Author's Note: This is my first publishing :) it's based off of a story line that is basically my version of a GG5 that keeps me entertained until March when Out of Sight, Out of Time comes out. So, enjoy and let me know what you think.

Disclaimer: I only wish I was Ally Carter.

The hallways were dark.
Extremely dark.
It almost seemed as if the entire world had shut me out.
Or vise versa.
Not on purpose, of course.
The lack of the elegant moon light that would peek through the corridor windows of the East Wing on any normal night just added to the feeling of complete and utter…
loneliness.

Not that I was alone much anymore.
I was back. I was home. With my sisters.
And, after a long long time being far far away from anything close to home, it felt good.

But, returning to finish, or rather start, Senior Year at Gallagher wasn't the quick fix I thought it would be. Crossing the line between life and death more than once in a lifetime could shake up anyone.
And, I had done it too many times to count in the past 10 months I was gone from these halls.

3 months I was gone, on my own
1 with the Circle.
6 with a rescue team, a rescue team including Gallagher's East Wing guest.
And, the majority of those 6 in a coma.

So, yeah. I guess I could say that I had seen a lot more than normal 18 year old.
But, it's only when something like all of that happens to you that you realize the truth.
Gallagher Girl or not, you're still only 18.
And no matter how much any Gallagher Girl would want to ignore the fact that she's unstable, broken, wounded…
It's the truth.
And, considering the fact that my social level had plummeted in the past few weeks of getting back on my feet, I had to say I had some undeniably convincing evidence that I was, in fact, not fully healed.

And, really. There is only one person that could even begin to sooth the scars.
Either that or I had just lost all hope.
And, he was my last chance.

I knocked lightly on the door that was surrounded with a halo of faint light.
And, with that I looked around nervously.

It was 3:27 am.
My footsteps had been silent.
There was no way anybody knew I was down here.
And, yet something about this situation was unsettling.
I was frightened.
And, that's when I noticed that tears were rolling down my cheeks.

Bright light from the room burst into my sore eyes at the opening of the door. Avoiding the light, my eyes focused on the floor while I sucked up my pride and braced myself for what came next.

"Well, well, well," a familiar snide sarcastic voice spoke up and I could just imagine the boy in front of me leaning on his door frame, "I always knew this day would come, but I never thought it would be this soon, Gallagher Girl."

I bit my lip trying my best not to deck Zachary Goode in the face. But, I just stood. Frozen. Eyes on the floor waiting for them to adjust to the change of light.

"I've gotta say, Gallagher Girl, It's a little late, and I have never taken you for the sleazy type
. But, you know. If you're down for it…"

His smirk emerged from his voice accompanied by not only extreme sexual innuendo but also foamy luster added from a toothbrush he had set in his mouth and began to scrub his pearly whites.

It wasn't until the moment that I lifted my eyes to meet his green ones that his smirk faded.

I felt pathetic looking into those eyes with my red, puffy, worn out ones.
I felt stupid having to dry my cheeks with my wrists and sniffle up the unattractive excess snot in my nose.
I felt idiotic not brushing my hair or checking myself in the mirror before coming down here.
But, I guess I didn't have time.
I needed him.
Now.

Zach surveyed me as if I was the one wearing only boxers and not him. His jaw dropped a little as he examined my face tenderly.

Pulling the toothbrush out of his mouth, he nudged his head, motioning me to enter his room.
Doing as I was told, I stood just far enough away so he could close the door and watched him walk to his bathroom, finish his brushing and walk back to me wiping the left over toothpaste residue with a small washcloth.

With that he focused in on my eyes then stepped to me with the washcloth, wiping the streaks of water that soaked my cheeks away tenderly and completely out of character.
And, before I could think and let him do the gentlemanly act..
I flinched.

"What?" He asked taken aback that I had dodged his healing hand.
Glancing at the washcloth in his hand, I swallowed the frog in my throat and said stupidly,
"It has toothpaste on it."
Zach half-laughed.
My stomach flipped.

He threw the washcloth onto one of the two empty beds in his three-bed suite and then offered his thumb.
"It's clean. I promise" Zach assured me almost remotely sweetly as he held up his thumb and started to dab under my eyes. After he finished, he motioned to his bed inviting me to sit down.
Taking a seat in the desk chair across from me, he gave it a spin and stretched his muscular arms behind his head.

"So, how can I help you, Gallagher Girl?" Zach inquired looking up at me quizzically.
"What makes you think I need your help?" I retorted, again, stupidly.
I suddenly felt that coming to Zach for my problems wasn't the best decision…

He stopped his spinning and raised one of his eyebrows.

"You traveled all the way down to the East Wing to see the lone guy that lives in this sea of estrogen at 3:30 in the morning. Considering no one else lives in this wing, you definitely didn't get the wrong room. And, considering the tears that were in your eyes before I so courteously wiped them away, I conclude that you need help." He paused leaning on his knees, "from me."

"Why do you care if I'm crying?" I asked referring to his strange tear-wiping-behavior, ignoring his evidence of my need for help and dodging the subject suddenly feeling very cowardly.

Zach locked eyes with me and shrugged.
Just when I thought he was going to smile .
Just when I thought he was going to tell me he couldn't bear to see me cry.
He smirked. And, I realized that I had forgotten who I was talking to…

"Let's just say. Tears aren't my thing.
When I see them. I get rid of them. And, yours are no different."

I let out a frustrated groan as I grabbed his down comforter and wrapped it tightly around me.
It smelt like him. I loved that smell.
But, that didn't make him any less of a jerk.

"Oh. My bad for crying. When was the last time you actually cried, Zach? Have you ever cried?" I struggled to somehow fight for myself and justify my reasoning for making the trip down here.

"Yup."

My eyes snapped up to meet his now sort of timid green ones, as if timid was even possible for Zach.
"When?"
"Uh…mainly when you were in your coma ..."

Silence fell. He cleared his throat while he crossed his arms, his fingers landing on the large scar on his side. The result of a bullet. The result of a dark past that wasn't as long ago as we thought.

And, I noticed just how much heavy the air was between us.
Everything may have been "over"
But jokes and teasing had a limit. We had been through too much.
And, being home didn't quite fix it like we thought it would.

"Why…?" I asked, smiling sweetly hoping I could lighten the moment.
" So I wouldn't be able to hold it against you?"

"Sure, Gallagher Girl." He struggled to smile back, the expression on his face squelching my longing to know what made the stoic Zachary Goode cry.

"Cammie." I was started out of my thoughts by the use of my name.

When I lifted my head, I saw Zach had rolled his chair close to his bed to get a better look at my face, to read every word held in my skin. Letting out a heavy sigh, I raised my eyebrows attentively holding onto my poker face tightly.

I was safe. I told myself I didn't have to cry anymore. And, I shouldn't or I would just look more ridiculous. And, I already certain that I wasn't at all near the Macey McHenry Appearance Approval Standard designed to make sure a girl always looked her best around gorgeous boys.
And I was pretty sure Zachary Goode feel under the "gorgeous category".

"What's the matter?"

I shook my head and shrugged. An obvious gesture that any normal person would have taken as a clear sign that something was indeed the matter, then would continue encourage soothingly until an answer was comfortably given.
But, this was Zach.
Zach didn't do normal.
And, Zach definitely did not "encourage soothingly".
No matter how much it was needed.
Therefore, the conversation continued as follows:

"So…" He snidely smiled, "You're telling me you are down here to do the nasty with me. "
Burning red, I flinched in disgust, hiding my admiration for his flawless body.
"Ew. No."

"You don't have to deny it, Gallagher Girl. I am pretty irresistible…"
"Gross." I shot out, "Zach, stop."
"And, I don't blame you, Galla-."
"Zach!"
And, with the sound of my strained voice, he stopped.
Turning toward me, Zach wore the same expression he did only minutes ago in the door way and I figured that I must be looking distressed once more. I must have been crying or something.

Because, Zach's face dropped as if it was a thousand pounds too heavy.

"Do you want to hear the truth, or do you want to continue with your stupid joke?" I grumbled, my hands tightening into fists. Irrational? Yes. But, I was getting desperate. I couldn't avoid it any longer.

Zach returned to his chair and looked at me questioningly, as if he was eager to see if I would hold true to my words.

"I've been having nightmares."

My voice was unrecognizably tear stricken and I suddenly couldn't be a spy any longer who could hide their feelings as easily as they could flip a switch.
I had to let the 18 year old girl out.

"Awful nightmares," I breathed rubbing my head and not daring to close my eyes or speak of them too long just in case they would appear again.

Visions of blood, sounds of gun shots, screams of pure pain and agony. Nothing anyone could ever really describe for anyone else. All anyone knew was that I woke up in tears, woke up screaming bloody murder, gasping for air, grasping for someone who understood, someone who had the ability to keep me safe. It was like living the past 10 months all over again. Every night.
And, as I looked up at the one person who I thought was capable of any of that.
I silently prayed this would work as I whispered perhaps the scariest fact of all.

"I can't get rid of them."

Zach didn't say anything. He just watched me play with my sweat shirt. And listened.

"And, I can't talk to anyone. I can't get over any of this. I can't feel safe. I can't…" I gritted my teeth being faced with the truth again, "And, I hatethat I can't."

"And you came here.." Zach tried to complete my thoughts softly.

"Because I'm safe here." I blurted.

I don't know what it was.
Maybe it was because he just carried that vibe. Maybe it was because he was 6 foot and extremely ripped. Maybe it was because Zach had been with me for all but three of those 10 months.
Maybe it was because he had seen the things I'd seen, heard the things I heard.

Or maybe it was because I loved him. And, that's how you felt with someone you love.
Safe.

Whatever it was. I knew it was the truth.

"And, I figured Bex, Liz, and Mace might appreciate a night without someone waking up screaming every 30 minutes."
Shrugging, I smiled into Zach's dark green eyes and sniffled.
After a full century long 20 seconds of silence, I got nervous and stammered, realizing I probably had just shattered all of my dignity and I had only moments to put it back together.

"I-I didn't come here for sympathy. I just came cause-"

But, Zach interrupted me; his lips closing on mine.
He gave me a soft kiss. A kiss that kind of seemed sorrowful, and sad.
And, totally not the cocky, over confident Zachary Goode I know…
But, I had felt safer in that short moment than I had in 10 months.

He parted sweetly, but avoided my eyes. He had said all he needed to say.

Rising from his chair, he kicked it back in places then flicked off the light in his bathroom and sighed heavily.

"Well, I've got two extra beds. Pick one and get some sleep." He said grabbing one of his pillows and tossing it to Jonas's former bed at the window side of the room.
I looked up at him quizzically and when he finally met my eyes, he surveyed me once more.

For a second I thought he would kiss me again.
For a second I thought he would tell me how he felt.
For a second I thought he would continue his streak of non-Zach-like acts.

But he just murmured.
"You can keep the down comforter."
Then climbed into his bed and hit the switch on the wall next to him, taking all the light from the room in an instant.
And, with that I rose and made my way to Jonas's bed, cascaded by slight moonlight peeking through the blinds. But, as I laid down something in me didn't feel right.

Normally, I wouldn't ever do anything like what I did next.
Normally, I wouldn't ever take a risk with Zach.
Because a risk at looking ridiculous in front of him would translate into months of teasing and taunting.
And I had already taken to many risks that night.

So, to this day, I swear up and down that it was some other frightened teenage girl and not Cammie Morgan that subconsciously rose up from that bed and stumbled towards another in the slim moonlight.
It didn't take much effort I don't think because the next thing I knew I wasn't in Jonas's bed anymore, but Zach's.
Laying the pillow down next to his, I squeezed under the covers and settled into the piece of mattress next to the boy who had been with me. Through everything.

And, I guess that boy really didn't protest like I thought he would because as soon as I slipped into his territory, his arms wrapped around my waist and pulled my head up to rest on his chest, and something about it all felt familiar. As if I had rested in his arms like this before.
And, at this point anything familiarwas what something I held onto.

"Decided you really did come down here for me and not just a new bed?"
I could hear his smirk. I rolled my eyes.
"Both."
"Ah. See, I don't think so cause-"
"Zach." I cut him off and lifted my head to focus on the faint features on his face outlined in the moonlight and his dark green eyes that seemed to gleam a little.
"Yes, Gallagher Girl?" he said as I realized I was staring.
"Go to sleep." I demanded softly, his face inches from mine. Resisting the urge to kiss him, I laid my head back down, snuggling gently into his chest.

"Oh, come on. The last think you wanna do right now is sleep. Admit it. "

"Goodnight, Zach" I mumbled.

"Yeah, it really could be a good nightif you just -"

"Goodnight, Zach."

"Goodnight, Gallagher Girl" a small whisper emerged as a light kiss was placed on my head and a nose was tucked into my hairline, "Sweet dreams"