"What gives him the right to rule?" Cinderella demanded, stomping her little foot prettily. "What does he have that I don't?"
"A cock, dear" her fairy godmother answered absently. "Now hold still while I fit this..."
"Yeah, well, screw him! Him and his cock!"
"Many women would like to, my dear." her godmother replied, fluttering her wings lightly, so that faint traceries of light outlined her feminine curves. "Just you give me a tick, and we'll see if we can't have him just begging to try on your, ahem, slipper, by the end of the evening."
"No. " Conderella said flatly, glaring up at her godmother. "I won't. I'm not going, and that's final!"
Her godmother sighed fastening a plastic smile to her face. She could see this was going to be anothe difficult case. "Well then dear, what do you want, if not the hand of the pricne and true love forever?"
"I want..." Cinderella began, her gaze drifting as she peered deep into spaces only she could see. "I want..." Cinderella frowned. "Hold on a minute, I only get one wish, right? So let's do this properly. Whatever gives HIM the right to rule, I wish you to give me one – twice as big!"
The fairy gaped at her, images of the anatomical possibilities running through her mind, even as she felt the thrum of magic as it reponded to a properly formulated wish. Glowing furiously (ladies never sweat, my dear, we merely glow), she waved her wand on autopilot, allowing the magic to find it's own shape, unable to tear her eyes away.
There was a moment of silence, broken by the distant roar of a trumpet. Again, the trumpet cried, closer, and again. Within moments the earth began to stir, and for miles around, troops pushed themselves to the surface – goblins and golems, dwarves and beasts, pushed through the earth, each wearing a rough uniform in cinderella's favorite colors – blue and gold.
"Oh!" her godmother gasped. "What gives him his right to rule, of course! It's his ARMY!"
AN: Just a little vignette that struck me as amusing. I have no plans to continue this, but I might if a lot of people leave a review asking for it. Imagine Girl Genius, but without the mad science or monster. Well, maybe a little mad science...
