This was something that popped into my head while I was at work today and I almost started writing it on receipt paper (I work in the drive thru at McDonalds... What do you want? I'm only a teenager... I'll find a better job in the future... maybe) anyway, I hope you enjoy this, and I apologize for any ooc. Also this is the first thing I've written in present tense.


Mickey had to find a new job after Ian left. There was no way he could keep working at the Kash 'n Grab.

Luckily, he was able to find a job putting together shelves and cupboards in some factory. Not so luckily he met a man there who not only looked a bit like Ian, but acted like him too. Though he had blond hair, and was more interested in being a paramedic than joining the army. His name was Evan.

Either because he was some kind of masochist, or because he just missed Ian that much, Mickey became friends with Evan.

They would go to bars after work, they talked non stop about weapons and action films, they even got to a point where Evan would give him rides to and from work. Eventually Mickey started inviting Evan to his house at times when he knew no one would be home. They'd mostly just watch movies, get high, and talk about whatever shit was on their mind.

Mickey learned a lot about Evan. He learned about his younger sister, who he wished didn't have to grow up in this neighborhood. His mom, who was a generally good person but he was afraid she would end up becoming a junkie with all the hard drugs she started doing. And his dad, who left them all to get remarried and moved to the north side. He never sent them a penny, even though he was apparently now living like a king up there.

Sometimes, when he was either really drunk (or drunk enough to pretend he was really drunk), Mickey would talk about Ian. He would talk about his friend, who he'd gotten into a fight with right before he enlisted into the army. He'd mostly just say little things, though, every once in a while. Like "Ian hated this movie," "this was Ian's favorite brand of beer," or "Ian could never get high off this shit." Mickey never really noticed when he did this, and because he didn't do it frequently, Evan didn't seem to care, or notice either.

One night, when they were both sitting in the Milkovich's living room, Mickey was probably the highest he'd ever been around Evan. They were watching Apocalypse Now, because, for whatever reason, Evan insisted on only watching movies from the 70s when he was high. He said they made more sense to him when he was high. Mickey laughed and called him "fucking retarded" the first time Evan said that, but he had only looked at Mickey and given him a somewhat familiar shit-eating grin.

Mickey managed to make it through some of the movie, but at the "Ride of the Valkyries" part, something inside him snapped and he felt like he was practically falling down from his high.

It must've been obvious on Mickeys face, because at one point Evan glances at him, then slowly looks back.

"Shit," he says, looking guilty, "maybe this movie was a bad idea with your friend in the army and all …"

Mickey shrugs as if to say he's fine, but can't keep himself from spilling what's on his mind "I don't even fucking care if we're not-you know-friends anymore, I just keep thinking what if he's fucking dead, you know? I wouldn't even know!" He's only vaguely aware of how frantic and stupid he sounds.

Evan bites his lip, like he wants to pick on Mickey for how he's acting right now, but instead puts his hand on his shoulder and says, "Dude, relax. I'm sure he'll be fine. He'll come back and you can go back to being his bestie with matching T-shirts and everything."

Mickey snorts before looking at Evan. His hand is still on Mickey's shoulder, and he has that shit-eating grin that makes Mickey's stomach drop, despite the fact that the face has too little freckles, and the cheekbones aren't as high as they should be, and the jaw is too straight, and the hair color is too bright. It still makes his stomach drop in the same way it used to and for a moment Mickey feels like no one had left him a few months earlier. Before he knows what he's doing, his lips are smashed up against Evan's, and his hand is on the back of Evan's neck. The same way he had kissed Ian on his wedding day. Mickey feels happier than he had in months.

That is until the next second when Evan pushes him away with all his force, yelling "WHAT THE FUCK?" Mickey stares at him blankly.

Evan gets up and backs away from Mickey as if he's diseased. He looks disgusted. "Dude! I'm not-I'm not fucking gay! I was just trying to be nice!"

Mickey sits back into the couch and turns to the TV. "Y-yeah, I know." He's hoping that he can just chalk this up to being too high. He hopes that if he suddenly acts casual enough Evan will just sit back down and go back to watching the movie.

However, Evan is still freaked out. "I'm-I'm leaving. This is weird. That was fucking weird." He grabs his jacket and walks out the door.

Mickey stays sitting there for a bit, as if nothing happened. Finally he turns off the TV, goes to his room, and just sits on his bed in the dark.

He presses the heels of his hands into his eyes until he sees multicolored explosions, and tries to cough out the tightness in his throat. It's the closest he's been to crying since the day Ian left.

He feels like Ian left all over again, and now he's all alone with nothing to do but hate himself.

Evan doesn't talk to him at work anymore.


yes another sad fic for the shameless fandom. even though Mickey is baby, who i want to fiercely protect, I still feel the need to torture him... (It's ok tho, in my mind he eventually has a happy ending with Ian)