Zero...Do you hate me because I'm a pureblood?
Kaname-nii-san...Why did you have to leave me all alone!?
I lay on my bed thinking about Nii-san and Zero, my 'Guardian' partner. Zero declared that he would kill all purebloods, but he has yet to come after me. Kaname-nii-san has left me and become the new power for anti-vampire weapons. If they're fates are decided then where do I stand.
"Yuuki!" I hear my father...no...Kaien Cross knock on my door. "Are you in there?" he opens the door and I stay still, laying on my bed. He sighs and comes to sit beside me. "Do you miss him? Kaname-san." I turn to the side away from him, ignoring his question.
"You can't avoid the results forever Yuuki. Come on, Zero is back from another assignment. Don't you want to see him?" he chides on and I bolt up from the bed.
"Zero?" my voice comes out melodically beautiful to normal humans, but to another vampire or an experienced vampire hunter, they can hear the uneasiness and longing in my voice. "I don't think he wants to see me." To me, my voice sounds dead and sad. But to a normal human, I sound like I'm singing a beautiful lullaby. Which sounds are true? The one that sounds sorrowful to my ears.
Kaname is dead, but lives on in my heart. Zero is now the most powerful vampire hunter and out to eliminate all purebloods...except me. He has my blood flowing through him and I am also the one he loves. I can tell through the taste of his blood. We love each other, yet it is a beautiful forbidden love. How can the only surviving pureblood vampire love the most powerful vampire hunter whose goal is to eliminate purebloods?
"Yuuki! Don't be like that!" Kaien begged me and pouted. A vein popped and I was finally fed up.
"...Get OUT!" I scream at him. I was not only annoyed, but probably the most depressed person...errr vampire...out there. I door swung open and there I see Zero. His shirt with the first two buttons open and his hair slightly windblown. "Zero..."
"Yuuki...I heard you scream and though Kaien had either threatened you or you threatened him." he spoke indifferently as always and his violet eyes pierced through my red ones. I couldn't stand the tense atmosphere and flung the window open with my new powers.
"Yuuki!" Kaien called for me as I jumped out the window and ran away. Out into the depths of the forest. I didn't stop until I knew I was far enough away from Zero and Kaien that they couldn't overhear what I was doing, but if I was in trouble they would be able to track me easily.
I jumped up into one of the trees and lay perched on one of the top branches. I laid my back against the trunk and sighed deeply. Who do I love and who loves me? I feel as if there is no one to love. I'm just stuck in this world without love. If I were still human, tears would fall freely, but I cried my eyes dry when Kaname left me. I no longer hold any tears to shed. The times of when Kaname hugged me and held me close flashed through my mind. The times when Zero was in need and I offered my blood to him. The one time he kissed me and the one time I sucked his blood with my new fangs. Even then, I did not know who I loved. Kaname is my brother, but Zero I've spent practically my entire life with. My feelings for both have grown. I care for both and they're both important to me. Yet I can love neither.
"Kuran-sama?" A voice called from below the tree I was in.
"Call me Yuuki Akatsuki-kun." I corrected him and jumped down from my perch.
"Ah yeah. Sorry Yuuki-hime." my eyebrow twitched at the -sama formality, but I let it slide. I don't like being treated like royalty by my friends. "Anyways, what are you doing out here alone?"
"I can do what I like right? But perfect timing. You love Ruuka right?" I asked the blonde and a blush took over his face.
"Y-yes...but where'd that come from?" he looked away shyly and I smiled.
"No reason...I'm just...confused." I spoke and he raised an eyebrow.
"Confused? About what? Kaname-sama?" he asked and I twitched. I grabbed his hand and jumped back up into the tree.
"Akatsuki-kun...Will you stay with me while I nap here? Guard me please." I ordered him and laid my head in his lap.
"Wha?! Wait a sec Yuu-ki." his face was flustered, but he stopped himself when I pouted. "Yes Yuuki-sama." he sighed and let me relax. I fell asleep in his lap and he stroked my hair softly, reassuringly.
As I slept, memories of when Zero and Kaname alternated to comfort me in hard times ran through my head. I don't know who I love or who loves me. I'm greatly respected by vampires all around the the link between vampires and vampire hunters. Aidou and the rest who attended to Kaname-nii-san are loyal to me and I rely on them to help me. Zero keeps Level-E vampires in check and often acts cold towards me. Of course, I don't get the same feeling of love that he used to be so open about. I want to kiss him again though! The feeling of his pain-filled lips full of regret and frustration pressed against my own soft, loving lips. But no matter who you ask, a vampire and a vampire hunter cannot love each other. I woke up, unable to sleep peacefully enough, but kept my eyes closed.
"Akatsuki-kun...What would you say about a vampire and a vampire hunter falling in love?" I asked him. He shifted uneasily, and seemed to ponder his thoughts. I opened my eyes and stared up at his face. He was looking past the trees, lost in thoughts until he finally answered.
"I think that's forbidden love right there, but then again it always depends on the vampire and the hunter." he paused and eyed me warily.
"What? You have something else to add?" I asked him.
"I don't mean to be rude Yuuki-sama, but is this about you and Kiryu?" he asked demandingly. I flinched and sighed. "I thought so. Zero is out to kill all purebloods right? Yet you love him either way...and he has feelings for you." he spelled out all my thoughts perfectly and I had no choice but to surrender to his brains.
"You're right Akatsuki. Zero declared his hatred and goal to wipe out all purebloods to my face, yet I love him and in order to keep him alive I will keep him from killing me. He said directly to my face that he won't die until he kills all purebloods including me, so I keep running from his grasp. Yet I wish to remain by his side. I want to embrace him and relieve Zero of all his pain. I loved Kaname, but he left me and I'm alone. I don't know who to love and no one loves me. You and the others are indeed loyal to me, but that's not the same as what I seek." I took a deep breath before continuing. "I want the same bond that you have with Ruka Akatsuki. But I want to love Zero!" I groaned painfully and turned over to my side. Tears were about to well up in my eyes, but I blinked them away.
"Yuuki!" Kaien called for me and I knew he was nearby.
"Akatsuki, I'm gonna go now. If Kaien approaches you, please tell him nothing of what I just told you. If he pressures you, just don't answer." I spoke rapidly before nodding to his blank face. "See you senpai." I flashed him a small smile before turning to my butterfly form and fluttering back to my room. On the way, I saw Kaien running around the forest looking for me.
I flew in through my window and turned back to my vampire form when I landed on my bed. I sighed when I was suddenly tackled from the side. My wrists were pinned above my head in an all-too-familiar grip and legs held my own legs. Violet eyes stared into the depths of my ruby orbs and silver hair flashed before me.
"Yuuki." Zero spoke forcefully. He was leaning in so close I could feel his breath billowing over my lips. I wanted to close the gap between us and kiss him, but I didn't dare.
"Zero..." I voice came out as whisper and I sucked in a nervous breath.
"Yuuki...explain. Don't think I don't know what you were talking about with Akatsuki just now. You may be able to fool Kaien, but not me." Zero hissed in my face and my eyes widened. I gulped and bit my lip. When I turned my head to the side and break his gaze, a warm hand turned my chin to face him again. "Don't avoid me Yuuki. And don't bother trying to transform. In the hands of the most powerful vampire hunter, you can't move as freely as you want." I stayed silent and he kept his grip on me. I whispered,
"Of course you know. And you're right Zero." Tears were now falling. I couldn't hold it in anymore and no matter how wrong people thought it was, I stay true to my feelings. "I love you Zero. I love you. I want the feeling of you sucking my blood again. I long for the feeling of your lips pressed against mine. I want you to hold me, comfort me like how you used to!" I screamed at him, surprising him. His grip loosened and I used the moment to force him off of me. "Kaname is gone and I have no one to love and no one to love me! I love you Zero. I don't give a damn about whether I'm the pureblood princess and you're a vampire hunter out to eliminate all purebloods!" I motioned a fierce towards the window and doors and shut them closed and locked. Water dropped down my face onto the floor and Zero's composed himself enough so he looked indifferent and emotionless. This empty face only made me cry out even more though. "I'm the only pureblood out there and the Kuran heir. I'm a weak pureblood princess who depends on others. Zero...no...Kiryu! You're the most powerful vampire hunter out there with a miserable past. You devoured the rest of Ichiru by his will and your goal is to eliminate pureblood vampires. You suffered through more pain than anyone else and endured it all yourself. Nonetheless, I love you. I want to help you embrace your pain and I want you to kiss me!" I declared. The tears were falling like waterfalls and my vision was blurred. "I love you! I don't care if it's forbidden and against the rules! I can't stand this world without love any moment longer!" My hands grabbed his tie and I yanked him closer to me. I relished the moment I could stare into his flawless violet eyes and enjoy his gaze. I pulled his mouth to my neck and he bit in. I felt the pull of my blood flowing into his mouth as he sucked and I fell limp. His arms instinctively wrapped around me and I used this moment to send him all of my thoughts. When he was finished, he pulled away and wiped the blood dribbling down his chin away. I fell back onto the bed and Zero stayed sitting there. He was silent through my entire rant and I knew he had received all of my feelings.
If you won't love me Zero, then no one out there will. Kaname is gone and I have no one else to love. I'll suffer through a world without love. The love in my world has already all disappeared.
I cried myself into despair and didn't wait for an answer from Zero. After my rant, I'm satisfied with all my feelings finally pulled off my chest. From this moment on, I'll live my life without emotions and release myself from all attachments I feel to the vampire hunter. Love no longer exists in my heart...
