A/N: So this will be the THIRD Jolie fic posted within 24 hours. I'm putting a challenge out there for more stories to be posted this week. If it's your hundredth fic or your first it doesn't matter-JUST POST IT. The more the merrier. Until next time-ya'll are the best-PCGirl.
Disclaimer: All characters are property of ABC/Disney, I'm just borrowing them for my own entertainment.
Jessica pulled into the parking lot and looked over at her sister—it had been a long four and a half months, the road had been tough but she thought this was the end. Or at least prayed it was and this wouldn't be a monstrous setback. "Hey, you still with me?" she asked nervously.
Natalie laughed at the wording, "Yes, Jess-it's still me." Five months ago she would have never thought she would be like her sister and mom and have a split personality—thought she was strong enough that it could never happen to her. With everything she had gone through in her life she didn't think it was a simple picture of John kissing another woman that would be her downfall. "Are you sure we should do this?"
Jessica hid the fact that she'd been wondering the same thing most of the drive to Port Charles, "We've drove all this way. It's a little late to back out now—isn't it?"
"I—what if he's moved on? What if he opens that door and there's another woman in there? And they weren't just talking," she said and then slanted her eyes at her sister.
"Then dad has been right all along and he's nothing but a womanizing man slut," she laughed, remembering her dad using those exact words the day Natalie saw the picture.
"And if she comes back?"
"I'm here and I'll fight her. How many times have you fought Tess for me? It's time I returned the favor," she said as she stepped out of the car and watched as Natalie stayed seated. Walking over to the passenger door she opened it and put out her hand, "Don't let her win, Natalie—never let her win."
"What if he uses this against me? What if he uses this to say I'm not fit to take care of Liam?" she asked as they walked up the stairs and down the hall until they came to the room number that Starr had given them.
"The John McBain I know wouldn't do that," said Jessica as she knocked loudly on the door and then walked to the far end of the hallway, nodding to Natalie that she would be here still when it was all said and done.
It took a minute for him to answer the door and Natalie contemplated walking away when she finally heard the click of the lock and then a pause before the door opened. "Hi," she said quietly as she forced herself to make eye contact with him—this was probably the hardest part of the whole situation, telling him what she went through.
"Hey," he said as he took her in—she looked uneasy at being here and he wondered if it was him. "What are you doing here?"
"I came here to talk—tell you everything. Can I come in?" she asked and watched as he thought about it for a moment before letting her into the room.
"How is Liam doing?" he asked as he closed the door. In the beginning he'd dream she would come to his door and they would make up. But that dream had slowly vanished along with everything else from the world he'd known for nine years.
"He's fine—he misses you."
"He wouldn't have if you had let me talk to you—instead of throwing that damn restraining order in my face. Is it still in place? Are cops about to come and break down the door for me being within two hundred yards of you?"
"No, it's over now," she said, remembering how she'd talked her dad into dropping it, telling him the worst was over and wondering if it really was or if telling John this late in the game was going to start something else up.
"I know you Natalie—there's something else, isn't there?"
Natalie sat down on the bed and could feel all the doubts she had about telling him. Covering her face with her hands she took a deep breath and counted back from five before looking at John, "I never meant to drag this out so long. I went to London to relax for a few days. While there I had a few black outs of my memory—figured it was just stress and didn't tell anyone.
"The first night we were back in Llanview I stayed at Llanfair. Jess came to check on me and I was gone. When she called my cell I didn't answer. She thought I'd come here to talk to you—that we worked it out so she wasn't that worried. Please know Liam has never been in any danger."
The words she used plus the tears he watched form in her blue eyes made his stomach churn—this wasn't his normal Natalie, he could see that now, "You never came here. Where were you?"
"Jess asked me the same question when I came down for breakfast the next day. I told her I didn't know what she was talking about—and we realized what was going on. She went to call the doctor and I knocked her out cold. Well, I didn't—Tricia did."
"Tricia?"
"My alter. Apparently the stress of everything over the past few years was finally too much to take."
"But the signature on the restraining order was yours."
"Tricia went to my dad and made a very compelling argument—said I had talked to you and you had threatened to kill me and Liam if we didn't get back together. He drew it up and she signed my name."
"Your dad really thinks that little of me? That I would ever threaten your life—and my child's life?"
"In the heat of the moment all he wanted to do was protect his family—you should understand that. Plus he was pretty pissed at you for cheating on me. By the time Jessica woke up the restraining order was signed and Tricia was gone."
"They should have called me—I could have found you faster. That's my job, Natalie—finding people who don't want to be found."
Natalie nodded in agreement, but didn't say anything "It took nearly two months to find me—Tricia—however you want to put it."
"Did she write the letter I got?"
"No, I did," she said regretfully. "I didn't want you to see me at my worst. At that point I was at St Anne's and it was a hell of a battle to maintain control. I just wanted to wait until I knew when I was fully integrated before telling you what happened."
"You didn't trust me enough to tell me? What—you thought I'd use that against you to gain custody of Liam?"
"The thought crossed my mind. Actually it did just now before Jess knocked on the door—I wouldn't blame you before if you had, but I'm better now John and I'm in full control again.
"I came here tonight to tell you that and let you know the restraining order is gone. I'd be lying if I said Liam didn't need his dad in his life."
"What about his mom's life?" he said quietly as he kneeled down in front of her. She was so strong—the strongest person he knew so for her to finally break and to know he was at the center of it all hurt worse than the past few months of everything else.
"I want to be there for it all, Natalie. And that's the bad too—can you forgive me for all the hurt I've caused you these past few months? For a damn kiss that meant nothing?"
"John," she sighed. "I'm strong—you know that—and now, after this, I'm stronger than ever. I don't need you coming back in my life because you feel like I need protecting. I'm not made out of glass—I don't break easily."
"You're right," he said as he pushed her hair back out of her face. "You aren't made out of glass—you are made out of damn stone—it's one of the things I love about you. But I don't want to come back in your life to protect you-"
"See—I knew it," she said as she jumped up and went towards the door. "You have a life here now—I'll, I'll call you and we can figure out parenting arrangements later."
"Damn it, Natalie. Let me finish," he said as he jumped over and slammed his hand against the door before she could open it. "I want back in your life because it's my life. There is nothing here for me, Natalie—everything is back home in Llanview. And I want it all back—my whole life."
John watched her gulp and could see emotion in her eyes and knew he was so close, "Will you give that to me? Can I have my life back?"
Natalie stood there watching him—here was silent, brooding, John McBain being not that at all. Putting his whole heart out there to be crushed if she wanted to do it. "John, I—I don't know what the future holds. I don't know if I can simply say I forgive you right now, but you can come back to Llanview. And we can see where it goes from there. Is that enough?"
"I guess it'll have to be," he said as he leaned in very close to her and took in a scent that was only Natalie before he turned and started packing. It may be enough for now, but he knew it wouldn't be enough for long so he would do everything possible to reunite his whole life again.
