A/N: Taken from tumblr, but why do I feel like I've stolen this straight out of a Desperate Housewives episode?
Warning: strong language, sex toys, and Regina's lacking experience with them...
(I've no experience with these, if it shows in this piece – apologies.)
Harnessed
"What seems to be the problem here?" Emma asked as she pulled up to the scene of the crime, hand already settled on the gun holstered at her hip. Coming through the door, she made to move towards one of her deputies who had arrived just before her, but her eyes caught on the familiar black trench coat hovering in her peripheral. "Are you kidding me…?" Frowning, she stepped towards the figure and asked, deadpan, "What are you doing here, Madam Mayor? This is official police business."
Regina Mills felt the words slip down her spine like ice water, her back going rigid at the implication that there was anywhere in this town that she didn't belong. Turning slowly, she raised an eyebrow at the sheriff and gave her a disdainful once-over. "I have every right to be here, Sheriff," and so what if she didn't, her glower more than made up for the possible white lie, "the town's safety is my top priority." A beat passed, with Emma's jaw setting, and then she thought to add with an unpleasant smirk, "Still not wearing the appropriate uniform, I see." Her eyebrow-raise held all the condescension a further insult would deliver.
Doing her best to repress an eye roll, Emma clenched her fingers into fists and spun around to her deputy. "So, what's happened?" The house looked fairly deserted – and unavoidably normal – she wondered vaguely if there had been a domestic…
"Underground sex workers," Regina piped up before the uniform-clad deputy had a chance to speak, instantly gaining Emma's attention.
"Uhm…what?" Here in Storybrooke? Somehow, Emma couldn't see it.
Regina rolled her eyes. Was the law really being upheld by this… this…? "A brothel, Sheriff Swan," she elaborated, leaving the added 'perhaps you're more familiar with that term' to her thoughts.
Emma scowled, preparing to tell Regina she knew full well what she meant by 'sex workers', but thought best not to start an argument just yet. They always found time for their little debates, this one could certainly wait until she was off the clock. Or, at least, not faced with the most exciting crime to happen in Storybrooke since her arrival – and, hell, most likely before that, too.
"The women have already been escorted to your station," Regina was saying, now. "Deputy Lucas made sure to see to that for you."
Insult noted and ignored. "Great," Emma nodded. More paperwork for me. "So…where is it?"
The house certainly didn't look like the usual scene of the crime. In fact, from what she'd seen, it looked more or less identical to the other three-bedroomed, detached houses in town. It was hard to imagine a brothel being open in plain sight like this.
Unlike Emma, Regina did not hold back her seemingly pained eye roll. "As I said, sheriff, underground."
When Emma didn't catch on, she gestured to a door on their left and headed towards it. Emma followed without question, until they were both peering through the door and down a dimly-lit set of stairs.
"Ah… sweet."
Regina made to turn around so that her frown would be made aware, but Emma was already barging past her and bundling down the stairs. Not one to be left behind, Regina quickly followed.
"Oh, wow," Emma smirked, taking in the zebra-print wallpaper and expected (tacky) décor. She walked the large space, taking in sectioned off beds with flimsy curtains. Not the best she'd seen in her time. Not even close.
When Regina entered the room, her legs tensed as though afraid her heels would stick to the flooring. She frowned around at the cramped space, though couldn't help but notice the almost disappointed look on the Emma's face. "You don't look too pleased," she commented, taking a further tentative step into the room and making sure to keep a distance from everything else.
Emma shrugged. "We're in a brothel, what do you want me to look pleased about?" she asked, assessing the equipment. It probably wasn't best to let Regina know the real reason behind her displeasure.
Remaining vaguely aware of Emma's presence, Regina regarded the room with curious distaste. Her eyes fell to a tall bookcase, its original purpose grossly perverted, where numerous sex-items sat. She wasn't sure she'd ever seen so many dildos or nipple tassels in one place at a time – that wasn't the internet, of course. Her gaze paused when her eyes fell on a most peculiar looking device. Walking towards it, she made sure to remain an arm's length from reaching distance and frowned at it. What the hell is that? It looked more like it would belong better in a dry cleaner's, rather than a brothel.
She was only made aware of Emma's presence again when the other woman appeared over her shoulder, muttering, "Oh, nice… I haven't seen one of these in years."
Frowning at the absurdity of the statement, Regina followed her as she stepped closer to the peculiar set of black bands. "You're familiar with this piece of equipment?" she asked, trying to mask her curiosity with an extra ounce of derision. "Why am I not surprised?"
Emma's smirk faltered and she turned to look over her shoulder. Don't take the 'high and mighty' with me, Regina Mills, I can only hope of understanding the twisted little fantasies going around that head of yours… Sighing, she turned back to the equipment and shrugged. "I've seen a few in my time, yeah." Her voice was cool, controlled. "This one doesn't even look to have been used yet." She frowned at the thick bands and buckles, not even properly assembled.
Curious, Regina stepped closer, eyeing whatever it was Emma was now twisting around with a pointed frown and pursed lips. "What is it?" she asked before she could stop herself, instantly regretting her question when Emma turned to her like she had grown a second head.
"You…don't know?" Emma had to keep the smirk from her face, overly aware of being in a basement – alone – with the often thought psychotic mayor. It wouldn't do her any good to piss her off now – or worse, humiliate her. She wanted to walk out of this basement alive, not carried in a body bag with a set of anal beads rammed through one ear.
But Regina instantly bounced the comment back and straightened her spine. "No, Ms. Swan, not all of us dabble in such filth." Emma rolled her eyes and nodded. Walked right into that one.
Deciding that dirtying Regina's oh so innocent mind with talk of sex toys was just too good an opportunity to pass up on, she answered the woman's earlier question with a simple, "It's a sex swing."
Regina's head jolted with surprise and she eyed the equipment before her, now, with more curiosity. Despite the little voice in her head telling her to get out of there, forget about it, she asked, "Pray tell… what exactly would one do with this…sex swing?" She couldn't imagine the hooked strings catching on; no wonder it hadn't been assembled already.
"Well, to start," Emma smirked, "one would have to be two. They're not much fun on your own."
Regina rolled her eyes but nodded. Go on, she thought, unable to voice the prompt.
Unable to help herself, Emma took the loop at the top of the swing and hung it up on the hook provided. It looked sturdy enough. "You see," she held out the two stirrups, "you put your feet through these and secure yourself in this bit. It looks pretty flimsy, but it holds you up pretty securely." She shook another part of the thick black bands, emphasising her point. "And then… y'know…" She shrugged a shoulder, as though the rest was obvious.
Regina tilted her head to one side and gave it a slow shake. "It doesn't look overly comfortable," she murmured. No one would be seeing her in one of them anytime soon, that was for sure.
"No, not really." Emma shook her head, too, voice high with reason. "See, you're perfectly secured with these straps. They're not that uncomfortable at all." She almost blushed at the little tid-bit she had just given away, but mused that Regina most likely already thought the worst of her. No damage done there.
"I really don't see how." Regina refused to give into the argument; when had she ever valued Sheriff Swan's opinion over her own? Or anyone else's, for that matter.
Do I really have to demonstrate? Emma snickered. Now there's an idea…
"Sheriff," Regina almost choked as she watched Emma hook one foot into a stirrup. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"
Emma shrugged off the wide-eyed, furious look Regina was giving her and answered, "You wanted to know how it works. Now, give me hand."
"I will have no part in this-"fuck "-tampering of evidence."
Emma actually snickered at that. Good save, but it's not gonna keep me from teaching you an important lesson in life. "Fine… I'll do it myself."
And, oh, the amount of times she had had to take that path because of Regina Mills…
# # # #
"Where's the Sheriff?" Ruby asked the other deputy – Rubin, a good guy with a serious hood-fetish and disdain against "social elite" – as she entered the 'Brothel House', as it was currently being called around town. News spread fast.
"Still down there," Rubin offered with a nod towards the door that led to the basement. "She's, er, with the mayor." They shared a nervous glance. "If she's still alive, ask her if I can get off early?"
Ruby smirked and rolled her eyes. She'd better be alive, she thought, there's no way in hell I'm saving her ass from drowning in paperwork tonight. "Sure," she smiled, heading for the door. "Just try not to turn up to work with an arrow in your butt tomorrow morning, hm?" She laughed at Rubin's 'har-har' mock-smirk and took to the stairs.
Thinking against calling out for Emma – if the mayor had done her in with an extra-large dildo, there was no way she was gonna be next – Ruby quietly descended and stepped into the main room of the brothel. Her feet stopped short as soon as she saw what the sheriff was doing – and with whom.
An expression somewhere between incredulity and awe filled her face as she watched Regina Mills – Regina fucking Mills – assess the harness that was holding Emma up from the ground at hip level, from directly between Emma's legs.
"Oh…" Her lips wobbled, whether excited or startled, instantly gaining the attention of both women from across the room. Their looks alternated between furious and shocked. "O-kay," she managed, already backing up, "I'll come back later."
She was quick to disappear, taking the stairs two at a time, and when she emerged Rubin instantly asked what was wrong. "Don't go down there," she offered, but a grin was already pulling up at her lips, and she couldn't quite keep from bursting out into raucous laughter.
"No, Ruby!" Emma tried to shout up the stairs, struggling furiously to wriggle her way out of the harness, "This isn't- agh, hell!"
Looking an impressive combination of utterly mortified, uncomfortable, and annoyed, Regina turned on her and seethed, "If this gets out, Sheriff!" She let the threat hang; she didn't think it needed completing. Plus, she'd already used her best lines on Emma before. 'I will destroy your happiness' has more of an effect the first time around.
"Will you just help me out?!" Emma cried, trying to keep the shrillness from her voice, and horribly failing.
Regina frowned at her thrashing and studied the sex swing, wondering which way would be best to dismantle it. She thought to merely walk out, put on a brave (read: murderous) face, and threaten the life out of Deputy Lucas until the mere thought of telling somebody of what she had just walked in on would send shivers down the woman's spine. But then, she supposed, she would do well to keep Emma on her side. She didn't want her getting any ideas of besmirching her reputation…
"Stop struggling," she finally scowled, and when Emma did not, she did what she had to do – or, at least, that's what she told herself – and took only a modicum of pleasure in releasing the link that held the harness to the thick rope that hung from the ceiling hook. Emma's howl of pain and surprise upon landing in a heap on the floor, she mused, probably shouldn't have excited her as much as it did…
# # # #
Ruby looked up from her desk the second she heard the door handle rattle. She had to repress a smirk when she saw Emma enter with a limp, but there was no taming her grin when the sheriff stopped at her desk, gripping onto the edge, and winced when she pressed a hand to her backside.
"Rough night?" Ruby asked coyly, having had a good twenty minutes to prepare for Emma's expected death glare.
"Not another word, Lucas," Emma barked, cursing Regina and her stupidly smug parting smirk as she made for her chair. Her eyes almost watered as she took to her seat and began work on the mountain of paperwork that awaited her.
She was definitely bruised, that much she already knew, but as much as she hated Regina right now, she supposed she should be grateful that she hadn't, at least, asked to see her handiwork…
