First fanfic asspatz only plz

So one day Thom Yorke the awesome guy that he is was juts sitting in the studio one day and was all like "BOY I NEED A NEW SONG TO WRITE AROUND HERE" so he gathered up his band and went on a world tour

Suddenly he was ambushed by none other than

PRESIDENT KEAGER JOHNNY SANAE BOATSWAIN WATTANSTEIN

"HAHAHA NOW TO DO HOSPITAL STUFF" said the sinister president as he challenged Radiohead to a battle of INTENSE DEATIFYING.

Thom Yorke's team was:

*Radiohead

*Kuojirou Sasahara

*AOC

*Excalibur

*The Baseball Guy

*Inverted shad-o

And on the Keager side was:

*Chris Martin

*Matt Bellamy

*Bono

*Touching Story

*Mai Minakami

*Zerostyle

"AUGH NO CHRIS MARTIN MY ARCH-NENEMIS" screamed the Yorke in disbelief.

"Haha, I have truly claimed the FIRST ATTACK on this shit. A winner is me." said Martin.

Then it was

AOC

"NO" said the Oniwaban leader, "OR ENJOYING YOUR VICTORY, NOW IS NOT THE TIME"

Then everyone engaged in a fight so epic that nobody knew who was on who's side, but that's okay because the Kaiten Kimbu Rokuren only works if i'm on one side(FYI it's six slashes in one moment).

Zerostyle reclaimed the head of pretty much everyone except for Radiohead. Then the band stepped up to the batter's plate

Then the Baseball Guy was like "CHECK THIS OUT

MY FASTBALL ATTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK

CYATCH"

But he missed and killed Excalibur and Inverted shad-o. But then shad-o came back from the dead and was like "EUH HUH HUH IT IS I, THE INVERTEDSHADOW" he exclaimed as he charged toward the preisdent and Touching Story. But y'see that's cool because prezzy didn't like Touching Story anyway.

Then Matt Bellamy was like "CHECK THIS OUT

MY GUITAR SOLO ATTAAAAAAAAAAAAAACK

LISTEN"

Then he played the awesome guitar solo from the Muse song Plug in Baby and killed pretty much everyone except for Bono.

Then Zerostyle was all like "BONO CCO, YOUR HEAD BELONGS TO GATSOTSU ZEROSTYLE" and then killed the fucking guy just as he was finishing his new song he wrote for U2.

Now it was just Thom Yorke, Radiohead and Chris Martin. Koujirou and Mai were just sorta bitch-slapping eachother in the background for no reason. But Koujirou is resistant to explosions because he wears a triple cravat so he's obviously winning.

"THIS IS WHERE IT ALL ENDS, CHRIS MARTIN. GIVE UP WHILE YOU STILL CAN."

"No." said Martin in a AOC fasion as he summoned none other than

Coldplay

"YOUR SKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN, OH YEAH YOUR SKIN AND BONES" the band sang as they defeated the Yorke.

But then Jonny Greenwood was like "No" in an AOC fashion again as he played the opening riff to Airbag and killed everyone(including himself) except for Koujirou because he's resistent to explosions.

"HAHAHA, NOW I AM ONCE AGAIN THE BEST ALTERNATIVE ROCK SINGER IN DA WOOOOOOOOORLD" said the victorious dude.

"No." shouted a fimiliar voice. AOC had yet to be defeated.

"Or enjoying your victory, now is not the time."

TOU BIEUGH CAOWUNTIEGHYOUWED