The roses you left me, are slowly fading to grey
Adam couldn't sleep.
Just another sleepless night since Lawrence left him.
Your coat on the chair and the scent of your hair I miss
He was pretty used to it by now.
A stupid fight, some vodka, and lots of swearing.
That's how he got here.
The clock on the wall it reminds me of all the better times
"You're so childish, you know that Adam?"
When we walked in the park and we whispered in the dark
"Then dump me! I don't care!"
Yeah we laughed and cried
Adam and too much alcohol wasn't really the best combination.
Why did he always had to mess things up?
Fuck.
Without your lips on mine
No the sun doesn't shine and no I can't breathe
Adam rubbed his neck, staring at the clock at the nighttable.
3:36 am.
I can't breathe
"You know what, Adam? Maybe we should take a break. Like, a real break."
"Uh. You're overreacting Larry."
"And now I'm overreacting. Adam, you're drunk.
And I don't like it."
"Whatever..."
Your words are a symphony music that sings to me,
no I can't breathe
"Goodbye Adam."
I can't breathe
Lawrence had been gone for over four days now.
And Adam were going insane.
Without Lawrence he didn't know what to do anymore.
I can't breathe
But Adam wasn't just acting selfish and stupid when he was drunk.
He also had very much confidence. And sometimes too much.
Oh, I walked by the store where we sat on the floor and we ate like kings
"Yeah, just go Larry, I don't need you anyway."
Then someone said hey
We're locking the door
No time to play
Adam punched himself in the back of his head.
One time.
Two times.
Three times.
He just punched and punched, over and over again
until he sat there, with tears
coming down his cheeks.
He regret it. Everything.
Everything he said that day.
Fuck.
And I never knew alone,
Wherever you are is home
"Why, why, why?"
Adam talked to himself, as he listened to the clock, slowly ticking.
"Why are you such an asshole?"
He sobbed and rubbed his back once again.
He listened to the clock ticking again.
3:58 am.
Without your lips on mine,
No, the sun doesn't shine
Adam had been trying to reach Lawrence.
Over the phone, text messages, everything.
But nothing.
Lawrence were still mad.
Would he ever come back?
Adam closed his eyes, started thinking.
He tried to think of what he would do.
But all he could think about was Lawrence.
And no, I can't breathe
Adam looked up in the ceiling, staring at the white colour that covered the ceiling and the rest of the room.
His eyes were red, blood red.
Not only because of he was crying, but also of tiredness.
His eyes slowly went down from the ceiling,
down to the floor.
He kept on staring at the floor, as a new tear went down
his cheek.
I can't breathe
He closed his eyes, thinking about
his shitty, unworthy life.
Why didn't he die in there?
In the bathroom.
Even if it would be a painful
death, he would deserve it.
Your words are a symphony
Music that sings to me
He slowly opened his eyes, blinked a few times.
Then he sighed. Deeply.
"Lawrence I miss you."
He said, wishing that Lawrence could hear him.
No I can't breathe,
I can't breathe
Adam reached over and turned the little lamp
that stood on the nighttable off.
His digital alarm clock gave away a little light
from itself.
And now the time showed
4:10 am.
It's not, it's not over
Adam layed down in his uncomfortable bed.
There was a big bed, and on the other side of it
Lawrence used to sleep.
Adam looked over at the other side
and imagined Lawrence laying there.
Lawrence, giving Adam a kiss on his head,
saying "Goodnight, I love you", smile, and then
lay down to sleep.
Oh you are, you are my lover
Oh how Adam missed Lawrence.
Adam closed his eyes, sighed and
decided to get some sleep.
Don't say it's over
Lawrence, please...
Come back to me.
Adam thought to himself, and felt the tears
coming down his cheek again.
He ignored them.
Just let them drop down on the bed.
And as Adam slowly fell asleep,
he missed Lawrence more than he ever had did before.
Don't say it's over
