Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Summary: Phil wants to call May sometime of the 1x20 Nothing Personal. Spoilers.

Notes: My first fic in english, resignation.

Thanks to Caris Bennet and Lidia by her beteo. Thanks to suaellenparker by to spread and to defend the Philinda with the idea "Philinda Phone Call" (Tumblr).


A shitty day.

It had been a shitty day.

The only good thing that happened on the day had been saving Audrey and he doesn't think it was the same day. But for her, for Audrey he would always be a ghost memory of a happy past, and that was shitty too.

Who was going to tell him that the biggest surprise was waiting for him in "Providence"?

The payment for his great job, perhaps the payment for all of his lies.

His team was dust in the wind. Ward, Skye and May had disappeared. Billy wasn't anywhere either. His airplane had vanished. His big, wonderful, beautiful airplane had disappeared leaving a large empty space in the hangar. Lola was gone with it. Lola!

What the fuck was happening?

He blinked twice and gave himself a little pinch in his arm.

He tried to wake up of that surrealistic nightmare but it was hopeless.

How the fuck can an airplane disappear?

How the hell can four people disappear without a trace?

His first intention was to call her. Being truthful, May has always been part of the solution, never the problem, no matter how bad things were.

But with her number already in his phone's screen, a childish idea appeared in his brain.

What if Melinda had decided that if they split up she deserved the airplane and two children?

What if May really was Hydra?

He felt a strong pull of hurt in his chest.

That couldn't be.

What if she left simply because he told her so.

Finally, he decided to call Skye.

Skye's smartphone rang more than 20 times. She didn't pick up the phone. Skye always picks up the phone.

The pull on his chest just got stronger.

What if he had lost them? What if he had lost his team forever? What if something terrible had happened to them while he was playing the hero on the other side of the country?

The communication lines were cut.

They found Skye's smartphone and the security phone in Koening's office, where they found nobody.

When Fitz put the only surviving security video, he had only one thing clear. May just… left. Alone. May walked away because he told her so. He was mad and he was mean. He had lost his best friend when he needed her most.

He wanted to kill Trip when he said they didn't need her. He will always need her.

He wanted to call her, to apologize, to request her return, but he knows that she would be well. He couldn't say the same about Skye, Ward or Koening.

Then… Then Ward was Hydra. And the events happened very fast. He hadn't had a free moment in hours.

Hill wouldn't help him. There is no S.H.I.E.L.D. anymore. Garret was alive. Ward was a traitor. They had shot Lola. He wanted to talk to his best friend desperately.

"You have reached the mailbox of 555476514"

Great!

"Please leave your name, number and message after the beep."

Phil took a deep breath.

"Beep"

He had lots of things to say her, but the words wouldn't left his mouth. Seconds passed by in silence.

How could they have ended up in this situation?

He couldn't continue without her.

He needs her. He loves her… She means a lot to him. A lot.

Oh My God!

He missed her so much.

He is so sorry.

He took another deep breath.

"May, this is Phil … I'm sorry, I'm so sorry … I …"

"Beep"

"The mailbox is full"

Perfect! Better than great.

He turned off the phone and threw it on the bed.

He had to get some air.

A really shitty day.


The end

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