Date

In the not to distant future..

"Jean-Paul, come play tag in the woods tonight."

"No."

"Why not? It'll be fun."

"I'm busy, Bobby"

"With what?"

"I have a date."

I'm very proud of myself. I didn't scream like a little girl.

"Really?"

"No, I'm making it up."

"Really?"

"No."

"Well, who with?"

"No-one you know."

"Is it someone in the mansion?"

"As if I'd date any of the plebeians that live here."

Shall I take offence to that? No, it's too true to be considered a lie.

"Then who?"

"He works in a cafe I sometimes go to on weekends."

"That's not enough, give details man. I need to make sure that his

intentions towards you are pure and honorable."

He's smiling. I made him smile. Go me.

"Bobby, you do not want to know these things. They make you uncomfortable. So why do you ask?"

"What on earth made you think that?"

"I forget nothing, Bobby"

"... that was a long time ago."

"Not so very long ago, my friend."

Later that night..

"So, how was your date?"

"What are you still doing awake?"

"I asked first."

Don't give me that look. If you don't know why I'm awake at 1am waiting for

you to come back when I have a 5am start tomorrow morning, you'll soon

figure it out.

"We went to a Japanese restaraunt, the food was edible and the conversation

was light and interesting. We then went to a club and danced for several

hours while drinking colourful cocktails. It was most enjoyable. I had a

lovely time."

"Nice review."

"You asked."

"You didn't actually tell me anything."

"What do you want to know for? I cannot see what could be so interesting."

"For Barney's sake, Jean-Paul, this is the first time you've gone out with

anyone the entire time I've known you. Of course I'm interested! I thought

you were celibate."

"That explains it then, you don't see me as a sexual being."

"Not till now!"

Oh did that come out wrong. Did he notice that? Please don't let him notice

that. Just walk away. Walk away. Please don't let him see my face.

Two and a half days later..

I am not sulking, I am not embarressed. I am simply a young man who likes to

curl up under his bed, with the door locked and iced shut.

I also like to ignore anyone yelling through said door, in the hope that

they will leave me to die in my jealous confusion.

"Bobby? Come outside now."

Anyone but him.

"Bobby this is ridiculous. Open the door."

Maybe if I'm very quiet he'll go away and move back to Canada so I can leave my room again.

"Bobby... I know you didn't mean anything by it."

Why does he have to keep saying my name? Atleast I'm not "Robert"right now.

I know exactly what he looks like right now, like I can see right through

the door. He's leaning up against it, he dosn't even notice the cold of the

ice. He's touching it with his fingertips, caressing it. Like he's never

seen anything so amazing before.

He pulls his hand away as the ice dissolves from the woodwork, he steps back

as I turn the door knob.

"Took you long enough."

He's sitting on in a chair on the other side of the hall. From the small

stack of books beside it, I'd say he's been there for some time. Curse my

imagination.

"Sorry."

"You should be. I had to take your classes. On my week off. The first in 2

months."

"Sorry."

"You may start explaining now."

"I am really sorry, about the hiding thing and the running away from you

thing."

He looks grumpy, more so then usual.

"When you said that you were going out on a date, I was angry. Which isn't

uncommon really when my friends meet people they like and have good things

happen to them. I often feel angry, and jealous."

"I know this, Bobby, but it is not common for you to stay awake waiting for

them to come home, and then yelling at them for no clear reason. I do not

understand why you did this."

"... I don't understand either."

"I'm going, I have work."

"Bye."

That went well.

Eight weeks, six days later..

"Jean Paul! Pizza!"

"I already have some."

"Damn you superspeeders, in and out before the eye can see. I'm sure you're

all getting together in secret meetings, planning diabolical schemes,

strategizing how best to steal our pizza!"

"Uh huh, is that for me?"

"Mine now. You already have some."

"I finished it."

"You eat like like a lawn mower."

"I am in no way like a lawn mower. Did you want something else?"

"Huh? No, just looking. What are you doing?"

"Writing an email to Carl."

"Carl? His name is Carl? I never knew anyone was actually called that

outside the Simpsons."

"Now you know then."

"Jean Paul, why do you still hang out with this guy. He's so obviously not

worth your time, just look at his email address, how corny is that?"

"What would you suggest I do then Robert? Disconnect from one of the few

people I know outside of this building, stay in a box all my life, only

coming out when I'm needed to teach or fight or keep you company?"

"Of course not."

"Then why do you insist on wishing it so?"

"I just don't think you need him."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"Because you have me. I'm your friend, Jean-Paul."

"Exactly! You are my friend. I need more then that. I am human and I

need love, Bobby, like everybody else."

"But I could lo..."

Oh Shit.

"No, I know you, Bobby. You will not let yourself love me."

I think I'm crying. He is, though you can hardly tell. I always hated people

who could keep their faces calm while crying. My face always shows exactly

how much pain I'm in. Looking across into the mirror above Jean-Paul's

dresser, I see it's happening now.

Three weeks of mutual avoidance, to much thinking and a impossible decision later..

"Hi."

"Bobby?"

"You know what's great? Ice-cream. Let's go get some now."

"No."

Breathe, remember to breathe.

"Yes, we'll go get ice-cream. Then after we can go see a movie."

"I have homework to mark."

"No, you don't. I found someone else to do it. It's possible Emma Frost owns

my soul now."

"Amusing."

"Ain't it? So you coming?"

"No."

"But..."

"No."

"Maybe you..."

"No."

"Jean-Paul..."

"Non! Find someone else!"

"But I want you to be my date."

Holy Fuck!

"Robert."

Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!

"Do not make jokes you know are not funny."

I Am So Fucked!

"I wasn't joking."

Must find sharp object to impale self on now!

"We can uh.. have diner."

Hand me that shovel to help dig my grave.

"Talk about stuff and hold hands."

Someone stop me.

"I like you Jean Paul. I want to make you happy. I want to give you what

you need. All you need. I want this, more then I've wanted anything in a

long while."

Please don't reject me.

"I want you. I don't even care if you don't want me, I'll god damn make you

want me."

I'll die if you hate me.

"Would you go out on a date with me?"

"Bobby."

He's smiling.

I made him smile.

Go me.

End