Prologue:
Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas,
Ring the Hogwarts bell,
Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas,
Cast a Hogwarts spell.
Have a wondrous wizard Christmas,
Have a Merry Christmas day,
Hover 'round the sparkling fire,
Have a Merry Christmas day.
Find a broomstick in your stocking,
See the magic on display,
Join the owls joyous flocking on this merry Christmas day.
Ding dong,
Ding dong,
Ring the Hogwarts bell.
Ding dong,
Ding dong,
Cast a Christmas spell.
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Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry was ablaze with Christmas spirit. With exams aside and a good week away from school lightening everyone's mood, everything was in perfect harmony. The Great Hall was decorated beyond belief with humungous fir trees glittering with fairy lights and faux snow crystals. The high ceiling portrayed the sky outside perfectly, a pearly white sky lit with pink, the sun setting, graced with the occasional snowflake, each to its own unique. The babble from the four house tables, from one table to the next, drowned out the ferocious winds outside. Soon after the Headmaster's routine Christmas departure speech, the babble was teamed with the chinking of silverware. The talking was louder than before; each house was acting on its own accord. Ravenclaw were quietly conversing, Hufflepuff farewelling each other cheerfully, Slytherin talking among themselves, subdued towards the other houses, and Gryffindor, loudest in comparison had a party in the works, and of course like every other party thrown, the Marauders were planning it.
"This is our Sixth Year send off, boys! Evans aside, I'm going to have a wild one tonight. Are you up for it, Paddy?" Of course, James would need his best friend's affirmation before he went and got trashed; he'd need someone to share the burden of a terrible hangover with the next day, and with Peter likely heading to bed earlier than himself and predicting Remus's absolute refusal, Sirius was James's only hope. "Well, Paddy, how about it?"
Sirius lifted his head off his arms to look at James from under his messy hair that was always in his eyes. "What?" he asked.
"Are those ears glued on? I said, do you plan on having a few tonight? Thing is, I don't want to have to entertain alone and since you've been a bit quiet today, I thought I'd ask before I got too far done. Are you up for it, or are you feeling a bit peaky?" He threw Sirius a challenging look, attempting to shake him from his distraction.
"Of course, mate. I'm usually up for it, aren't I?"
"Yeah course," James said, smiling gratefully. He launched into the details for an avid looking Peter and a quieter Remus, who was picking at his dinner and casting glances every now and then at Sirius who, as earlier, was pretending to listen with a withdrawn, somehow miserable, expression.
"You've got enough drinks for Gryffindor, haven't you? Peter asked, as James informed him about the night.
"Of course I did, you prat, who else would have bought any? It's all in my trunk. Come on everyone, everyone's clearing out. Let's go." The four rose with many other and led the excited throng back to the Common Room where the party was to take place.
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"Mate, James is off the hook! Bloody hell, he's making an absolute git of himself!" Remus looked up from his book and over the armchair's back to where James was dancing like an idiot with a school skirt on. Remus laughed aloud, though stifling when his gaze fell on Sirius who was out of the scene, staring off with a remote expression on his face.
"Get up Moony," Peter said, tapping his shoulder and pulling him out of the armchair. "Have a drink, let your hair down for once. "Peter yanked the book Remus had been earlier immersed in out of his hands and pushed him into the dancing crowd, where he fell at James's feet. He felt himself being pulled up by the shirt and a bellowing in his ear. "Moony, you're dancing! Here, I have you a dance partner," James yelled over the music, pulling him towards a girl whose name escaped Remus. He looked down at her with a small smile, her head just brushing his shoulder. He looked over her head to the place where Sirius had stood to find him gone.
He danced for a few minutes half-heartedly, scoping the room for Sirius; he was, of course, nowhere to be seen. He suffered a few minutes more of dancing before he excused himself, pushing through the dancers. He picked his discarded book up off the floor and headed for the boys' dormitory, a thought striking him that Sirius just might be upstairs.
And there was Sirius, in all his beauty, sprawled on the window seat, his drink in his hand, the moonlight casting shadows across his vacant face.
Remus entered the room without turning any lights on, closing the door behind with the softest of clicks.
He lingered by his bed, packing away his book, fidgeting with his suitcase that was already packed for the trip home on the Hogwarts Express. Giving up on this, he inclined his head towards Sirius.
"Padfoot," he tried to sound surprised. "Why aren't you downstairs with Prongs? You aren't in much of a celebrating mood, are you?" He sounded concerned to his own ears.
Sirius looked at Remus then, pausing to drink deeply before replying. "James and I aren't joined at the hip, Remmy. We can do things separately," he said soberly, just the bit tipsy, with a weak smile that disappeared almost as soon as it had appeared.
Remus cringed when he called him Remmy; the boys had stopped calling him that in Third Year, all except for Sirius who called him it when they were alone. Lucius Malfoy had said it sounded 'gay'.
"Yeah, I know that," Remus said, getting up and walking to the middle of the room. He stood awkward, looking for something to say. "So, what do you want for Christmas? I haven't got it yet." He knotted his fingers, unsure of what else to say other than that. Anything else that crossed his mind, like, "are you okay" might earn him a smack in the mouth.
"Don't worry about getting me anything," he said dully, averting his gaze from Remus. "My mum won't let me have it anyway."
Remus needn't ask questions; it was quite clear that the Blacks kept Sirius looking nice so as to grace the family name, but he was unfairly mistreated in all other aspects.
"What is your family up to this Christmas?" he asked.
"They will be at family's house." Remus didn't like how Sirius singled himself out of family occasions. "I will most probably be locked in the basement. Or if I'm lucky, I'll have to slave after Bellatrix and Narcissa."
Remus swallowed, his eyes wide with horror. "Oh, Sirius, I'm sorry -," he began before he was interrupted.
"Please don't tell me you're sorry. You don't need to pretend. I know nobody loves me."
Remus advanced on Sirius, making the walk in three sides, and sat on the window seat next to him. "Sirius, look at me," he said, taking Sirius's shoulders and shaking them.
Sirius, who had been looking at his hands, shook his hair out of his eyes and looked at Remus, his expression hard. "What?"
"Don't ever say that again, Sirius, ever. Don't you think we love you? We love you. I – I love you. You're my best friend."
Sirius's face softened. "You really mean it?" he doubted, his eyes swimming with tears.
"Yes, how many times do I have to tell you? I love you," Remus said. "I love you," he repeated, stronger.
"I love you too," Sirius said weakly, his voice breaking.
"I'd hope so, git. Now, come here," Remus said, putting an arm around his friend. Sirius threw both his arms around Remus, burying his head in his shoulder, sniffing.
Sirius smelt divine; strongly like leather, cologne, mint and a hint of liquor. His breath was coming fast on Remus's shoulder, hot and damp. Remus cupped Sirius's chin, bringing his face up to his level. "I'll stay at Hogwarts this Christmas," he promised, looking into Sirius's glazed eyes. Sirius began to object, but Remus stopped him short. "My parents won't mind. I'll send them an owl, we don't really celebrate Christmas.
"You'd do that? For me?"
"How many times are you going to make me say it? You are one of my best friends - my best friend, even. Don't make me say I love you again."
"You just did," Sirius said, regaining his cheek, laughing. Remus laughed with him.
"Come on," he said, letting Sirius go. They made their way to the door and down the staircase where Sirius stopped Remus. "You know, you aren't James, but you really are one of the best friends anyone could ask for." He smiled at Remus and lifting his hand, brushed his cheek. "Tell me when you want me to make it up to you." He dropped his fingers and joined the party, Remus rooted to the spot.
He touched the tops of his fingertips to his own cheek where Sirius had brushed.
"You just did," he whispered, repeating Sirius's words.
