A/N: From the warped mind that brought you Sonic the Satire and Hotel Sonic comes something you thought you'd probably never see... SOMETHING INVOLVING ACTUAL MARIO! Sadly, I have chosen to write this in script format (buy your torches and pitchforks here) but I've already established myself as a writer who uses "asked" and "said" WAY too much. Well, Anyways, please enjoy my acid trip.

Let me tell you a story nobody cares about. Once upon time there was nothing and then there was Howard the Duck and then Super Paper Mario appeared and ThatNintendoFanGirl tried to write it, but failed, and this obssesive fangirl started to "annoy" the jester and now I'm here, telling you this lame story. But let's get on with it because this is really just filler.

Chapter Intro:
Bestiality, eBooks and the Third Person

Amy was just waking from a long black out. She had been in her hotel room the previous night and now, bam, she was in the middle of an alter where a bunch of Eggman's robots were watching!...wait, what? Um, anyways, Eggman was there too, along with what looked like a floating accountant and some whit-caped Dracula wannabe. Well, actually, you couldn't see much past his AWESOME moncle. The man/thing/Dracula cleared his throat.

White Dracula: We have gathered to join these two in unholy matrimony for no real reason by Count Bleck!

Amy: Wait, me and Fatso over there?

Dr. Eggman: Hey, Fatsos have feelings too ya know!

Amy: Isn't that kinda bestiality?

Accountant: Yeah, uh, no, I did the paperwork so it's technically legal. I mean, we previously tried to do this to a turtle and a princess and you two are basically are option B. So just go along with it, K?

Amy: Well, not burst whatever bubble your floating in, but I'm not a princess.

Count Bleck *muttering to Accountant*: Count Bleck wants to know if it has to be a princess.

The accountant pulled out an eBook and began to scan through it.

Accountant: Yeah, it has to be. These rules are pretty tight.

Count Bleck: Really? Let Count Bleck see that!

Amy: Oh, for the love of Grambi, will you stop speaking in the third person! You're not Elmo!

Count Bleck: Says who?

Amy: Says Amy!

Count Bleck: Count Bleck says don't do that!

Amy: Amy says she doesn't care.

Count Bleck: Count Bleck says he thinks you're mocking him.

Amy: Amy says you're kinda slow.

Count Bleck: Count Bleck says he is not!

A bunch of Eggman's minions and Dr. Eggman were dancing along to a parody of Michael Jackson's "Thriller" called "Filler".

Amy: Amy says you are too!

Count Bleck: Count Bleck says enough! You will get married young missy and you will like it!

Count Bleck thought for a second.

Count Bleck: Also, gimme your VISA card.

Amy relectantly handed it over.

Count Bleck: Ha ha! Now Count Bleck can charge your credit card bill up a duck's butt!

Amy: NO!

Floating Jester (Who, BTW, is totally in no way in the Underwhere related to another jester who's name may or may not be similar to Dimentio): Like a snail in molasses you are very slow! Hurry it the heck up!

Amy and Count Bleck both muttered somethings rude under their breath and they went on with the ceremony. While the Accountant just texted something quickly to the Floating Hester. The Floating Jester just looked at it, got a look of dread and was then teleported away to two fangirls whose only goal in life was to torut- I mean ann- Ah, who am I kidding? They're torturing him.

Accountant: Anyways, while you two were bickering, I looked through the book and found out she only has to look like a princess. It's oddly specific, but at the same time a moron. We can all agree, K?

Everybody agreed (K?) as Amy put the princess dress thingy on.

Count Bleck: OK, we have you in the dress-

Amy nodded.

Count Bleck: -So all we need is a dragon.

Everybody looked at Eggman.

Dr. Eggman: Uhm... OK, all we need is the fourth piece of the Triforce and-

Minion #6563: I got an old Barney the Dinosaur costume!

Dr. Eggman's jaw hit the floor as the costume was forced on him.

Minion #83693: So we have Barney the Dinosaur getting married to what looks like Snow White by an Accountant and some kind of evil, possibly tragic, villainous Elmo impersonator... This wedding just got awesome!

Count Bleck: Count Bleck wants to get this all over with so let's just skip right to the end: Amy, do you take Fatso?

Amy: Well, if it's technically legal.

Dr. Eggman: You stupid! STOOPID!

Count Bleck: And now Count Bleck shall ask Fatso...

Dr. Eggman: Are you high? I'm not marring a hedgehog who doesn't really look like a hedgehog! This isn't just bestiality! It's paedophilia! PETA is gonna have your a**!

Accountant: Am I the only tired of his whining? Probably. So I'm just gonna make you say yes, K?

Two red boxes were drawn around Eggman by a mouse cursor and he fell flat on his fat back.

Accountant: So just say yes, Fatso, and we can go, K?

Dr. Eggman*struggling to keep control*: N-n-n-n-no!

Accountant: Well, I guess I have to play hard no, K?

Eggman jumped up in sudden pain as if he was just shocked and then he fell on his back.

Accountant: Now you gonna say yes?

Dr. Eggman in extreme pain: N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-no!

Accountant: Fine. I'll just crank it up again, K?

And so the Accountant did. This went on for a while until she got to, wait for it, DULL SURPRISE!...no, it was actually ONE POINT TWENTY ONE JIGGAWATTS! And by that point, Count Bleck, the Accountant and Amy were all sitting on the steps leading up to the altar as the minions goofed off.

Accountant: NOW?

Dr. Eggman: N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-no!

The Accountant threw his/her/its hands up.

Accountant: This is hopeless, K? He stutters more then the freaking "Stutter Rap"!

Amy: I'll give it a try.

Amy went up to Eggman a held a gun to his head.

Amy *imitating Ganon*: YOU DARE NOT MARRY ME? YOU MUST DIE!

Dr. Eggman *in sudden fear: I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it! I'll do it!

Amy: And you won't be a deadbeat?

Dr. Eggman: No ma'am!

Amy: Just what I thought.

Count Bleck and the Accountant just stared at Amy as Eggman got up and the two resumed their places.

Amy: Well? Come finish the job!

Count Bleck and the Accountant both took their places and began to finish it.

Count Bleck: OK, so blah blah blah blah, Count Bleck now pronounces you marrried!

Just as those words were spoken, a giant blob of dark matter in all sorts of different shades came rising out the middle.

Count Bleck: Behold, Count Bleck says. Pure Chaos!

Everybody: What?

Count Bleck: Well, since the Chaos Heart failed, I decided to combine it with what they call "Chaos Emeralds"!

Everybody gasped.

Amy: It isn't that shocking, Everybody.

Everybody: It's shocking to me!

Just then, Tails ran in.

Tails *out of breath: Sorry I'm late! My invite must have gotten lost in the mail.

Count Bleck: Count Bleck didn't sent you an invite.

Tails sweatdropped.

Tails: Anyways, what's going on here!

Count Bleck: Nothing you can stop, Foxy!

The altar then began to fall apart as Tails began to race towards Pure Chaos. But, alas, he could not reach it. Everything faded to white as the title was shown. Somebody threw a rotten tomato at the screen.

And so the story hath begun. Care? I don't.

A/N: And that's about it. Review and rate out of ten! Also, no flames unless you wanna be flamed back. So anyways, good night and good luck.