I do not own The Middle or Mad Men, nor do I have any dealings with the shows this fanfiction is pure fantasy and is not to be taken seriously...thank you...Enjoy.
Time Door 1966
Orson, Indiana Memorial Day 2016
It was memorial day weekend in Orson, Indiana and Axl Heck had a cool out of this world surprise for his family. He found a place while he was at college a door so to speak by the science lab...and today he decided to take the Heck's on an out of this world adventure.
"Where are you taking us Axl?" Frankie asked her son while fixing her 'Frugal Hoosier' lip-stick in the passenger seat visor mirror.
"Trust me mom, it's a cool place I 'found by accident' wandering around the campus of East Indiana State... trust me mom you will not be disappointed.
"Come on Axl will you tell us Sue and Brick need to use the restroom and I can't handle your mothers gas station impulse buys of day old chilli dogs...sorry Frankie it kind of lingers back here... just sayin' dear." Mike Heck couldn't stand being cooped up with the kids in the back, he was curious about this trip and was getting more frustrated by the moment.
"Chill out dad I got this. Believe me when you all see this place your minds will be permanently blown! Gawd! would everyone just trust me? Just sit back and chill...just chill."
"I'm with dad Axl, where are we going? I really really gotta pee Axl come on tell us."
"Yeah Axl, I can't read 'Planet nowhere' with all this arguing! are we almost there? (Brick whispers)- almost there... Whoop!"
"WOULD EVERYONE JUST...SHUT UP! no one is going to the restroom, we're almost there sit back and keep your mouths closed! GAWD!"Axl screams at the family a few miles from East Indiana State.
"Oh darn! my lip-stick broke... guess thats what I get for getting my make-up from the frugles discount clearance bin. Oh sorry Axl, I'll be quite... EVERYONE BE QUIET SO YOUR BROTHER WILL GET OFF OUR BACKS...SHHHH! MIKE." Frankie says as she gazes at her son lovingly. Axl always had a place in her heart, being the first kid and oldest son... Axl could get away with murder.
The Hecks continue down the road awhile in silence. Sue looking pissed, Mike biting nails and Brick lost on planet nowhere. Frankie looks out the passenger window and sees Axl is taking them to a dumping area behind the college... It leaves her scratching her head, but she trust her oldest boy and is very curious about where this is heading.
"Alright fine folks and Sue, we're here."
"Axl!" Sue hissed.
"Here,where's here a field with a bunch of trash and what looks like industrial waste barrels." Frankie says stepping out of the car... watching her step trying not to step on rusty nails and broken glass.
"Just follow me hurry hurry!"
"Axl, this is dumb"
"yeah Axl"
"I have to agree with Sue and Brick on this one. How about you Frankie? This is plain stupid." Mike says really ticked off at his sons choice of spots to take them on Memorial day.
"Oh Mike live a little...where we headed Axl? I bet it someplace awesome."
"Oh Mom it is, see that over there, that circle of trash? stand with me...trust me it's gunna be cool."
"I think you've done lost your mind Axl! You've gone completely bonkers...Dad do something!" Sue said to Mike hoping he could control the situation before it got completely out of hand.
"Stop it and stand in your brothers trash circle." Frankie said to the family. I mean an outing is an outing right?
"Alright family lets all hold hands in a circle you see, awhile back I noticed they dumped alot of sciencie mad lab sort of cool stuff." Axl said
"You mean to tell me we're all standing on a bunch toxic junk...Frankie lets go I'm not getting sick I gotta go to work tomorrow we don't have time for this nonsense... lets go. In the car now!"
"Would y'all just stand in the damn circle like a family and hold fricken hands GAWD! Dad, hold mom's hand."
Axl commanded of his dad.
"I don't know Axl, I'm scared, and I left my book in the car."
"Brick...shhhh!"
"Alright lets join hands."
The Heck family joins hands, and things start looking funny. The sky starts changing colors and the surrounding area starts waving like liquid heat on asphalt.
"Axl -Axl why is the sky changing color?" ask Sue.
"She's right Axl red - blue - green - purple." chimes in Mike.
"I think it's beautiful honey!" Frankie says staring with amazement at the sight.
"Axl... everything stretching like colorful 3-D iridescent putty into the sky! I think I'm gonna get sick... the world won't stop moving twisting Axl!" said Brick trying not to let go of Sue and Mike's hand.
"No ones getting sick on my I mean your brothers day, now you all just stop!" screamed Frankie.
"This folks you all are entering is something called a 'time door' I will think of the time and place since I'm so awesome and we'll be there stand still and be quite while I concentrate."
"Better take us some place good Axl I could be watching a pre-recorded Indianapolis Colts game right now! hurry up with the time door thing-a-magig...make it snappy."
"You heard you're father, make it snappy with the time door thingy." yelled Frankie.
"GAWD, would you guys hush. I'm trying to concentrate!"
Axl closed his eyes and thought of a place he went once before and a man named Don Draper who's life he'd possess if only for a moment. you see with time doors you only get a finite amount of time before you get snapped back to your own... also the one concentrating gets to enter a body and the others tag along remaining in their own bodies.
"Axl I'm scared!" screamed Sue.
"Axl!... I wanna get my book Axl!"
"This is so much better than a dinner at French Lick! thanks Axl sweetheart."
"Remember that Frankie, don't say I don't take you nowhere... nice colors and shapes Axl... Good job!"
The lights and colors got brighter and the earth became quicksand and vapor then the world started to melt away the Heck family slowly evaporated into time and space their voices distorting in the echoes... and finally dissolving into nothing.
New York, New York Memorial Day 1966
"Axl -Axl, where are we? everything is still kind of blurry Axl -Axl!" Frankie Heck yelled out from the fog of multicolored light.
"Mom...Quiet! Oh God my head is ringing it takes a moment to get adjusted...everybody just shut up a moment." Axl hissed, holding a face that was no longer his.
"Watch your tone Axl...apologize to your mother." Mike said while adjusting his eyes to the world coming into focus.
"Yeah Axl! Apologize to mom!...why does the world look like I'm staring at a fun-house mirror? this sucks Axl."
"Shut up Sue...Gawd!"
"My body feels like stretched taffy Axl!"Brick said hardly able to walk straight.
The world slowly came in focus to the Heck clan. Then they finally saw the world Axl was trying to describe.
"Good God Axl this is pretty snazzy." Frankie said looking at the luxurious hall the family bliped into.
"I don't know Axl this looks pretty pricey thats it were going home find that time door thing lets go." Mike said already concerned about the price.
"Dad we're like in the 1960s things are cheap...Gawd and like I believe this is all like mine take a chill would ya!"
"Axl my God your face - what happened to your face!?"Frankie said looking at a face that no longer seemed to be Axl Heck.
"Oh, Mom...this is that guy Don Draper I willed myself into. It's still the same Ax-Man you all know and love...cool it."
Axl Heck opens the door to a swanky apartment where there seems to be a gathering and it appears to be for Don's birthday.
"My lord Axl, alot of cigarette and cigar smoke."
"act cool y'all try to blend in I'm gonna take a seat right over here I think there's like music about to go on see the instruments? "
"Looks like they're giving out drinks Frankie do you know what they drank in the 60s?" Mike said looking at the mixing bar in the room.
"One Newbury cocktail!" Frankie hollered to a woman with a tray.
"Well I guess I'll have hmmmm. I'LL HAVE A MIKADO COCKTAIL MY GOOD MAN!" Mike Heck yelled feeling at home in 'Axl's' new digs.
"Hi I'm Peggy love the threads, Don who are these people?"
"Uh um yeah these are the Smith's from...France."
"So...this is what they're wearing in Paris? love that shade of lip-stick is it available in the states yet?"
"Oh this? It's 'punk rock red'."Frankie said flattered at the compliment.
"Punk rock red, hmmm sounds like something the 'Stones' would come up with my god what a world we live in right?...what was your name?"
"Oh,oh ummm Frankie ummm Smith."
"Oh Peggy I'm Sue Sue Smith...can I get a pop I mean a coke?" Sue said confidently.
"Well, Sue Sue Smith since y'all seem to think I'm your server I guess I'll get those drinks and the pop for you sweet dears...manners in France seem to never change."
"Sue, Mike cool it...And Brick get over here quit going through the bookshelf you break it you buy it buddy! stay by me."
"But mom, it's a signed 1st edition of 'The Naked Lunch' by William S. Burroughs." Brick says in a state of euphoria.
"Brick! I have a feeling it's dirty, put it back, get over here young man!"
"Oh live a little Frankie (Axl speaking as Don Draper) I'll pay for the damages it's on me Brick Smith get yourself a chocolate milk or something...Kids am I right?"
The Hecks get their drinks and stand around 'Don' when they notice the band getting ready to play.
"Happy Birthday Don...this is for you."Megan says standing before Don (Axl).
"Oh,Mom Dad thats my woman Megan pretty hot huh?"
"Damn Axl I mean (Don) snagged you a good one." Mike says gazing at the womans legs.
"Stop it mike eyes up here and by up here I mean me I don't want you falling for some time warp floozie."
The music starts and Megan starts to dance. the family staring at the scene - mouths opened not knowing what to say.
"Un Deux Trois! [Zou bisou bisou
Zou bisou bisou, mon Dieu qu'ils sont doux..."]
"He snagged him a good one Frankie." Mike says rubbing her on the back.
"She's so gorgeous mom!"Sue says enviously.
"Her voice is quite soothing...(whispers) soothing...Whoop!"
"One nice girl hell that ain't a girl that's a full fledged woman."
"Mike (slaps arm) stop it just enjoy the song."Frankie says slightly blushing.
[Zou bisou bisou
Zou bisou bisou..]
"Brick stop robot dancing...people are staring."
The music continues and the Heck's lose themselves in the moment.
"Hey bar-keep I'll have another drink and top off Sue's pop would ya...sure you don't want anything Brick?"
"Brick honey, quit dancing sweetheart and listen to your dad...And yeah keep those drinks coming mamma needs another one of those Newbury drink things!"Frankie says as she snaps her fingers.
[Zou bisou bisou
Zou bisou bisou...]
"That a boy Axl." Mike says proudly swinging his fist.
"Mike stop making a scene...Brick!"
"Wow Mom maybe I should try out for something musical like a band or something." Sue says mesmerized by Megan's singing.
"whoa! looks like our boy Axl is having fun look at those legs too bad he can only time door thing himself here only once in awhile old Don Draper doesn't know what he's missin'."Mike says with a big envious grin.
"Oh Mike act your age let our son have some fun...and what am I a big sack of Frugal Hoosier potatoes?" Frankie say shaking her head cutting her eyes at Mike.
"Yeah Dad! it isn't like Axl invented time doors...I mean just because you discover gravity doesn't mean you invented it...Jeeze!" Sue said shrugging her sholders.
[Car c'est curieux tu vois je l'avoue
Ça me fait partout zou bisou bisou
Zou bisou bisou des petits bisous !]
" Happy 40th Don!"the anonymous crowd says to 'Axl'.
"whoa happy 40th good goin'!" Mike says whistling through his fingers.
"Mom...Axl always gets the attention no matter where he goes."Pouts sue.
"Oh honey your time will come just be happy for your brother...Hey! any more of those drinks coming mamma needs a refill! "
"Ok guys we ain't got much time I know I'm like about to get lucky and stuff...I think. But I feel the shift about to happen...hurry! Follow me into the hallway."
"Axl..we just got here ahhh hell I'm coming Mike, Kids come on!"
"Where you going Don?"
"Megan, I'm just...ummmm...I'll be back in a moment just doing some business you know the French right?"
The Heck's stand out of view and start to feel the same distortion they felt before.
"Axl, are you kidding me and I forgot my damned drink I'll be back in a jiff."
"Mom no, there's no time grab my hand hurry."
The Heck family start dissolving into vapor and multicolored lights and being stretched like taffy pulled through time and space.
"Oh God Axl it feels like my I'm turning into prism light Axl!"Sue screams.
"Axl...I have the feeling I'm about to have one cosmic sized hangover!"
"Same here Axl!"
"I hope my books ok...if I could only keep my eyes in my head I think they're floating around the Andromeda galaxy."
"Gawd, would you all be quiet and enjoy the awesomeness I've just given to y'all to witness!"
"Axl, I think I'm going to be sick...Mom!"
"Shut up Sue!" yelled Axl.
"The iridescent cosmic colors are burning my thoughts Axl are we almost home...I wanna read 'planet nowhere'."
"I think..."
Orson, Indiana Memorial day 2016
"Whoa...I think we're back kids Mike - Mike honey are you with us?"
"Right here Frankie waiting on you."
"Dammit Axl if I had half a mind I'd go right back through that time door whatchamacallit and get my darn drink...YOU OWE ME BIG MISTER!"
"Alright Mom whatever."
"Hey, watch your tone get in the car."
"Hey son, you think it's a you know real deal with this girl...I mean - you know?"Mike says in a deep father son moment.
"Ummmm, well Dad long distance relationship thing really isn't my style but you never know."
"Just askin' Axl, before you go off slipping through these time thingy doors, just looking out for my guy...don't want to lose you just yet Axl." Mike says wiping a small tear from his eye.
"Ahhhh, don't worry dad not ready to dump out the old oats just yet...Love you too dad...got the keys?" Axl says playfully punching Mike in the sholder.
"oh no Axl I'm driving - come on get in the car kids and you Frankie I just wanna get home and watch TV...come on snap to it." Mike says his hands white knuckled on the steering wheel.
"Alright - alright see if I do anything cool for you squares again, lets all head back to snores-ville."
"watch your sass... ass!"
The Heck's head back to Orson with Frankie already forgetting half of the mind blowing adventure passed out sleeping off her drinks. As for Mike he snaps back quick the Colts the only thing on his mind and for Brick he's lost in the pages of planet nowhere and Sue well Sue is Sue she's thinking about her posters...I guess.
"Dad I need to go to the restroom."
"NO BRICK, HOLD IT!" (the family says in unison)...I think this will go down as one of the Hecks best if you don't count founders day feast...well you can't win them all.
The End.
