The Sunnydale/ Austin Powers crossover… they made me do it. Complete
(knowing from personal experience how annoying it can be to wait ages for a
story to be finished ;)
Continue: This story takes place after lovers walk, Oz and Willow are back together and have been dating for a couple of months now!
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Willow frowned, "I just don't know what to get him." The two girls were sitting in the coffee pump discussing possible birthday gifts for Oz birthday.
Buffy didn't get what the big deal was. No matter what Willow gave him, he would love it, because it came from her. The words 'smitten' and 'whipped' definitely came to mind with their werewolf friend. "Well, lets think this through! What does Oz like?"
"Uhm... well I know he likes music." The red head smiled naughty, "And of course he likes me."
"Well there you go, we'll just have to find him another Willow, he could start a collection!"
Willow sighed, "Its just so frustrating! We've been dating for months now and I still know hardly anything about him."
Buffy gave her a comforting look, "Oz just isn't very chatty."
"Don't I know it! It took me three months, to get him to tell me his full name and I still don't know anything about his parents... I don't know if he even has parents."
"Oz has a full name? I always kinda figured he was just Oz." Buffy squeezed her eyes and examined her friend, "So what is his name?"
"Actually Buffy, it's a law that you have a last name." She took a sip from her mocha, "Daniel Scot Ozbourn."
"Weird."
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Oz walked into his house, hoping that he was alone, since he was supposed to be in school. Not that Alice made a big deal about that kind of stuff, since he was the air to an evil enterprise and even the legal sections where worth billions. Of course the whole geniality thing also helped, "He, is anybody there?"
Alice's head appeared out of the kitchen, "Scot. Your home early! Would you like something to drink?
"No thanks… and Alice, Could you please call me Oz? Everybody else does."
She raised an eyebrow, "Very well." She looked out of the window for a moment, "Your father send you a package for your birthday."
Oz frowned a brief flash of undefined emotion running through him. On one side he hated the man. Every time he showed up his life became complicated. It had taken him a lot of effort to build up a normal life. Then again, it was his father. That had to mean something didn't it? "Dad."
Alice waited patiently for what came next.
"He's not coming right?"
His aunt gave him a comforting smile, "I don't think so." She leaned against the doorframe, relief evident on his face, "Aren't you going to unpack the present?"
"Are you sure its not a bomb or something?"
"Don't worry I checked... what do you want me to do with it?"
"Throw it in the trash for all I care." Oz turned around and skipped up the stairs."
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Xander turned to Cordelia, "So we came together, maybe it's a sign?"
Cordelia stepped back disgusted, "Yeah it means you're an idiot. Do you really think I want anything to do with you now that I've recovered from my temporary state of insanity? Its just that Oz throws great party's, else I wouldn't even be near you losers."
"When you say recovered…? Xander began, but swallowed the rest of the sentence as the door opened, "He happy birthday man!"
Oz frowned at the sight in front of him, "You came together?"
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They three had been setting up stuff for the party for the past ten minutes (even Cordelia had helped a little… okay she gave directions) when Buffy and Willow arrived. "Hey guy's!"
Willow ran over to Oz and gave him a big hug, "Congratulations birthday boy!" She took a step back and smiled, "I wasn't sure what to get you." She took out a small package and handed it to him. She waited anxiously as he unpacked it.
"A CD of Dingoes ate my baby?!?!' He gave her a questioning look, "We never made a CD."
Willow shrugged her shoulders nervously, "I made it! You know me, computer girl. So you like?"
He pulled her close and kissed her on the forehead, "I love. But you shouldn't have gotten me anything. You already gave me the best thing in the world."
Oz had just unpacked the last present when Alice appeared in the doorway, "I'm going have fun." She smiled as Oz merely waved as acknowledgement. He had certainly changed after his mom left, but she could still read him like a book. They had become very close over the past few years.
Xander suddenly noticed a small package sitting on a table, "Hey you forgot to unpack this one."
Oz frowned and took the package. He quickly read the card before tossing it away, "That's not mine." He turned around and started to put the last breakable stuff away, where the partygoers wouldn't be able to get to them.
The others shrugged their shoulders and went back to their conversations.
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Oz sneaked in around 5 pm after dropping of Willow at home. The party had been over for several hours but she had stayed behind to help him clean and just hang. Alice didn't care how late he came home, but he didn't want to wake her. He sat down in the living room and took the package he had tossed aside earlier that evening. He read the card again, "To my son Scot." He should have known Alice wouldn't throw the gift away. He sighted and opened the package.
"What did he give you?"
He turned around and saw her standing in the doorway, "Did I wake you?"
"I was still up." She walked over to the cough and looked in the box. A brand new machinegun lay carefully wrapped. A name engraved on the side with pure silver. "Hmmm? Well your dad always did go for the classics."
"He's the only guy on the face of the planet who'd buy his son a machine gun for his 18 birthday." He paused considering this, "Well, not counting America."
"What do you want me to do with it?"
Oz shrugged, "Toss it in with the others, I got a feeling we'll be hearing more of this..."
Alice took the gun from the box and walked over to a hidden wall safe. After passing the retina scan she placed it in the empty slot of the impressive weapons arsenal. We'll have to expand it soon she contemplated.
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Cordelia was doing something extraordinary. She was talking to Xander in a relatively non-hostile tone and it wasn't even a life or death situation. Or to be exact she was gossiping with Xander, "Did you check out Oz mom?"
Xander nearly drooled at the memory, "Hell yeah! What a babe!"
She rolled her eyes, "Yeah I kinda got that impression by your tongue hanging halfway down your knee's."
Buffy and Willow walked up to the two, Buffy with a look of shock in her eyes at the unusual sight before them, "Dear god! It's the end of the world!
Willow chuckled, "Just what 'are' you two talking about?"
"Oz' mom." They replied in union.
Willow looked at her feet, "I don't like gossiping behind his back, but... wasn't she a little young?"
"I guess she was one of them teenage moms." Buffy examined her fingernails"
"8 year olds don't count as teenagers Buffy." She looked up guilty when Oz walked towards them, "Hey Oz I liked your party and I liked your mom."
Oz nodded and sweetly kissed her on the cheek, "Hmmm… thanks, but that's not my mom, that was my aunt. My mom lives in Europe. See you after school?"
"Okay..." Willow watched him walk away, before turning to Buffy upset, "See he lives with his aunt and I didn't even know! I'm telling you, I hardly know anything about him!"
"Well, if it bothers you, you should ask him about it."
"I tried, but every time I try to find out more about him, he changes the subject."
Buffy frowned, "Maybe he just doesn't like talking about him. But if you really want to know, then why don't you ask Devon? He's been friends with Oz all his life."
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Oz stopped in front of his classroom; he wasn't really in the mood for school. He quickly checked his watch and peered through the hall in teacher alert before walking away casually. He would meet Willow in the library later. It was only a small trip to look out point. He never told anybody but went there every now and then when he was skipping school. A recent habit he picked up after becoming a werewolf. It might have something to do with all the hormones drifting around here, just out of reach for his human senses, but he didn't like to think about that. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice the black car appearing at the end of the road.
Swiftly the car pulled up in front of him, effectively blocking his way. Oz growled sub-consciously and prepared to either run or fight. His werewolf senses didn't pick up a demon, but this was Sunnydale after all and you never knew what was coming. He squeezed his eyes a little when the car window rolled down.
A man dressed in a black suit, complete with sunglasses turned to him, "Scot Evil? FBI."
Oz sighted and walked over to the car, "What do you want?"
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"He Devon!" Willow ran over to the singer who was packing his schoolbag, and stopped in front of him, " Wait up."
Devon smiled at Willow, "Oh hey. Are you looking for Oz?"
"Uhm no. I wanted to ask you something."
Devon shrugged, "Ask away."
"Well you've known Oz all his life right? So I was wondering..."
Devon raised his hands, "Whoa... I just met Oz two years ago when he moved to Sunnydale."
Willow frowned confused. That was not what Oz had told her. "Really? I thought he lived here all his life."
Devon stuffed the last stuff in his bag and slammed shut the locker door "Nah, he moved here in the first year."
"Oh, okay. Thanks." Willow turned around and walked away confused, "Why would he lie to me about that?"
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The FBI agent examined the kid in front of him carefully. It was hard to believe that this slugger was the son of one of the most dangerous men on the planet. However he remembered what happened only a few seconds ago. The kid had seemed to shift from almost feral to casual in an instant. He had no doubt that he was lethal when really threatened. He scraped his throat nervously, "Your father is back on Earth. We suspect he might try to contact his family."
"Well my mom's living in Germany with her girlfriend."
The agent nodded, "Yes we already send some people to check with her. Did he try to contact you?"
Oz briefly considered denying it, he so didn't need this crap. Finally he sighed, "He send me a birthday present. I have it at home."
The agents smiled satisfied, "Show me."
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Willow walked over to Oz' house. He hadn't shown up at the library like he said he would and she wanted to talk to him. She just couldn't understand why he would lie to her. A few meters from his house she stopped abruptly and jumped behind a couple of bushes. A black car was parked in front of Oz' house. She looked at the license plate and immediately recognized the symbol for Washington DC. She bit her lip worried. Oz wasn't as skilled as her, but he was a hacker and if the feds where here it probably meant trouble. Suddenly she saw Oz coming out of the house carrying the package, she recognized from last night, followed by a guy, who's outfit was screaming FBI.
The guy looked inside the package and put it in the trunk. He nodded to Oz before getting in the car.
Willow waited until the car was out of sight, before stepping out from behind the bushes and walking over to her boyfriend, "Oz?"
Oz looked up surprised when he saw Willow walking towards him. 'Damn talk about bad timing.' There was no way she didn't see that fed. He nervously kissed her on the cheek, "Uhm... hey Will what's up."
Willow gave him a worried look. He had a look on his face she never saw on him before and hadn't even thought he was capable of. He looked guilty and a little panicked, "Who was that?"
"That was... family. You know for my birthday."
Willow nodded slowly, "I see, so your family came driving all the way here from DC to take away your presents? I'm not buying, what's going on?"
Willow squeezed her eyes when Oz laughed nervously. 'And the weirdness just keeps coming.
"Come on Will. I wouldn't lie to you. Nothings going on."
"Just like you didn't lie when you told me you lived in Sunnydale all your life."
His laugh faded fast and he bit his lip, "Uhm..."
She walked past him inside the house, "I think you have some explaining to do."
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Oz couldn't bring himself to look her in the eye. There was no escaping it now. If he didn't tell her what was going on she would simply dig until she found out by herself. He swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the nasty feeling of panic that was creeping through him. "Okay, so I lied to you... a little."
Willow snorted, "No kidding, but I think the real question here is why."
He finally looked up, "Its just… I never told this to anyone." His gaze drifted to the ground again,
" I was afraid you'd hate me… if you knew."
"Hate you?" She gave him a worried look, "Knew what, Oz?"
"Knew who my dad was… is."
"What about your dad?" She watched, as Oz squinted, obviously not happy to talk about this. She almost took pity on him, but she had to know.
"Well he's a… crazy."
"So your dads in a mental home, did you really think I couldn't handle that?"
"More an evil-triljonair-lets-take-over-the-world-kind of crazy. My mom, used to work for him, kinda like an evil personal assistant." He frowned, "I didn't really know my dad, until one day he showed up and decided that I should take over the family business, you know rule the world and everything."
Willow couldn't help but laugh at that "You as an evil mastermind?"
"Yeah I know. Might have been fun... you know had I been evil and all that."
Willow rubbed her eyes confused, "But that's ridiculous, how can one guy take over the world?"
"I know how it sounds but you have to understand something. He's like really rich and he has this whole evil empire working for him."
"Where is he now?"
Finally he sighed, "I'm not sure. My dad's back on the planet, but I don't were. I'm sure we'll hear from him soon enough though."
"Back on the planet?!?" Willow had a feeling she really didn't want to know. This was just to much.
If it was possible Oz looked even more uncomfortable now, "He tends to... Cryogenically freeze and shoot himself of into space, when things get to hot… No pun intended."
Willow slumped back in her chair, "And you didn't think I should know this because???"
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Willow was sitting on her bed with Buffy next to her. She was working on her laptop, to find out more info about Oz dad.
Buffy looked at her friend confused, "So Oz' dad is in fact an evil mastermind who wants to take over the world?"
"Yep."
"Your taking this news awfully good, you know."
"Yep."
"So you don't think this will put a strain on your relationship?"
"Yep."
"Your in shock aren't you?"
"Yep."
"Did you hear a word I just said to you?"
"Nope." Willow turned to her friend, "Here, I hacked into the FBI's files and dug up some stuff on Oz dad. Public enemy number one." She muttered under her breath.
Buffy looked at the computer screen, "Doctor Evil? What a lame nickname."
Willow shook her head, "Its not a nickname... He's got a degree in evil medicine." She turned to Buffy, "What is evil medicine?"
Buffy shuddered, "I really don't wanna know."
Willow clicked on a link, "They got a whole section on Oz... Or should I say, Scott Daniel Evil.
"Scott?
"I guess he changed his name after he moved here. Can't say I blame him."
Buffy bit her lip, "Will… do you really think you should keep seeing him?"
Willow looked up surprised, "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Well, dating a werewolf was a tad dangerous, but this being Sunnydale after all not the end of the world. Dating an evil mastermind however…"
Willow jumped up angry, "Oz is not an evil mastermind. He can't help it his dad is a dangerous psychopath! God I can't believe you're saying this. I love Oz and he loves me. And, and you! You're supposed to be his friend! This is the exactly why he never told us about his family."
"Willow… I'm just worried about you."
Willow shot her friend a dirty look, "I think you should leave now."
"Will, please don't do this." Willow simply turned away and looked out of the window. Buffy sighed, got her jacket and left.
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Buffy stalked the cemetery angrily. For some reason there where never any vamps around when she was in a bad mood. It was like they could sense she was up for some mayor butt kicking. Suddenly she stopped dead in her tracks, "What am I doing here? I should be with Willow and being a good friend." She bit her lip, Willow had been right. Oz couldn't help it, that his father was nuts. He needed their support, but instead she'd condemned him. She turned around and started to run towards Willows house.
She was nearly there when a round smoking object flew her way. As it hit the ground a cloud of green gas filled the sky. Before she even registered what had happened she fell to the floor unconscious.
Doctor Evil walked out of the shadows smiling, "Okay boy's take her to my secret lair. Number two, please send the message to my son."
Number two crossed his arms patiently. The eye patch giving him just the right amount of nastiness in a corporal suite kinda way. "What should I tell him?"
"Tell him… I have his girlfriend."
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Oz looked up from his computer when the bell rang. He had been doing the same thing as Willow (unknown to them both) trying to figure out where his dad was. "Alice?" He jumped up and skipped down the stairs, "Did you forget your key again?"
He peeked through the small looking glass in the door and went pale. He took a deep breath and opened the door, "Number two…?"
Number two gave him a nod, "Hello Scot. Your father send me here with a message."
Oz sighted and leaned against the doorpost, "Okay, lets hear it."
"Doctor Evil has your girlfriend. She will die, unless you come with me."
Oz' mouth dropped open a knot of fear forming in his stomach. 'O God. Not Willow'. He grabbed his jacket, "Lets go."
They walked past the Bronze when a dark figure approached them, speaking with a thick British accent and wearing the most heinous outfit Oz had ever seen. And he'd seen a lot in his young life. Putting aside the choice of clothes of the local undead. His dad and most of his evil minions also preferred to dress in 'quasi futuristic' (meaning bud ugly) clothing for some reason. "Well, well, if it isn't Number two and Scot Evil."
Number two took a step back and reached for his gun. But the figure jumped at them, "Not so fast! Put those hands in the air."
Oz squeezed his eyes, "Who the hell are you?"
Number two dropped his weapon, "Austin Powers!"
Austin Powers grinned, "Yes it is I!"
Oz shrugged his shoulders, "Austin Powers…?"
"Your fathers mortal enemy." Austin Powers lowered his gun, "Oh come on! You've got to remember me! You wanted to shoot me back in your dads secret volcano base!" Oz shook his head confused, "I even threatened you!" The guy looked very upset at this, "You know, the sexiest international man of mystery in the business, yeah baby yeah."
"You're the British guy right?" Oz lowered his arms, "Look I don't have time for this. My dad kidnapped my girlfriend."
Austin Powers shot him a dirty look deeply offended the kid didn't remember him and stopped the little hip dance he had been doing before grabbing number two and pushing the gun in his face. After all he was the good guy and if there was a damsel in distress he had to help. Especially if it meant getting Doctor Evil!
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Buffy opened her eyes slowly only to realize she was trapped in what appeared to be a big glass tube. Annoyed she tried to break free only to realize that not even her slayer strength could get her out of here. Her eyes widened when she saw a little bald midget in a gray suite peeking at her from behind the glass, "Whoa!"
"I see you've met mini-me."
The slayer looked up to see the grown up version of the midget smiling evilly at her, "Where the hell am I!"
"Your in my secret base underneath Sunydale college. I normally prefer volcano bases, but I had to improvise. Short notice and everything." He chuckled and bit on his pinky.
Buffy raised an eyebrow, "Oookay."
"Don't worry I'll probably won't kill you… well I might, its up to Scott really."
Suddenly the door flew open and Scott and Austin Powers dashed in, dragging along number two, "Okay doctor Evil, put those hands in the air!"
Doctor Evil raised his arms, "Austin Powers! How did you get past my evil henchmen?!?!"
Number two scraped his throat, "Uhm, doctor Evil, we didn't have time to hire any evil henchmen, working on such short notice and all."
Doctor Evil lowered his hands annoyed, "Oh for crying out loud! All I ask for are some evil henchmen to sacrifice as I deem fit! I don't ask for much do I? I even passed on the volcano base! Throw me a fricking bone here people!" Suddenly he pulled out a remote, "I just remembered, stay back or I kill the girl!"
Austin Powers tossed his gun on the ground cursing, "Think about what your doing! That's your son's girlfriend! Do you really want him to hate you for the rest of his life?"
"Oh he hates me already." He semi-smiled a proudly, "Isn't that right Scott."
Oz shrugged, "Yeah pretty much."
Doctor evil bit his pinky, "Now that that's settled. Scott I kidnapped your girlfriend because I want to make you a deal. I let her go and you take over my evil empire."
Scott squeezed his eyes, "Why me anyway? You already have mini-me!"
His father nodded regretful, "Yes he is an evil little rascal isn't he… unfortunately the evil society refuses to take him seriously… its his height you see."
Oz finally nodded, "Fine, I'll do it, just let Willow go."
Doctor Evil smiled and pushed a button that rotated the tube that held Buffy.
"Oz gave one look at the slayer his eyes growing wide, "That's not my… DAD!"
"What?"
"That's not my girlfriend!" He gave his father an annoyed look, "That's exactly why we don't get along, you show absolutely no interest in my life!!"
The evil mastermind gave him an embarrassed look, while Oz freed Buffy from her prison, "O come on " Oh, Scott don't talk like that. At least I tried."
Oz rolled his eyes and helped Buffy out of the tube, "Sorry about this."
She gave him a dazed look, "That's okay."
Austin Powers rolled over the ground grabbing his gun and pointing it at doctor Evil again, "I finally got you! Just explain one thing to me."
"What?"
"How did you get such a cool kid? I mean you being such an obvious looser!"
Doctor Evil laughed, "Hahaha, I conceived him while using your mojo!"
The international man of mystery frowned, "Then… he's my son to?"
"Yes! Tell me agent Powers, would you really shoot the father of your child?"
Austin lowered his gun confused. Doctor Evil seeing his change ran out of the lab into the waiting Crio pod. Before Austin could stop him he shot himself back into space, "Damn, he always does that!"
Oz gave him a comforting pat on the back, "Well at least his evil lair didn't blow up this time."
Austin looked around, "Yeah it is kinda groovy, just think of the possibility's." He paused" So son… How bout a hug!"
Oz gave him a spooked look, "Okay get away from me you freak!"
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Oz gave his girlfriend an unsure look as they walked across the cemetery, "Are you sure your okay with all this?"
Willow smiled sweetly, "Of course, you can't choose your family. Its not your fault your dad is crazy! I know you're not evil."
Suddenly a vampire jumped out of the bushes. Oz pushed back his girlfriend behind him, pulled out a rocket launcher and blew the vampire in little pieces while laughing manically.
The End
Feedback being good…
Continue: This story takes place after lovers walk, Oz and Willow are back together and have been dating for a couple of months now!
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Willow frowned, "I just don't know what to get him." The two girls were sitting in the coffee pump discussing possible birthday gifts for Oz birthday.
Buffy didn't get what the big deal was. No matter what Willow gave him, he would love it, because it came from her. The words 'smitten' and 'whipped' definitely came to mind with their werewolf friend. "Well, lets think this through! What does Oz like?"
"Uhm... well I know he likes music." The red head smiled naughty, "And of course he likes me."
"Well there you go, we'll just have to find him another Willow, he could start a collection!"
Willow sighed, "Its just so frustrating! We've been dating for months now and I still know hardly anything about him."
Buffy gave her a comforting look, "Oz just isn't very chatty."
"Don't I know it! It took me three months, to get him to tell me his full name and I still don't know anything about his parents... I don't know if he even has parents."
"Oz has a full name? I always kinda figured he was just Oz." Buffy squeezed her eyes and examined her friend, "So what is his name?"
"Actually Buffy, it's a law that you have a last name." She took a sip from her mocha, "Daniel Scot Ozbourn."
"Weird."
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Oz walked into his house, hoping that he was alone, since he was supposed to be in school. Not that Alice made a big deal about that kind of stuff, since he was the air to an evil enterprise and even the legal sections where worth billions. Of course the whole geniality thing also helped, "He, is anybody there?"
Alice's head appeared out of the kitchen, "Scot. Your home early! Would you like something to drink?
"No thanks… and Alice, Could you please call me Oz? Everybody else does."
She raised an eyebrow, "Very well." She looked out of the window for a moment, "Your father send you a package for your birthday."
Oz frowned a brief flash of undefined emotion running through him. On one side he hated the man. Every time he showed up his life became complicated. It had taken him a lot of effort to build up a normal life. Then again, it was his father. That had to mean something didn't it? "Dad."
Alice waited patiently for what came next.
"He's not coming right?"
His aunt gave him a comforting smile, "I don't think so." She leaned against the doorframe, relief evident on his face, "Aren't you going to unpack the present?"
"Are you sure its not a bomb or something?"
"Don't worry I checked... what do you want me to do with it?"
"Throw it in the trash for all I care." Oz turned around and skipped up the stairs."
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Xander turned to Cordelia, "So we came together, maybe it's a sign?"
Cordelia stepped back disgusted, "Yeah it means you're an idiot. Do you really think I want anything to do with you now that I've recovered from my temporary state of insanity? Its just that Oz throws great party's, else I wouldn't even be near you losers."
"When you say recovered…? Xander began, but swallowed the rest of the sentence as the door opened, "He happy birthday man!"
Oz frowned at the sight in front of him, "You came together?"
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They three had been setting up stuff for the party for the past ten minutes (even Cordelia had helped a little… okay she gave directions) when Buffy and Willow arrived. "Hey guy's!"
Willow ran over to Oz and gave him a big hug, "Congratulations birthday boy!" She took a step back and smiled, "I wasn't sure what to get you." She took out a small package and handed it to him. She waited anxiously as he unpacked it.
"A CD of Dingoes ate my baby?!?!' He gave her a questioning look, "We never made a CD."
Willow shrugged her shoulders nervously, "I made it! You know me, computer girl. So you like?"
He pulled her close and kissed her on the forehead, "I love. But you shouldn't have gotten me anything. You already gave me the best thing in the world."
Oz had just unpacked the last present when Alice appeared in the doorway, "I'm going have fun." She smiled as Oz merely waved as acknowledgement. He had certainly changed after his mom left, but she could still read him like a book. They had become very close over the past few years.
Xander suddenly noticed a small package sitting on a table, "Hey you forgot to unpack this one."
Oz frowned and took the package. He quickly read the card before tossing it away, "That's not mine." He turned around and started to put the last breakable stuff away, where the partygoers wouldn't be able to get to them.
The others shrugged their shoulders and went back to their conversations.
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Oz sneaked in around 5 pm after dropping of Willow at home. The party had been over for several hours but she had stayed behind to help him clean and just hang. Alice didn't care how late he came home, but he didn't want to wake her. He sat down in the living room and took the package he had tossed aside earlier that evening. He read the card again, "To my son Scot." He should have known Alice wouldn't throw the gift away. He sighted and opened the package.
"What did he give you?"
He turned around and saw her standing in the doorway, "Did I wake you?"
"I was still up." She walked over to the cough and looked in the box. A brand new machinegun lay carefully wrapped. A name engraved on the side with pure silver. "Hmmm? Well your dad always did go for the classics."
"He's the only guy on the face of the planet who'd buy his son a machine gun for his 18 birthday." He paused considering this, "Well, not counting America."
"What do you want me to do with it?"
Oz shrugged, "Toss it in with the others, I got a feeling we'll be hearing more of this..."
Alice took the gun from the box and walked over to a hidden wall safe. After passing the retina scan she placed it in the empty slot of the impressive weapons arsenal. We'll have to expand it soon she contemplated.
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Cordelia was doing something extraordinary. She was talking to Xander in a relatively non-hostile tone and it wasn't even a life or death situation. Or to be exact she was gossiping with Xander, "Did you check out Oz mom?"
Xander nearly drooled at the memory, "Hell yeah! What a babe!"
She rolled her eyes, "Yeah I kinda got that impression by your tongue hanging halfway down your knee's."
Buffy and Willow walked up to the two, Buffy with a look of shock in her eyes at the unusual sight before them, "Dear god! It's the end of the world!
Willow chuckled, "Just what 'are' you two talking about?"
"Oz' mom." They replied in union.
Willow looked at her feet, "I don't like gossiping behind his back, but... wasn't she a little young?"
"I guess she was one of them teenage moms." Buffy examined her fingernails"
"8 year olds don't count as teenagers Buffy." She looked up guilty when Oz walked towards them, "Hey Oz I liked your party and I liked your mom."
Oz nodded and sweetly kissed her on the cheek, "Hmmm… thanks, but that's not my mom, that was my aunt. My mom lives in Europe. See you after school?"
"Okay..." Willow watched him walk away, before turning to Buffy upset, "See he lives with his aunt and I didn't even know! I'm telling you, I hardly know anything about him!"
"Well, if it bothers you, you should ask him about it."
"I tried, but every time I try to find out more about him, he changes the subject."
Buffy frowned, "Maybe he just doesn't like talking about him. But if you really want to know, then why don't you ask Devon? He's been friends with Oz all his life."
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Oz stopped in front of his classroom; he wasn't really in the mood for school. He quickly checked his watch and peered through the hall in teacher alert before walking away casually. He would meet Willow in the library later. It was only a small trip to look out point. He never told anybody but went there every now and then when he was skipping school. A recent habit he picked up after becoming a werewolf. It might have something to do with all the hormones drifting around here, just out of reach for his human senses, but he didn't like to think about that. He was so lost in thought that he didn't notice the black car appearing at the end of the road.
Swiftly the car pulled up in front of him, effectively blocking his way. Oz growled sub-consciously and prepared to either run or fight. His werewolf senses didn't pick up a demon, but this was Sunnydale after all and you never knew what was coming. He squeezed his eyes a little when the car window rolled down.
A man dressed in a black suit, complete with sunglasses turned to him, "Scot Evil? FBI."
Oz sighted and walked over to the car, "What do you want?"
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"He Devon!" Willow ran over to the singer who was packing his schoolbag, and stopped in front of him, " Wait up."
Devon smiled at Willow, "Oh hey. Are you looking for Oz?"
"Uhm no. I wanted to ask you something."
Devon shrugged, "Ask away."
"Well you've known Oz all his life right? So I was wondering..."
Devon raised his hands, "Whoa... I just met Oz two years ago when he moved to Sunnydale."
Willow frowned confused. That was not what Oz had told her. "Really? I thought he lived here all his life."
Devon stuffed the last stuff in his bag and slammed shut the locker door "Nah, he moved here in the first year."
"Oh, okay. Thanks." Willow turned around and walked away confused, "Why would he lie to me about that?"
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The FBI agent examined the kid in front of him carefully. It was hard to believe that this slugger was the son of one of the most dangerous men on the planet. However he remembered what happened only a few seconds ago. The kid had seemed to shift from almost feral to casual in an instant. He had no doubt that he was lethal when really threatened. He scraped his throat nervously, "Your father is back on Earth. We suspect he might try to contact his family."
"Well my mom's living in Germany with her girlfriend."
The agent nodded, "Yes we already send some people to check with her. Did he try to contact you?"
Oz briefly considered denying it, he so didn't need this crap. Finally he sighed, "He send me a birthday present. I have it at home."
The agents smiled satisfied, "Show me."
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Willow walked over to Oz' house. He hadn't shown up at the library like he said he would and she wanted to talk to him. She just couldn't understand why he would lie to her. A few meters from his house she stopped abruptly and jumped behind a couple of bushes. A black car was parked in front of Oz' house. She looked at the license plate and immediately recognized the symbol for Washington DC. She bit her lip worried. Oz wasn't as skilled as her, but he was a hacker and if the feds where here it probably meant trouble. Suddenly she saw Oz coming out of the house carrying the package, she recognized from last night, followed by a guy, who's outfit was screaming FBI.
The guy looked inside the package and put it in the trunk. He nodded to Oz before getting in the car.
Willow waited until the car was out of sight, before stepping out from behind the bushes and walking over to her boyfriend, "Oz?"
Oz looked up surprised when he saw Willow walking towards him. 'Damn talk about bad timing.' There was no way she didn't see that fed. He nervously kissed her on the cheek, "Uhm... hey Will what's up."
Willow gave him a worried look. He had a look on his face she never saw on him before and hadn't even thought he was capable of. He looked guilty and a little panicked, "Who was that?"
"That was... family. You know for my birthday."
Willow nodded slowly, "I see, so your family came driving all the way here from DC to take away your presents? I'm not buying, what's going on?"
Willow squeezed her eyes when Oz laughed nervously. 'And the weirdness just keeps coming.
"Come on Will. I wouldn't lie to you. Nothings going on."
"Just like you didn't lie when you told me you lived in Sunnydale all your life."
His laugh faded fast and he bit his lip, "Uhm..."
She walked past him inside the house, "I think you have some explaining to do."
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Oz couldn't bring himself to look her in the eye. There was no escaping it now. If he didn't tell her what was going on she would simply dig until she found out by herself. He swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the nasty feeling of panic that was creeping through him. "Okay, so I lied to you... a little."
Willow snorted, "No kidding, but I think the real question here is why."
He finally looked up, "Its just… I never told this to anyone." His gaze drifted to the ground again,
" I was afraid you'd hate me… if you knew."
"Hate you?" She gave him a worried look, "Knew what, Oz?"
"Knew who my dad was… is."
"What about your dad?" She watched, as Oz squinted, obviously not happy to talk about this. She almost took pity on him, but she had to know.
"Well he's a… crazy."
"So your dads in a mental home, did you really think I couldn't handle that?"
"More an evil-triljonair-lets-take-over-the-world-kind of crazy. My mom, used to work for him, kinda like an evil personal assistant." He frowned, "I didn't really know my dad, until one day he showed up and decided that I should take over the family business, you know rule the world and everything."
Willow couldn't help but laugh at that "You as an evil mastermind?"
"Yeah I know. Might have been fun... you know had I been evil and all that."
Willow rubbed her eyes confused, "But that's ridiculous, how can one guy take over the world?"
"I know how it sounds but you have to understand something. He's like really rich and he has this whole evil empire working for him."
"Where is he now?"
Finally he sighed, "I'm not sure. My dad's back on the planet, but I don't were. I'm sure we'll hear from him soon enough though."
"Back on the planet?!?" Willow had a feeling she really didn't want to know. This was just to much.
If it was possible Oz looked even more uncomfortable now, "He tends to... Cryogenically freeze and shoot himself of into space, when things get to hot… No pun intended."
Willow slumped back in her chair, "And you didn't think I should know this because???"
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Willow was sitting on her bed with Buffy next to her. She was working on her laptop, to find out more info about Oz dad.
Buffy looked at her friend confused, "So Oz' dad is in fact an evil mastermind who wants to take over the world?"
"Yep."
"Your taking this news awfully good, you know."
"Yep."
"So you don't think this will put a strain on your relationship?"
"Yep."
"Your in shock aren't you?"
"Yep."
"Did you hear a word I just said to you?"
"Nope." Willow turned to her friend, "Here, I hacked into the FBI's files and dug up some stuff on Oz dad. Public enemy number one." She muttered under her breath.
Buffy looked at the computer screen, "Doctor Evil? What a lame nickname."
Willow shook her head, "Its not a nickname... He's got a degree in evil medicine." She turned to Buffy, "What is evil medicine?"
Buffy shuddered, "I really don't wanna know."
Willow clicked on a link, "They got a whole section on Oz... Or should I say, Scott Daniel Evil.
"Scott?
"I guess he changed his name after he moved here. Can't say I blame him."
Buffy bit her lip, "Will… do you really think you should keep seeing him?"
Willow looked up surprised, "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Well, dating a werewolf was a tad dangerous, but this being Sunnydale after all not the end of the world. Dating an evil mastermind however…"
Willow jumped up angry, "Oz is not an evil mastermind. He can't help it his dad is a dangerous psychopath! God I can't believe you're saying this. I love Oz and he loves me. And, and you! You're supposed to be his friend! This is the exactly why he never told us about his family."
"Willow… I'm just worried about you."
Willow shot her friend a dirty look, "I think you should leave now."
"Will, please don't do this." Willow simply turned away and looked out of the window. Buffy sighed, got her jacket and left.
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Buffy stalked the cemetery angrily. For some reason there where never any vamps around when she was in a bad mood. It was like they could sense she was up for some mayor butt kicking. Suddenly she stopped dead in her tracks, "What am I doing here? I should be with Willow and being a good friend." She bit her lip, Willow had been right. Oz couldn't help it, that his father was nuts. He needed their support, but instead she'd condemned him. She turned around and started to run towards Willows house.
She was nearly there when a round smoking object flew her way. As it hit the ground a cloud of green gas filled the sky. Before she even registered what had happened she fell to the floor unconscious.
Doctor Evil walked out of the shadows smiling, "Okay boy's take her to my secret lair. Number two, please send the message to my son."
Number two crossed his arms patiently. The eye patch giving him just the right amount of nastiness in a corporal suite kinda way. "What should I tell him?"
"Tell him… I have his girlfriend."
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Oz looked up from his computer when the bell rang. He had been doing the same thing as Willow (unknown to them both) trying to figure out where his dad was. "Alice?" He jumped up and skipped down the stairs, "Did you forget your key again?"
He peeked through the small looking glass in the door and went pale. He took a deep breath and opened the door, "Number two…?"
Number two gave him a nod, "Hello Scot. Your father send me here with a message."
Oz sighted and leaned against the doorpost, "Okay, lets hear it."
"Doctor Evil has your girlfriend. She will die, unless you come with me."
Oz' mouth dropped open a knot of fear forming in his stomach. 'O God. Not Willow'. He grabbed his jacket, "Lets go."
They walked past the Bronze when a dark figure approached them, speaking with a thick British accent and wearing the most heinous outfit Oz had ever seen. And he'd seen a lot in his young life. Putting aside the choice of clothes of the local undead. His dad and most of his evil minions also preferred to dress in 'quasi futuristic' (meaning bud ugly) clothing for some reason. "Well, well, if it isn't Number two and Scot Evil."
Number two took a step back and reached for his gun. But the figure jumped at them, "Not so fast! Put those hands in the air."
Oz squeezed his eyes, "Who the hell are you?"
Number two dropped his weapon, "Austin Powers!"
Austin Powers grinned, "Yes it is I!"
Oz shrugged his shoulders, "Austin Powers…?"
"Your fathers mortal enemy." Austin Powers lowered his gun, "Oh come on! You've got to remember me! You wanted to shoot me back in your dads secret volcano base!" Oz shook his head confused, "I even threatened you!" The guy looked very upset at this, "You know, the sexiest international man of mystery in the business, yeah baby yeah."
"You're the British guy right?" Oz lowered his arms, "Look I don't have time for this. My dad kidnapped my girlfriend."
Austin Powers shot him a dirty look deeply offended the kid didn't remember him and stopped the little hip dance he had been doing before grabbing number two and pushing the gun in his face. After all he was the good guy and if there was a damsel in distress he had to help. Especially if it meant getting Doctor Evil!
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Buffy opened her eyes slowly only to realize she was trapped in what appeared to be a big glass tube. Annoyed she tried to break free only to realize that not even her slayer strength could get her out of here. Her eyes widened when she saw a little bald midget in a gray suite peeking at her from behind the glass, "Whoa!"
"I see you've met mini-me."
The slayer looked up to see the grown up version of the midget smiling evilly at her, "Where the hell am I!"
"Your in my secret base underneath Sunydale college. I normally prefer volcano bases, but I had to improvise. Short notice and everything." He chuckled and bit on his pinky.
Buffy raised an eyebrow, "Oookay."
"Don't worry I'll probably won't kill you… well I might, its up to Scott really."
Suddenly the door flew open and Scott and Austin Powers dashed in, dragging along number two, "Okay doctor Evil, put those hands in the air!"
Doctor Evil raised his arms, "Austin Powers! How did you get past my evil henchmen?!?!"
Number two scraped his throat, "Uhm, doctor Evil, we didn't have time to hire any evil henchmen, working on such short notice and all."
Doctor Evil lowered his hands annoyed, "Oh for crying out loud! All I ask for are some evil henchmen to sacrifice as I deem fit! I don't ask for much do I? I even passed on the volcano base! Throw me a fricking bone here people!" Suddenly he pulled out a remote, "I just remembered, stay back or I kill the girl!"
Austin Powers tossed his gun on the ground cursing, "Think about what your doing! That's your son's girlfriend! Do you really want him to hate you for the rest of his life?"
"Oh he hates me already." He semi-smiled a proudly, "Isn't that right Scott."
Oz shrugged, "Yeah pretty much."
Doctor evil bit his pinky, "Now that that's settled. Scott I kidnapped your girlfriend because I want to make you a deal. I let her go and you take over my evil empire."
Scott squeezed his eyes, "Why me anyway? You already have mini-me!"
His father nodded regretful, "Yes he is an evil little rascal isn't he… unfortunately the evil society refuses to take him seriously… its his height you see."
Oz finally nodded, "Fine, I'll do it, just let Willow go."
Doctor Evil smiled and pushed a button that rotated the tube that held Buffy.
"Oz gave one look at the slayer his eyes growing wide, "That's not my… DAD!"
"What?"
"That's not my girlfriend!" He gave his father an annoyed look, "That's exactly why we don't get along, you show absolutely no interest in my life!!"
The evil mastermind gave him an embarrassed look, while Oz freed Buffy from her prison, "O come on " Oh, Scott don't talk like that. At least I tried."
Oz rolled his eyes and helped Buffy out of the tube, "Sorry about this."
She gave him a dazed look, "That's okay."
Austin Powers rolled over the ground grabbing his gun and pointing it at doctor Evil again, "I finally got you! Just explain one thing to me."
"What?"
"How did you get such a cool kid? I mean you being such an obvious looser!"
Doctor Evil laughed, "Hahaha, I conceived him while using your mojo!"
The international man of mystery frowned, "Then… he's my son to?"
"Yes! Tell me agent Powers, would you really shoot the father of your child?"
Austin lowered his gun confused. Doctor Evil seeing his change ran out of the lab into the waiting Crio pod. Before Austin could stop him he shot himself back into space, "Damn, he always does that!"
Oz gave him a comforting pat on the back, "Well at least his evil lair didn't blow up this time."
Austin looked around, "Yeah it is kinda groovy, just think of the possibility's." He paused" So son… How bout a hug!"
Oz gave him a spooked look, "Okay get away from me you freak!"
---------------------------
Oz gave his girlfriend an unsure look as they walked across the cemetery, "Are you sure your okay with all this?"
Willow smiled sweetly, "Of course, you can't choose your family. Its not your fault your dad is crazy! I know you're not evil."
Suddenly a vampire jumped out of the bushes. Oz pushed back his girlfriend behind him, pulled out a rocket launcher and blew the vampire in little pieces while laughing manically.
The End
Feedback being good…
