The FF7 Meets FF8 Saga!!!!
This is a funny series from the author of The Cloud Sagas! Me! ENJOY!!!!!
(Squall and the gang were in…uh…….Esthar ……..they were having a meeting in the Presidential Palace)
Squall: So…….how we gonna take out Ultimecia?
Rinoa: Uh…….
Zell: Punches!!!!!!!! Whoo whoo! Hot!
(Squall throws Chinese Throwing Cheese)
Zell: OWIE!
(Aeris and Vincent appears)
Aeris: I'm in!
Vincent: Me too!
(Cloud appears)
Cloud: And I!
(Cloud tackles Aeris, they fall in hole, hole is sealed by metal, and the talk continues.)
Zell: Maybe we could use Dynamite and blow Ass Wuss to Kingdom Come!
(Seifer appears)
Seifer: Hello, Chicken Wuss, Loner Boy Wuss, and Sweet Girl Wuss. And look, Cowboy Wuss and Whip Wuss, and I see Vampire Wuss too!
Vincent and Lila: NOT A VAMPIRE!!!!!!!!
Lila: Why you! (hits Seifer with Cheese Hammer)
Seifer: OW! Why I see birds? Why I crack nose? *crack* AAAAAAAAAAH…….(falls) *splat*
Lila: Isn't it funny *splat* that things *splat* can appear *splat* out of *splat* nowhere?
Vincent: Uh…………YEAH!!!!!!!
Seifer: (gets up) Meanies.
Lila: I think we can beat Ultimecia by using the Mega Cheese Thrower Materia!
Seifer: You can't win! (Seifer goes away)
Lila: I'm gonna file a lawsuit!!!!!
Lila's Clone: Against who?
Lila's Angel: I think against Microsoft
Lila's E-Mail Adress: Beep Bloop
Lila's Clone: I see.
Lila: Yup! Against Microsoft!!
Lila's Angel: Let's go to Ultimecia's Castle!
Lila: Okay.
(and so they all go to Ultimecia's Castle.)
Zell: Punches! WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Seifer: Oh look, It's Lila Wuss and Angel Wuss, and Clone Wuss, and E-Mail Wuss
Lila: SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SEIFER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Seifer: (Draws Gunblade) Fire Cross!!!!!!!
(it misses)
Lila: Cheese Boom!
(Cheese goes KABOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Ultimecia: You have killed Seifer but not me…………..ULTIMATE ME BLAST! GO MINI ME!!!!!!!!
KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOlemonsOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!
Lila's Angel: Holy Light!
Ultimecia: OWW!!!!! You hurt me! You gave me a boo-boo! WAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! (cries)
(faintly, noises from underground Esthar can be heard………)
Aeris: Oh, Cloud!
Cloud: Aeris………….
Aeris: Cloud
Cloud: Aeris
Aeris: Bugenhagen!
Cloud: BWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHHHHHAAAAAA!
Lila: Sounds like they're having fun! Hee hee! Let's go down and see what they are up to!
Squall: No, Lila, this is only a PG-13, dammit! (grabs Lila by the collar)
Lila: HEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLP!
Squall: (puts Lila down)
Ultimecia: My boo-boo hurts! Mean people! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
Squall: Lionheart!!!!!!!!!!
(Ultimecia dies, we end our story, Squall throws up, eats peas and a pig and the goes insane. YAY!)
Lila: TORTURE RACKS NEEDED!!!!!!!!!
Vincent: Here, I'll torture Zell!
Zell: NO! NO! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
(sounds of death, disembowelment, and Squall getting drunk and squirming around.)
THE END!!!!!!!!!
