A half assed short chapter done in five minutes. Second chapter will be long. This is just to get the story rolling. I am insensitive. I don't care. REVIEW. :D
**** BB and L were twin brothers. They did everything together. They pissed together, they studied together, slept together (not with each other, though their relationship was often borderline gay.) There was no others lucky enough to get in between their brotherhood bond. They were not apart of a circle. It was just them. BB and L. L and BB. BBLBBLBBLBBL.
So one day, as the brothers ate jelly tarts, a subject arose that would change the course of their lives forever.
"I think I'm depressed." Said BB. He licked his finger.
L didn't seem concerned. "Have you tried masturbating?"
"Yes."
"This sounds serious."
"Probably." L nodded.
"It could be those female hormones kicking in."
"I don't have female hormones, brother."
"That's just the hormones talking."
BB considered this. He finished his tart then twiddled with the zipper of his blue jeans. He cupped his bulge checking if his male genitals were still in tact.
"That's not it." He finally replied.
L now seemed concerned. Porn wasn't working and female hormones weren't the problem.
"Why are you depressed?"
"I don't know. One day, when I was butchering the old lady who was across the street, I realized my life was empty. I'm not a singer. I'm not important." BB's usual monotone voice lilted with sadness. "I can't dance. I'm not a nurturing human being. As soon as I pick up a baby, I just want to eat it. Apparently, that's not good, brother. What am I going to do?"
"I'm not quite sure I'm following you. Do you want take up tap dancing?"
"I hate life." Said BB. "I think I need therapy."
"Or you could just kill yourself." Suggested L.
A silence followed, the only sound was L stirring in sugar to his tea.
Finally, BB said: "That would be less expensive."
"You wouldn't need to learn any skills like dancing."
"You can dance on my grave, brother."
"How very kind."
The room had grown with a certain positive energy that had never been there before. BB began to twiddle his hair between his fingers in nervous excitement.
"We must make my death memorable. Something that will give all the news reporters wet dreams."
L clapped his hands together. "A suicide that will shock the ages." And with this, they began to plan for the most epic suicide of the time.
