AN: Well, I HAD to do it someday…
Disclaimer: If I did own, this probably would have been the REAL reason why Kumo joined the Death Lords. :P
Bad Habits
Beer before liquor…
Sometimes, Oscar found that his blank metal mask was really quite useful. Yes, sometimes it got in his way with breathing, or seeing things, and was the cause of his agitation, but right now, it proved pretty damn useful.
The amount of alcohol the swordsman reeked of was intoxicating and potentially dangerous to anyone who even stood next to him. The mask was, at least, able to stave off most of the alcoholic aura.
Oscar found himself vaguely wondering just how the petite-looking swordsman was speaking in coherent sentences (for the most part) and standing up straight. Scratch that, he was wondering how the swordsman was even alive! The amount of alcohol he had digested must have been lethal to any normal humans…
"There's no fine print in this document, is there?" the white-clad swordsman asked suspiciously, narrowing his eyes at the general direction of the strange, flexible…thing that had appeared before him.
"Of course not." Oscar replied once he turned the other's head five inches to the right so he would actually be looking at his target. "We're just…err…conducting a survey to see…err…what people's handwriting looks like!"
"Oh." The swordsman nodded. "Right, of course. Where do I sign again?"
"Right here." Oscar pointed at the little tiny dotted line at the bottom of the page, after all the teeny-tiny fine print.
The swordsman nodded again and signed his name with great flourish.
Oscar looked down and saw the swordsman's name neatly signed on the paper, declaring that he was SHIROI KUMO.
"Welcome to Gaudium, Lord Kumo…" Oscar bowed and with a flash, teleported them back to the castle, cackling on the way.
Kumo looked mildly bewildered, but as he was dead drunk, he didn't really notice his surroundings much, and immediately passed out on a bed that was conveniently there.
"Oh well…" Oscar shrugged. It saved him from asking which bedroom Kumo wanted, in any case.
As he walked off to tell the Count the great news, he vaguely wondered if lying to someone when he was drunk was a sin. Then, he promptly decided that he didn't really care and went on with his day.
When Kumo woke up, his first thought was, "Oh God, how much did I drink last night?"
His second thought, not five seconds later, was, "Where the hell am I?"
AND THEN he caught sight a blue…thing with big red eyes and a pointy head. And promptly screamed bloody murder.
And that's how Kumo's first morning in Gaudium went.
AN: XP I like writing sillies…Don't worry, there's more to come. I think I'm really, really cruel to our poor Kumo-chan. XD
