Suffer, Arc I: Heroes' Demise
Summary: With the Mario Bros. missing, and a new, sinister threat looming, Parakarry decides to round up all of Mario's old partners so they can find Mario and face this new enemy head-on before it's too late.
A/N: I'm just gonna say this now so I won't have to put up any warnings in the future: this is not going to be like With Big Shells and Wings. This isn't going to be as funny or as happy. It's going to be darker, it's going to be bloodier, it's going to have sexual content in it, swear words aren't gonna be censored, and more than likely it's going to be grosser than With Big Shells and Wings. Characters are going to be killed off in the story. And when I say killed off, I don't mean they die and then come back to life due to magic or life shrooms. I mean they die and they stay dead. So now that all that's been established, let's get on with the story, shall we?
The New Hero
Tweeting. Everytime he flew over there, all he could hear were the beautiful sounds of the birds tweeting and flapping their wings. The sounds always made him feel happy; he always knew that upon hearing the lovely sounds, he'd be getting closer and closer to greeting the famous Mario Bros. Now the noises were irritating, a reminder that the glorious plumbers weren't there, and haven't been for weeks now. Parakarry almost didn't want to fly over to their house, but someone had sent another letter to them. It was his job to deliver the mail, no matter what. So the paratroopa flapped his wings over to the plumbers' house and hovered in front of the white mailbox with a blue top. He took out a letter and sighed as he stuffed it into the slot. Or rather, he tried to, but the letter wouldn't go in. Parakarry heard the letter crinkle as he stuffed it forward over and over again; it wouldn't go in. The mailbox was filled with too much unread mail. Some of the letters were bulging out of the slot, and the mailbox looked like it was about to explode. Parakarry scratched his head before he stuffed the letter inside with both hands, hoping that it'd stay in. Much to his surprise, it did.
"There we go," muttered the paratroopa.
As if to mock him, the letter popped back out of the mailbox and landed right on the ground. Parakarry closed his eyes and exhaled.
"This is ridiculous! I know the Mario Bros. take a vacation every once in a while, but three weeks? Shouldn't someone at least be here to look after the house?"
Parakarry heard more incessant tweeting in the trees and grumbled. The letter wasn't inside the mailbox, but it was delivered. If the Mario Bros. didn't return in time and some wild animal ripped the fallen letter apart, that was their problem, not his.
"Forget it. They'll…I'm sure I'm just worrying too much. They'll come back eventually…they have to."
Parakarry returned to the post office to collect more letters to deliver. As always, no one was inside besides the Postmaster. The paratroopa hovered his way over to his boss and talked to him about the mail he had to collect.
"Got any more letters for me?"
"Of course I do. You know the letters keep coming faster than you can deliver them."
On any normal day, Parakarry might've pointed out his boss's condescending remark. But right now, the paratroopa didn't care; he was starting to feel a little depressed. The Postmaster picked up a large sack full of mail and took out several letters. He handed them over to Parakarry, who subsequently stuffed them all into his mail carrying bag.
"Thanks."
"…I take it they still weren't there," said the Postmaster.
Parakarry huffed. "I'm trying not to panic, but it's been three weeks now. The Mario Bros. usually aren't gone for this long; even if they are, they usually bother sending someone an e-mail, a message or something. Princess Peach told us that they were on vacation, but…something doesn't feel right here."
"Perhaps they need time to relax and don't want to be bothered with another crisis."
"That's just it: I feel like something really bad is about to happen. The Mario Bros. not being here leaves the Mushroom Kingdom wide open for invasion. How long do you think it'll take before some evil entity swings by and tries to destroy Toad Town, or kidnap the princess again?"
"Parakarry, it's over. The princess is safe. The Mario Bros. are fine. There's no evil threat out there; there's no one who wants to take over or destroy the world. You're not in the middle of a war or an adventure anymore, so stop acting like you are and relax. All you need to focus on is your job. So just do it and stop panicking."
Parakarry closed his eyes and exhaled. "Yes, sir."
The paratroopa opened the Post Office door and flew outside. He dug into his mail carrying bag and pulled out a letter that was conveniently addressed to Princess Peach. The paratroopa turned and looked at the giant blue gate with a star on it that led straight to her castle. Perhaps she could provide Parakarry with more answers.
Parakarry was still surprised at how it all happened. According to Peach, she snuck past the guards who captured her, and then got away from Bowser's castle when some magical dragon appeared out of nowhere and flew her to safety. A lot of Toads questioned Peach over and over again, wondering why the Mario Bros. weren't with her and where they were at. But the princess told everybody over and over again that shortly after she escaped, she discovered that the Mario Bros. were on their way to rescue her, but she got out of Bowser's castle before they could arrive. She then sent a message to their Mailbox SP, and upon reading the message, they quickly defeated Bowser to prevent another takeover of Mushroom Kingdom, and then decided that they would take a vacation in a city that Peach unsurprisingly knew nothing about. Several citizens were surprised with the story, while others merely accepted it and were glad that Peach was back safe and sound. But Parakarry was one of the few citizens who refused to believe Peach's odd story. Now would be the perfect time to get some answers. Parakarry hovered over to Peach's glorious castle and opened the front door. Inside, everything was utter chaos.
Several of Peach's guards were busy running around with stacks of paper in their hands. Most of them seemed to be carrying various maps or books that were all about certain islands or palaces located in the Kingdom. Parakarry looked at all the guards and raised an eyebrow questionably. He flew over to one of the spear-carrying Toads and asked him a question.
"Um, Princess Peach is upstairs, right?"
"Yes, just go up a few floors and you'll find her."
"Did something happen to her? You guys—"
"I assure you, the princess is fine. If you don't have a letter to give her, I'd advise you to leave."
Parakarry sighed. "Okay, okay, I'm going."
The paratroopa flapped his wings and flew all the way up to the main corridor in Peach's castle, the same one Mario fought Bowser in when the diabolical beast had taken the Star Rod. It was much quieter in the corridor, but Parakarry could see that Peach was talking to one of her guards loudly. The paratroopa slowly flapped his way over to the Toad and the princess, waiting for them to stop talking.
"I'm sorry, Princess, but we didn't find anything."
The blonde-haired princess rubbed her head and started pacing back and forth. "You sure? You checked all over Corona Mountain? You didn't see any castles or any sign—"
"We scoped the entire mountain three times, Princess. Some of our Toads were beginning to lose health from all the heat; we had to leave before we lost any men. We didn't see any castles there; it was all just lava. I'm sorry, Princess."
Peach sighed heavily and shook her head. "Thank you…just keep looking."
"We're on it!"
As the guard began to walk away, the princess sat down in a chair and rubbed her forehead again. She looked tired, almost as if she hadn't slept for the past two nights. She didn't even notice that Parakarry was there until she heard him flapping his wings over and over again.
"Oh, Parakarry. I take it I have a letter?"
"Um, yes," said the paratroopa, as he took it out of his bag. "You seem a bit stressed…everything okay?"
The princess didn't even bother reading the letter. She set it down on a nearby table and sighed. "No, Parakarry. You have no idea how hard it is to rule this kingdom."
"You mean with the Mario Bros. on vacation and all."
"Yes…vacation…"
Parakarry stopped flapping his wings and stood on the floor. He sighed as he walked over to the princess. "I'm gonna go on a limb here and say they're not on vacation."
"…No. I don't know where they are. They might be dead for all I know…"
Parakarry's eyes grew wide. "The famous Mario Bros. might be dead and you didn't even bother to tell anyone?! Exactly what happened when you got captured by Bowser?!"
"This is exactly why I didn't tell anyone! If I had, everyone would've started panicking; I can't have the residents of Mushroom Kingdom in uproar on top of the fact that the Mario Bros. are gone!"
"So you lied to everyone and…what? You just made up some ridiculous story for the sake of making everyone happy?"
"I needed to keep everyone calm; I still do. For the past few weeks I've been trying to find Mario with the help of my guards. But so far, we've found nothing. I can't remember where Bowser's castle was, and even if I could, I doubt the Mario Bros. are still there."
"Why didn't you ask anyone for help?"
"…I just wanted to do this on my own, Parakarry. I wanted to make things right. When I was in Bowser's castle, this guy just…he pretty much told me that I'm nothing more than a damsel in distress, that I always get in trouble, that I'm utterly useless. And despite how cruel his words were…he was right."
"You know that's not—"
"The Mario Bros. are in danger because of me, Parakarry!" said Peach, her voice cracking. "They only went on their adventure for the sake of rescuing me, and now they're missing, probably dead! If I hadn't been so careless then I wouldn't have been captured in the first place and the Mario Bros. would still be fine! This is all my fault, Parakarry…"
The princess sniffled and wiped her eyes just as tears were beginning to roll down her face. The caring paratroopa blinked and grabbed both of Peach's hands in an effort to comfort her.
"You're not the one who's responsible for whatever predicament the Mario Bros. are in now. You know that."
"But I didn't do anything to stop it! I could've went back and looked for them, and I didn't! I could've stopped all this from happening. I could've—"
"Shhh, just relax, okay? You can't dwell on the past, Princess. What's done is done. We just need to focus on trying to find them now, that's all that matters."
Peach sniffled and wiped another tear away. "All right…okay."
The paratroopa let go of Peach's hands. "So what really happened after you got captured?"
"Bowser had two of his guards escort me out of the castle. And then we—"
"Stop, okay—hold on."
Parakarry shut his eyes and rubbed his head slowly. "Bowser helped you escape his castle?"
The princess nodded. "He had to. If he didn't, his brother Trowzer would've kept me for one of his 'trophies.' I'm not even going to bother explaining what I mean by that."
"So—" Parakarry sighed heavily and rubbed his head with both hands. "Okay…so Bowser captures you, holds you prisoner, then lets you go so his brother—who's named after a pair of pants—won't keep you as his sex slave?"
"It's complicated, Parakarry. Bowser and his brother were having some bitter feud. Trowzer was trying to overthrow his brother; he raised his own army and slaughtered Bowser's, as far as I know."
"So there's a guy out there who defeated Bowser's entire army that's not Mario or Luigi, and you don't think the people should know about it?"
"I told you: I don't want to start a panic!"
"Is this Pantszer…whatever his name his—is this guy capable of burning this whole town to the ground?"
"Imagine Bowser if he had a brain and he wore a blue shell and had yellow hair."
"So the guy looks like a blue palette swap of Bowser from Super Smash Bros. Brawl."
"…I know it sounds ridiculous, Parakarry, but that's who this guy is. That's what he looks like. And if we don't stop him soon, Mushroom Kingdom will be in grave danger. That's why I've been trying to find the Mario Bros. We all need to band together to face him before it's too late."
The paratroopa sighed. "Okay, I believe you. It sounds…odd, but then again I've ventured off into a world full of talking flowers. I know you feel responsible and I know you want to do this alone, but you can't. You're gonna need more than a few guards to help you find Mario and Luigi, let alone deal with this Trowzer character."
"I'm assuming you're the one offering to help."
Parakarry smiled. "Of course, Princess! Me and Goombario and Bombette and all the rest of us have dealt with situations like this before! Mario might not be here, but all of his partners like Bow and Kooper can still band together again like we did before and look for him."
"You sure this'll work?"
Parakarry nodded. "The gang'll be thrilled to be back together again! 'Sides, my boss has been a pain in my you-know-what lately. I want to go on another adventure just to alleviate the stress."
The princess began to smile, glad that she finally had someone who might be able to offer some real help.
"Thank you, Parakarry."
"No problem!"
Parakarry's first stop was Goomba Village. He knew that Goombario was older and stronger now, definitely capable of joining him on his quest to find the Mario Bros. The paratroopa quickly flew over to the peaceful village, hoping that Goombario and his family were still there and not away on a trip. Lucky for him, all the goombas were still around, but they looked preoccupied. Parakarry scratched his head in confusion when he flew over to the goomba family's gate and heard hammering from the other side.
"Goompapa?"
The mustachioed goomba walked around towards the fence and saw Parakarry hovering outside the gate. Goompapa smiled. "Hey, it's Parakarry! Are Fishmael and the rest of the gang organizing another fishing trip?"
"Not this time. Actually, the reason why I'm here is because I need to speak to your son. It's urgent."
"All right, come in. I hope it's not too important though. We've been busy for the last few days."
Parakarry opened up the goomba family's gate and entered the family's yard. Goomama was busy talking to a couple of Toads; they seemed to be making some sort of building. The paratroopa hadn't visited the goomba family for quite some time and wasn't aware of what the family was currently involved in. Goompapa entered his house and disappeared for a brief moment. Parakarry flapped his wings for a few seconds before he noticed large sacks of goomnuts lying around near the house. He examined them for a few minutes before Goompapa came out of the house with Goombaria and Goombario walking alongside him.
"I told you, Goombaria: Dad and I do all the hard work, and you can stand around and count all the goomnuts we collect."
"But that's boring! I'm getting tired of…is that Parakarry?"
Goombario started to smile widely. He and his sister shouted with joy before they rushed over to greet the hovering reptile.
"Hey, Parakarry! Wassup?"
"Do you have any more letters or postcards for me?" asked Goombaria.
Parakarry shook his head. "Not today."
"Awww!"
Goombario snickered. "She's just upset that her secret admirer hasn't mailed her for the past few days."
"I am not! And-and he's not a secret admirer! He's just…a guy who likes me, that's all," mumbled Goombaria.
"Suuuuure he is."
"All right you two," said Goompapa, as he walked towards his children. "Goombaria, I think your mother could use some help measuring how long those wooden planks need to be. Goombario and Parakarry need to chat alone."
"Is it something serious? Maybe I could help out too."
Parakarry smiled. "I appreciate it, but I just need to talk to Goombario for now."
"Okay," said Goombaria dejectedly.
Goombario snickered again. "Make sure you go back to counting all those goomnuts I told you about."
"Be quiet!" snapped his sister.
As Goompapa and Goombaria walked away, Goombario and Parakarry headed over and talked to each other beside the tall tree carrying several goomnuts.
"So what's been going on? How's your job treating you?"
"Uh…would you prefer if I be blunt about why I'm here?"
Goombario blinked. "Did something happen with the princess again?"
"No, she's fine, but the Mario Bros. aren't. They might be in trouble, dead even."
"But I thought the princess—"
"That was a lie. She only said that because she didn't want everyone to panic. But I talked to her today, and she told me that Mario and Luigi might be in danger."
"Whoa! Are you serious?!"
"Yes. That's why I'm here. I need your help, Goombario; I need everyone's help. Bombette, Bow, Kooper, Sushie—everyone. We all need to get back together so we can look for the Mario Bros. before it's too late."
"Oh…I see."
"Your father mentioned something about you being busy?"
"Well…here's the thing, Parakarry," started the goomba.
Parakarry already didn't like where this was going. "You are too busy, aren't you?"
"It's not that I don't want to go. It's just, my family recently decided to open up our own shop here. We're gonna sell goomnuts to the public and make all sorts of food using goomnuts. Tayce T. isn't going to be around forever, and a lot of goombas and Toads really enjoy the nutty cakes and other desserts she makes, so Goomama decided to borrow one of Tayce T.'s cookbooks so she can learn how to make desserts on her own. We've been working on making the building for the past week now; it's going to take a while before it's finished."
"Is there any way you can take a break from helping your family? This is really important, Goombario. The world might be in danger!"
Goombario sighed. "I really wish I could help ya buddy, but I can't right now. I'm just too busy with my own issues and my family."
Parakarry tried not to look upset, but Goombario could definitely see it in his eyes. "Okay," he said solemnly.
"You know…this is the Mario Bros. we're talking about. They've gotten themselves out of tougher situations before. Hell, Mario defeated a demon! Helping him take down Bowser was nothing compared to that! And he managed to do it without our help; it's possible that the princess is worrying too much."
"Possibly. Well, thanks anyway. Maybe Kooper and Bombette can help me."
Goombario smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I'm sure they'll be able to help you!"
Parakarry turned around and flew away from the goombas' house. So far things weren't going as planned.
Parakarry's situation didn't get any better. When the paratroopa arrived in Koopa Village to go find Kooper, he discovered that the blue-shelled koopa was nowhere to be found. So the paratroopa visited Kooper's friend Koover, and he informed him that Kooper had been missing for nearly three weeks. Koover even told him that Kooper wasn't on one of Professor Kolorado's expeditions. Now Parakarry was even more worried; he had been gone just as long as the Mario Bros. Kooper was in danger too. Fearful about the rest of the partners, Parakarry rushed over to what used to be Koopa Bros. Fortress and quickly headed inside. Thankfully, he spotted Bombette working alongside various other bob-omb buddies; they were currently blowing up small sections of the castle.
"Make sure you don't blow up the stairs yet! We still need to demolish the upper section of the fortress!"
Parakarry cleared his throat loudly so Bombette would notice him. The pink bob-omb with the ponytail-shaped fuse turned around and noticed the mail carrying paratroopa.
"Oh, hello! Didn't expect to see you here! Do you have a letter for me?"
"Not exactly, but I need your help."
"Really? You need me to find some letters for you?"
"This doesn't involve letters, Bombette. It's about the Mario Bros."
Bombette scoffed. "I never expected them to take a vacation for this long. Eh, can't blame them I guess. Mario did save us all from some dark demon."
"They're not on vacation though. I think they're in trouble. I talked to Princess Peach today; she told me that the whole story about the Mario Bros. being on vacation was a lie. Truth is she doesn't know where they are. They could be in danger, Bombette."
"…And you want to find them and need my help."
"Basically, yes. Peach told me about this guy named, um, Trowzer or something—she told me that he's Bowser's brother and that he plans on taking over the world soon."
The pink bob-omb had to force herself not to laugh. Nevertheless, Parakarry saw her face twitch a few times as she stifled her laughter.
"Oh dear. I hope this guy doesn't smother us to death with pants."
"I know, I know—it sounded ludicrous to me too. But the princess is adamant about how dangerous this person is. She thinks this guy is going to try to take over the world soon; he's probably already started and we don't know about it yet. We're a flock of sheep, Bombette. There's a giant hungry wolf out there watching over us, waiting to strike, and we don't have a fence to protect ourselves. We need to find the Mario Bros. now before it's too late."
"Well, you're gonna have to do it without me."
Parakarry's eyes grew wide. "Why? How come?"
Before Bombette could answer, a blue bob-omb rushed over to the pink bob-omb and began to speak to her.
"Bombette, my love! The water in all the basement rooms has been flushed out! Bomb! What are your next orders?"
Bombette sighed with exasperation. "I told you, Bruce, I am not in love with you!"
The blue explosive snickered. "You can't fool me! Ba-bomb! I know that you're simply playing hard to get!"
"Bruce! I don't—" Bombette exhaled. "If you stop obsessing over me and go help Carl demolish the cell, I'll kiss you once we're finished remodeling the castle."
Bruce blinked. "Now what trickery is this? My love does not submit to demands so easily!"
"Okay, fine. I won't kiss you."
Bruce blinked again. "CARL! DO YOU NEED HELP WITH THAT CELL?!" he shouted as he ran away.
Bombette closed her eyes and sighed. "Sorry about him. Anyway, the reason why I can't help you is because I'm busy here with all the other bob-ombs."
"Doing what?" asked Parakarry.
"We're tearing down various parts of this fortress so we can rebuild it into a factory. We figured that it would be useful if we start making supplies for Toad Town. You know, metal beams, framework, rebar—that kind of stuff. Besides, if we turn this place into a factory, more Toads will have jobs; they'll be able to work here."
Parakarry flapped his wings more slowly. "Is that so?"
"Yeah! Doesn't it sound cool? Now everyone in Koopa Village won't have to worry about some renegade koopa taking this fortress back over. The bob-ombs and I were getting tired of the way this place looked anyway."
Parakarry sighed. "I'm guessing there's no other way I can persuade you."
Bombette shook her head. "I'm sorry, Parakarry. No offense, but I'm not worried about some guy who was named after a pair of pants. This is more important."
"…Don't you think we should prepare ourselves at least?"
"There's a difference between preparing ourselves and spending all of our lives in fear. Sure, Mario and Luigi might be gone, but it's not like we can't protect ourselves. We're not sheep, Parakarry; we know how to fight back. So if this pants-guy really does pose as a threat to us, we'll deal with it when the time comes."
"Right…sure. I'll, uh…I'll get back to my job. Got lots of letters to deliver and stuff."
"You okay?"
"I'm fine. I just thought you would've reconsidered, that's all."
The paratroopa sighed heavily and turned around as he flapped his wings. Bombette watched as the mailman headed towards the fortress exit and left the giant building.
Parakarry shut his eyes and rubbed his forehead, obviously irritated with the way his plan was going. Now the mailman was hovering inside Boo's Mansion, talking to the shopkeeper, Igor.
"You can't be serious! Bow's not even here?!"
The friendly ghost shook his head. "I'm sorry, Parakarry. You missed her just a few days ago."
"But—all right, where did she go? She couldn't have gone far, right?"
Igor sighed. "Alas, I do not know where she is. She left with a team of boos to travel around the world scaring as many people as she can; it's a family tradition, you see. We boos need to keep our reputation as being the scariest ghosts on this planet, if not the universe. We would rather not be labeled as 'cute' or 'cuddly'; we're boos for crying out loud!"
"How come you're not with them then? And what about that butler guy, Bootler? The last time he spoke to Mario, he practically had to beg Bow not to go with him and the rest of us to find Bowser and the Star Spirits!"
"And how did that turn out, Parakarry? She left anyway because she thought she could be of help to you and the rest of the world."
"But this isn't helping the world; she's just scaring a bunch of people to protect her image and all the other boos' images! I—this is ridiculous! I really need to speak with her!"
"I'm sorry man. She's not here. The only reason why I'm not with her is because someone needs to protect the mansion. But Bootler, Franky, Lady Bow—they're all gone. I was hoping Bootler would stay, but protecting Lady Bow is more important than making sure this mansion's in order, so he left too. 'Sides, with Tubba Blubba gone we got nothing to worry about."
Parakarry sighed heavily and shut his eyes. "Wonderful. I'm assuming that they won't be back soon."
"Not as far as I know. But if you want, I can tell her that you visited when she gets back. It's not too important, is it?"
"No," said Parakarry, dejectedly. "It's okay, don't worry about it."
"Oh. Did you want to buy something?"
"No, thank you. I'll see you another time."
Parakarry's hope in reuniting the partners was gradually dwindling. He almost didn't want to head to Shy Guy's Toy Box because he had a feeling that Watt would be busy too. Even now as the paratroopa hovered inside the toy box, he couldn't help but feel as though he was wasting precious time—time that should be used to deliver mail around the kingdom. But this new threat Peach warned him about seemed dire; Parakarry had to get the team back together so they could deal with this crisis. Parakarry was riding the toy train now, listening to the vehicle as it whistled and moved along the tracks very quickly. The reptile stared at all the blocks, wall doodles and childish architecture that had been constructed by the shy guys. Even if they were a bunch of mischievous creatures, they knew how to express their creative side—a side that Parakarry wished he was more in touch with. Instead, all he did was fly around the world handing letters to people. Somewhere along the line it finally hit him. The world was filled with creativity and splendor in even the most ridiculous of places. And now that Parakarry was stuck doing his job, he wasn't seeing it anymore. More importantly, if Parakarry didn't get the gang back together, this Trowzer guy would destroy the world, and he'd never get the chance to see wonderful sights like this again.
The paratroopa tried not to think too much. He tried to remain positive; he told himself that this was going to work, even if Goombario, Bombette, Kooper, and Lady Bow weren't with him. It had to work. The toy train arrived at Red Station and began to slow down. Eventually, the massive toy train stopped and hissed loudly. The conductor hopped out of the train and announced where Parakarry had stopped, in his loud booming voice, like always.
"Station stop: Red Station! Welcome to Red Station, passengers!"
Parakarry knew that he was the only passenger on the train, but he didn't point it out to the conductor. Saying "passengers" was a force of habit at this point in his job. Parakarry flew around the station briefly before he decided to head towards his right. The flying koopa troopa caught a lucky break; several li'l sparkies were hovering around a couple of resting shy guys and one anti guy. The paratroopa sighed with relief. At least Watt's here, thought Parakarry. The mailman smiled as he flapped his wings and flew over to the group of shy guys and li'l sparkies.
"Well, lookie here! I see someone grew out of her pacifier!"
The young female li'l sparky turned and faced Parakarry. Watt smiled as she rushed over to greet him. "Yaaaaaay, it's Parakarry!"
The li'l sparky and paratroopa quickly flew towards each other, but they didn't hug one another since Parakarry was well aware that touching Watt was no different from touching someone electrified with a volt shroom.
"So are you taking a break from the, um, post office place?"
"No, I'm still working there."
"Oh! Then I'm guessing that you have a letter for me?"
"No, not that either."
Watt started to smile again. "Aww, you must have come here because you missed me!"
Parakarry didn't want to jump into the situation so quickly. He really was glad to see Watt after such a long time; she seemed like the only friend who wasn't so obsessed with work or family. Part of him didn't want to involve her in this crisis; she didn't need to be hauled all over the kingdom yet again just to save two plumbers. Parakarry still wasn't even sure if they were in trouble. The paratroopa smiled at the li'l sparky.
"Yeah…I guess I have."
"Hehehe!"
"But, um, there's another reason why I came here today. I take it you haven't heard from the Mario Bros. for a few weeks now?"
"No. The princess said they were, um, on vacation or something. Right?"
"That's what she said, but it's not the truth. It was all a lie so she wouldn't make everyone in Toad Town panic. I think the Mario Bros. are in danger, Watt. The reason why I came to see you today was because I need your help in finding them. You're one of Mario's most valuable teammates; I think the two of us alone might be able to find him. But I wouldn't mind if Sushie and Lakilester joined us too."
"Hehe! I really do like that you think I'm valuable. Lots of other people do to. That's how I got a job with my mom powering up, um, machine thingies in the kingdom."
Parakarry blinked. "You-you have a job?"
"Uh-huh! We're like floating light bulbs—at least, that's what the shy guys say. Other li'l sparkies like me use our bodies to power up machines and to act as flashlights for dark places. It's nice to know that I can be helpful even when Mario's not around!"
Here it comes, thought Parakarry. "Yes, yes, that is quite useful. But would it be possible if you took a break from your job to help me instead?"
"Oh…I wish I could, but Mom said that now that I'm older, I have, um, responsibilities. I can't goof off anymore; she told me that she's trying to prepare me for when I become an adult. She's really proud that I helped Mario and you guys defeat Bowser, but I can't stay a kid forever. I have to grow up."
"But you are still a kid, Watt. I know you don't have a pacifier in your mouth, but throwing away your binky doesn't mean you're an adult. You barely even managed to correctly say 'responsibilities' just now!"
"I've been working on my, um, vocabulary," she said, pronouncing "vocabulary" slowly. "Anyway, I'm sorry, Parakarry. But I'm a little busy now."
Parakarry blinked and looked past Watt, noticing that all the shy guys were lazing around on the floor and breathing heavily.
"Yeah, sure, 'busy.' Those shy guys seem pretty laid-back to me."
"Oh, them. We're on break right now—I'm surprised you managed to catch me. We barely have time to come back to the toy box to relax! I think we have to leave again in, um, ten minutes."
"Why are you working with shy guys anyway?! They're the ones who captured one of the star spirits!"
"But these guys are different, I swear! They are a bit annoying, but they're not evil. General Guy's not here anymore, so no one's telling them to do bad things. They're quite funny and cute once you get to know some of them."
Parakarry was slowly but steadily getting irritated by all these excuses. "Don't you even care that the Mario Bros. are probably in danger?"
"Of course I do! But…they're the Mario Bros. Mario was the one who rescued me from that big mean ghost. If he can do that, let alone save the world, don't you think Mario and Luigi can probably free themselves from whatever problem they're in?"
"No, I don't. And you obviously don't care, Watt, otherwise you'd be helping me."
Watt started to feel down. "Please don't get upset. Um, what about Sushie? I'm sure she'd love—"
"No, she wouldn't, Watt! Why should I even bother asking her?! When Mario and the rest of us were searching for the star spirits, she got a letter from her daughter saying that she was going to be a grandmother. I bet you an entire coin bag that when I go visit Sushie, she's gonna tell me that she won't help me either because she's too busy taking care of her grandchild! Let's not even talk about those Yoshi kids she looks over on Lavalava Island. Admit it, Watt: you can't come with me because you don't want to. This whole thing about you having a job is just an excuse and you know it!"
"…I'm sorry…"
The paratroopa heard Watt sniffle and could tell by her face that she looked like she was about to cry. Parakarry calmed himself down and took a deep breath. There was no reason why he should've exploded like that, especially to someone as young as Watt.
"No, I'm sorry, Watt. I shouldn't have yelled at you like that. I'm just very frustrated, that's all. No one seems to want to help me, I…"
Parakarry stopped talking and sighed. "It doesn't matter…I'm sorry for upsetting you. Go back to relaxing with your coworkers."
"Okay…"
The two partners went their separate ways. Watt went back to relaxing with the shy guys whilst Parakarry headed to Red Station so he could take the train to the toy box's exit.
Parakarry had one shot left: Lakilester. Like he told Watt, there was no point in even heading to Lavalava Island. The paratroopa didn't feel like riding the whale across the sea just to get there, and he certainly didn't feel like venturing through the filthy sewer called Toad Town Tunnels just so he could take the pipe that leads to the island. Besides, he already knew that Sushie would give the same excuse as Goombario and everyone else. If she wasn't busy taking care of her family or doing some kind of job, then she was probably away like Bow was, doing miscellaneous activities in some area Parakarry knew nothing about. So the paratroopa headed through the portal leading to Flower Fields. He looked all around the place and blinked. The sun was shining and pretty flowers were blooming or calmly floating around in the air. None of it pleased the mailman. All he could think about was what would happen if Trowzer stumbled upon this magnificent plain and set it all on fire. It would be worse than what Huff N. Puff did. The mailman tried not to imagine a bunch of flowers screaming bloody murder and shook his head. He flew over towards the nearest bub-ulb he could find, making sure to avoid Tolielip.
"Excuse me," said Parakarry.
"Oh, Parakarry! Nice to see you again! It's such a fine day today, isn't it?"
The paratroopa forced himself to smile. "Yes, it is."
"Do you have a letter for me?"
This was practically becoming a broken record. "No. I need to see Lakilester. Is he around?"
"Yeah, he and his wife Lakilulu built a house just east of here, beyond Petunia's place. You can't miss it; it's right beside that well."
"Okay, thanks."
Parakarry didn't stop afterwards. He flew straight to the well, ignoring any flowers or crazee dayzees or bzzaps! that he stumbled across. He just wanted to find Lakilester, tell him about the situation, and then finally get around to finding the Mario Bros. The house that was built next to the well didn't look too expensive or complicated. It looked more like a simple one-story cabin; then again, maybe that was all Lakilester and Lakilulu needed. The paratroopa hovered in front of the cabin door and knocked on it a few times.
"WHAT!" shouted Lakilester.
Parakarry's eyes grew wide and he backed away. "Err…it's Parakarry. Do you think I could see you for a moment?"
Parakarry got no answer. He stopped hovering in mid-air and planted his feet on the ground, waiting to see how long it would be before someone opened the door. After a while, someone approached the door and exhaled. Lakilester opened the front door and stepped outside, leaving it ajar since he knew he'd have to head inside soon.
"Is this important?"
Parakarry blinked and looked at Lakilester. The lakitu, shockingly, was walking, not hovering around in his cloud. The lakitu wasn't wearing his sunglasses this time and was showing off his bloodshot red eyes. Parakarry was surprised that Lakilester was even wearing his shell; after seeing him in this state, he expected the lakitu to come out wearing nothing but a T-shirt and boxers. Lakilester blinked and rubbed his forehead, obviously getting irritated.
"Uh…are you okay?"
"No, I'm tired as shit. That's what happens when you knock up your wife and she gives birth."
The paratroopa smiled. "You're a father now? Congratulations!"
"Yeah, thanks," grumbled Lakilester. "Can't even ride my fuckin' cloud though."
"Why not?"
"I was holding my boy and…you know what, I'm not gonna retell all the gross and graphic details. So what do you want?"
Great, thought Parakarry. I'm pretty much screwed now. "I was gonna ask you if you could help me find the Mario Bros., but since you have a kid now, I doubt that's gonna happen…"
"Yeah, you're right. I have a hatchling now, Parakarry. I gotta be all fatherly and shit. What kind of dad runs out on his kid like that to go find two people? Besides, didn't Princess Peach say they were on vacation?"
"That was—" Parakarry huffed. "I don't have time to explain. Look…I-I don't have anyone else to turn to, Lakilester. Everyone else is too busy; they think the Mario Bros. are okay. But it's been three weeks now and no one's heard from them! Doesn't anyone other than Peach and her guards want to help me find them?"
"Why should we? They're the Mario Bros. man! And we have our own shit to deal with. I'm married and I got a kid. I can't spend all my time running around bashing up bad guys. And believe me, I want to. But you know how Lakilulu is…and with this kid, I don't know. It's like now I realize how fragile things are in my life."
"I-I…Lakilester, I know that you want to stay, but…there's a very good chance that a new threat is about to plague the Mushroom Kingdom! You-you have to help me buddy! You say you realize how fragile things are in life? Well, what happens when some evil force swings by and taints that fragile thing you love? What happens when someone worse than Bowser comes by and tries to hurt your wife, tries to hurt your kid?"
Lakilester snorted. "My wife and son are fine, thank you very much. And I'll be there to protect them. And as I just told you, I'm not hauling my ass across this planet just to find two plumbers who are busy slacking off in the sun."
"But this is important, Lakilester! People could start dying if you don't help me!"
The lakitu sighed and rolled his eyes. "Okay, now you're just exaggerating. You know what I think? I think that you want there to be trouble. I think that you're bored with your life because all you do is fly around delivering mail. Everyone else has done something with their life except you. You haven't moved on. You're not past anything. You don't know what to do with yourself so you go around being pessimistic and thinking that something bad's gonna happen, that we're all gonna die, that the world's gonna end. But let's face it: all you want—"
"Shut the fuck up," Parakarry snarled.
Lakilester raised an eyebrow. "What did you just say?"
Parakarry was practically shaking with anger. He had his right hand clenched into a fist and his breathing was shaky and loud.
"Fuck Goombario. Fuck Sushie. Fuck Bombette. Fuck all of you! All I fuckin' ask for is a little bit of fuckin' help! But none of you assholes care, do you? There's no crisis going on, so nobody gives a fuck! No one cares about anything dire until it happens! No one cares that we can prevent a massacre until the massacre is seconds away from occurring! It's all bullshit, Lakilester! It's all bullshit! Everyone's so fucking selfish when Mario's not here—we don't need him to guide us everywhere! We don't need him in our lives to be perfect! If Mario were standing beside me telling you that the world was in trouble, you'd pack up your shit and leave with us! But since there's no danger, all you fucking people make up excuses and say you can't go. But the truth is that none of you WANT to go! You're all a bunch of selfish bastards who care more about-about making nutty cakes and fuckin' factories and powering up machines than you do about what's going on in the rest of the world! I'm the only one who actually gives a shit! None of you care! None of you ever did!"
Lakilester stared at the enraged paratroopa, listening as he breathed heavily, his face red, his heart beating fast. The lakitu growled in his throat, trying to think of a way to retort Parakarry's caustic words. What he just said was uncalled for; he did care. They all did. But Parakarry was putting all the blame on him, acting like he was the sole reason behind the bad things he had been dealing with. As much as Lakilester wanted to shove a spiny egg up the guy's cloaca, he had more important issues to deal with. His family came first; if there was a crisis going on in Mushroom Kingdom, he'd deal with it when that time came. Lakilester sighed deeply.
"Do you have a letter for me?"
"Wh…no!"
"Do you have one for me wife?"
"NO! What does any of that—"
"Then get the fuck off my lawn."
And with that, Lakilester slammed the door in the mailman's face. Parakarry raised his fist and was tempted to bash the door down, but as he breathed heavily, he began to process his thoughts. The paratroopa's anger started to subside, and gradually began to turn into sadness. Parakarry lowered his fist and exhaled, feeling defeated. No one was going to help him. He still had Sushie to consider, but at this point, Parakarry didn't have the time or energy to go see her. The mailman just stood there, staring at the door as he heard crying from inside—Lakilester's son, obviously. Parakarry stood for a moment longer before he slowly turned around and began to walk away. His whole journey had been pointless.
Parakarry didn't address Minh T. when she saw how down the paratroopa was. He just walked through her garden, being extra careful not to step on any flowers. Parakarry regretted what he said to Lakilester—and to Watt, for that matter. Sure, he was frustrated, but he had no right to take all his anger out on him. And unlike most partners, his reason for not leaving was justified. He didn't want to leave his wife or his hatchling; he had a family to take care of. A family that clearly needed him now more than ever. The paratroopa exhaled quietly as he walked south through Toad Town, heading for the train station. There was nothing he could do now except go it alone and explore Mushroom Kingdom without any backup, without any protection…without any friends. He could've told Peach, but that only would've made her more depressed. She was already blaming herself for what happened to the two heroes in the first place. Parakarry figured it would be best if she didn't worry. The paratroopa passed the li'l oink farm and the playroom and headed right for the conductor. Like everyone else, he asked Parakarry a question so repetitive that the paratroopa was tempted to shove a letter in his mouth just so he would shut up.
"Hey, Parakarry! Do you have a letter for me?"
The paratroopa was just about to yell at the conductor when he opened up his mail-carrying bag and blinked. "Um…actually, yeah. I do have one for you."
Parakarry took a letter out of his bag and handed it over to the conductor. The Toad was pleased to receive his mail, but he was surprised that Parakarry didn't say anything afterwards.
"Aren't you forgetting something?"
"What?"
"'Another letter, duly delivered. A postman's job is never done.' You always say that after handing someone a letter."
"Oh. I'm not in the mood today. …Is this train bound for Mt. Rugged?"
The conductor nodded. "Yes, that's correct. Are you coming, Parakarry?"
Parakarry shrugged. "Yeah. Not sure where else to go."
The Toad knew that the paratroopa was feeling depressed, but he passed it off as him having a bad day. "Um, okay. The train is about to depart. Please board quickly."
The train driver opened up the door to allow Parakarry to get inside. He hopped into the train and shut the door, and the driver began to speak.
"Sit tight, folks. Now departing for Mt. Rugged."
Shortly afterwards, the train whistle blew and the locomotive became active. It started to move down the tracks slowly, emitting a slow chugging sound that began to get faster and faster as the train accelerated. Soon enough, the train was exiting Toad Town and going at full speed on the tracks. Parakarry put his arms on the railing near the back of the train and stared at the scenery whizzing past him. He couldn't get it out of his head. Today, flowers were growing; everything was lush and plentiful, totally serene and untouched by any hazards. But all Parakarry could see was fire as it burned everything to the ground, tarnishing anything remotely beautiful. He didn't understand where these feelings were coming from or why they kept filling his mind. But they were there, and they wouldn't go away. Somewhere in the Mushroom World, something very bad was going to happen. Partners or not, Parakarry needed to stop whatever it was from happening. The paratroopa stopped obsessing over what could become of the wonderful landscape and relaxed as he rode the K64. It wasn't long before the train arrived to a rocky area and began to slow down near another train station. The train came to a halt and let out a loud burst of steam. Parakarry opened up the door and hopped out into the station.
"Mt. Rugged! Mt. Rugged! Passengers heading for Dry Dry Desert or Dry Dry Outpost should proceed directly over Mt. Rugged from this station," said the conductor.
The paratroopa didn't talk to anyone and started to flap his wings. He hovered his way towards the beginning of the mountain, where he first bumped into Mario while looking for the three letters that he lost. The paratroopa didn't know what else to do but wander around, as though his nostalgic memories would give him an answer. He traveled forward, flapping his wings very slowly as he moved around the mountain with ease. The calming sound of the waterfalls made Parakarry feel a bit more relaxed, but he still wasn't any closer to achieving his goal. The paratroopa heard snickering nearby and saw a Monty mole poke its head out of its hole. Parakarry quickly jerked himself out of the way as it chucked a rock at him and blew a raspberry. He had no time dealing with the pest, so he just flew away and let the miscreant disappear back into its hole. Parakarry stopped flying near an area where Mario found one of his missing letters and sat down on a rock. The sun was setting and it was getting cooler. It wouldn't be long now before it was nighttime. Parakarry was sitting on the rock, thinking about what move to make next, when he yowled and felt a sharp pain in his rear end. The paratroopa hopped up and shouted.
"YOW! Son of a…stupid monster!"
The "rock" that Parakarry was sitting on was actually a cleft. It wasted no time morphing back into its true form and poking at Parakarry's behind. The paratroopa flew high into the air mere seconds before the rock-like monster could jam its spikes into him again. Fed up with the annoying monster, Parakarry hid inside his shell and performed his special Shell Shot move. Parakarry hit the monster so hard that it was hurled several feet backwards, off the side of the mountains. Parakarry heard the tiny monster scream as it fell hundreds of feet to the ground, disappearing somewhere near the waterfalls. Parakarry calmed himself down from the brief attack and took a deep breath. Exhausted and disheartened over everything that had happened, Parakarry pressed his shell against a cliff wall, and slowly sat down on the ground. The mailman rubbed his head and exhaled.
"I'll just…I'll wait here, I guess. Maybe Mario will come back here and…and find me."
Parakarry pressed his head against the wall and slowly closed his eyes. He listened to the sound of the waterfalls and slowly started to lose consciousness.
"I'll just wait here…"
Parakarry had no idea that slept all the way into the night. He had no idea that the mountain was practically barren, short of him and a few sleeping Monty moles. He also had no idea that something had found him and was looking down at him. A great big beast breathed heavily, staring down at the paratroopa with dangerous red eyes. It growled loudly and grinned, showing off a pair of serrated yellow teeth. The beast kicked Parakarry in the left leg, and the mailman slowly started to stir. His eyes twitched and began to open. The paratroopa could still hear the waterfalls, but it was dark all around him. The only light he had was coming from the moon. Parakarry groaned and fully opened his eyes. And then he shouted and started to breathe heavily when he saw the giant horned beast. Parakarry still couldn't fully see, but judging by the beast's large body and massive shell, it had to be Bowser. Or at least, someone or something that looked like him. The giant beast growled again and grinned as much as it could, pleased to see Parakarry so terrified.
"Hello," it said, in a deep but calm voice.
This couldn't be happening. Bowser—or someone who looked like him—was standing right there, alive and well, and clearly ready to take on Parakarry. Parakarry's journey was about to get a whole lot worse.
"…Oh, crap."
