A/N: This story might be a bit of a cliché now but I've had half of it sitting on my computer for years and I thought it was about time I finished it. This story is unbeta-ed and I haven't wrote anything in a long time so my writing skills may be a bit rusty, any constructive criticism is very welcome. Please enjoy =)
Animagus
By EllieLovesToRead
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters and places associated the book, that honor belongs to J.K. Rowling.
Lily couldn't sleep. She sighed and rolled over again, for what felt like the hundredth time that night, facing away from the gap in the curtains. She'd always had this problem; if there was any sort of light source within the room when she was attempting to sleep, she couldn't actually fall asleep, no matter how tired she was. The light source in question was not one she could just turn off. Through the gaps in the curtains shone the moonlight. It shone right onto Lily's face.
After several more attempts, Lily had had enough. She threw her covers off angrily and let out a forceful sigh as she got out of bed. She padded towards the window and pulled the curtains back fully. She suspected it was Marlene who'd left them open, she was always looking out of the window before she went to bed. Before closing them she took the time to enjoy the beautiful view. The moon was at its fullest, it was big and round in the sky, illuminating the grounds below. The moonlight glistened on the lake and cast shadows in the forest, making it look even more unwelcoming than usual. The Forbidden Forest had always seemed to fascinate Lily, although, she was never stupid enough to actually venture out there, unlike some people she knew.
Lily didn't know exactly how long she stood by the window but she knew that it had been a fairly long time. Just as she was about to climb back into her warm bed something caught her eye. At first, she dismissed it as her imagination but on closer inspection she saw movement. She strained her eyes and squinted to get a better look at what was out there. Marlene had once told her that she'd seen a dog roaming the grounds just by the edge of the forest. Lily knew that there were all sorts of creatures and animals inhabiting the treed area of the school grounds but she was pretty sure that dogs didn't live there. The longer she looked out of the window, however, the more the silhouetted figure looked like a dog. Lily, being a logical thinker, blamed what she was seeing on sleep deprivation. She sighed again and pulled the heavy red curtains shut. She was being ridiculous.
It wasn't until a little later that Lily registered the fact that the form she saw greatly resembled the Grim omen. Although Lily didn't have that much faith in divination, it still unnerved her and because of this she was yet again unable to sleep. She suppressed a frustrated growl as she got up and headed towards the window yet again. She knew it was unhealthy to dwell on death omens but she had to make sure that it wasn't the Grim, if only for her peace of mind. As she looked out of the window for the second time she saw two more figures out by the forest, the first definitely being a big, black, shaggy dog. Lily jumped back in surprise and then pressed her face closer to the glass and watched in interest as the dog and the other creature battled with a larger dog or perhaps a wolf.
She didn't exactly know what possessed her to do it, but as soon as she saw the poor dog being thrown a few metres by the larger one she scurried down the dormitory stairs, grabbing her dressing gown on the way. She fumbled with the tie as she exited through the portrait of the Fat Lady, not even pausing at the stairs. She knew it was silly: trying to rescue a defenseless dog from the jaws of another but she hated to see any creature in pain or a situation of helplessness. Her feet made slapping sounds as they hit the stone hallways and echoed. She prayed that the noise she was making didn't lure the caretaker to her location. Once she got to the end of the long corridor, the exit to the castle was in view. She hurried towards it and pushed hard against the heavy wooden doors.
The icy air hit her with a forced blast but that didn't slow her down. However, now that she was outside, Lily wished that she had brought some shoes with her. The stones, twigs and the uneven paths were hurting her feet. She pulled her dressing gown tighter around her body, she really should have brought her thick cloak out with her. Lily made her way through the darkness with only her wand light to guide the way. Hogwarts at night wasn't very inviting at all.
At first there was no sight of the two beasts but Lily could hear the faint padding of paws. She could hear the snarls and growls from within the trees. Lily took one look at the forest and her first instinct was to run back to the castle as fast as she could but curiosity stopped her. She hesitantly took a few steps into the forest, yet again cursing the fact that she was barefooted. The growls seemed a lot closer and louder now. Lily focused on slowing her breathing, she had to calm down otherwise she was sure she was going to hyperventilate. Her heart thudded in her chest as she caught a glimpse of the animals battling. She had underestimated the number of creatures there were; just in a clearing, there was not two but three animals fighting. The third was a stag. The other two were a dog and a wolf. No, not a wolf, a werewolf! Lily's breath sped up now and she could hear every beat of her heart as the blood pounded in her head. Lily couldn't help it, she screamed.
The high pitched screech pierced through the air and distracted the werewolf from the black dog it was tangling with. Lily's lapse in control could have been the death of her, the werewolf was heading directly for her.
"Oh, my God!" Lily breathed out before she started to run. The werewolf was faster, it swiped out at her with it's claws. Lily cried out, screwed her eyes shut and braced for the inevitable pain. When no pain came, Lily cautiously opened her eyes. She breathed out a breath of shock at the scene in front of her. The stag she saw earlier was laying at her feet, bleeding heavily, and the dog was back to its task of distracting the werewolf. Lily saw it running towards the Whomping Willow with the werewolf closely behind it. Lily's attention was drawn back to the quivering heap on the ground, it had four deep parallel scratches along its right side. She crouched down beside the once beautiful animal and let out a small sob. She knew she was being irrational but she felt a deep sadness settle within her at the animal's heroic actions. She had no way of helping it. She gently touched its fur with a trembling hand. Tears sprung to her eyes at the thought of its death. There was nothing she could do. Even if she took it to the castle, her professors wouldn't be able to do much for the poor creature, so instead she softly stroked its uninjured side in what she hoped was a comforting gesture.
"I'm sorry," she sobbed. "You saved my life. Thank you." She knew that the wounded animal couldn't understand her but she carried on mumbling to it anyway. It wasn't long, however, until she got to her feet. She didn't want to watch the stag die. That might have been selfish of her but she wouldn't have been able to bare it. "I'm sorry," she whispered in parting. The animal's eyes followed her and if stags could express complex emotion then Lily could have sworn that they held looks of pain, panic and finally understanding. The memory would haunt her dreams. She had to keep moving now, otherwise she would lose the strength to.
Once Lily was safe back in her dormitory, she curled up under her still-warm bed covers. She mustn't have been gone that long. She scolded herself for her rash behaviour. She could have been killed and almost was. She had to stifle sobs as she reflected back on the events that had taken place that night. She wrapped her covers around herself more securely as if they'd protect her from her memories. She couldn't stop the tears that leaked down onto her face even when she told herself she was being silly for crying over a stupid animal. She still hadn't closed the curtains and the moon still shone onto her face but somehow it didn't matter any more. She fell into a restless sleep that was haunted by an appearance from the three animals she'd seen in the forest.
Lily didn't feel as though she'd slept when she woke up. Her eyes were sticky with sleep and she felt very groggy but she got up on time, nonetheless. Her eyes were puffy and red from the crying she'd done the night before but there was nothing she could do about them now. She just hoped that nobody noticed. Knowing her luck, James Potter would notice and he probably wouldn't be quiet about it either but she was prepared to snap at her fellow Gryffindor if he brought up her physical appearance.
Lily slowly trudged down to the Great Hall and smiled in relief when she didn't see James or any of the Marauders. Maybe this day wasn't going to as bad as Lily thought. However, she was still on edge, ready to bump into someone that might have seen her last night. She wasn't allowed to be out of bed at that hour after all, although if someone had seen her, she reckoned that they'd have told her off by now. Breakfast was mostly uneventful. Even Lily's friends were quiet today. They thankfully hadn't mentioned her eyes either.
"It seems really quiet without the Marauders here, doesn't it?" Lily heard Marlene mumble to a Gryffindor a year below them.
"Yeah, well you can't expect them to turn up for breakfast after what happened to James and Remus," the girl replied. "You can't have one without the other three."
"What happened to James and Remus?" Lily spoke up. She was curious. She was willing to bet that they'd got into some sort of trouble. When had they not?
"You haven't heard?" the girl replied in a slightly shocked voice. "I thought everyone knew."
"Knew what, Mills?" Marlene asked impatiently.
"Well," the girl started but looked a little reluctant to answer.
"They've obviously got caught doing something they shouldn't have," Lily said sharply. She had absolutely no patience to deal with James and his gang's adventures today. "Why does it always have to be the gossip of the school? They should grow up."
"How can you be so heartless?" Mills said in a wounded tone. "They're in the hospital wing!"
"What?" Marlene asked, leaning forward as if it'd give her all of the details straight away. "What happened?"
"Well I don't really know exactly what happened," Mills admitted, "but I do know that there was a lot of blood." Blood. Why did she have to mention that word? Images of the stag in the woods last night resurfaced and suddenly Lily didn't feel particularly hungry any more.
"Are they okay?" Lily asked tentatively. They might be annoying but she definitely didn't want to see them hurt.
"Remus is just a little scratched up but apparently James is in a bad way," Mills replied tearfully. Even though the Marauders caused trouble and annoyed many people, they were still loved by their house. Mills was obviously one of those people, Lily idly speculated whilst her imagination ran wild. What could the four of them have got up to to end up so injured?
"Maybe we should go and see them after we're finished here?" Marlene suggested.
"Yeah, okay," Lily replied absently. She'd go even if it was only to satisfy her curiosity. Despite her early complaints, she had grown to like James and his friends over the last year. She might not agree on some of the things they did but ever since falling out with Severus she'd got to know them a bit better and truthfully, they were decent people, if not a little mischievous.
After breakfast, Lily found herself following Marlene to the hospital wing. She felt a little reluctant to just walk in and visit James and Remus. She felt as though she didn't know them well enough to turn up unannounced expecting to be welcomed in with open arms. She was on better terms with Remus but even then they weren't that close.
"Come on Lily!" Marlene urged. "It'll be fine."
"I don't know if this is such a good idea," Lily replied.
"Well, we're here now, we might as well go in."
Lily took a few hesitant steps inside the hospital wing. She hated this place. She hadn't had the misfortune to end up in here that often herself but she'd visited many of her friends in here. She spotted Sirius Black almost straight away. He sat attentively in between his two friends' hospital beds. Remus was awake and sitting up but James was fast asleep on his left side facing away from his friends.
"Hey," Marlene said in a hushed tone. Sirius glanced up blearily, he looked as though he hadn't had any sleep at all that night. His clothes were all dishevelled and his hair didn't fair any better.
"Hey," he replied, his voice was gravelly and weak as if it was the first time he'd spoken in quite some time. Lily was about to say something before Sirius' narrowed gaze stopped her. He looked angry at her for some reason and Lily couldn't think why. "What are you doing here?"
"I- uh," Lily started but looked towards the ground when she couldn't come up with a suitable reply.
"Lay off her, Sirius," Remus scolded his friend. He looked even more tired than Sirius. His eyes were very bloodshot and dark circles had gathered under them. He had a weary but also guilty look about him. Why would Remus look guilty? Lily thought to herself.
"What happened?" Marlene asked after a moment of silence.
"I don't think that's any of your business," Sirius snapped. Marlene was taken aback by Sirius's sharp tone. He'd never spoke that way to her before. She was one of the people who got famously along with the gang of misfits.
"Where's Peter?" Lily asked in attempt to clear away the awkwardness that had descended and to hopefully distract her friend.
"He got sent back to the dormitory," Remus said. "They tried to send Sirius back too but he wouldn't leave."
"Like I could leave," Sirius said in a bitter tone but it was aimed more at himself than the room's occupants this time.
"Is he going to be alright?" Lily asked whilst observing James. He looked a lot younger with his glasses removed. His face was drained of its usual colour and it seemed as though he was in competition with Nearly Headless Nick on who could look the palest.
"How did this happen?" Marlene repeated dumbfoundedly. Sirius shot her a dirty look but remained quiet.
"It was stupid," Remus said with a lot of remorse. "It should have never happened, I should have-" Remus looked down at the bed sheets covering his legs in an effort to hide his tear-filled eyes.
"Come on, we all know you're not to blame," Sirius said. He patted his conscious friend's arm in a comforting gesture. "You know that once we'd made our minds up there was no changing it."
"I still should have tried harder," Remus continued in a strained voice.
"Don't blame yourself!" Sirius responded forcefully. "You and I both know full well who's to blame!"
"That's not fair, she didn't know," Remus said, whilst discreetly glancing in Lily's direction.
"What are you talking about?" Lily asked in a small voice.
"You make it sound like it's Lily's fault," Marlene spoke up and, at Sirius's fierce expression, added, "it isn't, is it?" Lily shot Remus a questioning look. Their conversation had headed in a direction nobody had expected.
"No, no of course it wasn't your fault," Remus reassured Lily almost too quickly. "How could it have been?" Remus's words repeated themselves over and over in Lily's head. She was missing something, she was sure of it. She had a nagging feeling in the back of her mind and it wouldn't leave her alone.
"Come on, Lily," Marlene said after looking at her watch, "Breakfast time is over, it's time we headed to our first class."
"Okay," Lily replied distantly she was too distracted by her thoughts to pay much attention to her friend. She glanced at James one last time before she left to hospital wing with Marlene.
The girls were halfway to their first lesson when Lily suddenly stopped short in the middle of the corridor, causing Marlene to walk straight into her.
"Merlin's beard, Lily! You can't stop like that with no warning! We both could have been-" Marlene fell silent at the horrified look on her friend's face. "What? What is it?"
"I have to go!" she shouted over her shoulder as she bolted back towards the hospital wing. It had finally clicked, she'd finally realised what she was missing. James had bandages around his torso and he was laying on his left side. There were three animals out in the Forbidden Forest. The stag was injured on his right side. Was James an animagus? Was this actually all Lily's fault after all?
When she reached the doors of the hospital wing, Lily all of a sudden felt insecure. How on earth was she going to go about this? She couldn't just blurt the question out. What if she was wrong? She'd feel really stupid if this was her just jumping to conclusions. She took a deep breath to calm her nerves and walked back into the hospital wing. She spotted Remus and Sirius having a quiet conversation and made a beeline for them.
"It was my fault, wasn't it?" Lily said and the two boys looked up at her in alarm. "I think I've finally figured it out." The alarm immediately turned to full blown panic.
"Lily-" Remus started.
"You don't know what you're saying," Sirius interrupted.
"What I think Sirius is trying to say-" Remus attempted to speak again.
"You're jumping to conclusions," Sirius butted in again.
"If course it's not your fau-"
"You're delusional," Sirius added. This must have been the most animated that Lily had seen Sirius all day but his denial had only reinforced Lily's theory. A theory she hadn't even shared with the two Marauders yet but one they were still trying to deny. Unregistered animagus were illegal, Lily thought to herself, of course they'll try and deny it.
"Sirius, she already knows, maybe we should-"
"Stop making accusations," Sirius kept up his stream of contradictions.
"I know, okay?" Lily finally spoke up. "There's no point in denying it. I know."
"Aw, Merlin's beard," Sirius muttered in dismay.
"I suppose the secret's out," Remus said in an even tone. "So what now?"
"Oh..." Lily said quietly. She hadn't even thought about what she'd do with the information she'd figured out. Unregistered animagus were illegal, she reminded herself. She could end up getting these boys expelled or thrown in Azkaban.
There was one important detail that had escaped her mind until now: there weren't three animagi out there in the Forbidden Forest, there were two...and a werewolf!
Something must have given away her train of thought as Remus quietly said, "Yeah, hard to believe, huh?"
"Oh my god!" Lily blurted out, "OH MY GOD! You could have killed me, you nearly killed James!"
"Hey, that's not fair!" Sirius jumped up out of his chair, "Had you not been in the forest last night none of this would have happened!"
"No one is to blame but me," Remus said.
"No! No, we've been doing this for years and we haven't had a single incident, it's not your fault, Moony."
"Moony?" Lily asked curiously. "Merlin's beard, how could I have missed that?!" Sirius turned around and kicked the leg of his recently vacated chair. It skidded across the floor with a harsh scrape.
"Get out!" Sirius shouted and clenched his fist but Lily didn't move.
"I'm guessing you're the dog?" She questioned in a calm calculating voice. "The only reason I went out last night is because I saw you getting attacked!"
"I was doing just fine until you came along!" Sirius retorted, "In fact we all were, you should shut up about things you don't understand!"
"You... should all... shut up," a weak but distinctively annoyed voice said. "Some.. of.. us are... trying... to sleep."
"James!" Remus exclaimed happily. "How are you?"
"Nice to hear your voice, man," Sirius said, equally as happy. With the argument forgotten for now, Lily remained silent, too busy watching the exchange between the three friends.
"What are... you arguing... about?" James asked whilst attempting to sit up. He didn't get very far before he hissed in pain. Sirius immediately rushed to his friend's side and pushed him back down.
"Hey, relax Prongs," Sirius said gently, "You've got a couple of slices in your side, mate. Madam Pomfrey couldn't heal them by magic." He passed James his glasses before sitting down again.
"That's better," James said. "Oh, hi Lily." He attempted to smile at her but it didn't quite reach his eyes.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" Lily asked soothingly.
"Been better," he replied with a grin. "So what... were you... guys fighting...about?"
"Here," Sirius said whilst handing James a glass of water.
"Help...me up?" James asked. Lily went to James side and helped him sit up before Sirius could. James gratefully accepted the water once he was sitting upright. "You keep avoiding my question."
"She knows," Remus finally answered for the group. "Lily figured out what happened last night." James drew in a sharp breath and looked at Lily, what little colour his face has gained was lost in an instant. The hand that held the glass of water had slowly began to shake and James had seemed to have shrunk in on himself. Lily didn't think she'd even see the day that James Potter was scared.
"It's okay," Lily said reassuringly. "I won't tell anyone."
"Why?" Sirius was looking at her suspiciously, like he couldn't figure out if she had an ulterior motive. "What's in it for you? A while back you'd want nothing better than for us to be expelled."
"James saved my life," Lily stated. "It would be a poor way to repay him by getting you all expelled."
"Thank you!" James uttered in relief and this time, he gave a real smile.
Madam Pomfrey chose this moment to interrupt them as she stepped out of her office.
"What is all this racket about? James needs to rest!" She scolded and group and on spotting Lily she added, "Shouldn't you be in class, Miss Evans?" Lily replied with a sheepish grin and glanced back at the boys before leaving the hospital wing.
When everything had calmed down and James had recovered some more, Lily made another trip down to the hospital wing. She passed Peter on the way in and spared him a brief greeting before heading towards the rest of the Marauders.
"Hey," Lily said. "So, if anyone asks, I left my transfiguration books in here earlier and I had to come back for them." At the other's curious glances, she added, "I may have freaked Marlene out earlier when I ran out on her."
"Okay, fair enough," James laughed. "I guess no one would question that coming from you."
Lily's attention was drawn to Remus who was dressed in his school robes.
"They're discharging you then?" She asked.
"Yeah, there wasn't really anything wrong with me to begin with," he smiled and added, "a precaution, you know?"
"So...what now?" Sirius said. "Everything's changed hasn't it?"
"Not really, Padfoot," James said, "This changes nothing, right Lily?"
"Right." The two shared a secret smile before turning back to their friends.
The rest of the evening was spent swapping funny stories and school gossip. Lily may have not liked or agreed with the Marauder's actions before today but she'd got a better understanding of them and their friendship in one night and honestly, Lily could say that she actually liked the boys. This could be the start of some amazing friendships.
