I'm My Great-Grandsire

I'm My Great-Grandsire

By Jonquil

(To the tune of "I'm My Own Grandpa".)

It sounds twisted, quite true,
It could happen to you,
I'm my great-grandsire.

I'm my sire's sire's sire.
(We mostly just say 'sire'.)
It sounds twisted, quite true,
And so what else is new?
I'm my great-grandsire.

Now, many, many years ago, (or so my elders say),
A princess fair met an Irish oaf and stole him from the day.
She carried him off, he carried on, they carried the demon stamp,
And then they carried out their plan, and poof! I was a vamp.

My Sires were most neglectful, and they laughed my thoughts to shame,
So I set out to find a knight, and found him, fish aflame.
I made him what he is today, and how did he requite?
He allied with the nasty Slayer, abandoning my fight.

Then I ran off to old Brazil (a girl must have her fun),
And thought about the men I'd lost, and thought about the sun,
And thought about the Fisher King, and thought a few things more,
And then an evil law firm sent a strange ambassador.

So I packed up my crimson best, and, travelling after dark,
I made my way to far LA. I learned the vital spark
Was reinfused into the dust my grandsire'd left behind,
Restored to life, not undeath! She was part of humankind.

A girl must have her fun, I say, and I was running low.
My Childe gone south, my Sire gone good, and now the final blow!
But (with some help from W&H) I came and set things right.
I Sired my straying grandmother, and brought her back to night.

So I'm my sire's sire's sire,
Yes, I'm my great-grandsire.
You may say it's impure,
But we'll make Springer for sure,
I'm my great-grandsire.