Hey, So, I decided to rewrite this because it needed it. I original wrote season 1 into separate chapter but some are kind really short so I decided to compile them into one chapter. So, when you see (Chapter Break) that chapter stopped.
"Beginnings are always messy." - John Galsworthy
Elizabeth J. Hawk halfheartedly watched her teammates from behind her scope of her sniper. She was spying on them as they spied on the Red Team. Yep, a normal Mo-Tuesday? Um... day like a normal day. She was never good at keeping track of time. She shifted on the hard rocks of the canyon wall that slightly scratched reddish tan power on her navy blue colored armor. She fucking hated the reddish color reason, why? Um... She was told to... She didn't know. At least she had something to do.
Private Hawk sighed she shifted the scope of her sniper trying to find the Orange and Maroon soldiers. She had to unzoom and rezoom to find them. Her sites settled on the Red Team's base. What evil thing where they are planning... who was she kidding. They weren't planning anything. She was bored like she was yesterday and the day before that.
"Welcome to Blood Gulch!" said Hawk grumbling to herself. "The most interesting place in the galaxy." She looked back down her sniper rifle at the Red team adjust the scopes and sighed.
"Why am I here?" she asked herself for the 100th time. Even though she knew the answer.
Red vs Blue
All of the Blue team came down to look at the new shiny tank at had been drop off with new the private. Even Hawk came down from her sniper perch. Which was almost unnatural for her. She shifted uncomfortably around them as the new rookie yammered on about being dropped off with the tank. He had said his name was Caboose and somewhat pressured her into giving her own name. It wasn't that he threatened her or anything... He was just so forward about it.
Anyway, they were all currently gathered around the new tank to bask in its glory.
"You know what? I could blow up the whole Goddamn world with this thing." Church said still caught up in the worshiping experience. This cheered Hawk up a little as pleasant vision of explosion filling her mind.
"You know what? Forget what I said before. We can definitely pick up chicks in this thing." said Tucker. Private Hawk blinked opening her mouth to state her opinion before losing her voice because Caboose was staring at her. "Probably two or three chicks a piece"
"Oh, man! Listen to you! What are you going to do with two chicks?" said Church.
"Church, women are like Voltron. The more you can hook up the better it gets." Hawk raise an eyebrow, confused, as she turned around and quickly walked away unsure of how to act. Caboose eye's still on her.
"Hey! where are you going!" Tucker called after her.
"Hawk's probably going up to her nest." She heard Church say his voice get distant.
"Yea I guess that... Wait! HER!" Tucker said in disbelief. Hawk rolled her eyes a smile cracking across her face.
Red vs Blue
"Please!" cried out a young Elizabeth grasping the side of rocky wall of the well. Her wet hair golden hair plastered to her face. Her blue eye filled with fear as blood trickling down the side of her face. She looked up blinking at the blinding light. Suddenly a shadowy figure came into view at the top.
"Help me!"
Red vs Blue
Hawk woke up by her own startled scream shooting up into the sitting position. She struggled to get her helmet as she fingered the latches her hands shaking. Somehow her fever nightmare dream had raised the temperature at least 60 degrees, despite the fact her armor had an air conditioning. Finally her helmet gave way and she manage to down a several gulps of air. It took her a second to calm back down as she reached up and brushed sweaty golden hair out of her blue eyes.
"Just a visit from an old memory" she sighed leaning back into a relaxed position. Then a small flicker of movement out of the corner of her eye caused her sit up immediately.
Not daring to believe it she raised her sniper rifle she looked down the scopes.
"Unbelievable!" She yelled out. "How did that Red get the flag!"
(Chapter Break)
Tucker and Church watch as Hawk climb up to her "nest." Which was small jutted out ledge in the side of the canyon which could only be accessed by jumping and climb from small indications in the side of the canyon wall.
"What do you think she does up there?" asked Tucker suddenly very interested in Private.
"How the fuck should I know?" exclaimed Church. "I think she just likes the privacy."
"Maybe she has been taking food up to her baby hawks!" suggested Caboose thoughtfully. Tucker and Church exchanged looks.
"Caboose you realize that she not really a bird, right?" asked Church.
"Do you think she would teach me how to fly!" ask Caboose oblivious of Church's question.
"Caboose, you're an idiot!" snapped Tucker.
"Hey at least, I knew she was a girl!" replied Caboose turning to look at Tucker.
"He got you there." smirked Church.
"How was I supposed to know! She doesn't talk much." growled Tucker. "She must be very intimidated by me!"
"I don't think she's intimidated by you, more like irritated by you!" replied Church smugly.
"Whatever man! You know what! I bet I can "pick her up" in this tank by the end of the day"
"Oh, you're on! I bet she'll just spit in your face."
Red vs Blue
Private Hawk couldn't believe her eyes. They lost the flag already! She looked down her scoop at the Red carrying the blue flag. Was that the Sergeant? No, she had seen the Sargent leave earlier. So, who the hell was this guy. You know what! It didn't matter because she could just shoot him. She raised her sniper rifle and tried to steady it in her shakings hands. The sound it fired off as she pulled the trigger made her jump a little. She grunted disproving at herself as she lightly shook her head.
'In the middle of a war zone and your jumping at the sound of your own gun fire.' she absents mindedly as gazed through the scope taking at little satisfaction at the fact that the small figure started to hop along.
"Must have hit him in the foot." She said out loud to herself. Suddenly her radio crackled on.
"Nice Shooting!" said Church voice over the radio.
"How the hell did he get the flag!" she spat back over the radio.
"Umm ... I don't really know... Hey, we're are going to cut him off you should meet us there."
"OK." she sighed turning off her radio. "Well at least things are getting interesting around here." She was unable to stop the smile that spend across her face.
Red vs Blue
Hawk sprinted forward as move to intercept the Red Soldier as he came over the hill. She raised her sniper rifle and aim it at his head.
"Freeze!" she called her eyes narrowed.
"You realized that a sniper rifle won't be that good in close combat." The Red dude replied whipping around to face her. He placed on hand on his hip and gripped the flag in the other. He seems more irritated with her then scared.
"Noted!" she replies still not changing her gun.
"Freeze!" yelled Church jump over the hill to meet them again startling Hawk.
"Why the hell were you guys shooting at me?" yelled the Red Soldier now rounding on Church. "You hit me in the foot, dick!"
"Can it!" snapped Church. "Don't try to play dumb with me, Sarge." he paused a full sec before turning to Hawk.
"You know a sniper rifle isn't good at close combat."
"That what I said!" yell Red in exaggerated manner.
"I don't own another gun!" said Hawk her finger become very itchy on the trigger.
"I sure we can find yo-" Church started.
"Let me rephrase that! I don't want to own another gun." Hawk snapped back.
"You guys are crazy! I been here for no more than two hours and I have already meet two crazy people."
"Wait minute, You're not the sergeant!" Church coming to that slowly to that conclusion, probably because of the sass he was getting.
"Yeah, the sergeant left this morning." Hawk said glaring over at Church. "I watched him go!"
"Well then, how the hell did you manage to steal our flag?"
"Steal?" the Red Dude seem take a back with is news as well. "I have no idea what the hell you're talking about."
"What? How can you not kn-" Before Hawk had time to finish that thought a black suit man came running through the teleporter.
"Three!" he yelled waving his gun around like a madman.
"Jesus!" cried out Church.
"What is the -" scream out Hawk jumping back and almost tripping over her own feet.
"Holy Shit!" yelled the other Red dude. "Who is this guy?"
"What in the hell?" yell Church still getting over the shock of the sudden appear. "Tucker! Is that you?" Hawk mouth fell open. It was Tucker, but why the hell was he wearing black.
(Page Break)
"What in the hell?" yell Church still getting over the shock of the sudden appears of this Black Soldier. "Tucker! Is that you?" Hawk mouth fell open because it was Tucker, but why was he wearing black. Her head started to hurt.
"How did you get up here ahead of me?" asked Tucker looking around at them in amazement.
"And what's with that black shit on your armor?" asked the Red Dude frown disapprovingly.
"Hey!" yelled Tucker noticing the Red for the first time and rounding on him. "Freeze, Sarge!"
"Will you stop calling me a sergeant?" snapped the Red now past the point of frustration. "I'm still just a private."
"The Sarge is still a private?" asked an even more confused Tucker. "Oh my God! The teleporter sent me back in time!" There was a small pause after this as this line was processed before Hawk facepalm.
"I work with idiots." she whisper under her breath.
"Now you know how I feel!" Church whisper back.
"Look, I know you don't know me, but you have to believe what I'm about to tell you." said Tucker turning dramatically to Church. "Sometime in your future, I get stationed here in Blood Gulch, and we meet. And this guy here, he gets promoted to sergeant of the Red Army, and we spy on them. And they get this new jeep, and I'm all like there is no way you can pick up chicks in a tank!"
"Tucker, what the fuck are you babbling about?" asked Church in a deadpan tone.
"I am pretty sure you can pick up chicks in a tank!" Hawk frowned. Church and Tucker both turned stared at Hawk before Tucker excitedly turned back to Church.
"You owe me 5 bucks in the future." stated Tucker crossing his arms.
"What, no the bet was you couldn't pick her up in the tank!"
"And she said I can pick up chicks in the tank." explained Tucker "Chicks include her, Past-Church."
"You guys made a bet on me!" asked Hawk. Church and Tucker both turned to look at her.
"No, not us!" said Tucker and Church immediately looking away.
Hawk let out a sigh adjusting the zoom on her sniper rifle as Tucker finish his "time travel" story.
"Anyway, I know all this sounds crazy, but he eventually became a sergeant, and then one day we get a tank, and he comes and steals our flag while we're distracted."
"Is this guy a retard?" asked the Red Dude.
"Red, shut up." snapped Church the same time Hawk mutter her words.
"Oh! Shut up!"
"Tucker, Listen to me." Church said turning to Tucker again. "You haven't gone back in time, OK? This is the guy that stole the flag. He's just not the sergeant. Turn out he's just some dumb rookie who happen to have the same color armor as him. -" He was going to explain more but Hawk interrupted him.
"Hey, Red!"
"Yeah, What?"
"Trade you that dumb flag for this cool hunting knife." She said pulling her knife out of its sheath on her hip and show it to him.
"Done!" said the Red Dude.
"What?"
"Really?"
"Yeah, this flag is stupid anyway! I just didn't want to head back to base empty handed." explained the Red Dude holding out the flag and reaching out for the knife at the same time. The flag was within inches of Hawks fingers.
"What is that music!" asked Church looking around. Hawk paused frowning as loud polka music could be heard echoing around the canyon. Suddenly a big vehicle went soaring over the hill jumping over them.
"Holy Shit!"
"Jesus!"
"Run!"
"It the Red's car!"
"The jeep followed me back in time!"
(Chapter break)
Suddenly a big vehicle went sourcing over the hill jumping over them and landing with crash. The jeep proceeded to open fire on them.
"Holy Shit!"
"Jesus!"
"Run!"
"It the Red's car!"
"The jeep followed me back in time!" yelled Tucker as they ran up the hill and behind the rock near the side of the canyon.
Their they stayed, crouched behind the rock as the sound of gunfire filled the air. Hawk frowned as looked around at each other, unsure of what do.
'Wow we really are just a much of idiots in the midden of box canyon.' A small smile crossed her lips. 'Strangely, I am still fine with this.' she thought leading back adjust the rock as awkwardness stretched between them.
Finally, Church spook up.
"Well, we'll just wait here. That things got to run out of bullets sometime."
Red vs Blue
For what seemed like hours passed and the sound of bullets didn't die down.
"My God, doesn't that thing ever run out of bullets?" Church asked finally.
"Maybe they brought extra rounds." Hawk shrugged lightly fiddling with her gun.
"You know, in hindsight we should have brought the tank." said Tucker looking hopefully in the direction of blue base.
"Hey, Tucker," snapped Church back rolling his eyes. "what good is a tank going to do us if nobody here knows how to drive it?"
"I heard that it like driving on a stick." mutter Hawk now adjusting the scoop on her rifle.
"OK, does anyone here know how to drive on a stick!"
"Bow Chicka! Bow Wow!" sang Tucker. Hawk rolled her eyes and sighed.
"I think that a no!" she mutters.
"Well we are still in the same problem then!" said Church.
"Yeah, I can see hiding behind a rock is a much better strategy." said Tucker sarcastically.
"Well, yeah, but - oh, man. I guess I gotta give that one to you."
Suddenly all gunfire stops. They all exchanged looks before Church peaked over the side of the rock.
"Hey! They stopped firing!" He said in a whisper voice. Both Hawk and Tucker both stood up and exchanged looks.
"Why are you whispering?" asked Tucker following her train of thought.
"Um, I don't know." he said back still whispering.
"Then stop, it's creepy!" Hawk told him crossing her arms.
"Oh! Really I'm acting creepy!" Church throwing up his hands. "At least I am trying to get the flag."
"Let me remind you that so far I am the closest one to getting the flag back."
"Yeah, letting him have your knife was a pretty good strategy!" agreed Tucker.
"I wasn't going to let him "have" my knife!" said Hawk shaking her head."I was going to let him "borrow" my knife for the day. Then at nightfall I would sneak into his base where I would forcefully take it back." Church and Tucker looked shocked at Hawk.
"Umm... So, you were lying when you said he could have the knife." said Church glaring at her.
"Lying is such a strong word ... I prefer manipulated."
"Yeah right, like you be able to sneak into Red Base."
"Oh, Shu-"
"Guys, we can probably take the jeep." mutter Tucker pulling them back into the current problem.
"What?" asked Church and Hawk turning to glare at them.
"They left it unguarded."
"Tucker, don't be stupid!" said Church walking over a peaking over the rock. "They're just trying to draw us out."
"No, they're not. Look." said Tucker pointing in the direction of the jeep. "They left the jeep. They're gone."
"I bet the idiot even left the keys in the ignition." smirked Hawk coming to stand next to Tucker.
"Well, I don't know about this." Church frowned deep in thought. "It seems pretty fishy, but – alright, screw it. Let's go get it."
(Chapter Break)
"Well, I don't know about this." Church frowned, deep in thought. "It seems pretty fishy, but – alright, screw it. Let's go get it." Church getting up from behind the rock and sprinting down the hill. Hawk exchanged a look with Tucker before quickly following suit. They were halfway down the hill when the jeep exploded.
"Son of a bitch!" yelled Church as they quickly before 180 and raced back up the hill. Hawk was panting when she reached the top. 'I need to work out more' she thought to herself. 'But that would require me to exercise and work.'
"Hey, Dude! The jeep blew up!" yelled Tucker still reeling from the shock.
"No kidding. Thanks for the update, Tucker." said Church sarcastically. Hawk rolled her eyes as adjust the zoom on her rifle again. This was quickly become a nervous habit. Church meanwhile peeking over the rock again.
"Hey Guys, look at this, man." he said sounding impressed. Hawk frowned turning around and peeking over the rock. "It's the rookie, and he brought the tank out to scare off the reds."
"What! No way!" exclaimed Tucker in disbelief but sure enough they're was the tank shooting at Tucker's rock that Reds were currently hiding behind.
"At least someone around here knows how to drive on a stick." said Hawk smirking feeling slightly proud of her team. 'Take that Reds'
"Hey Rookie!" called Church running out from behind the safety of the rock. "Good job, man! Why didn't you tell us you knew how to drive the tank?"
Everything seemed to slow down as the tank slowly turned to face Church.
"Yea that's right! It's me, Church!" he continued to yell out unaware of the danger. "What's goin' on, man?"
Hawk's six sense went off. A sense she had developed through childhood. She scrambled away from Church before she even knew why.
"What! Oh, son of a bi-" yell out Church before he was blown to kingdom-come by the tank.
"Holy fuck!" yell Tucker
"CHURCH!" screamed Hawk running forward the limp body.
"Church, are you OK? Talk to me! Church!" Tucker yelled as Hawk looked over the body. "Is he OK?" She ignored him her heart in her throat. She checked what she believed to be his vitals. She real should have taken first aid or something.
"You shot Church, you team-killing fucktard!" Tucker yelled out at the tank sounding pissed.
"He dead!" said Hawk glanced up at Tucker with an expression of solemn. The expression turned into terror as Church body suddenly violently twitched. She jumped her feet her heart pound in her chest.
"Don't worry baby, you can still give me a check u-ow" Tucker was cut by an elbow to the chest.
"Tucker – Tucker!" gagged out Church.
"Church! It's going to be OK, man." said Tucker trying to be reassuring.
"No." he hoarsely whispered. "Ah – I'm not going to make it. Tucker, there's something I need to tell you."
"What is it?"
"I just want you to know." He paused dramatically. "I always hated you. I always hated you the most."
"Yeah, I know you did." said Tucker sounding tired. "Now hurry up and die you prick."
"Hawk do me a favor." Church whined. "Don't let him pick you up in that tank."
"Oh, Church!" said Hawk shaking her head slightly. "That was never going to happen."
"That my girls!"
"Way to cock block me dude. Just die already!" Tucker snapped.
"OK! Herk Bleah-!"
Red vs Blue
Much later after a short really non-existent funeral for Church. The "living members" of the Blue team were back out in open. Using the tank to fire at the red base.
"Why do you keep firing at the jeep?" asked Tucker as the tank hit the jeep into the red base again.
"Because it's locked on!" yell Caboose sounding frustrated.
"Target locked." said the tank confirming what Caboose said.
"Well, unlock it." said Tucker as if it was a simple switch.
"Last time I unlocked it, I killed Church!" yelled Caboose.
"Oh, right." said Tucker slowly.
"Stay on target! Stay on target!" Hawk whispered hurriedly.
"Keep shooting the jeep, then." said Tucker turn back to look at Red base. Hawk was currently perched on the side of the tanks her feet swing over side. Hawk was smiling uncontrollably as more explosion danced over Red base. "I always liked the fourth of July." she smiled.
"It's not the fourth of July." said Tucker as he too watched the Red base.
"There's are explosions!" she argued halfheartedly. Tucker open his mouth to reply when a long black shadow fell over them.
"Uh Oh!"
(Chapter break)
"Uh Oh!" mutter Tucker looking up. Hawk mouth dropped open as airplane flew overhead. The planes began to drop bombs down toward them.
"Hey Caboose!" said Tucker rapidly back up. Hawk quickly hopped off the tank following him. "You might want to get out of the tank. Like, right now."
"I can't figure out how to get the thing open!" yelled Caboose trying random buttons.
"Night vision engaged!" said the Tank not helping the situation.
"Rookie! Get out now!" yelled Tucker a few hundred feet away. Hawk stood beside him looking down her scope at Caboose.
"You realize we are close enough to see him, right?" ask Tucker taking his eye off of Caboose for a second.
"I been adjusting this thing all day!" Hawk said calmly. "Leave me to my simple pleasures."
"Uh, Sheila will you please open the door?" Cabooses panic voice filled her ears pull them back to matter at hand.
"Driver canopy open." said the tank letting out her hostage. "Thank you for using the M8O8V Main Battle Ta-" The tank exploded flipping over shaking the ground as it fell onto it back. Caboose sprint full burst toward them. He arrived panting.
"That was close." he said.
"Look at your tank, though." said Tucker looking at the remains. "How am I supposed to win the bet with Church, Now!"
"What bet! He's dead!" said Hawk want to shoot Tucker so badly.
"Sheeilaaa!" Scream Cabooses seeming more upset with the tanks passing then with Church's. "Nooo!"
"What?" Tucker looking around "No! Sheila! Sheila!" He paused for second again. "Wait, Who's Sheila?" He turned to Cabooses questioning like.
"Sheila's the lady in the tank." said a heartbroken Caboose. "She was my friend!"
"Oh! Dude! I knew you could pick up chicks in the tank!" exclaimed Tucker. "Church owes me five bucks!"
Red vs Blue
"Come in blue command! This is Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha. Do you read me?" asked Tucker over the radio. Hawk was back on her preach trying to relax. It was harder than it should have be. She had resorted to eavesdrop on Tucker as he tried to use the radio. She looks down the scope at Tucker and smiled. He had removed all the black stuff from his armor and was back to his aqua color.
"This is Blue Command." The radio crackled on. "Come in Blood Gulch Outpost Alpha."
"Hello, Command!" said Tucker sounding relieved. "We need help."
"Roger that, Blood Gulch." said a boring drawled out voice. "What is your request?"
"I don't know what the technical military term is for it but, uh, we're pretty fucked up down here." Hawk rolled her eyes at the statement of the year. "We need men!"
"Dude, how long have you guys been down there?" Hawk burst into giggles at the implied statement. She quickly stopped for the sound she made sounded preteen.
"No, no." said an embarrassed Tucker. "Not like that. We need more men to help us."
"Roger that. Did you get the tank we sent?"
"Yeah, that got blown up too."
"Wow." said the boring command dude. "Sucks to be you."
"Yeah, we know."
"OK, here's what I can do. The nearest Blue forces can be there in 16 days, or I -" Tucker interrupted him swiftly.
"16 days? That's almost two weeks!" Hawk rolled her eyes at his math.
"Or I can hire a nearby freelancer and have him be there within a few hours."
"I like the "in an hour" one." said Caboose join in on the conversation.
"Yeah, me too." said Tucker agreeing with him. "Roger that Command. We prefer the quicker solution."
Hawk turned off her radio leading back adjust to rocks. So, they were sending in a freelancer to solve the problems. Hawks eyes started to get heavy for the weight of the day. Whoever he was. He could deal in the missing flag. Not her. She drifted into uneasy sleep.
"Please!" cried out Elizabeth grasping the side of the rocky wall of the well. She looked up blinking at the blinding light. Suddenly a shadowy figure came into view at the top.
"Help me!" cried out Elizabeth reaching out for the figure. Musical laughter filled the air and Elizabeth shudder slightly.
"Maybe Later!"
"Come on, it's freezing down here." Elizabeth her fingers reach up brushing the side of her head. Looking down at her hand it was covered in blood. She felt sick at the sight of it. She must have hit her head on the way down.
"Well you're not going to be much warmer up here."
"Hawk!" said a new voice. Elizabeth looked around trying to locate the person.
"Hawk!" It repeated again. Elizabeth frowned, "This wasn't part of the memory."
"Hawk!" Hawk bolted up, coming face to face with the ghost of Church.
(Chapter Break)
"Hawk!"
Hawk bolted upcoming face to face with the ghost of Church. She let out startled shriek and tried to deck him. Her hand ended up soaring through him and hit a rock instead.
"Man, I wish I had my camera." laughed the ghost of Church hovering a few feet away. "You should have seen your face." Hawk who was nursing her hand looked up and scold.
"Relax, you still have all your fingers!" This respond brought her no comfort and deepened her frown. "Anyway!" he coughs clearing his throat. "Hawk! Hawk!" he called out in a ghostly voice. "I am the ghost of Church, and I've come back with a warning!"
"Is it don't get blow up with a tank!"
"What, NO!"
"Because I already learned from your example and took notes."
"Alright! Stop!" he snapped returning to his normal voice. "The warning is about Tex!"
"Who?"
"Tex! The freelancer coming later today."
"Oh, What about him?"
"Well you see when I was station Sidewinder before they transferred me here to Blood Gulch, and well you see. Tex kind of murder everyone there but me." There was pause before Hawk spook up.
"She your girlfriend you keep talking about isn't she."
"What!" exclaimed Church looking at Hawk with utter shock. "How did you figure that out."
"It's a girl thing." She said crossing her arms and leaning back looking smug. Church blinked looking confused.
"The murdering everyone at sidewinder or the fact I keep talking about her?"
"Both."
"Sure." mutter Church rolling his eyes. "Bitch. Anyway, don't let her involved here, O.K.?"
Hawk frowned turning away from Church as flicker of movement caught her eye. She looked down her scope at blue base and frown.
"To late!" she sang softly as she watches black suited lady head towards Red base.
"WHAT!" yelled Church looking over her shoulder and down her scoop.
"Damn it" He vanished and quickly appear down at blue base. Hawk sigh before beginning her own descent down from her perch
Red Vs Blue
"What was the one thing I told you guys that last time I appeared?" Hawk could hear Church yelling as she approached the blue base.
"That Sidewinder is cold?" ask Caboose who had clearly no idea what the last conversation was about. Church let out moan of frustration that made Hawk smile. It was nice to see someone beside herself become upset.
"What was the other one thing I told you?" he growled.
"Not to let him get involved?" asked Tucker.
"Right." said Church turning to Tucker. "And what did you do?"
"We let him get involved." said Tucker slowly.
"And not just a little involved." said Church turning to Caboose. "How involved?"
"Very, very involved." said Caboose slowly.
"You sent Tex over there!" said Hawk finally making it to the top of the base. "Oh, and thanks for wait for me!" she said turning to face Church.
"You made it up here alright." said Church matter a fact.
"Whatever, asshole!" she growled walking up to edge of the base and looking through her sniper rifle at the Red base. "Do you think they captured her!" she asked watching the Reds run around like ants. Caboose walk up beside her and looked through his sniper rifle.
"Yep, he's definitely captured." said Caboose. He paused for a second think. "Or dead. Captured or dead." he paused again before letting out a traumatic gasp. "Or captured and dead!"
"Oh, well that's just perfect!" said an already pissed Church.
"What?" exclaimed Tucker turning to Church. "What is your problem! Why do you even care if he's captured?"
"Because it his girlfriend, Dumbass!" said Hawk still look down her sniper rifle.
"What?"
(Chapter Break)
"Let me get this straight." said Tucker still trying to get a grip on things. "You're telling me that the guy that show up here, scared the living shit out of us, shot at Caboose, and beat the hell out Reds wasn't a gut at all? That he was a chick? And on top of that she was your ex-girlfriend?"
"In a nutshell, yes."
"Wasn't it obvious?" as Hawk frowning looking over from where she sat swinging her legs over the side of the base.
"No! It wasn't" said Tucker sounding slightly cross.
"I should have known." said Caboose causing heads to turn in his direction. "She didn't like me. Girls never like me." Church and Tucker turned to look at Hawk. She looked back up at them and frowned.
"What?"
"Aren't you going to say something." asked Tucker.
"No! I don't like any of you!" said Hawk scowling.
"That's the same here." said Ghost Church with a smugness that didn't apparently die when his body did.
"Well I like all of you... expert Tucker." Said Caboose happily.
"Caboose, I don't think anybody likes you." said Tucker obviously mad about the comment.
"I like me." Caboose said sadly.
"I don't think I've seen a girl that mean before, even Hawk isn't a total bitch."
"Wow, thanks." said Hawk sulky turn her back to them.
"Are you sure she's a chick and not a guy or like part guy, part shark?"
"I'm pretty sure I would know if Tex was a guy, and I'm definitely sure I would know if she was part shark." confidently said Church.
"Maybe we should ask Hawk if she part shark. Since you know she's part bird." suggested Caboose.
"What?" said a generally confused Hawk.
"Shut up Caboose." snapped Church. "And you can't blame Tex for being so aggressive. It's not entirely her fault to begin with."
"Oh, it that time of the month." said Hawk adjusting her scope.
"No, gross!" gagged Church.
"He means you should blame God." said Tucker turning to look at Hawk. "First, he makes hangovers, and now half women, half sharks that won't even sleep with me." He looked up at the sky and screamed. "Thanks for nothing, God."
"Will you shut up with that!" said Church. He let out a sigh and started to explain. "She got recruited into some kind of weird experimental program back during basic where they infused her armor with this really aggressive AI. I'm not really sure how it all works but all I know is it made her meaner and tougher than hell."
"Sound like puberty." smirked Hawk looking in Church directions.
"Would you shut up."
"AI" mutter Caboose trying to get him mind around it. "What's the A stand for?"
"Asshole." said Hawk.
"Artificial." corrected Church. "But that not far off."
"What's the I stand for- ." Caboose started to say but was cut off by Church.
"Intelligence!"
"Ohhhh... What was the A again?"
"Let's move on!" said Church calmly.
"So, the military put this program in her hand, and that program made her a killer, but underneath it all she's really just a sweet, down home girl?"
"Oh, hell no. She always been a rotten bitch." said Church. "It's just that now she's a rotten bitch with cybernetic enhancements.
"Wow!" said Tucker strictly. "Sounds like you really won the lottery with that one. Good catch there, buddy. She keeper."
"Do you want me to shoot him?" asked Hawk turning her gun on Tucker.
"No, Not that sniper rifle. There no way you could hit him." said Church smiling. Hawk turned abruptly on him raising the gun and aiming it at him.
"I will fight you to the death!" said Hawk turning her gun on Church.
"I am already dead!" said Church looking at her in disbelief.
"Then you already lost!" she said turning her back on him again. There was awkward pause before Church turn to Caboose."
"So how are you doing, Caboose?" he asked. "Are you following any of this whatsoever?"
"I think so." Caboose said slowly. "That guy Tex is really a robot, and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you a gay robot!"
"Close enough." said Hawk laughing.
"Yeah, that's right. I'm a gay robot." said Church sarcastically.
"Who also a ghost." said Hawk still smiling. "Also, are we just going to keep slimming over that detail. I mean are we ever gonna explain how you came back or we going to explain later in you know... maybe a plot twist.
(Chapter Break)
"Well, don't worry, because I have a great plan for how we're going to rescue Tex." said Church said confidently.
"A plan?" asked Tucker "Oh, man, I hate plans. That means we're going to do stuff. Can't we just have a strategy or a mission statement?"
Hawk sighed pulling her feet up from over the edge she stood up and went and stood by Caboose.
"I am in to whatever plan you got if it stops Tucker from bitching." said Hawk placing her sniper on her back and pulling out her knife.
"I am not bitching!" said Tucker glaring at her. "That's your job."
"Look, I just need you guys to run distraction while I spring Tex." said Church stopping the fight before it could start.
"Distraction?" asked Caboose still confused. "Huh. That sounds a lot like decoy."
"The way I see it, the Reds have absolutely no idea how many freelancers we have out here." explained Church. "So, all I need from the three of you is to run around in the middle of the canyon wearing black armor while I sneak in the back of the base."
"Sounds good." said Tucker agree a little too quickly. "But Church, Where the hell are going to get three suits of black armor?" Church slowly turn to look at the teleporter. It glowed green almost if it was laughing.
"Oh, fuckberries." swore Tucker. Hawk sighed looking over that Tucker then walking to teleporter.
"Yolo." she sighed before sprinting through the teleporter.
Red Vs Blue
When she came through the teleporter Tucker was already there with Church. Tucker's aqua armor was now had black bits stuck to it.
"Told you she probably wasn't dead." said Tucker to Church.
"What the hell!" scold Hawk looking over at Tucker. "I went ahead of you!"
"Yeah, it's apparently guys first, children and women last in the teleporter zone!" said Tucker turning to look at the teleporter.
"Sexist Teleporter." Hawk said turning to look at the teleporter as well. There was a long pause before she realized something. "Hey, where is Caboose!"
"Oh, he didn't want to go through until you came though." he said turned around and called over to blue base.
"Come on Caboose!"
"Does it hurt?" asked Caboose yelling the question.
"No, not at all." yelled back Tucker.
"OK! Here I come!" Caboose yelled before turning running into the teleporter.
"Does it hurt for real?" asked Church look over at them.
"Oh, yeah. Big time!" said Tucker
"Most painful thing you will ever experience in your life." confirmed Hawk nodding. They all turned to look at the teleport and sure enough out came Caboose.
"Ow! Geez!" he yelled out in pain. Then he slowly turned around to face Tucker. "You lied to me!"
Red Vs Blue
"Tucker comes in man! This is working! The orange one is coming out of the base. I repeat." said Church through her radio. She Tucker and Caboose where hiding behind a rock like a bunch of idiot. "The orange one is coming out of the base."
"Roger that." said Tucker trying to sound all spy like but come off as just lame.
"Oh, oh! Tucker, Tucker. Is that – is That Church?" barked Caboose sounding a lot like a overly excited dog.
"Ok, just keep moving outside the base, and draw their attention." Church babbled on unaware of the distortion come from Caboose.
"Tell him that I – that I said from me to say hi." Caboose said happily.
"Wait, wait, wait! Hey, what? I missed that." Tucker said into his radio still trying to communicate with Church. "Caboose is talking to me." Then he turns toward Caboose. "Shut up, man I'm on the radio!"
"Dude, if you yell like that they're going to hear us!"
"I said just keep moving -"
"I'm not yelling! I'm just telling you two to let me finish talking to Church!"
"Well tell him I said Hi" said Caboose.
"No, I'll tell him you said hi later." said Tucker. Hawk sighed cocking her gun and spat out the words.
"Fuck this!" She then came running from behind the rock and firing blindly at the red base. None of the shots were accurately since she was blindly shooting with a sniper rifle, but then again there weren't meant to hit.
(Chapter Break)
"Fuck this!" Hawk yelled interrupting the conversation. She darted out from behind the rock and started circling around the base firing blindly. Tucker blinked in shock looking over the rock at the rampaging Hawk.
"She realizes she not hitting anything! Right?" he said over the radio to Church.
"I think she knows!"
Red Vs Blue
Hawk circled the base blindly shooting before making it back to the rock. She dived behind the rock and waited. Nothing happens no returning gunfire or retaliation. Hawk looked over at her companions or companion.
"Where is Caboose?" she asked Tucker. Tucker simply pointed up. Hawk traced his finger with her eyes until they land on Caboose. Caboose was preached on top of the rock pointing a sniper rifle at the red base. It would have been impress image if it wasn't the idiot Caboose doing it.
"Caboose what are you doing?" asked Hawk frowning.
"One of the Reds has Tex." said Caboose very slowly. "I'm going to shoot him and kill him and free Tex. Then Church will forgive me for killing him, and we will be friends."
"Oh come on!" yelled Tucker squinted up at him... "You don't actually believe any of that do you?"
"Oh, we're gonna be best friends." said Caboose lining up the shoot.
"Caboose, I don't think Church has the ability to make best friends." said Hawk reloading her sniper rifle. A single shot from Caboose's sniper rifle rang out. Tucker frown peeking out from behind the rock.
"Did you hit him?" he asked.
"Yes, now me and Church will be best friends and -" sang Caboose happily.
"You gotta be kidding me!" Church's yell could be heard ring around the canyon.
"Tucker did it!" said Caboose imminently.
"I suggest you run!" sang Hawk finally finished loading the bullets in her sniper rifle and closing it up with a click. Caboose took her advice and spirited back to base. She could see Tex following close behind. Tucker turn to look at her.
"Shall we go!" he motions in the direction of the base. Hawk open her mouth to reply when it was interrupted by someone yelling. She turned to see that the reds had come out of the base.
"Sarge! Don't you give up on me soldier. Do you hear me?" yelled the orange one as he hit the Sarge's body "I am ordering you! You gotta breathe, man! You gotta pull through! Come on, Sarge!"
She and Tucker exchanged and look then both squatted down for the show.
"Grif, this isn't working. We have to try something else. Maybe you should give him mouth to mouth?" said the maroon one. Hawk clicked her tongue in disprove.
"Yeah, right! Like that will work." she whisper to Tucker.
"He's breathing! I saved Sarge!" yelled the orange one.
"What?" Hawk spluttered in disbelief.
"Maybe you should brush up on your medicine." smirked Tucker.
"Maybe you're right! Maybe I should just shoot you and try it out for myself."
"Oh yeah, mouth to mouth! Bow Chicka Bow Wow!"
"Maybe we should just get back to base."
"Oh, come on, when you go aqua you never go back!"
(Chapter Break)
Hawk spent an hour up on her perch trying to get the black stuff off her armor and grumbling about it the whole time. After she was finally done she made her way down the wall to rejoin the blue team. She could see what looked like Tucker and Caboose talking. Tucker was freed from the back stuff, but Caboose wasn't.
"Man! You know, this stuff does not come off easy." said Caboose annoyed.
"Yeah, this was a lot easier when we were cleaning just my armor." agree Tucker.
"Yeah, I know. That's I think because, you know, uh, you didn't do anything!"
"I'm sorry, what?" said Tucker sarcastically. "It's kind of hard to hear you over the sound of your constant team killing." Caboose began to laugh sarcastically and kind of creepy.
"Don't make me mad." he finally said after quitting the laughter. Hawk choose this time to walk and attempt to break the tension.
"Caboose you need help with your armor?" she asked helpfully.
"Yes!" said Caboose sound relieved.
"How did you get all that black stuff off your armor?" ask Tucker as Hawk started to scrape off the black stuff from Caboose's suit.
"You know this armor isn't glued to our skin, right?"
"Bow, Chicka, Bow, Wow."
"Oh, Shut up!"
Red Vs Blue
"As far as I'm concerned, I'm square with you." said Tex crossing her arms. They had finally got all the black stuff off of Caboose armor and where currently back with Tex and Church. Who were arguing.
"I saved you from a life of imprisonment. How the hell are squared with me?" asked Church angrily.
"Because I didn't kill you back at Sidewinder." Tex said simply.
"You know, I don't really see how not killing somebody is the same thing as doing them a favor."
"Well, if you don't appreciate it." said Tex her voice had a hint of danger. "I could just kill right now."
"Keep that favor!" Hawk coughed.
"No, you can't. I'm already dead, bitch!" yelled Church get mad. "I guess the jokes on you."
"Stop it!" yelled Caboose. We all turned to look at him shocked about the outburst. "Stop fighting! Can't you see that you're tearing us apart?"
"What?" asked Hawk totally lost.
"What about us!" yelled Caboose at Tex.
"What about you?" asked Tex frowning.
"We help you, too." said Caboose almost crying. "And what do we get?"
"Way to turn our armor black!" guessed Hawk
"Nothing!" yell Caboose.
"Well, yeah, but -" said Tex slowly.
"Yeah, but nothing'. He's got a point." snapped Church jumping on the chance that Caboose had given him.
"I did help them get the flag back." countered Tex.
"Yeah, but you were paid to do that." said Tucker hopping on the bandwagon. "We rescued you as a favor. We could have just let you rot in the Red Army prison."
"It wasn't much of a prison! It just the lower part of the base." mutter Hawk shifting her grip on the sniper rifle.
"How the hell do you know? Have you ever been there?" said Tucker turn on Hawk.
"No, but I see the lower part of our base."
"So?"
"So! Tucker it the same base just if different color scheme."
"Fine. I'll stay, now will you two, please! Shut up!" snapped Tex. We immediately quieted down wanting to keep our heads. "I'll stay here as long as it takes to help you guys win this thing. As soon as I have I'm out of here. "She then turn to face Tucker "What do you need me to do?"
"I have no idea." he said uncertain. "If you knew how to fix a tank, I would have you do that."
"OK." said Tex nodding.
"Wait." said Caboose excitedly. "You – you know how to fix Sheila?" he paused waiting for answer and when he didn't one he simply said. "I love you."
Red Vs Blue
It didn't take long to make it out to the turned over tank but been out in the open like this made Hawk nervous. She didn't like that fact that anyone could walk up behind her and ... well.
"OK, take it easy, guys. When I was over at the Red Base, I saw that they've already got their jeep fixed. So, whatever you do, don't let them see us before we get Sheila back online." said Church turning to face us.
"Like we have much control over that." mutter Hawk crossing her arms.
"OK, OK. Even if we get Sheila fixed, how are we going to turn her over?" asked Caboose. "I mean, it's not like as if we could just lift -" Caboose just turned around see that Tex had flipped the tank upright. "Oh. She is a very strong lady."
"I'm the one that's the least visible, so I'm going to head up here to higher ground." said Church. Hawk nodded in response, but Caboose move past her and up to Church.
"Wait! I'll come with you!" said Caboose obviously want to spend some time with his "best friends."
"That kind of defeats the purpose, Caboose." said Church exasperated.
"OK! What if I'm really, really quiet?" Caboose said his voice trailing off to a whisper.
"Do you even understand what the term "visibility" means?" Caboose began to fake laugh still trying to play it cool.
"Ah, good one, Church."
"Seriously, you don't know what it means, do you?"
"Ah, no."
"Caboose, just stay here, man, and try not swallow your tongue or anything like that." he said sighing and turning to look at Hawk. "Hawk, you're on Caboose duty!" Then he ran off to be look out.
"Just watch the Red Base and tell us if you see any movement." Tucker called after Church then he turn to talk to Tex.
"I'm so glad that I was promoted to babysitter." said Hawk sarcastically. she turned to look at Caboose and frowned.
"You're trying to swallow your tongue aren't you."
"Yeah, it harder than you might think!" he said innocently. Hawk broke out into a grin. Caboose was just so sweet and well ... dumb. Hawk pause with a realization hit her. She could trust Caboose! The word trust echo around in her head. How long had it been since she felt the likelihood of being stab in the back was pretty low?
"Hey, Tucker!" yelled Church look down from the canyon edge.
"What?"
"What the hell is my body still doing up here?"
"That's part of being dead. Church. Your body doesn't really move around much anymore." said Tucker missing the point. "Maybe you haven't fully grasped the concept yet."
"All right, well let me rephrase that, then." said Church getting more pissed. "Why in the hell haven't you buried my body yet?"
"Buried, with what? All we have are pistol and rifles." said Tucker yelling back. "What do you want me to do, shoot you a grave?"
"Well then, how about shipping me back home? You know, let the loved ones pay a little respect." snapped back Church.
"Well, Church, here's your girlfriend." said Tucker turning to face Tex. "Tex as one of Church's loved ones, would you like to pay your respects?" Tex didn't even give an answer turning back to work on the tank.
"That was a stirring eulogy." said Tucker sarcastically. "Rest in peace good buddy!"
"R.I.P.!" Hawk called up to Church smiling.
"R.I.P." said Caboose slowly. "Oh, Rise and Invade Pizza Hut."
"Yes, Caboose! That's what it means." said Hawk rolling her eyes.
Red vs Blue
Hawk looked up at the boys on the ledge and sighed. She had refused to go up with them saying the whole point of Church going up there was to keep a lookout and then going up would put them in danger. No One listened to her though. They all want to stand over Church's body and talk. Like a bunch of Jackasses. She frowned looking over at Tex who was finishing her work on the tank. Hawk frowned looking down at her sniper rifle then back at Tex. She wanted to say something but had no idea what to say. She felt a familiar ache in the side of her head and sighed. She removed her helmet and set on the tank beside her. She then processed to rub her left temple.
"That a nasty scar!" comment Tex looking over at her.
"Yeah, it is!" mutter Hawk her brow furring.
"How you get it?"
"I fell down a well as a kid!" Hawk said replace the helmet back on her head.
"Fell?"
"Yeah! I tripped into it!"
"It's pretty hard to fall down a well these days, let alone trip into one." Tex stared at her accusingly. Hawk was saved from answer when Church yelled out."
"Because when she gets the tank online she going to use it against the Reds, and they're all going to die." he yelled out for the world to hear. The stealth plan was going swimmingly.
"The Reds dying is a good thing." argue Tucker back loudly.
"No, Tucker, it's not a good thing." yelled Church. "As soon as we beat the Reds, Tex is outta here and I still haven't figured out a way to get AI out of her head."
"AI" came Caboose said slowly.
"Shut up, Caboose." snapped Church. "And if I don't get it out before she leaves-"
"If she leaves, you won't ever find her again." finish Tucker.
"Right." said Church.
"So What are you going to do? asked Tucker.
"I guess I'm going to do the only thing that I can do. I have to warn the Reds before she fixes the tank." Hawk let out a snort.
"You're switching sides?" asked Tucker.
"Sorry, guys." said Church apologetic. "I don't have much choice."
"Church, uh, what – what happens when the Reds come out here to stop Tex, and then they come also with guns and they find us?" ask Caboose rambling on, a little worried.
"I'll try to help you as best I can." said Church. "Good luck guys." I turned to look at Tex she looked at me back. Hawk could eat the tension in the air. Hawk quickly agreed with herself to leave Tex alone. She quickly placed her helmet over her head for safety.
"Well, you better get the tank work if you're going to fight the reds!" said Hawk slowly to avoid death. Tex nodded and leaned back over the tank; safe in the knowledge that Hawk wasn't going to stop her. Voices again drifted down the Canyon.
"They have girl, look pink armor!" yell Caboose.
"How come they get a girl?" complained Tucker.
"Uh, you guys realize that we are chicks, right?" Tex called up to them. "And we are standing right here?"
"Yeah, we know but we say a girl, we mean a girl-girl."
"And what the hell does that mean?" growled Tex.
"Nothing!" They both said backing up in fear. There was pause before Tex could start working on it Caboose interrupted us.
"Hey! Tex!" yelled Caboose. We turned around to look at him. "Uh, did you hear Church secret plan to tell the Reds that you were fixing the tank?" Hawk and Tex exchanged looks then went back to tank.
Red vs Blue
"Thank you for activating the M808V Main Battle Tank." said the Tank purring to life. Tex hopped into the driver chair started to fire shots at the Red Base. Hawk stood off to the side feeling unsafe about the tank since last time they meet it blew up Church. She could see the reds running around the base. Two of them hopped in the jeep and race toward them. Tex simply blew them up and they ran back inside the base. Suddenly the pink girl ran out onto the base and threw something light blue through the air. It soared through the air hit Tex's armor dead on.
"Ah, crap!" said Tex. Then she suddenly exploded blowing the tank up too. Hawk went soaring through the air hitting the canyon wall and getting knocked out.
"Please!" cried out Elizabeth grasping the side of the rocky wall of the well. She looked up blinking at the blinding light. Suddenly a shadowy figure came into view at the top.
"Help me!" cried out Elizabeth reaching out for the figure. Musical laughter filled the air and Elizabeth shudder.
"Maybe Later!"
"Come on, It freezing down here." Elizabeth her fingers reach up brushing the side of her head. Looking down at her hand to see it was covered in blood. She must have hit her head on the way down.
"Well you're not going to be much warmer up here, and it honestly your fault you fell down."
"You pushed me!"
"You shouldn't have stand so close to the edge."
"Sister! Please! I promised I won't tell Mom!"
"Well ... I'll let you up!" She sang. "IF you clean my side of the room from now on."
"Fine! Just let me up please." Elizabeth begged on the verge of tears. A small rope was dropped down the side and Elizabeth quickly grabbed on but was no uses. No matter how hard her sister tried she couldn't pull her up.
"Damn it, Your waterlogged!"
"What!?"
"I said you're goddamned waterlogged." screamed her sister. She could hear her stomping around at the top. Throwing a fit.
"Can you go get helped?" Elizabeth asked carefully as not to upset her sister any further.
"NO, I can't because then everyone will know I pushed you down this well. Then mom would... you know." said her sister screamed there was pause a when she spoke again it was calm and calculated. "No, I think it best if no one find you."
"Edelmira! You're my twin sister! You have to help me!" Elizabeth tried again trying to feed her sister's humane side.
"I have no idea, what you're talking about!" Edelmira said calmly her shadow disappearing from the well edge. "I don't have a twin sister! She died... in a well."
Season 1 Complete...
