Chapter One

- Haylie's Point of View -

I tried pulling the thin long - sleeved Justin Bieber shirt tighter along my body and wiping the mascara streaks off my face, but it was useless. Just like the burning slices of depression I had spread all over my left arm - I didn't know how long I'd have to deal with them being there, but they were there for the time being.

I was walking down the cold, crowded yet ever so lonely streets of New York City, the last place I had ever swore to visit before I die. Lights were shining brightly from advertisements and signs high above my heads, people were rushing up and down the streets not even paying attention to the hopeless fourteen year old with make up smeared across her cheeks.

I never thought I'd be here, but here I was, thousands and thousands of miles away from my home in Canada alone, running away for a few weeks just to experience the good life. The old Haylie would be partying at a girls night out right now, not walking up and down the fearful streets of New York City always having to worry about shielding herself from the world.

I stopped at an intersection with cars passing wildly through the stoplights and thought for a moment. I could still feel my tired heart beating slower and slower by the second, tired of always being walked all over and being taken advantage of, tired of feeling so worthless and unhappy. I really just wanted all of it to end.

I had visited New York already, the one place I always wanted to travel to. But now that I was here and I could still feel the pain flowing through my body and especially my arms, it didn't seem all that great. Now meeting Justin Bieber, the one boy who ever managed to help me see another side of myself, that was something I hadn't done. But after giving the same call of help in my letters to him over and over again with no response and seeing the thousands of people tonight at MSG that wanted him too, I knew for sure, that meeting him was something I wouldn't ever be able to do.

"I'll meet you soon, never say never right?" I laughed heartlessly to myself in a whisper. I'm talking to myself, I thought. I really am going insane. "Well, quit dreaming Bieber!" I screamed, when a few people had started to stare. But the flaming emotions that overflowed inside me just couldn't be contained anymore. "Just because life turned out oh-so-lucky for you doesn't mean that it'll turn out right for me! Things are never going to look up for me, and I'm never going to meet you. There, I said it. Never, never, never!" I threw my arms up into the air. By now people had completely stopped to stare at me as if I were some kind of crazy cat lady.

Tears were flowing down my cheek and the same old adrenaline that drove me to cutting was only stronger than ever. This was it. I looked straight ahead at the passing cars who were driving fast enough just to do more than enough damage to a person's body. "What else do I have to live for?"

- Justin's Point of View -

"Are you kidding? That was amazing." I laughed with my mom.

She was smiling brightly today as always, as we were walking down the street just coming back from an Italian restaurant from a celebration of selling out MSG in twenty two minutes, something like that for a sixteen year old just doesn't happen.

The rest of the crew had left a few minutes before, but mom and I wanted to spend a little time together since lately I've been hanging around Chaz and Ryan so much. So here we were, walking up and down the streets walking in and out of shops at the familiar place I loved called New York City.

I stopped at an intersection when the red light turned green and cars started passing by when I noticed a fan who was screaming the word "never". Her back was facing me, but she had long, layered brown hair that flowed in the wind across her back, which may I add, her had my face on the shirt with the words "My World 2.0". It was definitely way too cold to be walking around here in just a shirt and jeans when I was in a jacket and way too dangerous to be walking around here alone when I was with my mom.

I was just about to walk up behind her to thank her and tell her to never say never, when she looked to the side and I caught a glimpse of her face and my heart stopped. Her mascara was running above her eyelid, down her cheeks even reaching her chin. She had a tired look in her eyes like she's been through the same thing over and over again. She took a step back, pounced up and that's when my mom tensed up, tightly gripping onto my arm and covering her mouth with her other hand.

One foot after another, there she was, running straight into the middle of the road. She looked straight forward at the cars, no fear at the angry faces and honks that the drivers were throwing at her.

And that's when it happened.

When a car hit her straight on, only stopping enough so that she fell to the ground, her head hitting the pavement and her feet slightly underneath the car which stopped right away. Without even a second thought, I rushed out into the middle of the full road towards her motionless body, freaking out about what I should do as I heard the sirens in the distance. Because conscious or not, the pain was still visible when her eyes were closed.