Chapter One

Brandon slowly descended the stairs and moved toward the kitchen. His night had been full of dread and sleepless hours. He heard the words over and over again as if each time it drove another nail into his coffin. He never wanted to stand in her way and he hadn't. At the same time he never knew it would hurt this much to lose her forever. As he walked into the kitchen his mom was standing at the table drinking a cup of coffee. With out a word he grabbed a cup and poured himself one.

"What do you think you are doing?" Stef asks.

Brandon stares at her for a moment and walks out back sipping his coffee. He knows she will follow him but he isn't in the mood to talk. He sits on the bench by the tree and slowly allows his mind to hear those words that changed his life for good. 'Congratulations Callie you are now and Adams-Foster.'

"B what has gotten into you? You know we don't allow you kids to drink coffee." Stef tells him.

Brandon looks at her shrugs his shoulders and takes a drink of the brown liquid. He looks away and again hears those words that have haunted him for the last week and a half.

'So there is nothing romantic going on between you and Brandon Foster?'

'No your Honor that is over.'

'Congratulations Callie you are now and Adams-Foster.'

So glad she could just turn it off like it never happened. I thought I could as well, but that was just a fantasy. Ever time I see her I remember Idyllwild and what we did there. I remember her sneaking into my room, 'I just wanted to see you. I should have said this at the cabin. I Love You.'

Funny way of showing it. I think she just used me again to make herself feel better because she thought the adoption was off yet again. Of course it wasn't and once again good old Brandon has to take it on the chin as she turns her back on me. How many times was I going to fall into the same trap? Allow myself to feel for her what I do and probable what I always will feel? How much is to much? Where do I draw the line as to when there is no going back?

'Now would be a good time.' His mind tells him.

Could he really just walk away from it all? Walk away from her? Why should he care? It was plain she really didn't feel the same for him as he did for her.

"B you have to talk to me. I know something is up. Did something happen at camp, you didn't lose your spot to play at Disney hall did you?" Stef asks.

Again he just looks at her and slightly shakes his head no. he then gets up and walks back inside finishing his coffee. He rinses the cup and places it in the dishwasher. Walks past a baffled Stef and starts up the steps just as Callie is coming down them.

"Hey, how was your night?" She asks him.

He just walks past with out a word. Like he didn't even hear what she asked. His head hung low as if the world was slowly crushing him.

"Brandon did you not hear me?" Callie asks.

He continues up the stairs and she hears his door close. She looks toward his room for a few moments longer, before she walks into the kitchen seeing Stef standing at the table with a puzzled look on her face.

"What has gotten into Brandon?" Callie asks.

"Not sure love. Seems like since the competition he has drawn into himself. I thought that maybe he had lost his spot for some reason. But when I asked he just shook his head no. I have no clue as to what is going through his head or how to help him." Stef says.

Callie listened to what Stef was saying but her mind was working on another reason why he could be acting this way. It seems like since her adoption he had really gone down hill.

'That can't be it.'

'what is that?' A voice that sounds a lot like Rita asks.

'Cause he said he was fine with it. Said this is my family.'

'And you believed him?'

'Why wouldn't I? He seemed fine when we had that talk.'

'Did he seem fine when you sneaked into his room and told him you just wanted to see him and that you loved him the night before the adoption?'

'Yeah he told me he loved me too. He seemed content.'

'Are you sure? Did he really seem content? Or did he seem like he was hoping you where there to tell him that this time despite what others may want you were going to choose him?'

'Why would he want me to do that? He knows I need a family more than a boyfriend.'

'Is that all you see him as is a boyfriend? I mean deep down where only your dreams live, is that all he really is? Besides don't you think that argument is redundant now?'

'Redundant? How is needing a family redundant?'

'What are Robert, Sophia and Jill? What about Rita? Are those not also the definition of what a family is?'

'Not like the Fosters are. I guess in a way they are like my family as well.'

'Nice way of avoiding the true question. Let me ask you this. What was it you told Brandon when you went to see him just before your first attempt at getting adopted?'

'I told him that I felt like I was making his life harder cause of me being there.'

'Nice try but that is not all is it?'

'Fine I told him if there was one thing that could make me blow up the adoption was if I was hurting him. I then asked if I was hurting him and he said no.'

'Did you ask him that this time? Or did you just assume that his answer was going to be the same?'

'Oh My God this is all my fault! He is hurting cause I turned away from him just to get adopted. I stood there and said I was going to do right for foster kids, people who mean nothing really to me. Then turned around lied to the judge to get adopted. Once again leaving him behind!'

"Callie, hey Callie. Earth to Callie!" Stef says.

"Huh? Oh sorry was just trying to figure out what might be wrong. What was it you asked?"

"I just asked if you might know what was wrong?" Stef asks again.

"I am not sure I am working on it though. If I find anything out I will let you know." Callie says as she heads for the stairs.

"Please do." Stef says back.

Callie made her way to Brandon's door. She stood there for a second wondering if this was the right thing to do here at the house. Having no other option she knocks on the door. Only to get no answer. She knows he is in there she heard him earlier close his door, so she knocks again. Still no answer, she opens the door and looks in. the first thing she sees is a crumpled up paper laying near the trash can, on the top is says Outlaws. Then she sees Brandon slumped at his keyboard.

'Ok that settles it.'

'Told you.'

'Shut up already, I get it!'

"Brandon?" Callie says.

His shoulders stiffen ever so slightly. In fact if she hadn't been watching him so closely she may have missed it. No sooner than they do and they return to the slump. She sees him turn his head toward her. He raises his eyebrow at her. As if asking who said to come in.

"Can we talk?" She asks.

He shrugs his shoulders and turns back to his piano. He begins to play a very sorrowful piece as she walks closer to him. She listens for a moment knowing he is talking loud and clear. What he is saying is you did it to me again, only this time you cut me to the very soul of my being.

"Brandon it is a little hard to talk when you are playing." Callie says.

His only response it to continue to play only a little fast. She watches as his finger dance on the keys as if his fingers and the keys were one. His talent had always amazed and impressed her. Even with his hand damaged and not having complete feeling in it he could still make the piano talk to people. Make them feel what he wanted them to feel just by playing. She could feel the sadness in every note he played as if it was her own. When she unplugged it she was close to tears.

"Brandon please talk to me. I know you are hurting. Maybe if we talk about it you won' hurt as much. Damn it Brandon talk to me!" She swings his chair around to where he has to look at her.

What she sees takes her breath away. First there is pain, more pain than she ever thought to see. Then something that completely shocked her, Anger, Rage and what could almost be called hatred. His eye were dark and almost frightening. He quickly stands up to face her and walks toward her as she slowly backs up.

"Brandon, I know I hurt you but you have to stop this. We can talk about it. Figure out some way to help you. Just don't be this way." She says.

She realizes she is now standing in the hallway as he had backed her completely out of his room. He looks her in the eyes and then shakes his head looks down and then back at her. Looking her strait in the eyes he speaks to her for the first time in days.

"This is the Brandon your actions have created. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. So enjoy what you have created, now leave me the fuck alone." With that he closes his door leaving Callie standing in the door way with her mouth open, her head spinning and her heart breaking for the person she knew she still loved.

Slowly the tears came to her eyes as she continued to stare at the closed door. She knew she had to do something to help him. She just wasn't sure what yet. He had so much anger and hurt inside of him. Could she really have caused all of that? Why hadn't he just told her how he really felt. She would have blown the adoption up In a second. Again the light bulb went off.

She remembered back to the first year she was there and that guy who hurt his hand had set her up. He had taken the blame to save her even after she had lied and said she had sex with Wyatt. Even back then he loved her so much he was willing to go to jail to save her. And here she stood when the one time she could have showed him just how much she did truly love him, she turned her back on him and lied.

There is no words to express the deepest regret of her life that she was now feeling. She should have told the truth. She should have been honest, but most of all she should have shown him how much she loved him.