rang. But he was caught up with Laney.
She was in his last two classes for the day. And while she claims she sent him the Valentine, he didn't quite believe her. No, the person who wrote it paid attention to him. She noticed things about him his own family didn't even notice. She also knew about his possible relocation.
Laney was the biggest gossip in his grade. If she wrote the Valentine and knew of his plans, the entire district would know by now too.
When Peeta neither confirmed nor denied her inquiry, she became ruthless. She obviously knew he received one, and she demanded to know who sent it. He politely told her it was none of her business. But she still persisted. All the way to their next class. It was an art class, so they had a little freedom to talk, so long as their assignments were completed. He was able to dodge her and keep her at bay for most of the period. But he finally lost his patience with her when she boldly claimed that it didn't matter who sent it. Their parents (mothers) had an arrangement between them. They were going to be married after graduation, whether he liked it or not.
When the final bell rang, he grabbed her hand and took her to the gym to talk privately. She obviously misread the situation because as soon as the door closed, her arms were around his neck, and she tried to kiss him. He broke the embrace before she could, and told her in no uncertain terms that he was absolutely NOT marrying her. Ever. He apologized and told her he tried letting her down easy, but enough was enough.
He wasn't sure what he expected her to do, but he didn't expect her to slap him. He usually can tell when someone is about to hit him.
He went to the boys' room to examine the damage. He splashed cold water on his face hoping to reduce the swelling. It didn't help much. The swelling would go down eventually, and fortunately it wouldn't leave a mark. But now he was late meeting Katniss. He hoped she decided to meet him, to give them a chance. And if she did show, he hoped she would forgive him for being late and making her wait.
He was smoothing down his hair as he turned the corner, and the old tree came into view. He saw Katniss and his heart skipped a beat, like it always did when he saw her. He couldn't believe she was there. He was elated. She's really there! She does have feelings for me! He thought. But in the next moment, he felt like the wind had been knocked out of him. Gale was there. He didn't notice him right away. But he did now because he was holding her hand and leaning in to kiss her…
Peeta couldn't watch. He turned around and started walking to the bakery. He felt completely foolish. Why would she have feelings for him when she has Gale? His feelings were moot at this point. He realized he was pining for a girl he would never have.
Crushed, he dove into his work when he reached the bakery. His brothers were either out on deliveries or meandering about the district, his dad was in the front, and his mother was in the office. He was left to his own devices. He was grateful for that because he didn't have to face anyone just yet. He wasn't sure he could handle it.
Today was the day alright. The day his heart was broken by the girl he loved.
2:45pm
Katniss panicked and froze as Gale leaned in. She didn't want this. She didn't want him.
Before his lips touched hers, she backed away.
"No, Gale. No," she said in a voice as stern as she could muster.
"What do you mean, 'no'. What are you talking about Catnip? I want to be with you. I want to marry you. That's the plan. That has always been the plan. It's always been you," Gale protested.
Katniss looked into his eyes. He looked hurt and disappointed. She didn't want to hurt him, not after everything they've been through. But they were all wrong for each other. She knew that. It's time he knew it too.
"No it hasn't Gale. We are friends. Hunting partners. Nothing more. Not now, not ever. I'm not part of any plan." Katniss said softly.
"Why are you saying that? You've been the one I have wanted for years!" Gale practically yelled.
This caught Katniss off guard. This was certainly news to her. He hasn't been behaving like someone who "wanted her for years". Her ire was starting to match his now.
"Are you serious Gale? Years? I don't believe that for a second!"
"Why not?" he huffed like a petulant child.
"How many girls have you gone out with in all the years we've known each other? How many girls have you taken to the slag heap all those years? Hell, how many have you taken there in the last month? I can think of at least three off the top of my head! That is not behavior I would expect from someone that supposedly wanted me for years!"
"Okay, I dated other girls. So what? I was waiting for you to be ready, Catnip. You'll be 18 soon, and you'll graduate shortly after that. The timing is perfect right now. Can't you see that? We're supposed to be together. Everyone knows that. And everyone expects it."
That last line pushed Katniss over the edge. She didn't believe a word he said. He doesn't love or want her. He loves and wants the idea of her. The image of the two best friends forced to survive together after the unexpected deaths of their fathers. They took care of their families, and each other. Then they fell in love and got married. It paints a pretty picture. But Katniss wanted no part of his narrative. She was writing her own.
"This conversation is over, Gale. I don't care what people think or expect. We aren't good for each other. We never will be." Not knowing what else to say, Katniss started to walk away. She didn't want to be around Gale at the moment.
He grabbed her arm as she tried to pass him. "So that's it. You're just going to walk away from me. From us? You're not even going to try?"
"I told you already. There is no 'us' and there is nothing to try. I don't want to be with you. Not in that way. And if you can't respect my answer, then I don't think we can be friends either." She removed the hand that was restraining her and squeezed it gently before letting it go. "Goodbye, Gale."
With a heavy heart, she walked away and didn't look back.
3:30pm
The day was a nightmare. Nothing went the way she thought it would. After her run in with Gale, she was drained. She didn't know what to do or how to feel. She knew things with Gale were changing. But after this, there was no going back. They could never be friends again. She was taken by surprise when she felt her cheeks and realized she had been crying.
When did that happen? She thought to herself.
"Are you alright?"
Katniss started at the sound. She was so distraught she hadn't stopped to take in her surroundings. She was sitting on a bench behind the Cartwright's shop. Delly Cartwright was standing in front of her. She was holding something in her hand. Katniss scowled when she realized it was a handkerchief.
"I, um, I saw you crying, and I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I can go back inside if you want," Delly said hesitantly.
"No. It's fine," Katniss said.
Delly offered her the handkerchief again. This time Katniss accepted it, wiping her eyes and face. Delly sat down next to her and politely waited for Katniss to gather her composure.
"Thank you Delly. It was kind of you to check on me. I didn't mean to, to break down on your bench. I'm sorry." Katniss said as she handed the handkerchief back.
"It's fine Katniss. You look really upset. Is everything okay? I know we aren't friends or anything. But I can be a really good listener. If you want, that is," Delly said softly.
Katniss wasn't used to being so transparent and vulnerable. She usually shied away from talk about feelings or emotions. But she was so drained from the day that her usually high guard was nowhere to be found.
"There isn't much more to say. I lost a good friend today. It's been a long time coming. I've been preparing for it. Or at least I thought I was anyways."
"I'm really sorry to hear that, Katniss. Maybe it isn't all lost. Are you sure you and this friend can't work things out?
Katniss sniffed and nodded. "I'm sure. We want different things."
Delly just nodded. They sat in silence for several minutes. Delly had a reputation of being a chatterbox, but she could tell Katniss needed a moment of quiet.
"Delly?" Mr. Cartwright yelled for his daughter.
"Coming," Delly yelled back. "Sorry. That's my dad. I should get back in."
"Right. I'm sorry I kept you. I need to be going too," Katniss said as she rose to leave. She got a few feet away before she heard Delly behind her.
"Oh wait, Katniss. I can't believe I forgot. Hold on for just a moment. I have something for you!" Before she could respond, Delly was already inside.
What could Delly possibly have for me?
After a moment, Delly came back out, and she was all smiles. She was holding a Valentine.
"Here," she said handing the card to Katniss. "I saw this in the office today after school. It must have gotten lost. It was so chaotic when they were handing them out."
Katniss looked it over suspiciously. Another one?
"Who is it from," she asked.
"I didn't open it," Delly answered. "But, uh, you should. You can stay back here and read it if you want some privacy. My parents won't mind." Without waiting for a response, Delly went back into her parents' shop.
"Thanks, Delly," Katniss said, not realizing the other girl was already gone.
Katniss sat back down on the bench. It had been such a crazy day. She wasn't sure she should open it. But then again, how much worse could this day possibly get. She figured she might as well find out. So she opened the Valentine. What she read made her want to laugh and cry at the same time.
Dear Katniss…
4:00pm
Katniss could hardly believe it. Reading the Valentine Delly gave her was the turning point for her day. It also gave her the boost of courage she needed. She asked if she could "freshen up" in the Cartwright's shop, then headed straight for the bakery.
And now she was standing at the front door. She could see him through the window. He was cleaning the display cases. He looked different form the last time she saw him at lunch. He looked absolutely heartbroken. She knew then that he had to have seen her and Gale at the tree. And it clearly wasn't the part where she turned him down. She was so shocked to see Gale, she completely forgot that she asked Peeta to meet her at the old tree. He must have come to the tree hoping to see her.
She had to make this right. She had feelings for Peeta. Strong feelings. And she now knew he felt the same.
She took a deep breath. She wasn't entirely sure what she was going to say to him, but she was determined to not lose her nerve. Here goes nothing, she thought as she opened the door.
4:00pm
Peeta was angry cleaning the front. He'd already finished all of the prep for tomorrow morning. Not just his share. He finished his brothers' and father's share too. When he was done with that, he scrubbed every flat surface in the back. And when he was done with that, he scrubbed the inside of the ovens.
His family could sense he was upset about something. They'd never seen him so agitated, so they mostly left him to his work. Even Whit didn't bother him. He knew Peeta wanted to confess his feelings for Katniss, and based on his demeanor, he knew it didn't go the way Peeta had hoped.
After he cleaned the back, he moved to the front. He cleaned all the tables and chairs. He was just starting on the display cases when he heard the bell above the door ring. He groaned inwardly. He was in no mood to handle customers right now. But no one else was at the front, so he didn't have a choice.
He turned to face the door, and he couldn't believe his eyes. Katniss was standing in the doorway. She looked like a vision. And she was smiling at him. He knew she would always have this effect on him. Even if she never returned his feelings.
"Hi," she said shyly.
"Oh. Uh. H-hi, Kat-Katniss." Pull yourself together Mellark! You've talked to her before. "What, uh, what are you doing here? It's Wednesday. You usually only come in on Mondays," he said as he nervously scratched the back of his neck.
Oh no, he suddenly thought. What if she is here to order an engagement cake for her and Gale? Those are rare, but Gale could afford it with his job at the school. How was he supposed to make a cake for them?
"Oh. Is this a bad time?" she asked, interrupting his mental panic attack. "I actually, ahem, came to talk to you," she said looking really nervous and unsure all of a sudden.
Way to make her feel unwelcome, Mellark. Ease up, there!
He took a deep breath. He was jumping to conclusions. He didn't know why Katniss was here. But there was only one way to find out. He would listen to her request, and he would do it. Whatever it was. He knew he would never be able to say 'no' to her. So he dug deep and put forth the best smile he could muster. He hoped it would be enough.
"No, it's not a bad time. What can I help you with Katniss?"
That smile is so fake! Katniss thought to herself. In any other circumstance, she might've found the situation funny. But with Peeta looking so miserable, she didn't have the heart to laugh. Hopefully what she came to discuss with him would improve his mood.
"Um, I wanted to talk to you about this," Katniss said as she stepped closer and showed him the lost Valentine.
His face went pale and he froze when he saw what she was holding.
There was an awkward silence, neither knew what to say to the other. A few tense moments passed, and unable to stand the silence anymore, Peeta was the first to speak.
"Uh… you, uh…" he stumbled. Clearing his throat, he tried again. "You got my Valentine."
"Uh, no actually. Wait, I mean, yes. I mean, I just now got it. Delly gave it to me. It, uh, apparently it got lost at school. She found it and gave it to me." Katniss rambled. She couldn't read the look on Peeta's face, but she thought she detected fear. And maybe something akin to hope.
Peeta looked down and asked, "did you read it?" his voice barely above a whisper.
Katniss could hear it in his voice. It wavered slightly. He was afraid. Afraid she'd turn him down. She smiled. She had no intentions of turning him down.
She moved closer to him, hoping he would look at her. No such luck though. His eyes were trained on the cleaning cloth in his hands. So she hesitantly took the cloth from his hands, put it on the counter, then put her finger under his chin to encourage him to make eye contact with her.
What she saw took her breath away. Every mask, every wall was down. He was completely vulnerable and open as she looked into his eyes. She could see love, admiration, and devotion in them so clearly. She wondered how she could have missed it before. And now that she saw it, there was no going back.
"I did," she whispered back. Without waiting for for a response, she pushed up onto her tiptoes, pressed her lips to his, and closed her eyes. Her first kiss. It was perfect, sweet, and chaste.
When she pulled back, Peeta looked stunned. His eyes were the size of saucers. It took him several moments to regain his composure. When he finally did, he gently cupped her face with both hands and kissed her back. This kiss was just as sweet, but she could feel the fire in it too. She knew in that moment, she would never get tired of kissing Peeta Mellark. She wrapped her arms around his waist and deepened the kiss.
When they came up for air, Peeta rested his forehead against hers.
"Does this mean you love me back?" he whispered, still keeping his eyes closed.
"Yes," she whispered back. "Does this mean you'll stay?"
Peeta opened his eyes and jumped back like he had been struck.
"What do you mean stay?" he asked looking confused.
"I came by last week to trade. The back door was open, and I heard you tell your brother that you were considering leaving District 12. Is it, is it true? Are you leaving Peeta?" Katniss barely managed to get the last sentence out as her eyes filled up with tears.
Peeta pulled her into his chest and kissed her temple. He couldn't stand to see her hurt.
"I considered it. Only if Whit didn't get the apprenticeship with the grocer, though. But, Katniss, he did get the apprenticeship. He told me last night. I am staying here, in District 12 with the bakery." He looked down into her eyes and cupped her cheek. "I'm staying with you?" He phrased it as a question. Giving her a chance to change her mind.
"Yes," she said and kissed him again.
"Wait!" Peeta exclaimed a moment later. "It was you!" He said as he reached for something in his back pocket. He pulled out the Valentine she sent him.
Katniss looked at it and blushed deeply. "Yes. I sent that. I, uh, was in such a rush to finish writing it that I forgot to sign it."
Peeta laughed, a full belly laugh, all the disappointment and heartache from the day melted away. "Well, it would have been nice if you had. It certainly would have saved me a lot of trouble today."
"I'm so sorry, Peeta. I tried to get it back to add my name, but…" he silenced her with a kiss.
"It's alright, Katniss," he said drawing her close. "I just need to know one more thing though."
"What's that," she said wrapping her arms around his neck.
Bumping his nose to hers, he asked, "Katniss Everdeen, will you be my Valentine?"
Smiling, she answered, "Always."
Dear Katniss,
I love you. I have loved you for so long. I remember the first time I saw you. It was our first day of school. You were wearing a red dress, and your hair was in two braids instead of one. I remember the moment I knew you were the one for me. We had music class that day. The teacher asked who knew the Valley Song. You raised your hand and started singing. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. Even the birds stopped to listen. That was the moment I knew I was a goner. Over the years I noticed you. You're strong, a survivor. You don't let anyone talk down to you. You are breathtakingly beautiful, though I suspect you won't believe me. You are fiercely protective of those you care about, Prim being at the top of the list. Cheese buns are your favorite, yet you buy sourdough because that is Prim's favorite, and you can deny her nothing. Your favorite color is green, and your prized possession is your father's hunting jacket. I know I should be brave enough to say all of this to you directly, but I'm not. So I wrote this instead. If you think you could ever love me back, please meet me at the old tree after school today.
Yours always,
Peeta Mellark
Thank you for reading! This is my first fanfic (or any story for that matter), so I would love to know what you think!
I also want to give a shout out to geekymoviemom. Thank you for your support, encouragement and friendship! She has several amazing stories I highly recommend!
