Note: I'm reposting this story from my AO3 account. It was originally posted on 9-7-2017.


Sic Gorgiamus Allos Subjectatos Nunc


The burger was perfectly cooked. It had just the right amount of pink in the middle and none of that gross tasting black char on the outside, and when Karma d'Argento bit into it, the juices dribbled down her chin. She closed her eyes as she chewed so as to better focus on the flavor. It tasted perfect too. Grace had never been able to provide anything even half as good; yes, Karma was definitely moving up in the world. She washed the bite down with a sip of soda and then licked her lips too enjoy the faint sheen of grease left behind by the meat. She took another bite.

"You know that's made of people, right?" a voice said from across the table. It was Garrett, dashing Karma's hope that if she ignored the smug little dipshit for long enough then he would take the hint and go away.

"Bullshit," Karma said around her partially chewed mouthful. She glowered at Garrett as she swallowed, staring him right in the eye as she took another bite to show exactly how unconcerned she was by his pathetic attempt to get a reaction out of her.

"No, I swear to god, it's true," Garrett said, smirking as he watched her chew, swallow, and then take another bite. "All the meat served in Heart Enterprises cafeterias comes from employees who failed their performance reviews."

"Do you realize how pathetic you sound right now? Really," Karma said, "you should stop while you're, well, not ahead, because it's already too late for that, but you should really stop digging yourself deeper into that hole of how wrong you are."

Garrett leaned forward and, in what he probably thought was a conspiratorial manner, stage-whispered, "I can arrange a tour to show you the processing rooms. I personally oversaw the committee that upgraded their efficiency protocols last year." His near-perpetual smirk stretched into a full grin as he leaned back in his seat once more. "You're eating people right now," he declared, like he'd just achieved checkmate in a chess tournament. Idiot.

Karma laughed in his face. "You think you can disgust me? God, you really don't know anything!" She took another bite and chewed, then washed it down with another slurp of soda. "I've seen your stupid harvesting rooms, and if you think they're operating with anything even resembling good efficiency, then that's just one more piece of proof for how much you suck at your job," she said. "Also, the meat harvested from failed performance reviews only goes to stock the cafeterias for level three employees and below. This," she waved her half eaten burger in Garrett's general direction, "came from the executive dining lounge. The food up there's a whole different story, not some ground up rando loaf."

"It's sweet how naive you are if you think that means you aren't still eating people."

"No, dumbass, I'm not eating people. I'm eating a person, single source, free range, picked him out myself, because he never knew when to shut up and thought his stupid little male dominance games were subtle." Once again, Karma stared Garrett right in the eye as she took another huge bite, holding the burger at just the right angle for some of the juices to go running down between her fingers and drip onto the plate. "Oh, yeah," she added after swallowing, "while he was squealing and begging for mercy, he claimed that he was a friend of yours, Billy, or Bobby, or Tommy, or something like that. Whatever his name was, you're gonna need to find a new golfing buddy." She took another bite.

Garrett, not smiling anymore, finally took the hint and left.

Karma licked her fingers clean and continued to enjoy the last bit of her lunch. Whoever he had been, he really did make for a topnotch burger. Apparently it was true that the best patties were made from assholes and trimmed fat. She contemplated adding Garrett to the executive dining lounge menu next, but decided against it, because she didn't want to give him the satisfaction of getting under her skin, either metaphorically or literally. No, when Garrett's turn came, he was going in with the failed performance reviews to feed the low level wage slaves. But first, though, there were still a few matters where he might still be slightly more useful to her alive than dead. With that in mind, Karma finished the last of her soda, daintily wiped her mouth on her napkin, left her dishes on the table, and headed back to the boardroom.

She had a sister to punish and a company to conquer.

The End