The Final Fantasy 8 Saga

The FF7 Meets FF8 Saga!!!!

This is a funny series from the author of The Cloud Sagas! Me! ENJOY!!!!!

(Squall and the gang were in…uh…….Esthar ……..they were having a meeting in the Presidential Palace)

Squall: So…….how we gonna take out Ultimecia?

Rinoa: Uh…….

Zell: Punches!!!!!!!! Whoo whoo! Hot!

(Squall throws Chinese Throwing Cheese)

Zell: OWIE!

(Aeris and Vincent appears)

Aeris: I'm in!

Vincent: Me too!

(Cloud appears)

Cloud: And I!

(Cloud tackles Aeris, they fall in hole, hole is sealed by metal, and the talk continues.)

Zell: Maybe we could use Dynamite and blow Ass Wuss to Kingdom Come!

(Seifer appears)

Seifer: Hello, Chicken Wuss, Loner Boy Wuss, and Sweet Girl Wuss. And look, Cowboy Wuss and Whip Wuss, and I see Vampire Wuss too!

Vincent and Lila: NOT A VAMPIRE!!!!!!!!

Lila: Why you! (hits Seifer with Cheese Hammer)

Seifer: OW! Why I see birds? Why I crack nose? *crack* AAAAAAAAAAH…….(falls) *splat*

Lila: Isn't it funny *splat* that things *splat* can appear *splat* out of *splat* nowhere?

Vincent: Uh…………YEAH!!!!!!!

Seifer: (gets up) Meanies.

Lila: I think we can beat Ultimecia by using the Mega Cheese Thrower Materia!

Seifer: You can't win! (Seifer goes away)

Lila: I'm gonna file a lawsuit!!!!!

Lila's Clone: Against who?

Lila's Angel: I think against Microsoft

Lila's E-Mail Adress: Beep Bloop

Lila's Clone: I see.

Lila: Yup! Against Microsoft!!

Lila's Angel: Let's go to Ultimecia's Castle!

Lila: Okay.

(and so they all go to Ultimecia's Castle.)

Zell: Punches! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Seifer: Oh look, It's Lila Wuss and Angel Wuss, and Clone Wuss, and E-Mail Wuss

Lila: SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SEIFER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Seifer: (Draws Gunblade) Fire Cross!!!!!!!

(it misses)

Lila: Cheese Boom!

(Cheese goes KABOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!)

Ultimecia: You have killed Seifer but not me…………..ULTIMATE ME BLAST! GO MINI ME!!!!!!!!

KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOlemonsOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!

Lila's Angel: Holy Light!

Ultimecia: OWW!!!!! You hurt me! You gave me a boo-boo! WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! (cries)

(faintly, noises from underground Esthar can be heard………)

Aeris: Oh, Cloud!

Cloud: Aeris………….

Aeris: Cloud

Cloud: Aeris

Aeris: Bugenhagen!

Cloud: BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHAAAAAA!

Lila: Sounds like they're having fun! Hee hee! Let's go down and see what they are up to!

Squall: No, Lila, this is only a PG-13, dammit! (grabs Lila by the collar)

Lila: HEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLP!

Squall: (puts Lila down)

Ultimecia: My boo-boo hurts! Mean people! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Squall: Lionheart!!!!!!!!!!

(Ultimecia dies, we end our story, Squall throws up, eats peas and a pig and the goes insane. YAY!)

Lila: TORTURE RACKS NEEDED!!!!!!!!!

Vincent: Here, I'll torture Zell!

Zell: NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(sounds of death, disembowelment, and Squall getting drunk and squirming around.)

THE END!!!!!!!!!