title: once upon a time

pairing: teddylily

for: my virtual sisterinlaw, and one of my most favourite people ever, squishy [EllaBethh] – happy birthday, dearest! sorry about not being able to get the domscor up in time – hope brian isn't too upset.

note: slight swearing, some sexual implications – nothing too terribly offensive – unless you're, like, ten, in which case, gtfo this site, dears

I don't care for your fairytale,

You're so worried 'bout the maiden,

Though you know she's only waiting on the next best thing

-Sara Bareilles, Fairytale


once upon a time,

there was a beautiful girl named

p-r-i-n-c-e-s-s-l-i-l-y

.

one day,

princess lily

fell in love

with the handsome

prince theodore

.

(oh wait, scratch that)

((this is the story of teddyandlily, silly girl))

(((not some cliché fairytale)))

.

once upon a time, there was a

b i t c h

her name was

L I L Y L U N A P O T T E R

and she ruled the world

.

[or, most of the world]

.

she reigned under a rule of terror

and broke hearts for a living

[because that's what beautiful people do]

.

but, somehow, there was one couple that she could

nevereverever

b-r-e-a-k

[hello, teddyandvictoire]

.

some people were just too damn perfect

[blue (turquoise) and yellow (blonde) make slytherin green, baby]

and lilylunapotter can't stand

perfection

[in others]

.

but bottle up those emotions, darling

you can't let the world watch you

f-e-e-l

.

because, um, hello?

bitchy princess

feelings

hell to the no

.

she tries the usual

[low-cut tops and flirty grins]

and the unusual

[charming her hair blonde]

the expected

[cleverly mascara-ed crocodile tears]

and the unexpected

[real, proper, angsty teenage girl tears]

.

[n-o-t-h-i-n-g-w-o-r-k-e-d]

.

until, one day, scorpius malfoy, of all people, invites him to his seventeenth

and in a haze of

alcohol&drugs&peppermintkisses,

she finds herself pressed up against one

teddy remus lupin,

[not that either of them can tell at the time, as the firewhiskey's definitely settling in]

and she's lost in a flurry of

skinteethlegshands

[sex]

.

and for a few weeks, that stranger means nothing at all to her

[just another one, yes?]

until she finds herself looking at two little pink lines

and a toilet filled with vomit

[oh fuck]

.

and all of a sudden, little

lilylunapotter

isn't so innocent-looking anymore, isn't she?

.

she's lost in a whirlwind of

apologies&tears&anger

and, right now, it seems like all anyone is ever saying is

s-o-r-r-y

.

(I never meant for it to happen!)

(I swear, mum, I don't know who the father is!)

(I can't believe I was so stupid!)

.

and she's filled with memories of

f-l-a-s-h-i-n-g-l-i-g-h-t-s

broken bottles

turquoise hair

[shit]

.

so one dull, overcast morning, she shows up at his doorstep,

and proceeds to empty her stomach at his feet

[oh, hello there]

.

there's the usual

"hi"

"hello"

"how are you"

before she finally comes right out with it

.

teddy, the baby's yours

.

there's a string of reactions after that

[it starts with silence]

[then disbelief]

[then rage]

[terror]

.

and poor victoire, poor poor victoire

she comes home to a panda-eyed cousin and a furious fiancé

and all she can do is

c-r-y

(she's smothered in apologies, but it just doesn't matter anymore)

.

"please, victoire, it meant nothing"

"we never meant for this to happen"

"take me back"

(no)

.

they all go their separate ways then

[victoire keeps the house]

[teddy rents a flat]

[lily goes back to hogwarts]

.

and, fuck, she can't take the humiliation

but it's a lesson learned, isn't it?

she faces the taunts and jeers,

and the triumphant looks

because, dammit,

lilylunapotter just got

thrown

off of her

throne

.

and every night, she sits at the window, with her wand at her wrists

c-o-n-t-e-m-p-l-a-t-i-n-g

whether or not to do it

[she never can]

because everybody knows how much lilylunapotter adores herself

[only, not so much anymore]

.

lilylunapotter is

w-o-r-t-h-l-e-s-s

[homewrecker]

[whore]

[slut]

lilylunapotter is

n-o-t-h-i-n-g

.

until, one dreary afternoon

a little brown owl shows up at her window

(tap-tap-tap)

bearing a message from one

turquoise-haired bachelor

.

Meet me at the Three Broomsticks this Friday.

Love, Teddy

.

[LOVE, TEDDY]

.

and she goes, heart filled with hope and joy and love

but she's met with cold, angry hatred

(listen, Potter, don't go spreading around that the baby's mine)

(nobody else needs to know)

(goodbye)

.

and she runs back to the castle with her heart

s-h-a-t-t-e-r-e-d

and

b-r-o-k-e-n

[poor, lost little lilylunapotter]

.

and for a while, her life is nothing but

shambles&ruins&pain

.

all until one fateful day in the corridors after exams

"someone peed!" shrieks a first year

"the slut's going into labour!" cackles a sixth year

"floo st. mungo's" orders a teacher

[and there goes lilylunapotter, center of attention once again]

.

the damn thing takes thirteen hours to come out

[and lilylunapotter has never been happier to just f-a-l-l-a-s-l-e-e-p]

.

when she wakes up, there's a b-l-u-r-r-y mess of blue and red in front of her

"mum? dad? james?"

and she's surrounded by hazy confusion

.

when her vision finally clears, standing in front of her is one

t-h-e-o-d-o-r-e-r-e-m-u-s-l-u-p-i-n

carrying her baby

[her baby]

.

and he's smiling and waving, and all she can say is

"what the hell are you doing with my baby?"

.

he shoots her a puzzled look, one that quite clearly screams

c o n f u s i o n,

but he covers it up by brushing a soft kiss against her lips

.

"I love you, Lily Luna Potter."

.

and there it is

that defining moment

the whole damn reason she pushed a fucking watermelon out of her body

[him]

.

teddy remus lupin

.

"I loved you all along"

[had she ever stopped?]

.

they name the baby Ella

Ella Beth Lupin

[no namesakes, no living-up-to-the-name]

just her

[perfection]

.

victoire surprises them all by showing up a year later to ella's first birthday with one

professor longbottom

holding her hand,

and a glittering engagement ring on the other

and there would normally be a chorus of "what the fuck?" here,

but honestly,

after the teddyandlily debacle,

it's sort of a tradition to screw the family over every year


Holy fuck. That was six/seven pages on Microsoft Word. Longest freeverse ever, methinks.

You and Brian had better enjoy this, Squishy. I MADE IT HAPPY FOR YOU.

And, it might have something to do with the fact that it's two in the morning, but I'm really getting into Lily's character, and I'm thinking that I definitely wouldn't ever have accepted Teddy that easily. As said in one of my delirious reviews, Teddy was so cold. Like, uh, ice.

Wait a second…

It's two in the fucking morning.

I have school.

Shit.

Review?

-Drishti