Written for the community sortinghatdrabs on livejournal - check it out!! It's very interesting. Winner of Mod's Choice.

Characters: Ron & Pansy
Prompt: Detention
Words: Less than 400

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"This is absurd. Isn't this absurd, Harry? Ron? This is absurd," stated Hermione in the tones of someone absolutely convinced of their overall greatness in life.

"Yes," said Harry vaguely. "Absurd."

"Mmhm," mumbled Ron. "Absurd."

It was absurd how messed up Ron's life was. Absurd. And there were so many different reasons for the absurdity that Ron couldn't even name them all. He decided, right then and there, to keep a list.

"Harry?" he whispered through Hermione's rant about the Ministry of Magic. "Do you have a quill?"

Harry looked at him blankly. "Why would I have a quill?"

"I don't know," Ron paused. "I just thought you'd have one."

"Oh," Harry said, and went back to staring off into space.

That was one of the reasons that Ron should put on his list. Not having a quill. That was rather absurd.

"-If Fudge would just realize how absurd he's being … what with all the deaths and disappearances you'd think someone might have noticed-!"

Having to listen to your so-called friend whine about politics; that was somewhat absurd. Or maybe it was just absurd that Ron was still sitting there. But, then again, Hermione knew some pretty good hexes, so that could just be good self-preservation.

But, even more absurd than all of that, was Pansy Parkinson. Ron was sure of it. She was the absolute definition of the word.

"Weasley!" Pansy snapped and Ron's head jerked up. "Get up! You're walking me to Potions."

See? Absurd.

Perhaps, though, what was even more absurd was that Ron did walk Pansy to Potions. He even opened the door for her.

"Weasley!" she snapped again as Ron was lowering himself into his usual seat. He stood up again quickly, almost knocking over his chair.

"Yes?"

"Get over here! You're my partner today."

And so Ron walked over to the Slytherin side of the room and sat down next to Pansy. Absurd.

When Ron blew up their cauldron – which was not absurd, it was absolutely ordinary – Pansy told Snape it was her fault.

"I'm sorry, sir," she said, blinking up at him.

"Detention," Snape snarled. "Both of you."

And while Ron was busy cursing Snape under his breath, Pansy was smirking. Utterly absurd. The definition of absurdity.

And when Pansy arrived at their detention that night, a good fifteen minutes late, and started kissing him, Ron decided that maybe things weren't so absurd after all. Maybe they were perfect.