The Man He Is
DISCLAIMER - You know the vast amounts of money, prestige and eye-candy that goes with owning Dr. Who and anything affiliated with Dr. Who? Yeah? Well, I have none of it. What does that tell you?
She made him the man he was.
The Doctor leant against the controls of the Tardis and stared at its golden walls without seeing them.
Instead he was rummaging around in that vast mind of his, torn between what he knew he should do – what it was his duty as a Time Lord to do – and what he actually wanted to do.
Rose was back.
Stepping between the worlds, searching for him – he knew that beyond a shadow of a doubt. By rights, he should wait until she was back in Pete's World and seal off that tiny crack she was manipulating to briefly let her through.
But she had literally made him the man he was.
All that bounding energy, passionate enthusiasm, manic joy, it was all gleaned from Rose when he drew the Time Vortex from her. Because, there was only so much that regeneration could do.
After the war, he'd been broken. In so much pain, truly alone for the first time in 900 years of life. There had always been the comforting presence of the others in the back of his minds, even when there was billions of years and galaxies separating them, he still had company.
But that desperate loneliness. Emptiness for the first time ever and the knowledge that he was somehow to blame.
The bitterness and hatred that he felt for every species in the universe because they weren't his.
And then there was Rose. Swanning into his life, all sunshine and adventure and such pure human innocence. He didn't want a companion, another stupid ape to drag around the timelines.
But she was so happy, so pure and trusting and he'd found himself inviting her to travel with him, only to be so relieved that she'd turned his offer down.
It wasn't until he'd nearly gotten himself killed 3 times on various planets in various millennia that he'd admitted to himself that maybe he did need someone. Someone to be there to remind him that there were other planets, other species, depending on him. That he could save something in the vast universe.
From the instant he'd gone back for her – seconds since he left for her, who knew how long for him – she'd started changing him.
Reminding him that there was more to live for than saving people. That it was alright to remember his people and his planet with a smile.
And then the sacrifice she had made, for him and for the whole of the human race. When he kissed her he didn't just take the Vortex, he took part of Rose herself.
He'd absorbed her love for him, her desperation to save him and her people, never mind the cost. The Doctor had taken part of every good thing that made Rose shine so bright, every kind word bestowed on her, every kiss from a lover, every happy moment with her family, he drank it all in.
So it was no wonder that he regenerated with a smile on his face and a spring in his step.
Puffing out his cheeks, he pushed off from the console and put his hands in his pockets, not bothering to reach for the trench coat draped over a railing on his way towards the door.
The crack was only a couple of streets away, beside some hornbeam trees. He stood in the late evening shadows and waited. Quite how he knew she'd be there any minute was a mystery even to himself but he never doubted it for a second.
The trees shimmered for a second, like a heat haze, indistinguishable to anyone other than him and then she was there.
Rose had her back to him but even after all this time it was unmistakeably her, all golden hair and brightness even in the dim twilight.
He didn't need to say a word, she turned of her own accord, a searching, half expectant look on her face before her eyes sought him out and a smile spread across her face. He'd missed that grin, the twin of his own.
Neither of them said a word, just grinning at each other in the middle of the street for several beats until someone or something shifted and suddenly they were in each others arms.
He knew he should tell her off, lecture her on the dangers of crossing between worlds, but right there in that moment, he couldn't.
Because she'd made him the man he was and the joy they both felt was overwhelming.
The End
