Author's Note: This is for my friend, Myrtle. She's stuck at home with strep/bronchitis and is thoroughly and COMPLETELY miserable writing thank you notes. She also just got new braces. The worst week award goes to…Myrtle! She's also obsessed with Hermione/Draco pairings, which I just don't understand. Anyway, I think she would accept this as a cousin of that pairing. I'm forging new frontiers and becoming more open-minded. Yay me!
Warning: If you are one of my loyal DS readers, don't read this. It will depress you.
Sam picked up the light blue notebook in the library by accident. It was a complete and total accident. She had put her books on top of it and put it in her backpack later. An innocent mistake, right? Could happen to anyone, right?
The why did it have to taunt her? It looked so delectable, such a secret, such a window. How could she pass it up, now that it was on her own turf? It was like…like…like having the enemy's battle strategy and not reading it because that wouldn't be nice!
Dash Baxter was written on the front, along with Ravens Rule! and STAY OUT IF YOU VALUE YOUR LIFE! Sam didn't really take these to heart, as she knew the contents would be totally worth it.
Sam weighed her options. Well, you could always read it and then put it back in the library in the morning. No need for him to even know you ever read it. How can you pass up a chance to read his diary? It would tell you everything! And maybe you'll have a reason to protect him from Danny the next time you saw him.
No, her other side said. You can't go around reading other people's diaries! How would you like it if he read your diary? It's so rude! Just put it back in your-
Sam crossed the room and picked it up. Temptation had won a long time ago. She sat down and opened it carefully, trying not to leave any evidence of prying eyes.
The first entry began, Hey.
Jazz suggested I write stuff down. She said it would help me relieve stress and anger. But I live on stress and anger. That's how I win games. That's how I beat Fenton. That's how I protect myself.
I got another D today. I took it out on Fenton. Sometimes I actually feel bad for him. But I just have to hit something, get it out of my system. If I get another, Coach'll kick me off the team. Fenton's lucky though. He's got a great girlfriend and a nice best friend. I feel like I have too many at times. Too many fake ones. But if I change now, what will happen? I can't join Fenton's group. He'd kill me. But I wish I had a Sam instead of a Paulina.
Sam's eyes widened and she leaned the book down. He likes me. That's so weird! But I feel so bad for him…you shouldn't! He hurts Danny all the time! Yeah but he's frustrated..
She flipped through the book again until she saw a page headed with her name.
Sam
She's so strong, so there, so real.
Why can't everyone be that real?
She has armor of her own, Self-created
But she has a weak link.
Her own friends hurt her with friendly fire.
When they turn and look away without thanks, without any attention spared
She winces, shot down.
Poor Sam.
So strong accept for her weak link.
If only people could see her like I can.
Her friends would, but they're too close.
A strong woman, holding weight for her friends, Caring for them and figuring out the problems,
But who gets no credit.
Not a glance.
I can see her better than anyone.
Now if he could only see me.
Sam actually had to wipe her eyes. She smiled at the page. He described her as she wished other people would. He could see her. Weird how he seemed so different on page.
As the night wore on, Sam learned more and more about Dash Baxter. The weird part was that she liked him more and more with every page.
oOºOoOºOoOºOoOºOoOºOoOºOoOºOo
Sam took a deep breath. It was the next morning at school and her plan was looking awful. Just go up to Dash, it'll be fine, he likes you. Sam squared her shoulders and turned the corner. She walked puposefully up to Dash.
"Umm…Dash?"
Dash turned around and blushed a little when he saw her. "Manson." He saw the book and turned pale. "Where did you get that?" His ears turned red.
Sam felt herself start to relax. "I picked it up in the library by accident." She offered the book to him.
He snatched it and stuffed it in his locker as best he could. "Did you read it?" He said, looking into her eyes desperately.
Sam looked at the ground silently and started scuffing her boot on the floor. This action served as her answer.
"Great……" Dash said, leaned his shoulder against the locker, sagging a little. "I suppose you had a good laugh with Fenton and Foley, right?" He said, miserably.
Sam looked him in the eye. "No, I didn't." She said. She smiled at him and leaned forward and kissed his cheek. "Thank you for seeing me." She whispered, and walked down the hall.
Dash grinned, "Hey Manson?"
Sam turned and smiled at Dash. "Yeah Baxter?"
"Do you wanna go out with me sometime?"
Sam's smile spread from ear to ear. "Of course." She walked down the hall, thinking Finally! Someone who sees me for who I am, not what I am. Little did she know that Dash was watching her thinking the exact same thing.
