A/N: The first in a new N.C.I.S. series I'm starting that will revolve around Tony. The series jumps around the actual canon universe but its easy enough to understand. Enjoy!
Tony looked around at the people surrounding him. Abby's face was shining with pure happiness as she clung to Ziva's arm like they had been friends forever. Ziva herself was standing there with a slight smile, but a glint of something unsavory was shining in her eyes.
Cutting his eyes to the right, Tony saw Gibbs working on some paperwork but there was an air of relaxed contentment around him. Looking even further to his right, he was nearly blinded by McGee's huge, smug smile.
"Ah. . ." Tony tried to speak, but his voice died. Clearing his throat, he tried again, this time with more success. "That's. . .that's a great idea and all, Zeevah, but I've actually got plans for tonight already so. . .maybe next time?"
He watched as the Israeli's eyes widened in surprise before she spoke.
"All right then, Tony," she said, smiling softly. "Next time."
"Great!" Tony replied with a fake laugh. He stood and grabbed his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder as he walked out of the bullpen.
"See you all Monday!" He called over his shoulder, deciding to bypass the elevator and heading towards the stairs.
In his haste to get away, he didn't notice the pair of hazel eyes following him out.
-/-
Tony sighed, relaxing into the corner of his overstuffed couch. He buried his face into his hands, not noticing the tremors coursing through his body.
Thoughts raced through his head. Obviously, Ziva didn't like him. The question was why and was she going to try to isolate him from the team? Abby, in all her innocence, probably didn't know that he hadn't been invited to the party or she wouldn't have went. She was loyal that way. McGee either knew he wasn't invited or just enjoyed being the center of attention, judging by the smug smirk on his face when Tony left. Tony wasn't that close to Palmer but he thought the Autopsy Gremlin was a good kid so he probably hadn't known that Tony wasn't invited. Gibbs-
Suddenly, it was like an elephant was sitting on Tony's chest. His breathing became short and erratic. Gibbs. After all Tony had done for the man's approval only to be treated as if he was still a Probie and then Gibbs welcomes Ziva into the fold like she had always been there? It hurt.
His breaths getting shorter and shorter, Tony tried to push down the emotional wave that was trying to wash him away. Betrayal, heartache, anger. . .it all came up to the surface like blood from a newly opened wound. And, letting out short bitter chuckles between gasps for air, Tony supposed that that was exactly what it was. An old wound that had had time to scab over being ripped open with a vengeance.
It was at times like this that Tony wished Kate was still around. She could always knock some sense into him.
"It's about damn time you admitted it, DiNozzo!"
Tony's head shot up, his breaths still coming in shaky pants, and looked at the person in front of him.
"Kate?"
Kate smiled gently, her eyes softening with sadness as she saw the state that Tony was in at the moment. "Yeah, Tony, it's me."
"But. . ." A fuzzy confusion came into Tony's eyes. "You're dead."
Snorting, Kate sat on the floor, resting back onto her hands so she could look up into Tony's eyes. "Yeah, I'm dead."
"Then how are you here?" Tony asked, bewildered.
"Wild boars couldn't keep me away when you need me, Tony," Kate replied. "I imagine you've heard of Guardian Angels before?"
Tony nodded slowly. "Is that what you are?"
"Yep," Kate said, popping her lips on the 'p'. "And you certainly need one."
"Why? I mean, I could definitely use some protection from perps but why didn't I have a Guardian Angel before?"
Kate shifted, stretching her legs out in front of her. "Because I'm not here to protect you from everybody else. I'm here to protect you from yourself."
Looking away, Tony gazed outside at the city lights unseeingly. "Then you're out of a job. I don't need protection from myself."
There was silence for a moment.
Then, Kate spoke quietly. "Tony. . .what were you planning to do when you got home?"
Tony looked down at her, nervously picking at the knee of his jeans. "I was going to take a shower. Maybe have a drink. Was thinking about going up on the roof for some stargazing. It looks nice out tonight."
Nodding, Kate said, "That's just it, Tony. If I hadn't shown up, you would've gone up there for some stargazing. Then the weight of the past few weeks, especially tonight, would've started to push on your mind. You were going to do something stupid."
A vision of himself standing on the roof, precariously close to the edge, and saying "I've seen this movie" flashed before Tony's eyes. His breath quickened again.
"What are you saying, Kate?" he choked out. "That I'm a coward and I was going to take the coward's way out?"
"No!" Kate exclaimed. "All I'm saying is that you're not Atlas. You don't have to carry this weight around with you. And even if you had stepped of the edge, you wouldn't be a coward."
"Then why did you come here? Why did you stop me, if I wouldn't be seen as a coward?"
Kate lunged towards Tony, grabbing his hands in her cool grasp. "Because you have so much left to live for! You keep up at N.C.I.S. and you'll be Director in no time! Hell, you could go over to the dark side, join Fornell, and be his boss within two years! You can't throw all that away for some foreign liaison officer with a cold heart and no soul."
Tony fell silent. There was something in the way Kate spoke about Ziva that reminded him of the spark he had seen in the Israeli girl's eyes earlier. "Kate? Can I tell you something?"
"That's why I'm here, Tony. Think of me as a walking, talking diary that couldn't give up you're secrets if I wanted to, which I don't."
In a small voice, Tony said the one thing that had been niggling at the back of his mind for the past few weeks. "I don't like her."
Kate blinked. She certainly hadn't been expecting that; Tony loved everyone. "Who? Ziva?" she asked, just to make sure they were on the same page.
Tony nodded. "It's like. . .instead of just making her own place, she's trying to take yours." Then a flash of anger swept through him. "And Gibbs is letting her!"
Resting her head on Tony's knee, Kate said quietly, "Maybe that wouldn't be so bad. Not everyone can see me like you can, Tony."
"That's not fair to you." Tony said, running his fingers through Kate's dark hair. "And I can already feel that you won't be here with me forever, Katie."
"Don't call me Katie," she griped, just for old times' sake. "You're right. I won't be here forever. I'll come back when you need me, but that can't be the only reason you don't like Ziva."
"It's not," Tony said quietly. "She shot her own brother for God's sake! You don't do that!"
"Tony. . .look at what your father did to you. You know how people can be."
"Still. I could tell she was broken up about it which means she had an ulterior motive. Which is strike two. I don't like people who turn on family and I don't like people with ulterior motives."
"What's strike three?" Kate asked, letting Tony get it off his chest. "It's obvious by the way you talk about her that you think she's already 'out' in your book, with no hope of getting back into the game. This one or any other."
Tony sat there silently, again staring at the horizon outside his window. "Strike three was when she pulled Gibbs into her web of manipulation."
"Gibbs?"
"I could handle anyone else," Tony admitted quietly. It wasn't like Kate could go shout his secrets to the world. "I mean, Abby couldn't stand me when I got to N.C.I.S. so to be honest I've been waiting for her to revert. McGee is a great techno wizard, sure, but he's just barely a good agent. He knows this and, subconsciously or not, hates me for being better in the field than him."
"What about Palmer?" Kate prodded gently. "And Ducky? Or maybe the Director?"
Tony laughed humorlessly. "I haven't had the chance to get to know Palmer. Duck. . .losing him would hurt, yeah, but there's nothing real special between us. To him, I'm just an occasional patient. And like you said earlier, if I wanted, I could have the Director's job. She knows this, I can tell by the way she looks at me. Like she wants to make sure I'm not trying to climb up the N.C.I.S. chain of command."
"What do you mean?"
"Me and Jenny have been friends, sure," Tony replied, his speech starting to slur just a little. "but I get the feeling she feels rattled because of my awesomeness."
Kate hummed. "That must be it. Then again, you could be going delusional from lack of sleep. Time for bed."
She pulled him up and together they stumbled to Tony's bedroom, flopping lifelessly onto the plush covers and soft bed. They lay there quietly, just enjoying each others presence before Tony spoke up again.
"Katie?" he called out softly, his voice scared and childlike.
Rolling over, Kate pulled him close to her, running her death cold hands through his messy hair. "I'm here, Tony. I always will be if you need me."
'And who knows? Maybe one day I'll get you to tell me about your Gibbs crush.'
A/N: So what did you think? You like? Please review and tell me that way I can post the second part of the series which is already typed and ready to go.
PLEASE REVIEW~!
~S.
