A/N: While waiting for the 23rd (cos I live in Europe), I decided to give this a make over; spellings and grammar, paragraphs, extras scenes and chapters. So ya. Anyone who has been reading from the start might want to keep an eye on the number of chapters, cos that might have changed. Anyway, I hope you all enjoy! Let me know what you think in a review! :)

Disclaimer: I don't own Mass Effect sadly. I only own the personality of this Commander Pandora Shepard.


Hannah Shepard, a short woman with dark, greying hair tied back, and countless frown lines scattered across her face, jogged towards the slight figure leaning against the metal railing looking over the vastly populated dry dock. She was late again, as usual. Her daughter turned at the sound of her mother's heavy footsteps and looked over her shoulder, giving her a cheeky smile.

"Yea know, mom," she began, turning her whole body around fully to face Hannah, leaning her bare elbows on the metal. Her lips twitched as she raised an eyebrow. "Seems like the only one you're bothered be on time for is Hackett."

The commander gave Hannah a wink accompanied by a smirk and waited for her mother's reaction. Instead of indulging in her daughter's humour, Hannah simply rolled her eyes. They were an emerald green; her daughter's own were a carbon copy.

"You said something shady seemed up about your mission details?"

Shepard pouted her thin lips childishly at her failed attempt to provoking her mother. Growing up around Hackett, you noticed the small things. And she'd be damned if she didn't notice something up with Hackett and her mother. She wasn't blind.

"Just seems a little… I don't know. Over the top? Too much for something so small. Just… Strange. I've got this feeling."

"Oh God help us all. You've got that feeling again. Really though, darling, you're being paranoid. Now I'd hurry up if I were you. Wouldn't want to make a bad first impression on Anderson's crew now, would you?"

Captain Shepard sounded as if she was sending off her toddler to her first day of school, zipping up her school bag and looking over her uniform. But her daughter was still her little girl, no matter how many times she went off and saved the galaxy, and Hannah was still allowed to dote on her. To some extent.

"Of course, mom. You don't go wreaking havoc either, alright? I do know where I got my talent for trouble making from."

Her mother made a 'pssh' sound, waving off the comment as if it were a fly, then smiled down at Shepard, pulling her into a hug. With a traditional press of their foreheads together, they gripped each other's forearms, wishing one another luck and went their separate ways. Hannah strutted back up the walkway to the elevator, while Shepard turned towards the exit, where the Normandy and her crew were waiting for her to arrive. They had no idea what they were all about to get into.


"I saw her on the vids, man. Those legs, the hips, that as-"

"Joker, she was wearing armour."

"And it was very flattering. Come on, Alenko, admit it. What catches your eye, eh? The hair that would slide through your fingers like water, the eyes so green you swear-"

"Commander, this is our Flight Lieutenant, Jeff Moreau."

Joker cringed, glancing at Kaidan who was sending him an amused grin, and swivelled his chair around to face Anderson and Shepard.

"H-hey, Commander. Don't worry 'bout the name. Just call me Joker. Everyone does that, right Lieutenant? Heh."

"It's 'cos he thinks he's so outrageously funny," Kaidan added in with a snort, before realising who he was actually talking to. "Uh, Commander.

Shepard looked down at them both, finding herself holding back a grin that was tugging her lips. Joker still seemed to be squirming uncomfortably in his seat as she looked back at him pointedly. She'd let him suffer a little longer.

"I'm sure he is then. Lieutenant Kaidan Alenko, am I right? I read your file. Pretty damn impressive. Remind me not to get into a fight of the biotics with you. I'll probably fail miserably."

Kaidan then accepted that maybe Joker had been right. This woman was attractive. Very. He was right about her hair, black and sleek and cropped to her jaw with short messy bangs on her left. And the eyes… He wouldn't mind having them stare a hole in the back of his head. He wasn't even going to start thinking about Joker's first comments, but then the pale skin of her bare arms just led him to the thoughts anyway.

It was then he realised she had spoken to him.

"Uh, thank you, ma'am. I've worked hard to be where I am."

Did that sound arrogant? It did, didn't it? No, it didn't. It just showed he had confidence in himself…Right? Kaidan mentally argued with himself until he heard her voice again. That alluring, yet commander-y, sexy voice.

"Good," she replied, turning to Anderson, who had been eyeing Joker sternly leaving the pilot looking sheepish, and began moving away from the cockpit. "Hard workers are the ones you can count on the most."

Kaidan felt the tips of his ears going hot and he glared at his console, praying that the Commander would get as far as way from the cockpit as possible. Do not look back, do not look back. Get your shit together, Alenko! Once she was gone, a snicker from Joker tore his attention from his blank stare.

"What?" he asked sharply, his eyes narrowing.

"Dude, you totally just checked her out. Who was right? I was right."

A grumbling sound emerged from Kaidan's throat as he slid down in his chair ever so slightly. His eyes fell on Joker, who was sitting up straight smugly, and looked back at Kaidan, giving him a smirk.

"Asshole."


The night after Eden Prime, Shepard slept badly. In actual fact, she didn't sleep at all. Hours earlier, she had woken up in med-bay to see two big pools of whiskey coloured eyes staring down at her. Honestly, any other time, any other place, any other person, and she probably wouldn't have minded. Alenko's brow was scrunched together in concern and Shepard was mortified to find herself studying his features while he called for Dr. Chakwas. It's just the drugs, she had told herself.

But now, as she lay in her bed gazing up at the stars, she realised that no, it hadn't been the drugs in her system. Just after losing one of her ground squad mates, and there she was, lounging in med-bay, giving her lieutenant a once over. She had never been so disgusted with herself. Of course, when she had insisted that she had to get up to make the call to the Jenkins family, Dr. Chakwas scolded her and she got some sort of pep talk from Alenko about how it wasn't her fault; that she did whatever she could've. She almost replied to him by snapping and telling him that what he had just said was a load of bull, but then remembered that he was probably agonising over the fact that he was why she was in med-bay in the first place. All she could really do without offending him was try and say thank you for the pep talk and carry on.

None of it made her feel better though. The visions of the beacon were still burning at the back of her eyes, making her feel nauseous at both the vivid images and the light headed feeling they caused. Chakwas had ended up giving her some sleeping meds, injecting them into her before she could bring them back to her cabin and flush them down the toilet. And yet there she was, three hours later. Sleep hadn't come to her once yet, even with the drugs that were now flowing through her veins, and which would now most likely make her feel like crap in the morning. Deciding she'd take a break from trying to get to sleep, she stumbled into the elevator to go down into the mess. Although the drugs weren't granting her with sleep, they were making her feel like she had just spent the night in a drinking match with a krogan. Nearly all the crew were asleep, meaning it was probably halfway through the artificial night cycle; maybe 3am. She only spotted two crewmen in the hallway, heading off to their pods. She was then the only one in the room, which suited her perfectly.

As she sat down with a mug of decaf coffee and a data pad, movement in the med-bay caught her eyes. She assumed Chakwas was in her quarters by now, and the fact that the lights were off made the commander all the more suspicious. Setting her mug down and putting the data pad aside, she quietly moved towards the med-bay, as stealthily as her drug induced swagger would allow her. She conjured up dark energy in her fist and opened the door. Instantly, she released it. Lying down on one of the beds was Alenko, an arm stretched across his eyes, only barely moving it to squint at her figure in the doorway. As the light flooded the room, Shepard heard him groan as he replaced his arm over his eyes and forgot to even acknowledge her.

It clicked for Shepard then, as she slid the door closed and used the dim light on her omnitool to root through one of Chakwas' drawers. Of course, Alenko was an L2. She had forgotten that and probably shouldn't have been surprised to see him in this sort of agony.

"Wha-what are you doing, Commander?" she heard come from the bed. She felt bad for him. She had seen this before.

"I had a friend who was an L2, a doctor. She was lucky like you but likewise got the gift of the migraines. She worked out a trick with some meds that aren't really supposed to be used for this kind of thing but she said it subdued the pain for a bit. Just don't tell Chakwas, she'll kill me."

She heard a strained, short laugh come from him, the pain evident in his voice. He seemed to have it worse than her friend Kay. She was bad but Alenko seemed to have it much worse. She finally spotted the syringe she was looking for at the bottom of the drawer and grimaced when she looked back over the mess she had made. Chakwas would notice. If not from the missing syringe, definitely from the chaos that Shepard had created out of the doctor's usual organisation. Gently shutting the drawer with her hip, she held the syringe in a hand triumphantly, taking off the wrapping and preparing it for her fellow soldier.

"Right, hold out your arm, lieutenant. This will sting a bit."

She couldn't see his face at that moment, her eyes instead trained on getting the needle into his vein, but she was almost certain he had rolled his eyes.

"This kicks in pretty fast. Give it about five minutes or so. I'll stay around if that's okay; in case it doesn't work. I've a few other tricks up my sleeve."

At least she told herself that's why she was staying. In truth, if she went back to bed, she would be lying there tormenting herself over Jenkins, and even Williams' squad and Nihalus. They were all losses. She also liked the lieutenant and didn't want him to have to suffer alone. Yeah, that was it. She was suddenly brought out of her thoughts when she heard Alenko let out a sigh of relief, almost of contentment. It brought a smile to Shepard's face.

"That-that really worked, Commander. Thank you. Why did you help me? I mean-uh-why are you up? Uh, if you don't mind me asking."

His stuttering over the confusion with the formalities nearly made her laugh. He didn't have that problem with Anderson, she had noticed. Perhaps it was how familiar she had made herself with her crew.

"Please, Alenko. Leave it at Shepard."

And before she could continue, she saw a half smile appear on his face under the extremely dim light.

"Then I'm Kaidan, ma'am. If-uh-that's not-"

"Nice to meet you Kaidan," she replied with a smile, interrupting him politely. "Now back to your original question…"

The night had not ended as miserably as Shepard had predicted. After vaguely telling Kaidan that the sleeping meds didn't work, they decided if they turned down the lights in the mess hall, Kaidan could go out and sit with some tea and a plate of sandwiches. Shepard was a biotic, sure, and she did have to eat more than most, but a biotic as powerful as Kaidan had to eat tonnes. Shepard sat with him for an hour, watching the stack of sandwiches deplete as they spoke. It was interesting for her; sitting down and having a proper long, casual conversation with someone she didn't know all that well. And they barely even mentioned the Alliance to Shepard's surprise. It was sad, she couldn't remember the last time she had a conversation that didn't centre around something Alliance related. Shepard liked Alenko. She liked him a lot.


Next time: "So," she began, giving him a cheeky smirk as he collapsed into the seat beside her.

He rose a brow and looked at her with suspicion, and then placed his pistol on the table, getting ready to start taking it apart.

"What do you mean, 'so'?"

She turned in her chair, her elbow now resting on the table with her chin on the back of her hand. She felt like a high school girl again and it felt great. She lit up with a grin.

"So, you and our CO seem pretty tight. What happened there?"

If there was ever a time Kaidan wanted to curl into a corner and hide, it was now.