CHAPTER ONE
Sometimes, there are no answers to the big questions in life
Sometimes, we spend our whole lives searching
Often we're left with more questions than answers.
I was always taught that there are only two types of people in this world, the wolves and the lambs, and when you don't win they tell you it's OK, they're wrong because if you don't die dominating as a wolf. You will die being eaten as a lamb.
"That's it! It's over you're going to forget all about me!" resplendently compared to the voices in the airport Scarlett sounded like she was whispering. "Scar she's not going to forget about you" another voice, consoling this time comforted her. "Will you both stop of course I'm not going to forget about either of you" I looked up at my two best friends both facing me with ample puppy eyes. "I'm just going away for..." "Forever," Scarlett cried while Heath wrapped an arm around her waist and turned back to me. I sighed and pulled her into a tight hug, she hugged me back and said "you better call me, every day, write, email, text, I want to know everything, friends, bitches, teachers, problems, hot guys when you get a boyfriend everything do you hear me?" she rambled and almost mumbled her words because her eyes were covered in tears. I chuckled delicately "promises Scar every little detail I'll keep you involved" She pulled away hesitantly and wiped her eyes. I looked at Heath before engulfing him in a super tight bear hug. I wrapped my arms around his skinny body and he murmured "take care". Heath had never really been good with goodbyes, then again neither had I but I guess you learn with practice.
"GATE 6A your plane is ready to depart, GATE 6A!" the announcement was barley perceptible over the speaker but it punctured my ears. I picked up my suitcases and stared long and hard at my friends. These were the people who knew me better than myself; to leave them behind would be like leaving a piece of me behind. More or less, I needed this to get away something new. This I kept repeating in my head over and over again but no matter how many times I tried to induce myself that this was the reason I was leaving at the back of my mind I knew the truth, knew it better than my own name. As we approached our last goodbye I gathered them both into my arms and they crushed the last recollection of me. I wiped my eyes and stepped back looking around with a hopeful glint in my eye for my parents, as if they would just appear by magic out of thin air. There were reasons I didn't believe in magic. Heath on the other hand noticed my apprehension "sorry Carissa, I know you wanted them here but I don't think its any use waiting." he said the last part almost sadly. I straightened my shoulders and stiffened my body putting on a hard expression hoping it would pass off as if I didn't care "yeah of course, I should know what to expect by now. Mommy's too busy working to even look up from the computer and dad is away on business trips all the time across the world that he hardly even remembers my name. They probably forgot why I got out of the house today. I shook my head and the thought swam back to the back of my head buried with everything else. "Well...this is it" I tried hard to keep my voice from breaking "I'll keep in touch, promise." Scar broke into tears again and somehow managed to blubber a goodbye and Heath stood there and tried to offer a smile, though it came out weak. I picked up my suitcases and began to walk to my terminal. I couldn't bring myself to look back; I wouldn't even though my head was on the threshold of spinning backwards. But the thing is, if you look back you only run back to the past you try to forget. So instead I thought of only what could happen I could be anyone I wanted with a new beginning my only concern is what happens when your memories decide to never let you go?
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On the 9 hour flight sitting next to the most obnoxious people I had ever seen and barely any room to breathe I tried to catch an ounce of sleep if only the six year old next to me would stop screaming at his mother for his toy truck. There was some movie playing on the screen but it was distant and hazy. "Miss... Miss…?" I absently turned my head to the flight attendant with the plastic smile on her face and the very annoyed look in her eyes "oh I'm sorry" I stuttered. She looked extremely irritated and handed me the plate of food I didn't remember ordering. I eyed it skeptically "but I didn't..." the flight attendant had already vanished "...order anything" I murmured quietly and nibbled on a bread roll. After a half hour passed my eyes refused to respond and kept getting heavier with the fatigue of being overwhelmed and soon enough I was passed out indifferent to everything else that was happening.
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"The plane will be landing shortly ladies and gentlemen please fasten your seatbelt and get ready for landing" the shrilly high pitched voice of the overly tired flight attendant rang out through the plane, people all around murmured excitedly and were anxious to land. I however was not one of them, in fact I was completely dreading it, and I had half a mind to stay on the plane and go back home. But then I would only end up running back to the place I was trying to get away from in the first place. I sighed and clicked my seat belt then sat back thinking of some positive things that could possibly happen while I attended Walbridge Academy.
At the terminal once I had my suitcases and bags I looked around not exactly sure of what I was supposed to find, everywhere people rushed to greet their loved ones and to catch their flights. And then there was me in the middle of it all alone and with no idea what I was waiting for. "Am I supposed to call, or wait or catch a cab and go?" I thought to myself wondering who ridiculously stupid I looked at the moment. I turned around scanning the place again and that's when I spotted a tall man wearing jeans and an old fashioned farmer's shirt with a cowboy hat on and a bandanna. From what I could tell he was about probably in his early thirties, late twenties with a very fine chiseled, tanned complexion, his hair was messy and dark falling over his eyes so I couldn't see them but he looked well built, muscles on his arms. He looked like one of those cowboys you would expect to see in the day that robbed banks and saved girls. But the first thing I noticed was that he was standing there with a sign that had my last name on it. He saw me also at the same time and waved. I pulled my cart of suitcases to greet him "hi there are you looking for me?" I asked. "Carissa Vallanger?" he inquired and I took notice to the slight southern accent, "yep that's me" I smiled big as I could and he gazed at me from head to toe. I shifted my weight uncomfortably. "Well hello there Darl the name's Bill, you're car is right this way" he smiled charmingly and tipped his hat then picked up my suitcases. "Thank you" I breathed relieved of the weight. "My pleasure" he grinned and winked again. I laughed nervously although I didn't know why I was nervous Bill wasn't someone that was awkward. I followed him to the Chevy truck probably of the latest version. It was bright red and huge, frankly it kind of frightened me and looked like a monster truck about to eat someone. "Uh...nice car" I said "mhm my baby" he laughed "the classiest way to pick up someone also" I grinned opening up and put my things in the trunk. He was just someone you could talk to easily, I figured that out fast. "So are you like...a taxi driver?" "Well sort of" he climbed into the driver's seat and slammed the door shut. I blinked wondering if I should get on the passenger side or in the back. My question was easily answered when Bill patted the seat next to him and I climbed on shutting the door. "I work for the school, you know pick up students without a ride" he continued to explain as he started the car. The whole time driving he was in a chipper mood and I lightened up glad to see a friendly face "so am I the only stop?" I asked him gazing at the vast state of Washington out of the window "yup you're the only one they told me to pick up" Bill spoke cheerily keeping his eyes on the road. "Is that a good thing?" "well...that depends but I like you so I don't mind if you're the only one I have to pick up" He flashed that charming smile again and with the cowboy hat and southern drawl he was adorable all wrapped up in one. I blushed "you sure know how to make someone feel welcome" I sighed "if only everyone else could be the same way" "Awe come on now you have to give it a chance, never know what you might find" he turned his head to me at a red light and his voice took on that strange mysterious type tone, something flashed across his face but as soon as I blinked it was gone as soon as it came and his bright smile returned once more. I looked at the floor and an uncomfortable silence hung in the air. It didn't last long though because Bill's voice interrupted my thoughts again "we're here kiddo" was all I heard then his voice faded out and I looked out the window at my new home.
