Author: Pirate Turner
Rating: R due to sexual content
Summary: She opened the closet to a scene she never would have expected to find in a million centuries: Thing lending a hand.
Warnings: Het; Slash referenced
Disclaimer: Gomez and Morticia Addams, Lurch, Thing, and The Addams Family are & TM their respective owners, not the author, and are used without permission. Everything else is & TM the author. The author makes absolutely no profit off of this work of fan fiction, and no copyright infringement is intended.
She opened the closet to a scene she never would have expected to find in a million centuries. She shut it quickly and plastered herself, spread-eagled, against the door. Her dark eyes were huge and round with shock, and her skin the palest it had ever been when her husband stepped into the room. He paused in puffing on his cigar to ask, "Have you seen Lurch? The spiders are hungry."
Morticia fervently shook her head as she tried frantically to rid her mind of the image she'd just seen. Only the sound of her wildly beating heart, which normally didn't beat at all, drowned out the moans of ecstasy that still echoed in her ears.
"Hmm." Gomez took another long puff on his cigar, then queried, "How about Thing? The mail's late, and I'm expecting my Toys and Explosives For The Modern Vampire's Dungeon catalog." His mustache twitched suggestively, and he winked at her. "I was hoping we'd find something terribly old and exciting to try out this Halloween night."
Her mind still whirling, Morticia answered him in carefully chosen French, "Lurch et Thing soyez plutt . . . proccup en ce moment, et probablement pendant longtemps, mon chri."
As expected, Gomez flung his cigar over his shoulder and ran straight to her side. "Ah, Tish, you spoke French!" He rapidly started kissing a line up her arm.
Morticia patted his face lovingly. Her own breathing was already far more labored than normal, and she still couldn't get the image of her discovery out of her mind. Gomez's kisses shot electric bolts through her wanting body as surely as their electric chair would have, but oh, how she wanted more! How she needed more!
Her hands left Gomez's face to run over his body. She tried to caress every part of him at once in her frantic eagerness, and he jumped against her when she squeezed his buns through his ebony trousers. His mustache wriggled so that it looked ready to pop off of his face at the slightest notice. She wanted to touch him, feel him, taste every inch of him!
Her black lips parted in a hushed whisper, "Let's go to our bedroom, mon amour." She started speaking every French word of amour she knew, and Gomez swept her into his arms. As he carried her to their bedroom, he began kissing her all over, but still it wasn't enough.
When at last she was able to tear the clothes from his body, push him down on their bed of nails, and take his fully aroused manhood in her hands, she was finally able to rid her mind of another man's sword. She grinned in triumph as she took her husband's head in her mouth and squeezed his staff in a way that made him scream for more.
Lurch might be a Giant, but even he had nothing on her man! Let Thing have him, and may they be forever unhappy together! Her Gomez was just the right amount of man for her, and he always would be!
The End
