I do not own the Nostalgia Critic. I also do not own "Twas the Night Before Christmas". (I don't think anyone does, really.)

Admittedly, this story makes no sense. It's not even a story, it's just a parody of "Twas the Night Before Christmas". I realize this isn't really even a good poem, but give me some credit… it rhymes! So, here we go!

It twas the night before Christmas

And all through the house

Not a creature was silent

Not even a mouse.

Crappy movies were placed by the chimney with care,

With hopes that the Nostalgia Critic would soon be there.

The fans all snuggled up, all comfortable in their beds

While some Nostalgia Critic episodes played in their heads.

I in my room, watching my computer

My brother had snuck out hours prior, probably at Hooters.

I sat at my computer desk, laughing away

Screaming repeatedly,

"I Was Frozen, Today!

When out of the yard, I heard someone swearing

I paused my computer, listening, daring

I ran to my window, as fast as I could

To see the guy who had a gift for speaking only in curse

The scenery was beautiful, from my apartment not so high

But it was also cold, so I had to close the window with a sigh

I never did get a clear look at the man

But he still cursed as loud as he can

I went back to watching the episode and laughing

Paying no attention to what was actually happening

When I opened my eyes to the outside world

I nearly passed out, and I didn't say one word

Who in my humble eyes should appear

The Nostalgia Critic, not so full of holiday cheer.

"Hi" I said quietly, he turned around

"This movie is shit! It belongs to you now!"

As he left, still swearing, and cursing at once

And as he walked out the door I yelled,

"Merry Christmas!"