Hear Me
By: Ryu Katanna
Beta:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Chapter One
A slight breeze rustled the leaves of the Goshinboku over Kagome Higurashi's head as the sun had started to rise casting the first light of day into the darkness. Shadows played over her red hakama from the large boughs. Long black locks fell over her thin shoulders to pool in waves onto the ground before the sacred tree where she was seated. Her white chihaya rose as fell almost unseen with her steady and shallow breaths.
All this went unnoticed by the young woman as pen scratched rapidly across paper. A pouted lower lip pressed between white teeth until she flinched at the pain and stopped in her writing as if startled by the sting from the pressure. A small sigh escaped her before she leaned back against the massive trunk of the tree and look up to see the light play over the ground where she stretched out her long slender legs. No sound escaped her as she placed the notebook beside her. She had no wish to look back at what had been written because she knew all too well the words. The melody of the lyrics played in her mind and Kagome frowned unhappily as she raised her hand to trace the scars along her throat.
It had been a year since she had gotten them and the others on her soft skin. A year since she had come back home for good, and spent almost a month in the hospital due to her injuries. Three years she had spent tracking down the shards of the Shikon No Tama. In that time she had made both friends and enemies, and she'd had adventures that no one would ever believe where real. The things she had seen and the things she had done we're now only a part of legend. A fantastical story. The part of her life that no one outside of her family would ever believe had truly happened to her, and that was only because they had been there on this side of the well to witness the effects.
Slowly her hand lowered from the scars on her neck to rest her hand over the Shikon No Tama that was hidden just under the white collar of her chihaya. All that trouble, and all those lives lost, because of such a small thing. Even now she could feel the power from from the accursed gem. In the last year the power of the jewel had still called out to the dark places that were in people's hearts. Many would find themselves on the shrine's grounds, and not know why or how they did come to be there. Driven almost instinctively toward its power. It was said that a truly selfless wish could completely purify the jewel, but was there even such a thing?
Time and time again this question had played through her mind. Not once in all that time had she been able to think of an unselfish wish. For that is what wishes were. To wish meant to desire something; to want. Wants, desires, and hopes all came from the same place. Even to wish for something for someone else was not completely selfless because internally the person making the wish would be receiving something in return. Even if that something was only knowing that they had done something nice for someone else.
After all this time thinking on the subject Kagome had come to the conclusion that there was no such thing as a truly selfless wish. Therefore there was no way to completely rid the world of the jewels existence, and so she was stuck with the responsibility of it's protection. Maybe someday the right wish would come, but until then she would try to keep its continued existence hidden.
The sound of the morning birds turned her attention away from her internal thoughts on the past. To go too far down that path would only lead to heartache again, and thoughts that she did not want to have. Those memories could stay buried where they were just under the surface. It was the best place for them, but the fact that those things had happened would continue to haunt her. Although she knew that her behavior since her almost death worried her family greatly.
Her mother worried as Kagome had been training extensively since her return. Training herself as a miko consumed her days, and nightmares plagued her nights. She slept very little as it was. Always going to bed after everyone was well asleep, and then up again outside before the sun rose. Kimiko Higurashi had tried to get her daughter to slow down. Tried to convince her to seek help after what had happened, but she was refused every time. The stronger a miko she became meant better protection with the Shikon.
Her grandfather fretted over this as well. As happy as he was for his eldest grandchild to start taking her training and shrine duties seriously; he also knew there was only so much she would be able to do now. The scarring on her throat had made her unable to speak, and therefore unable to carry out all the duties and responsibilities to take over the shrine. She would not be able to greet any guests, tell the stories and history of the shrine, or to chant the sutras. It was because of this that Souta was expected to inherit the responsibility.
Souta looked up to his older sister, and had admired her. He still did, but she had changed so much since her travels had ended that he was sometime unsure of how to connect with her. He was still young, but now had to start his own training to take over where she could not. Every day he watched her as she trained and tended the shrine grounds. He had become a presence at her side as he learned from her what he could, and then the rest from their grandfather. His own spiritual power had been unlocked with the help of his sister, and it was only a matter of time before he could do the same cleansing of the grounds she did.
Kagome shifted and then settled as her body relaxed into meditation. This was something she did every morning after the sun had just risen. A pink glow came to her skin and pulsed outward from her into the air and ground. The grass shone a healthy green, and the air around the shrine was crisp and clear of any of the pollution from the world around it. The leaves of the Goshinboku seemed to dance happily as any impurities around in the area were cleansed from the grounds and air.
She sat like this for several hours; taking only a little notice as another presence settled themselves next to her. She knew it was only Souta now joining her in morning meditation as he had taken to doing for half a year now. His light blue aura joining her own pink. The air soon warmed from the sun and as the slight chill fully faded two sets of eyes opened.
'He's getting better every day. Soon there will be no need for me here.' Kagome thought as she gently ruffled her little brothers hair.
"Let's get breakfast, Kagome. Mom is probably waiting for us by now." Souta said with a smile as he stood and held out his hand to help her up.
Nodding her agreement Kagome grasped her notebook in one hand and the young teens hand with the other. After she was standing she watched as Souta turned to walk toward the house while she turned back to the sacred tree. Resting her hand on the bark for only a moment her eyes misted at the feeling of comfort the tree sent back to her. Soon enough she turned to follow with silent footsteps into the house.
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It was after noon when she felt it. Tending to the gardens of the shrine as she did every day after lunch the sensation slid across her skin. Someone with the training of a monk as well as another had just entered the shrine grounds. One whose aura was darker, but strangely familiar. She could feel something inside her calling her to greet these people.
Making her way away from the gardens in back of the shrine Kagome brushed the dirt gently away from her hands. Her slow and measured steps brought her to them soon enough, and it was then she stopped with a look of surprise. A feeling of kindredship welled in her chest as honeyed brown eyes met the detached light brown of a man that was vaguely familiar to her. The other young man looked just like his older brother except for his black hair and eyes. It had been years since she had seen either one of these men.
-Eiri! Tatsuha!- Her mouth moved as if the call out to them, but no sound was uttered as her pace picked up and her face lit in surprise.
Soon enough she came to a stop in front of them where they had waited for her after seeing her coming. A long moment passed as they took in the changes ten years had brought. The last time she had seen either of them was at her father's funeral. She had only been nine then, and Tetsuha six while Eiri was a little older at twelve.
What many people didn't know or realize was that many of the families who had run shrines and temples in Japan had been intermarrying for generations. As it was Tetsuha and Eiri as well as their older sister Mika were the grandchildren of her grandfather's sister. She had played with them when they were younger at times when the families would get together for one reason or another.
-How are you?- A flush came to her cheeks as she tried to speak before remembering that they would not hear her.
"Kagome." Eiri's voice was deep as his light brown eyes watched her and Tatsuha smiled at her softly.
"It's okay. You don't have to be embarrassed. We heard from dad." Tatsuha said as if the scars on her throat, and the reason for her silence, wasn't obvious.
Kagome responded with a questioning look before Eiri spoke.
"Let's go inside. We can talk with your mother then." He left no room for argument as he walked toward the house only to turn back to look at them a few minutes later and make sure they were following.
After they had all entered the house and greetings were exchanged Kagome picked up one of the notebooks that were laying with a pen around the house. Writing was the only way in which her words could be conveyed into a conversation now. As much as she had tried to let her family know what she meant without it, in the last year, writing had been the only way for them to understand her. Only Souta had been accepting of her need to be understood without writing or sign language. She loved him all the more for it. Kagome had never felt more alone than in this last year.
She sat down across from Eiri and Tatsuha. Next to her was her mother who was looking a little sad while Souta placed himself on the other side of her. Souta watched the two curiously. He didn't really know them as he had only been a toddler the last time their families had gotten together. They were quickly introduced as Kagome place the tea pot onto the table.
"How are you boys doing these days?" Kimiko asked politely after the tea had been served.
"I'm good. Keeping busy with my training, and duties at the temple." Tatsuha replied with a small smile as Eiri shifted next to him.
"What about you Eiri?" Her mother prompted when the man didn't say anything.
"He's been kept busy between his writing and his lover." Tatsuha replied for him with a small chuckle at the thought only to pause as the rapid scratching of pen on paper filled the silence.
(You've just had a new book printed didn't you? I haven't gotten to read it yet, but Cool was wonderful. I'm looking forward to your new one when I have the time.) Kagome held up the notepad and watched as Eiri nodded in thanks for the compliment.
When silence fell between them Kagome looked between the brothers and her mother in question. It was odd that they would come today, and her mother seemed to know that they would be here. Her sad and slightly guilty face had her wondering what was going on until Eiri finally spoke for the first time since he had said her name. Kagome's eyes widened and she looked back to her mother at his words.
"No one has told her why we came here?" Eiri's very was cold and incredulous as he shot Kimiko a sharp look from under blond hair.
"Mom? What does he mean by that?" Souta asked for her when he could see his sister's confusion.
Kimiko sighed heavily as she looked back at her children. One still young and learning to take on a responsibility that had been meant for his older sister. The other older, and scarred in ways none of them could understand. It had taken months for her daughter to get back on her feet. She wasn't back to her old self and she never would be. Kimiko understood that, but she still wouldn't tell anyone what had happened the day that Souta had come running from the well house in terror. They had almost lost her twice on the way to the hospital, and she had spent a month in a coma.
Kimiko was at a loss as to how to help her. Her daughter couldn't speak. She had tried to convince her to learn sign language many times, but Kagome would always turn away. She was withdrawn and the avenues of communication were cut off with the exception of her notebook. Kimiko worried how she would live her life. Souta would ultimately be the one to take over the shrine. One day he would get married; have children. She wanted the same for her daughter, but knew with the way things were now that it may never happen for her.
She needed a change.
"Your grandfather and I have decided that you need some time to figure out what you want to do with your life. It's become clear to us that maybe here at the shrine isn't the best place for you to do so." Kimiko's eyes were misted, but her voice was strong and steady.
Hurt and the stabbing sense of betrayal flooded her. Kagome looked at her mother as her hand moved quickly across the paper.
(You're sending me away?!) The lines were shaky and not as neatly written as they had been before.
"We feel that it's best for you-" Kimiko didn't get to finish as Kagome launched up from her seat and ran up the stair to her room.
Kimiko sighed heavily as she watched her daughter leave the room. A crash came from upstairs a moment later, and she flinched at the sound. She turned back to see Tatsuha looking uncomfortable while Eiri gave her a hard stare. Souta, on the other hand, picked up the notepad from the floor where it had fallen before turning to look at his mother.
"I hope you and grandpa know what you're doing." The young teen's voice was upset as he turned away and tossed the notepad onto the table before the door slammed as he made his way outside.
The room was filled with a heavy silence for several minutes before Kimiko let out a small breath and looked back to the two in front of her. This was not how she had seen this visit going, and now everything had been turned on it's ear. Eiri continued to look toward the stairs where Kagome had gone. They had been close when they were children, and Kimiko didn't doubt that he was still taking in the changes in her daughter.
What Kimiko didn't know was that Eiri wasn't really thinking about that. He was lost in the memories of when they were children, and what had happened shortly after the last time he had seen her. When he had gone to America. His father had made a point to have Tatsuha tell him everything he had been told about what he had been told from his uncle. Eiri could see a lot of himself from just a year ago in his cousin right now. The way he was before he had met Shuichi.
"I'm sorry. Things haven't been the same around here since before Kagome was in the hospital. Since then she's almost like a different person. I don't know how to talk to her anymore, and she refuses to tell us anything about what happened to her. She trains as a miko of the shrine from before dawn until we're all in bed. If she's not training then she's tending to things around the shrine." Kimiko took a drink from her tea before continuing.
"She refuses any help from anyone. Her voice box was damaged from when she was attacked, but even though she can not speak she won't take sign language, and rarely writes to communicate either. I'm afraid she's limiting herself. At this rate how will she find employment? How will she make a living? Her grandfather and I are at a loss, and so he called your father for help."
Her shoulders sagged wearily, and both Eiri and Tatsuha could see the truth. What had happened was taking it's toll on everyone here.
"What exactly happened that you do know?" Tatsuha asked wanting to hear it from her as what their father had told them wasn't much at all.
"Kagome spent a lot of her time away from home. She traveled with some friends for a while. We didn't even know she had come home when she did. Souta found her covered in blood. We called the ambulance right away when he came into the house to get us. He looked terrified. We almost lost her twice on the way to the hospital. She spent a month in a coma as she healed. When she finally woke up she was different. She wouldn't tell anyone what had happened so we really don't know how she got so injured. I don't know what to do to help her. I'm hoping that some time away from everything will help to heal whatever hurt she's still carrying…"
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A little over half an hour had passed since Kagome had come to her bedroom to get away from her mother, but she didn't notice that passage of time. She was lost in memories and emotions she had thought to have buried. Her eyes squeezed shut and her body shuddered and she sat curled in a ball in the corner of her bed. Her own mother was sending her away. She didn't want her just like he hadn't wanted her.
'Why does this always happen?' Kagome thought as golden eyes and silver hair flashed across her mind's eye.
She was brought out of her memory when a sharp knock sounded from her door. Still she did not raise her head or respond in any way as the hinge creaked almost silently. Kagome could tell who it was from their aura before even looking up. He didn't move from his spot as he leant against the door frame.
She could feel him watching her as her body started to calm its trembling with his steady presence. He stood there in silence for several moments as he allowed her to calm down. No one had been able to sooth her so easily since she had come home for good. He had known her as a child, and so he was familiar, but he had not been around her during those years. He wasn't someone who was judging her every move as they tried to find anything wrong with how she was acting. Taking a deep cleansing breath
Kagome looked up at her cousin.
-Eiri.- His name was silent, but he seemed to understand as he nodded slightly before looking at the mess she had made in her room after she had come up here.
The floor was littered with shards from the mirror. Eiri made his way around the broken fragments and to her bed where he sat before taking her right hand in his own. She had not noticed the blood that coated her knuckles. Some of the shards were still imbedded in her hand, but she had not registered the pain.
"You didn't even notice, did you?" His voice was deep but gentle as he started to clean away the blood after grabbing the first aid kit that was always near her bed now.
Kagome only shook her head as she watched him pull out the few shards in her skin with deft fingers. Once it was cleared of blood and bandaged Eiri released her. They sat there in silence for a moment before Kagome looked up at him questioningly. Why had he come after her?
"The old man told your mother he would help you. You can go back to the temple. Honestly I don't think it will help. The temple isn't that much different from your shrine." Eiri said as he stood and shook a cigarette out of his pack.
Kagome stood up quickly to close the door before her mother or grandfather could walk by her room and see him smoking in the house. She shook her head at the look he sent her before pointing at his lip where the cigarette rested before motioning him to wait. Then she made her way over to her window and pulled it wide open. With a quick movement she was out the window and on the roof. He followed her only to see her reach up and pull her own pack from a hidden section of the roof.
"Kimiko doesn't know I take it." Eiri's voice was amused as she got comfortable.
Kagome shook her head to answer him before holding her hand up to her side.
"Only your brother?" Eiri asked just to confirm that he understood her.
With a nod Kagome settled next to him as she lit her own before handing him her lighter. Looking around even Eiri had to admit that this was a good spot. They were hidden from anyone on the ground by the tree, but the view of the woods behind the shrine was clear for them to see where they were. A comfortable silence fell before Eiri spoke again.
"I have a spare room at my place. You're welcome to it." He said only to see the surprise cross her face.
-Don't you have a lover? I don't want to intrude…- Her mouth moved silently as she looked back at him hoping he would understand what she was trying to say.
There was nothing for her to write with out here, after all.
"My lover? He lives with me too. As long as you can put up with him then I don't see the problem." Eiri's voice was casual as if stating fact.
Kagome looked confused as she tried to make sense of what he was offering. Here he was offering her to move into his house with the both of them. All without even speaking to his lover first. With this really be okay? She'd really didn't want to be the cause of problems between the two of them.
-Shouldn't you call your lover first?- She asked and she made a phone sign with her fingers and a questioning look.
Eiri only took a moment to figure out what she was trying to say. He didn't know what a problem her family was having with communicating with her. He could understand her just fine without the help of pen and paper. Yes, it took a little longer, but if this was the way she was the most comfortable then he wouldn't push the issue.
He shook his head a bit as he looked back at her before pulling his phone out of his pocket. He sent a short text to Shuichi telling him briefly that he may have a cousin coming to stay with them. That was; if he could convince her. As it was it seems one thing hadn't changed with her. She was still considerate of others.
He honestly thought that his place would be better for her then at the temple with his old man. Shuichi had done wonders to heal him from his dark past. He had a thing about accepting people with no reservations. That was just the kind of person he was. As it was now he really could see a lot of himself in his younger cousin. She was hurting, and maybe just maybe, his little lover could help her as well. His phone chimed only a few seconds after he sent the message.
"He's fine with it." He told her as he finished his cigarette just before she did.
Kagome couldn't believe what she was hearing. He was family, but they had only ever been close to each other as small children. It had been years since they had last even spoken. Now here he was making her an offer, and trying to help her were even her mother had given up. Honey brown looked into light brown eyes with appreciation and a small smile. Maybe this could be a good thing.
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Originally this was only going to be a very long one shot, but then I started getting too long. ^_^
Updates will be slow as I have a few other stories in progress as well right now. Hope you liked it, and let me know what you thought!
Until then,
Ryu
