Title:
The Defense Mechanisms of Veronica Mars, (As Witnessed by Eli
Navarro)
Author: Batdz Angel
Disclaimer: I don't
own this fabulous, wonderful show cause if I did, Weevil woulda
kissed Veronica stupid by now.
Pairing/Character: Weevil, mentions of WeeVer friendship, some LoVe, and WeeVer romance.
Rating: R for language
Summary: She's almost herself again.
Spoilers: Anything goes, including parts of the season two premiere.
Author's Note: Got bored in my psychology class so I jotted down some bits and pieces of this, just basic scenarios and the like. And once again, thanks to PMD, who keeps looking out for me and giving me plot bunnies!
--
He wonders sometimes if people really believe the image he's projecting; if they look at him in his leather and denim, and just do that. Look and not see the weariness in his eyes or the fact that his smile is a little broken. He knows they all take everything at face value, after all Neptune isn't known for breeding the most intelligent of teen life. You're either rich or not, privileged or scraping for pennies at the gas stations and garages.
He thinks it's a bit sad how Veronica doesn't realize that, despite her words and actions. She wants to be one of those pretty, perfect, plastic people again; he can see it in her eyes and mouth, the way she paints it candy pink with her dollar store lipstick. She's scraping the bottom like he is and she's trying to pretend that she's still got the money to be important.
She doesn't talk about Lilly or Logan. If he mentions the latter, she gets this pinched look on her face, like she's swallowed something sour and if he mentions Lilly, she gets sad and listless like she's forgotten how to be herself without the dirty blonde girl at her side. He figures she's repressing the memories because they're too painful but he knows better than anyone that if you try to stop from remembering they'll overwhelm you eventually.
He read a psychology book once for a report in health class. He wrote a whole paper on defense mechanisms, using his family and friends as examples; no names of course since his grandmother read it after he told her he got an A but she knew who he spoke of nonetheless. He's been cataloguing Veronica's defense mechanisms for a while now but didn't realize it till he saw her one day during summer vacation and was appalled at how quickly she regressed into an imitation of herself.
She's growing her hair out, the color turning more white blonde and he wonders if she knows its unhealthy to be fixated on someone so much, especially someone like Lilly. It's like she's convinced herself that if she wears certain clothing or says certain things, Lilly isn't really dead. But she is dead; Aaron Echolls killed her and that makes him angry at the unfairness of life. Granted, Lilly wasn't a saint or anything; she fucked people over more times than he suspected anyone even realized, Veronica included. But no one deserved to die that way, not even Lilly Kane.
And especially not because of some washed up movie star with a small dick and big ego who got off on fucking underage girls.
She's drifting along now that the murder is solved; doesn't seem to know what to do with herself now that Lilly's killer is behind bars. She's been so intent on figuring out the mystery that she's forgotten who she is and he can see her struggling to find the balance between who she was a year ago and who she is now.
She talks to Duncan in this soft breathy voice, like she's lost too much air. He winces every time he hears it because it makes him nauseous and feel pity for Kane. The rich boy's been hard up for her for a while now, anyone can see that he thinks Veronica walks the moon and Weevil's sorry that he'll learn that Veronica's not his naive little girlfriend. He's sorry that Kane won't know it until Veronica rakes him over the coals like she's done to Logan and himself.
Speaking of, Echolls hasn't been around much lately; up and vanished after the trial. His boys inform him the guy's been seen now and then, leaving his home with his sister and coming back late at night. The favors he does for Veronica are endless. He figures he'll collect when he's old and gray.
They sit in Veronica's car on stakeout, he bitches about the cold coffee and stale donuts. She says sweetly that if it bothers him so much, he can walk home. He accuses her of being a masochist and she laughs, the sound a bit too harsh for his ears. She says she might be and he replies that he's got handcuffs at home. She laughs again at that but it doesn't reach her eyes.
At school the next morning, he finds his bike totaled after last period and the smirk on Casablancas's face makes him see red. Either the boy was dropped on his head as a baby or he was born stupid. Either way, he doesn't care; his boys are on Dick like flies to a body, and he knows Veronica's watching from her car but doesn't care. No one fucks with his property; it's a rule that's unspoken but people? They know.
She doesn't stop them from bloodying Dick up; doesn't say a word but he can feel her disappointment like the water in the ocean. Dick confesses Logan put him up to it and Weevil tells him calmly that if Logan has a problem, he should deal with it himself and not send his little minions. They leave Casablancas on the Echolls's front porch and he watches from the shadows as Logan curses and rages at the white boy.
Veronica comes to him later, angry and furious at him. Her eyes flash as she rails at him, saying that it was unfair beating Dick up like that and he stops her by asking why is she pissed off about Dick? She doesn't like him, doesn't even care about his ass. Isn't it always about Logan?
She turns white at that and grows quiet but he won't let her run away. He tells her he didn't lay a hand on Logan that night on the bridge, he was knocked out cold from a kick to the head, and that the plan was to get the idiot to her safe and sound. She doesn't look like she believes him but he doesn't care; it's the truth and his boys know it.
Problem was that Echolls didn't want to play nice, he tells her, he kicked him in the head and knocked him out. The boys didn't like that and when he woke up, Echolls was bleeding on the cement and he was furious at his orders being ignored. He called an ambulance and they scattered, leaving Echoll's bleeding on the ground.
Why didn't he stay, she asks and he snorts as he points out if he had, he would've been arrested. He's eighteen now and he likes his freedom as it is thanks. She looks sheepish but he finally tells her that if she's going to keep taking the side of the assholes who turned their backs on her, she can forget about favors. She can forget about him all together.
She stares him and walks away.
He tries to act like his heart isn't broken.
The next morning, she's sitting on his bike, holding his helmet. He pauses to look at her for a few minutes then asks what she's doing?
Veronica looks up and smiles in a way that has his breath stopping. She says she owes him a favor. He laughs and says he's not collecting. She says he's got not choice.
He stares and finally shrugs, saying he's always had a thing for blondes.
She laughs again and he can hear a difference; she's not laughing at herself anymore or at the world. She's laughing for the joy of laughing.
He goes with her on stakeout again that night and they debate about politics and religion. They talk about music and films, discovering they both share the same favorite movie, Casablanca. She says she will never understand Ilsa's decision to leave Rick again, and he teases her by saying she's a romantic.
She hits him on the arm with her tiny fist, eyes glittering with laughter, and he smiles because she's almost herself again. Because this time, her eyes aren't almost dead and jaded, this time her eyes are glittering with the one thing he's known has been missing.
Hope.
Finis
