She made me feel things that I've never felt before. I longed to be in her presence, not even being on the phone with each other was enough to satisfy my want for her. I just had to be with her. Sure she drove me completely mental sometimes, she was always worth it. I have never felt this way about anyone, much less a woman. How could I possibly be gay, it just can't be. I know she is gay though, she made that perfectly clear the first day we met.

Flashback:

I'm having such a great time with Ashley. She's so spunky and fun, so confident and sure of herself. There is something different about her though and I can't quite put my finger on it. We were talking about boys because she asked if I left one back in Ohio. When I said "no" she seemed disturbingly thrilled but that quickly changed to a "deer in the headlight" look when I asked her the same question. She went on about how guys are such a pain and that we, as girls, have to sit there and listen to their bull and pretend to care. I laid back a bit on her bed, propping my head on my hand and facing her. When her tirade on men was over, she flopped back on her bed next to me and said "Thank God they are not the only choice." All of the sudden there was this jolt that ran through my entire body that seemed to originate from my left hand. I looked down at my hand to see Ashley's beautiful, tanned, nail-painted hand rested upon my own, as if it were second nature.~

End Flashback

I tried not hanging out with her for a while because I thought it was an influence thing. I joined the cheer squad again in hopes that their heterosexual qualities would rub off on me and that I would be fine. On the contrary, I found myself checking them out in the locker room, just like Ashley said happened to her. I found myself always thinking about Ashley, things I did with her, places we went, thinking about calling her but knowing that I shouldn't. It had been about four weeks since I had even seen her, she had not been in school nor had she called me.

I walked past her locker today and she was actually there for a change. I was so horribly tempted to sop by her and give her a big hug because I missed her but I made myself keep on going. I didn't know what to think of all of this and I needed time to figure it all out. I was nearly around the corner when I heard it.

"Spencer! Hey Spencer!"

Ashley was calling me, I was almost out of her sight and she got me. I couldn't decide if I was mad or happy though. I really did miss her a lot. I really do care about her, no matter what. I just couldn't come to terms with the fact that I might be gay. Honestly, how does one come to terms with something like that.

"Hey Ash, where the hell have you been?"

"Oh, I went to New York to spend some time with my dad."

"Your dad? I thought you said he lived here in LA. Somewhere on the strip or something."

"Yeah, he does but he's been spending a lot of time in New York because some designer is using him for inspiration for a new line that she's naming after him... Yeah something like that. Anyways, she needed female design ideas and what not so my dad decided to fly me out there for a while to help out with this new line."

"Oh wow chica, that's awesome! Why didn't you tell me? I was kinda worried."

"I'm sorry Spence, I really missed you though."

She touched my bare shoulder and ran her hand down my arm, it gave me chills, she knew it did. Sometimes I wondered if she actually already knew how I felt for her but just didn't say anything.

"Oh Ash, I missed you too. Things have been crazy around here since you left."

"What the hell? I was only gone for four weeks!"

"Well, Madison talked me into rejoining the cheer squad, Aiden and I went out a couple times, and Glen had a guy from Duke and ULV offer him some fancy ass car if he promised to play for them."

"Wow, I guess I did miss a lot."

"Yep, you sure did girlie."

"So... you and Aiden huh? Guess I should've seen it coming."

"Aiden is a sweetheart but he's not really my type. Actually, Ash that's kinda something I need to talk to you about."

Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding

"Crap that's the tardy bell, I can't be late to class on my first day back, the last thing I need is to get kicked out right now. Can we talk later Spence?"

"Umm... Yeah... Sure... I guess... Talk to you later."

And with that she gave me a hug and a peck on the cheek and she ran off to class. That is the first time I've ever seen Ashley run to class. Is it the apocalypse or is something funky happening around here. I gotta find out.