Santana Lopez stood outside the Lima Bean café, gazing through the window at Kurt Hummel, who was cosying up to his long term boyfriend Blaine Anderson, drinking a coffee. An extreme jealousy overcame Santana – not because she had feelings for any one of them, but because the words of Quinn in a tiny hotel room in New York had suddenly flashed up in her head. "She has it, Tina has it, even Zizes hooks up." Yet here stood Santana, in the middle of a summer heatwave in Ohio, alone again.
I just want someone to love me.
Quinn's words again, resounding in her ears. Santana had someone to love, who loved her back, in the form of her best friend Brittany. Shouldn't it have been as easy as Quinn made it seem? All her reasons for not being together suddenly seemed frivolous as she stood outside the coffee shop in the early morning and watched Kurt and Blaine, so comfortable and open with themselves. Kurt's hand reached out to entwine with Blaine's, and a pang struck Santana's so-called hardened heart as she let a memory consume her.
"Britt?" The 13 year old Santana breathed. Brittany looked over from where she lay on her bed, petting Lord Tubbington, to where Santana stood, running her hands across the trinkets on Brittany's dresser, her hand resting on a photo of the girls with their friends from Summer Camp the previous year.
"Britt, have you ever kissed a girl before?"
"No. Have you?"
"No."
There was a silence as Santana contemplated this response.
"Brittany, if I told you I wanted to kiss girls, would you still be my friend?"
"I'd still be your best friend." Brittany walked over to Santana and kissed her, just a brush of the lips, so fleeting that Santana thought she'd imagined it.
"Promise you won't tell, Britt."
"I promise. I pinky promise."
Their "pinky promise" quickly became a regular trait of their friendship. To others, it was a reminder that the two girls were best friends, and soon Brittany saw it that way too. But to Santana, the pinky link was a constant reminder of what happened that day. Slowly, Santana's mind returned to the present as she twisted her own tanned little finger around the bracelet that lay on her wrist – a gift from Brittany "for our 1 year 6 months friendshippaversary". A sudden feeling of adrenaline spread through her and she burst into the Lima Bean, turning a fair few heads as she pulled a chair over to where Kurt and Blaine sat (having an intense discussion on the topic of TIME Magazine's Most Influential People).
"Oh, hey Santana." Blaine paused, looking at Santana's determined expression. "What's… goin' on?"
"I'm gay."
