Énouement

You never really stop missing someoneyou just learn to live around the huge gaping hole of their absence.

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Hey Elphie, how are you doing?

First, I'll have you know that I think I'm getting wrinkles on my forehead, and it's all your fault. Ruling Oz is a lot tougher than I imagined it would be, and I wish you were here to help. You've always had a better vision for these sorts of things.

Sometimes, I feel like giving up, but then I try to imagine what you'd say about that. I hope you know that you're all that's keeping me going. I wouldn't put it past you to find a way to throw all my shoes into the canal somehow, even without actually being here.

It's such a beautiful day today, all fluffy white clouds and bright blue sky, the kind of day that even you wouldn't be able to resist stepping outdoors to experience. Although I know you wouldn't do anything but read the whole time anyway, because that's exactly what you did when I dragged you and Fiyero out for a picnic when we were back at Shiz.

Well, I suppose you're with Fiyero now. I hope you're happy, I hope you're both happy. Take care of him, won't you? I think he can be even sillier than me sometimes, isn't that shocking?

He loved you so much, you know. It's ever so obvious to me now. Besides, there's no other reason he'd pick you over me if that wasn't the case. Elphaba Thropp over Glinda of the Upper Uplands, imagine that!

But to be honest, if I had to pick you or me, I'd pick you too.

Oh, I hate you, I really do. Just thinking about you makes me so despondiary. I'm crying now, and my ink has smudged. Congratulotions, you've ruined your own letter. Best friends aren't supposed to make each other cry, not like this.

During the festivating, someone asked me if it was true I had been your friend. Did you know that would happen, you deceitful girl? Because of that horrendible promise you made me make, I had to tell them it was all such a very long time ago, and no, you hadn't really been my friend. I don't suppose you'll ever know how much it broke me to say that.

In a way, I didn't lie though. You weren't my friend. You are my friend, and you always will be.

I don't know if you'd still want to be my friend after knowing everything I've done though. It tears me apart, knowing it was me. With my stupid big mouth and my selfishness, I killed Nessa, and Fiyero, and you. It was all me, and I don't know how you can ever forgive me for that.

I'm sorry. Oz, I'm so sorry. Not a second has passed that I don't regret everything I ever did to hurt you.

You probably think I'm being ridiculous writing this, don't you, Elphie? But don't you dare judge me. I'm just lonely, that's all, and pretending you're actually going to read this makes me feel better. Maybe you're already reading over my shoulder right now. If so, you should stop, because that's awfully rude of you!

Speaking of rude, I hope you don't mind that I have that funny little green bottle of yours under my pillow now. Maybe your mother wouldn't mind watching over me as well. Could you help me ask her?

I'll be making a trip out to Kiamo Ko next week, just so you know, to lay this letter where…you know, where you last were. If you want your bottle back, leave me some sort of sign before then, won't you? If you don't mind, I would really like to have it though, as a keepsake. I would have settled for that hideotous hat of yours, but I must have dropped it when Chistery gave me the bottle.

Oh yes, Chistery is doing great, by the way. He's living with me now, along with all the rest of the flying monkeys. I bet you're really jealous that he spoke his first words to me and not to you.

But back to the hat, when I finally remembered about it after all the celebrations and went back to get it, it was gone! Can you believe that? The only thing I can think of is that one of the Ozians must have found it and burned it. I'm sorry, Elphie, I really am.

Don't tell anyone else, but I was just a little fond of that hat. It looked good on you.

I love you so much. Thank you for helping me put my life together. You've always been good at that, haven't you? Helping people, I mean. I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but if I'd known what you would have had to sacrifice—well, it's just that I wish you were still here, with me. Is that so wrong?

You deserved so much better.

I should probably stop here before you get tired of me rambling on. Besides, it's really time for me to be in bed now, before my wrinkles deepen any further.

Stay emerald always! See you later, my friend. I miss you.

Love, Glinda.

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Énouement: n. the bittersweetness of having arrived here in the future, where you can finally get the answers to how things turn out in the real world—what your friends would end up doing, where your choices would lead you, exactly when you'd lose the people you took for granted.