Author's note - Quick oneshot. How heartbreaking have these episodes been? Jacqueline Jossa is smashing the emotional stuff as always, and whilst the little Joey/Lauren stuff tonight was sad, I wanted more! Why did she have to see bloody Lucy ay? Now she's going to leave thinking the guy she's in love with is dating her bitch of an ex best friend?
Gah. Anyway this is what happens if Abi turns Joey away like in the episode but when Lauren goes looking for him, she finds him.
Let me know what you think xo
His name was on repeat in her head. Need to see Joey. Want Joey. Where's Joey. Shit, pain. God Joey. Need to see Joey. I need a drink – just one vodka. Need Joey. Want Joey.
Walking through the market, people calling out to her; Bianca, Carol, even bloody Lucy, she ignored them all.
Her feet carrying her in one direction, wherever Joey was. Having walked through the market, tuning Lucy's annoying voice out as she checked in the cafe, she stalled in her tracks as she approached Bootys.
Her Mum was in there. Her Mum who's made her all these promises to keep her safe, but is pushing her Dad away and keeping her from Joey.
A nurse at the hospital stupidly asking Lauren if the gorgeous guy that was worriedly looking for her; found her. Didn't take long for Lauren's heart to speed up as she realised it was Joey. Then the questions started about why he came, before the realisation he was just concerned for her stupid drunken self.
He pitied her, worried about her but didn't care about her, or love her.
She'd asked her Mum if anyone had come after that, and hearing her Mother's response of "No darling. Just me and your Dad, but everyone's sending you their love", she knew even now after all this, she couldn't believe a single thing her parents said.
But then he came again, this time it being Abi to stop him, turning him away at the door.
Maybe he cares. Did they not realise it was him she wanted. It was always him she wanted. She wanted it all to stop, all the drama and the fighting. And she wanted him, she loved him.
She'd given up on finding him, but still needing her space, sick of being mothered, she found herself wandering over to the park. And as if she was still in tune him, that's where she found him. Sat on their bench, spinning his phone in his hands.
"You came to see me." Her voice broke the silence, and his head came up in surprise.
He scanned her, her crossing her arms uncomfortably aware how terrible she looked.
He just nodded. "I've been trying to find you." She mumbled, not knowing what to say. She wanted to see him, hear his voice, know what he had to say but now she was with him, nothing.
"Lauren." He dragged his hand down his face. "Should you even be out?" She tensed at his words, tensing more when he stood. "Let's get you home." She screamed at him to stay away.
"Touch me and I swear to God, I'll keep screaming." He held up his hands in defence, not wanting to upset her more.
"You came to see me." She re-said, once she realised he wasn't going to drag her home.
"Yeah" he mumbled, standing awkwardly a few steps away from her. "Just wanted to know you were alright." She shrugged, muttering that she was fine, them both knowing obviously she wasn't. "At the hospital too?"
He shrugged a shoulder. "You had us worried." She laughed bitterly.
"Like you care." He bristled at that. "Of course I do Lauren." He moved to stand in front of her.
"God. When I heard you were missing" his voice trailed off. "Then Al said you'd been rushed to hospital."
Lauren shrugged, people were making it a bigger deal than it needed to be. "Always got to have the attention on me right?" She reverted to sarcasm, her usual defence. "Even on my sister's birthday."
He picked up something in her tone of voice though. "I doubt she cares Lauren. Just..." he paused.
"You're okay, that's all that matters to her." Reaching out to run his hand down her arm, "All that matters to all of us."
She raised an eyebrow, clenching her fists as her hands started to shake.
"Even you?" He looked surprised at her questions.
"Even me."
A cramp through her stomach made her hiss in pain and double up slightly, Joey responding with panic in his voice. "Lauren, babe? Shit. I knew you shouldn't be out here." She shook her head and grabbed at his arm.
"I'll be fine, it's fine. just don't" her voice wobbled slightly "don't leave me."
A few moments of him running his hands down her back as she took in deep breathes to calm herself down, the withdrawal being agony and her body weak, him murmuring reassure and comfort, bringing tears to her eyes.
"I'm 19 and my life is a total mess."
She heard him sigh. "Change it then Lauren."
She bit back her sob. "I can't." She could tell he was trying to stay patient, scared of upsetting her, knowing he should just take her home.
"You can." She shook her head. "I can't. I need a drink." He shook his head.
"We need you." She scoffed. He carried on. "Daughter. Sister. Best Friend. Girlfriend." She met his gaze, but he looked away.
"You need to get yourself better babe." He had no idea how hard it was though. Even if she wanted to, she didn't know how. She must have spoken aloud because he looked back at her.
"You have people that want to help you Lauren, you ain't alone in this." She shook her head, tears unshed in her eyes.
"I am. None of you get it." He was going to speak but she carried on rambling. "You don't want me. Mum and Dad won't stop. Abi should hate me. Whit does. Bradley's gone." Her voice broke then and the tears started, him immediately pulling her in to his arms.
"None of it matters babe." She couldn't speak, too tired, too heartbroken, she'd just had enough. Why couldn't they just let her have a drink, just one, just to make her feel better.
"You matter. You need to get better." Her mumbles of 'I can't' vibrated into her chest. "You don't have a choice. We need you too much to let you carry on like this."
She felt him press a kiss to her forehead, felt his hand brush her hair away, that gesture she adored, felt his arms comfort her as her eyelids dropped and she fell asleep.
