Thanks Aisha! I just had the sudden inspiration to do this one shot.
Read Breaking Dawn: My Life as a Cullen by Emmettishillarious13 it is so awesome and by Aisha, the most awesome writer in fan fiction existence
This is set at the end of Eclipse when Jacob is running away, the song is Kryptonite by Three Doors Down
Jacobs P.O.V.
Aurgh! Where did I go wrong? What did I do wrong? I was the best friend she could ever hope for, I was more than that! We were made for each other, she even admitted she loved me and it still wasn't enough. She should be my soul mate. It was all that stupid blood sucker's fault. I did everything she could want me to and it still wasn't enough. She was going to be married to a leech before become one herself! It was just so much more than I could take; the one I loved more than anything in the world being turned all hard and cold. I had been running for 3 weeks now and the same thoughts had been constantly running through my wolfish mind, the pain may be dulled but the thoughts certainly weren't.
I was passing the first part of Civilisation in weeks, a road somewhere, I wasn't sure where I was but it was someplace cold, I think it was somewhere in Canada or maybe it was Alaska, anyway it didn't matter at the moment, I was just a long way a way from home, Bella and my brothers. A truck was somewhere in the distance; I could hear the music turned up loud;
I
took a walk around the world to
Ease my troubled mind
My mind felt like it was going to explode, I felt happier in my wolf form but I still had a LOT to think about. I was trying to run away from everything but I still couldn't escape myself, my feelings and my thoughts.
I
left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
I wonder what happens to my body when I phase? Maybe I'll ask Sam when I get back. Wait when I get back? I don't even know if I will ever return. Would I ever be able to face Bella again? Would I ever be able to face the pack – my brothers – my father, my family ever again now?
I
watched the world float to the dark
Side of the moon
I feel
there is nothing I can do, yeah
Is there anything I could do to stop Bella, my world from going over to the blood suckers? Her body turned to ice and rock?
I
watched the world float to the
Dark side of the moon
After
all I knew it had to be something
To do with you
This has everything to do with Bella, if it wasn't for Bella I would still be with my brothers and Leah – my sister, I guess. I wouldn't need to run.
I
really don't mind what happens now and then
As long as you'll be
my friend at the end
But
is that true? Do I really not care? Do I just need to be her friend
or will I not be able to live unless I am
more than her friend, more than her best friend? If
I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
Was I a superman; I was as close to a superman as you could get. More so than Cullen he wasn't a man, he wasn't even human! He shouldn't even be alive! But did that make him more of a superhero than me?
If
I'm alive and well, will you be
There holding my hand
I was there for her and then she just went and left me for a group of stupid blood suckers.
I'll
keep you by my side with
My superhuman might
We
used to be inseparable, "joint at the hip" as Charlie would say,
then I got turned into a wolf, that was the blood suckers fault too.
Kryptonite
Bella
made me weak. Bella made me broken. Was I still weak? You
called me strong, you called me weak
Bella would think I was weak, for running away.
But
still your secrets I will keep
I'll
keep her secret though, I'll take her secret with me to the grave.
I would never tell a living soul.
You
took for granted all the times I
Never let you down
She's
always taken me for granted, just expected me to be there for her,
but what have I ever gotten in return? I promised her I'd never let
her down and I never have. Okay maybe once or twice but they were all
her fault! And how many times had she let me down?
You
stumbled in and bumped your head, if
Not for me then you'd be
dead
I'm the only reason she is still alive. I remember the time in the clearing when that leech, Laurent she called him, was going to kill her. Not to mention the time she jumped off a cliff!
I
picked you up and put you back
On solid ground
Not
to mention I was the one who fixed her after that monster left her,
the monster she is marrying. The images of her broken, when she came
to visit me that first day and the day Sam found her in the forest,
they were painful for even me to see and they weren't even my
fault! I fixed her and she left me broken. If
I go crazy
I was crazy for thinking that this was Bella's fault. She didn't mean to hurt me, it just happened. She still wanted to have me in her life, she loved me, not in the way I loved her, but I could change and her love was enough.
then
will you still
Call me Superman
I was stupid to think that Bella would change the way she thought of me because of Cullen. She just had so much love to give, she will love me just as much as she did before.
If
I'm alive and well will you be
There holding my hand
I know she would be there holding my hand, had I just given her the chance
I'll
keep you by my side with my
Superhuman might
I
might not be able to have Bella in the way I wanted but if I'd let
her, I could have her by my side for ever. I could protect her
forever, even with Cullen there.
Kryptonite
I was wrong, Bella didn't make me weak. I made myself weak.
Kryptonite
It was weak of me to think so badly of her and the Cullens. The Cullens never did anything to me, why did I hate them so much? It was weak to be prejudiced
As
I ran one line stuck in my head;
I really don't mind what happens now and then
As long as you'll
be my friend at the end
I stopped; it was time to go home.
Okay so that's it. Please, please review! I was thinking of doing a similar one for Edward in New Moon, tell me if this is a good idea.
Thanks for reading
Regan94
